Anyone consider a pre-nuptual?

[tinman 33]

Not that I anticipate wanting or needing one, but just wondered if anyone else will admit the thought of getting one.

I am sure nobody here would like to have that thought...however I have met many divorced Asian women over the years who originally came on Fiance Visas, and now divorced many years later, and have learned from several who admitted to me that they recieved the house and car and alimony as I result of getting divorced.

More than anything, I would like to know how anyone else has handled their inheritance to their kids or whom ever in the event of their possible death.

Not something We want to think about, but it is an important issue.

[lost_at_sea 995]

Not that I anticipate wanting or needing one, but just wondered if anyone else will admit the thought of getting one.

I am sure nobody here would like to have that thought...however I have met many divorced Asian women over the years who originally came on Fiance Visas, and now divorced many years later, and have learned from several who admitted to me that they recieved the house and car and alimony as I result of getting divorced.

More than anything, I would like to know how anyone else has handled their inheritance to their kids or whom ever in the event of their possible death.

Not something We want to think about, but it is an important issue.

After going through a lengthy and irritating divorce procedure (not mine, my other half's ex), we are considering one to save us both the potential frustration in the future... Although, since the divorce is becoming a distant memory, we have talked of the idea less, so maybe we won't now.

Edited January 20, 2013 by lost_at_sea

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Not that I anticipate wanting or needing one, but just wondered if anyone else will admit the thought of getting one.

I am sure nobody here would like to have that thought...however I have met many divorced Asian women over the years who originally came on Fiance Visas, and now divorced many years later, and have learned from several who admitted to me that they recieved the house and car and alimony as I result of getting divorced.

More than anything, I would like to know how anyone else has handled their inheritance to their kids or whom ever in the event of their possible death.

Not something We want to think about, but it is an important issue.

NO

we did write our own wedding vows and made them something we can commit to for our lifetime.

[tinman 33]

WELL..............how nice for You!!!

My post was really intended for someone who has considered the pre-nups..and to get their perspective.

[Kastrs 723]

I know it seems wrong, but yes I was planning on getting a prenup. The reason for this is my parents are divorced and I remember what a struggle it was to divide up everything. Also, I purchased a house a couple of years ago and my mom consigned for me. I think it would be wrong of me not to protect this assert so to speak. No one wants to enter a marriage not in good faith and thinking of divorce, but I think it is important to protect yourself in the event things do not work out. One of the things I believe is that no one will look out for you like yo. You are your own best advocate. This is why I think a prenup is so important.

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

We didn't end up getting a pre-nup when we married in Denmark, although we were going to do it had we continued on with our K1. We will be getting a post-nuptial agreement in America, mostly because I've already inherited some and will be due to inherit a sizeable amount when my mother passes. I don't want my husband to earn equity in a house I've bought with my inheritance money, so alas we've agreed to do a post nuptial.

It doesn't mean that we think we'll get divorced, it is just that I've seen my mother get divorced twice and get screwed over both times by men financially.

[Villanelle 4,122]

While pre-nups are a personal decision each couple has to make for themselves. I personally feel its the responsible thing to do. I dont think it has anything to do with emotions. Its not a statement of- I dont think this is going to last, or Im looking out for myself. Rather its the opposite. Nothing says I dont love you for your money then signing a paper before you marry stating if you divorce you dont get any. I feel it shows you care about the person enough at the beginning that you look towards the future and realize if the worst case scenario plays out and it ends in divorce- you care enough about them now to want the divorce to be easy and painless, not a bitter fight where they are emotionally devastated, but also have to worry about dividing assets. With a pre-nup there is no 'financial agony'over dividing assets in a divorce. You know what youre getting, they know what theyre getting when you separate. Saying I love you and dont want you or I to go through those frustrations after we already lost our marriage which I thought was going to last forever is IMO a

[baron555 934]

however I have met many divorced Asian women over the years who originally came on Fiance Visas, and now divorced many years later,

Go for a FSU woman and you won't have these worries since she'll stay with you for life!

[TBoneTX 45,364]

*** Thread shifted from K-1 Process forum to General Immigration Discussion -- topic not specific to the K-1 process itself. ***

[Tim/Mav 305]

WELL..............how nice for You!!!

My post was really intended for someone who has considered the pre-nups..and to get their perspective.

Your post was intended to Cover your Butt and thats a fair question.

I'm going to agree with Gary. NO

You are doing a K-1 Visa Petition which means Marry in less than 90 days upon her arrival. OK.. Well, there must be a reason why you asked such a question.

Your Vows are going to be: To Love and to Cherrish til death do us part... Then, OH sign this paper first written by my Attorney.

The Pre-Nup must be read to her is her native laugauge in order to be enforceable. Otherwise, VOID.

Why throw a Steel Rod into the spokes before you even start.

I feel, your unsure of yourself. If you have these doubts, then you are not ready.

Your past is the past. Let it go... People will tell you stories and some true but never listen to them. You have to decide where you are.

Thats my prespective.

NO

we did write our own wedding vows and made them something we can commit to for our lifetime.

I agree to the NO. My explaination is below.

[Boggy1974 124]

WELL..............how nice for You!!!

My post was really intended for someone who has considered the pre-nups..and to get their perspective.

Yes. I/we were thinking about it too. One never knows the events of tomorrow, much less five or 10years down the road.

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

Your Vows are going to be: To Love and to Cherrish til death do us part... Then, OH sign this paper first written by my Attorney.

.

Actually that wasn't a part of our vows at all, how presumptuous.

[Merrytooth 5,748]

See this new thread:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/410449-wife-left-and-filed-divorce/

Anything could happen in a marriage.

[aaydrian 479]

Your post was intended to Cover your Butt and thats a fair question.

Your Vows are going to be: To Love and to Cherrish til death do us part... Then, OH sign this paper first written by my Attorney.

...

Why throw a Steel Rod into the spokes before you even start.

I feel, your unsure of yourself. If you have these doubts, then you are not ready.

Your past is the past. Let it go... People will tell you stories and some true but never listen to them. You have to decide where you are.

Thats my prespective.

While it is your perspective it is not even slightly objective.

1) You can't say what this guy's vows will be so you're wrong right there.

2) That steel rod is, as the OP stated, to protect the family (esp his kids) and what he had before he was married.

3) Even though it is your past you would be a fool not to learn from your mistakes or from the mistake of others. The OP heard it almost from the horses mouth (Asian women) and not to even consider second guessing some things is stupid.

4) I've heard from women who are really good people say that if they give their all or feel some how they've been wronged and their boyfriend/husband thinks he's going to screw them over they are going to pay where it hurts. Most times that's the pocket. Those sentiments are truly reflective of what they say about women scorned.

5) Remember courts tend to be sympathetic to women and this guy could loose everything if he doesn't protect himself.

WELL..............how nice for You!!!

My post was really intended for someone who has considered the pre-nups..and to get their perspective.

Do what you think is in your best interest. You both can be madly in love, saying 'I'd never do that' and forever seems attainable but 2, 5, 16 or 20 years down the road could tell a different story.

Get your fiancée a copy of the contract (translated too) and have her have her lawyer go through the details with her so she knows exactly what she's agreeing to. Do things as professionally as possible so there are no loopholes or problems if your prenup needs to be used.

Failure to plan is a plan for failure.

[Tim/Mav 305]

Advice is good on this subject and each to his own or her own. But be very careful. To the OP, your future bride is very pretty. Does that scare you that later when she adapts to the US your Bacon is no good no more. Then, let her go. If you are afraid to look into the MIRROR.. Then let it go. Pre-nup or not, you are locked into a Contract either way.

Negative Vibes.. Always look for the worst and you will find it. Look for the good and it is posible it is there. Life is a chance.