Yardies, at home and a farrin'

[Yaads 0]

good afternoon

We sooooooooooooooooooooo need this

Spoon her

I had to laugh at this...it sounds so violent.

"To get that crazy lady to shut up just spoon her!"

They are good ideas though! Thanks

Edited March 16, 2006 by Jme3584

[luvtravlin 0]

Is there a blank form of the DS230 listed on a website somewhere? Or does anyone have a copy that you can fax to me or email me a copy ?? I'm trying to help Craig fill out his information and it's frustrating to say the least (as you all know).

Thanks !

Kelly

Hey Kelly,

Look under "Examples Forms" here on the VJ site and you can get a copy of the DS230 form...it is a fillible forms that is where I got Adrains form from....Hope this helps

Hello everyone else, I am going to do my bridal registry today at Bed Bath and Beyond, I dont need too much but there are a few things we could use, my friend is throwing me a bridal shower at the end of April, she wants to have it before Adrian gets here so I dont have to leave him alone, while I go have a party.

So will chat later, Joanna

Thanks Joanna--to be honest, I haven't had time to "research"....I filled it out and I'm going to send it to him.

[Yaads 0]

Ok I have a question. I know it's late on Friday but hopefully we can get some good answers over the next couple of days.

I have been reading around the site and looking up AOS ####### and I have noticed a few posts where the couple has gone through this entire visa process and been approved and then shortly after the beneficiary arrives they break up and want to know how to "ship them back". The visa process takes a considerable amount of time, effort, and money so what happens to make some change their mind so quickly? So for the real questions...

-Have any of you regretted or doubted your decision once your SO was here?

-Are things just not what they were when you were still in the LDR?

-What do you think makes someone change their mind so quickly?

Anyone feel free to chime in...even if your SO is still overseas.

Just wondering about this as it seems to happen way more than it should

Have a good weekend

[AnnTaylor 0]

Ok I have a question. I know it's late on Friday but hopefully we can get some good answers over the next couple of days.

I have been reading around the site and looking up AOS ####### and I have noticed a few posts where the couple has gone through this entire visa process and been approved and then shortly after the beneficiary arrives they break up and want to know how to "ship them back". The visa process takes a considerable amount of time, effort, and money so what happens to make some change their mind so quickly? So for the real questions...

-Have any of you regretted or doubted your decision once your SO was here?

-Are things just not what they were when you were still in the LDR?

-What do you think makes someone change their mind so quickly?

Anyone feel free to chime in...even if your SO is still overseas.

Just wondering about this as it seems to happen way more than it should

Have a good weekend

There is a culture shock and difference of opinion, homesickness and a feeling of helplessness that must be addressed. Honesty and talking about the issues and the serious stuff matters.

All LDRs are costly, trying and have emotional trauma for both parties. With LDR you need to follow your heart. Ninety percent of the time its right.

Lack of commitment, misunderstanding, and failure to communicate, lack of support from family and friends and above all a lack of faith in God.

P.S. Keep the faith!

Ann & Anthony

[jkb919 0]

Hello everyone else, I am going to do my bridal registry today at Bed Bath and Beyond, I dont need too much but there are a few things we could use, my friend is throwing me a bridal shower at the end of April, she wants to have it before Adrian gets here so I dont have to leave him alone, while I go have a party.

So will chat later, Joanna

I love Bed, Bath, & Beyond! We registered at Kohl's (which I don't think you have in FL) and Target. Tony went to the Bridal Shower with me and helped me open the gifts Everyone wanted to meet him anyways. We had the shower 1 month after he got here and the wedding 1 month after the shower. NONE of it was planned until after he arrived in the U.S.!!! My mom is GOOD! We were just going to get married by a judge or something but my parents wanted me to have a "real" wedding with a shower and everything. It was small (about 30 people) but really nice.

Have fun registering - it's like shopping without spending any money Let us know when you're registered so I can go on-line and see what you want

Well I am back from registering at Bed Bath and Beyond, I only registered for about 20 things and the most expensive thing was only $34.99 , I dont really need to much as I have been established in my apartment for years now. The main thing I was going to register for was bath towels, but they had some nice ones for 40% off so I just went ahead and bought them ....and Rhonda yes we have a Kohl's here in Florida but there is not one near me, my parents have one near them. But I know what you mean I keep telling my parents we will just go to the court house and get married, but they are not having it, they said I have to have a wedding, so it will be about 50-60 people....Me and my parents have an appointment next friday to go check out one of the Doubletree Hotels here....we will have the ceremoney and reception at the same place, and more then likely it will be at a hotel, it is just easier for out of town guests.

So, we are doing the full blown wedding thing also, I already know the florist, DJ and photographer I am going to use, I just need to find a place to have the wedding and a bakery for the cake....Mom also says that I have to have a traditional wedding cake and a grooms cake (who does grooms cakes anymore?? )...but the grooms cake will be a Jamaican black fruit cake from one of the caribbean bakeries we have here...

anyway enough about wedding #######...hope everyone has a great weekend, I of course will be at work

Until later, Joanna

[Minfay 0]

Jamie -- I agree with everthing that Ann said....she has very valid points.

Why do people break up? I think it's because the process is soooo stressful and it really does take it's toll. I really don't think people change their minds so fast -- I think it's an ongoing process. Not many of us had the "luxury" of being able to spend LOTS of quality time with or fiancees. You think you know them. You hope you know them. But you just really don't know until you are living together.

Why do people wait? Probably two reasons. One, you know you are having problems and hope that when you get through the process everything will be "perfect" -- OR -- You (the USC) was totally being used and now that the "process" is done the "real" person (that you thought you loved and went through all this bullshit for) comes out. That would be the person who was using you for the GC.

Regarding the LDR -- I have said it before and I will say it again. Jamaica is Fantasy Island. Nothing that happens there is what happens in real life. When you bring them into "your" life everything becomes real. It's not a fantasy anymore. This is when you really need to be strong. Going through the whole K-1 process (up until the interview is over) is a piece of cake compared to what happens when they get to America. I think that goes for anyone coming from any country in which "them" obtaining a Tourist Visa is impossible thus making a visit to you impossible.

I don't know about you but I did all the work for this. And I am still doing all the work for this. Sometimes (and I will admit it), I get home and I am bitter that I was working all day and he was sitting around watching TV. I am tired when I get home and he wants to talk because he has been home alone all day. Talking to him on the phone was much less stressful and (at times) much more fun that what "real life" has become.

NOW DON'T GET ME WRONG -- I don't regret anything. I am happier than a pig in ###### that he is finally here, we are married and getting on with our lives. But, no relationship is easy and I just think that on a whole the LDR's are tested much more than any other relationship.

Sorry, I'm done now. See what you did, Jamie!!

[Yaads 0]

Sorry, I'm done now. See what you did, Jamie!!

Looks like Rhonda isn't the only chatty one

Very good points so far...It's interesting to see what others thing of...I thought some of those but not all. Now that I think about it they are all very valid points.

[AnnTaylor 0]

Jamie -- I agree with everthing that Ann said....she has very valid points.

Why do people break up? I think it's because the process is soooo stressful and it really does take it's toll. I really don't think people change their minds so fast -- I think it's an ongoing process. Not many of us had the "luxury" of being able to spend LOTS of quality time with or fiancees. You think you know them. You hope you know them. But you just really don't know until you are living together.

Why do people wait? Probably two reasons. One, you know you are having problems and hope that when you get through the process everything will be "perfect" -- OR -- You (the USC) was totally being used and now that the "process" is done the "real" person (that you thought you loved and went through all this bullshit for) comes out. That would be the person who was using you for the GC.

Regarding the LDR -- I have said it before and I will say it again. Jamaica is Fantasy Island. Nothing that happens there is what happens in real life. When you bring them into "your" life everything becomes real. It's not a fantasy anymore. This is when you really need to be strong. Going through the whole K-1 process (up until the interview is over) is a piece of cake compared to what happens when they get to America. I think that goes for anyone coming from any country in which "them" obtaining a Tourist Visa is impossible thus making a visit to you impossible.

I don't know about you but I did all the work for this. And I am still doing all the work for this. Sometimes (and I will admit it), I get home and I am bitter that I was working all day and he was sitting around watching TV. I am tired when I get home and he wants to talk because he has been home alone all day. Talking to him on the phone was much less stressful and (at times) much more fun that what "real life" has become.

NOW DON'T GET ME WRONG -- I don't regret anything. I am happier than a pig in ###### that he is finally here, we are married and getting on with our lives. But, no relationship is easy and I just think that on a whole the LDR's are tested much more than any other relationship.

Sorry, I'm done now. See what you did, Jamie!!

Hi Minfay,

Saw your e-mail -- Jamaica is anything but Fantasy Island. There are ladies and gentlemen with real needs, real desires and genuine interests of the heart. It's a two-way street-life and love, crossing a broken yellow line can be either good or bad. It depends on how long you have been with the person and know the person. You can live with a person 50 years and still never get to know that person. In six months you can know the person better than in that 50 years what they will or will not do, morally speaking. As you said, once you are happy nothing else matters. Time is a virtue.

/s/

Anthony

[woogietail 0]

Looks like a few of us will be in Jamaica within the next few weeks-from what I can recount:

Jill (ChrisineJames) [are you packed yet?]

Kelly? (luvtravelin)

Michele (Jamaica to CT)

Dru (woogietail)

Eric (eric_drewey)

Jax (BelwinMills)

anybody else?

...adding Tenika to the list

Where's everyone staying? I'll be in Mobay. I think a couple of you will be in Negril the same week I'm in JA.

I will be staying at the Knutsford in New Kingston. This is a work trip, with hopes of an Interview before I leave, odds are against me there, but they said they'd try. Maybe I'll come back a little late with my wife..

That would be great, hoping like mad that it happens that way

[woogietail 0]

Hello everyone else, I am going to do my bridal registry today at Bed Bath and Beyond, I dont need too much but there are a few things we could use, my friend is throwing me a bridal shower at the end of April, she wants to have it before Adrian gets here so I dont have to leave him alone, while I go have a party.

So will chat later, Joanna

I love Bed, Bath, & Beyond! We registered at Kohl's (which I don't think you have in FL) and Target. Tony went to the Bridal Shower with me and helped me open the gifts Everyone wanted to meet him anyways. We had the shower 1 month after he got here and the wedding 1 month after the shower. NONE of it was planned until after he arrived in the U.S.!!! My mom is GOOD! We were just going to get married by a judge or something but my parents wanted me to have a "real" wedding with a shower and everything. It was small (about 30 people) but really nice.

No one could've said it better than you and Ann. I definitely couldn't.

Have fun registering - it's like shopping without spending any money Let us know when you're registered so I can go on-line and see what you want

Well I am back from registering at Bed Bath and Beyond, I only registered for about 20 things and the most expensive thing was only $34.99 , I dont really need to much as I have been established in my apartment for years now. The main thing I was going to register for was bath towels, but they had some nice ones for 40% off so I just went ahead and bought them ....and Rhonda yes we have a Kohl's here in Florida but there is not one near me, my parents have one near them. But I know what you mean I keep telling my parents we will just go to the court house and get married, but they are not having it, they said I have to have a wedding, so it will be about 50-60 people....Me and my parents have an appointment next friday to go check out one of the Doubletree Hotels here....we will have the ceremoney and reception at the same place, and more then likely it will be at a hotel, it is just easier for out of town guests.

So, we are doing the full blown wedding thing also, I already know the florist, DJ and photographer I am going to use, I just need to find a place to have the wedding and a bakery for the cake....Mom also says that I have to have a traditional wedding cake and a grooms cake (who does grooms cakes anymore?? )...but the grooms cake will be a Jamaican black fruit cake from one of the caribbean bakeries we have here...

anyway enough about wedding #######...hope everyone has a great weekend, I of course will be at work

Until later, Joanna

Jamie -- I agree with everthing that Ann said....she has very valid points.

Why do people break up? I think it's because the process is soooo stressful and it really does take it's toll. I really don't think people change their minds so fast -- I think it's an ongoing process. Not many of us had the "luxury" of being able to spend LOTS of quality time with or fiancees. You think you know them. You hope you know them. But you just really don't know until you are living together.

Why do people wait? Probably two reasons. One, you know you are having problems and hope that when you get through the process everything will be "perfect" -- OR -- You (the USC) was totally being used and now that the "process" is done the "real" person (that you thought you loved and went through all this bullshit for) comes out. That would be the person who was using you for the GC.

Regarding the LDR -- I have said it before and I will say it again. Jamaica is Fantasy Island. Nothing that happens there is what happens in real life. When you bring them into "your" life everything becomes real. It's not a fantasy anymore. This is when you really need to be strong. Going through the whole K-1 process (up until the interview is over) is a piece of cake compared to what happens when they get to America. I think that goes for anyone coming from any country in which "them" obtaining a Tourist Visa is impossible thus making a visit to you impossible.

I don't know about you but I did all the work for this. And I am still doing all the work for this. Sometimes (and I will admit it), I get home and I am bitter that I was working all day and he was sitting around watching TV. I am tired when I get home and he wants to talk because he has been home alone all day. Talking to him on the phone was much less stressful and (at times) much more fun that what "real life" has become.

NOW DON'T GET ME WRONG -- I don't regret anything. I am happier than a pig in ###### that he is finally here, we are married and getting on with our lives. But, no relationship is easy and I just think that on a whole the LDR's are tested much more than any other relationship.

Sorry, I'm done now. See what you did, Jamie!!

I tried to reply to this before but it went into space somewhere, anyway I don't think anybody could have answered this better than you and Ann. You hit on all the right points.

[Yaads 0]

Ok I have a question. I know it's late on Friday but hopefully we can get some good answers over the next couple of days.

Have a good weekend

What was I thinking

It is only THURSDAY!!! Wow I am losing it

You can tell how excited I am for the weekend

[Jamaica to CT 0]

Hello everyone else, I am going to do my bridal registry today at Bed Bath and Beyond, I dont need too much but there are a few things we could use, my friend is throwing me a bridal shower at the end of April, she wants to have it before Adrian gets here so I dont have to leave him alone, while I go have a party.

So will chat later, Joanna

I love Bed, Bath, & Beyond! We registered at Kohl's (which I don't think you have in FL) and Target. Tony went to the Bridal Shower with me and helped me open the gifts Everyone wanted to meet him anyways. We had the shower 1 month after he got here and the wedding 1 month after the shower. NONE of it was planned until after he arrived in the U.S.!!! My mom is GOOD! We were just going to get married by a judge or something but my parents wanted me to have a "real" wedding with a shower and everything. It was small (about 30 people) but really nice.

No one could've said it better than you and Ann. I definitely couldn't.

Have fun registering - it's like shopping without spending any money Let us know when you're registered so I can go on-line and see what you want

Well I am back from registering at Bed Bath and Beyond, I only registered for about 20 things and the most expensive thing was only $34.99 , I dont really need to much as I have been established in my apartment for years now. The main thing I was going to register for was bath towels, but they had some nice ones for 40% off so I just went ahead and bought them ....and Rhonda yes we have a Kohl's here in Florida but there is not one near me, my parents have one near them. But I know what you mean I keep telling my parents we will just go to the court house and get married, but they are not having it, they said I have to have a wedding, so it will be about 50-60 people....Me and my parents have an appointment next friday to go check out one of the Doubletree Hotels here....we will have the ceremoney and reception at the same place, and more then likely it will be at a hotel, it is just easier for out of town guests.

So, we are doing the full blown wedding thing also, I already know the florist, DJ and photographer I am going to use, I just need to find a place to have the wedding and a bakery for the cake....Mom also says that I have to have a traditional wedding cake and a grooms cake (who does grooms cakes anymore?? )...but the grooms cake will be a Jamaican black fruit cake from one of the caribbean bakeries we have here...

anyway enough about wedding #######...hope everyone has a great weekend, I of course will be at work

Until later, Joanna

Jamie -- I agree with everthing that Ann said....she has very valid points.

Why do people break up? I think it's because the process is soooo stressful and it really does take it's toll. I really don't think people change their minds so fast -- I think it's an ongoing process. Not many of us had the "luxury" of being able to spend LOTS of quality time with or fiancees. You think you know them. You hope you know them. But you just really don't know until you are living together.

Why do people wait? Probably two reasons. One, you know you are having problems and hope that when you get through the process everything will be "perfect" -- OR -- You (the USC) was totally being used and now that the "process" is done the "real" person (that you thought you loved and went through all this bullshit for) comes out. That would be the person who was using you for the GC.

Regarding the LDR -- I have said it before and I will say it again. Jamaica is Fantasy Island. Nothing that happens there is what happens in real life. When you bring them into "your" life everything becomes real. It's not a fantasy anymore. This is when you really need to be strong. Going through the whole K-1 process (up until the interview is over) is a piece of cake compared to what happens when they get to America. I think that goes for anyone coming from any country in which "them" obtaining a Tourist Visa is impossible thus making a visit to you impossible.

I don't know about you but I did all the work for this. And I am still doing all the work for this. Sometimes (and I will admit it), I get home and I am bitter that I was working all day and he was sitting around watching TV. I am tired when I get home and he wants to talk because he has been home alone all day. Talking to him on the phone was much less stressful and (at times) much more fun that what "real life" has become.

NOW DON'T GET ME WRONG -- I don't regret anything. I am happier than a pig in ###### that he is finally here, we are married and getting on with our lives. But, no relationship is easy and I just think that on a whole the LDR's are tested much more than any other relationship.

Sorry, I'm done now. See what you did, Jamie!!

I tried to reply to this before but it went into space somewhere, anyway I don't think anybody could have answered this better than you(Mindy) and Ann. You hit on all the right points.

Excellent points both.

Jamie says the weekend is here; let's see if that flies at work tomorrow

Edited March 16, 2006 by Jamaica to CT

[Minfay 0]

Hi Minfay,

Saw your e-mail -- Jamaica is anything but Fantasy Island. There are ladies and gentlemen with real needs, real desires and genuine interests of the heart. It's a two-way street-life and love, crossing a broken yellow line can be either good or bad. It depends on how long you have been with the person and know the person. You can live with a person 50 years and still never get to know that person. In six months you can know the person better than in that 50 years what they will or will not do, morally speaking. As you said, once you are happy nothing else matters. Time is a virtue.

/s/

Anthony

Ann -- maybe I didn't really clarify (enough) what I was saying. You are right, there are people there with real needs, I am not disputing that.

The point I was trying to make is -- before and during this process there are not many people who have the $$$$$ to be able to travel to Jamaica every other weekend to be with their significant other to be able to spend real quality time with them. And many people do not have the luxury to be able to "live" with their significant others in their homes and be a true part of their "real" lives -- they have to stay in hotels (and such).

That was the point that I was trying to get to. Jamaica is a place that I go on vacation. It just happens to also be the place where I met the love of my life -- who, by the way, only made $40.00 a week US and lived in a 10 x 10 room with no indoor plumbing. Yeah, we stayed at the Hilton everytime I went to visit -- to him, that was Fantasy Island. To me, it was too.

Real life happens when they land at that airport in the States and it all becomes way too real. I went to wash my truck the other day -- Roy had never been in an automatic car wash before. He had never been on an escalator before. He never had spinach dip, mint chocolate ice cream, cheese popcorn, pop tarts or fish sticks before. Did I know any of this before he got here -- no. Does it matter -- no. BUT, if we had the opportunity to not be "stuck" on that island I think his transition here would be much easier.

That being said, I think I know Roy better than any other man I was ever in a realtionship with. Being forced to spend quality time with him when I visited was priceless to me. Talking on the phone -- I listened to every word he said......I never took anything for granted -- and neither did he.

Now I will really shut up. Sorry!!

[jkb919 0]

I have really enjoyed reading these last posts and as I have said before I am so glad that I have you girls to chat with and discuss situations, I make sure to make mental notes about everything you guys write, from your experience's. I know Adrians transition will be hard when he gets here but I am lucky that he has been working on the ship for almost 3 years and has experienced some of the things here in the US that he would have not had a chance to experience in JA, like Mindy mentioned all the things Roy has done here for the 1st time, Adrian has luckly experienced these things on the ship and has had a chance to interact with American people on the ship. I truely hope each and everyone of your relationships continue to thrive and we all grow together stronger then ever.

Please everyone continue to share your experiences with all of us here.....Personally each one of you have helped me in one way or another!!!! I love you guys

And Jamie I also thought it was Friday all day today

Joanna

[AnnTaylor 0]

Hi Minfay,

Saw your e-mail -- Jamaica is anything but Fantasy Island. There are ladies and gentlemen with real needs, real desires and genuine interests of the heart. It's a two-way street-life and love, crossing a broken yellow line can be either good or bad. It depends on how long you have been with the person and know the person. You can live with a person 50 years and still never get to know that person. In six months you can know the person better than in that 50 years what they will or will not do, morally speaking. As you said, once you are happy nothing else matters. Time is a virtue.

/s/

Anthony

Ann -- maybe I didn't really clarify (enough) what I was saying. You are right, there are people there with real needs, I am not disputing that.

The point I was trying to make is -- before and during this process there are not many people who have the $$$$$ to be able to travel to Jamaica every other weekend to be with their significant other to be able to spend real quality time with them. And many people do not have the luxury to be able to "live" with their significant others in their homes and be a true part of their "real" lives -- they have to stay in hotels (and such).

That was the point that I was trying to get to. Jamaica is a place that I go on vacation. It just happens to also be the place where I met the love of my life -- who, by the way, only made $40.00 a week US and lived in a 10 x 10 room with no indoor plumbing. Yeah, we stayed at the Hilton everytime I went to visit -- to him, that was Fantasy Island. To me, it was too.

Real life happens when they land at that airport in the States and it all becomes way too real. I went to wash my truck the other day -- Roy had never been in an automatic car wash before. He had never been on an escalator before. He never had spinach dip, mint chocolate ice cream, cheese popcorn, pop tarts or fish sticks before. Did I know any of this before he got here -- no. Does it matter -- no. BUT, if we had the opportunity to not be

"stuck" on that island I think his transition here would be much easier.

That being said, I think I know Roy better than any other man I was ever in a realtionship with. Being forced to spend quality time with him when I visited was priceless to me. Talking on the phone -- I listened to every word he said......I never took anything for granted -- and neither did he.

Now I will really shut up. Sorry!!

REFLECTIONS

Never be afraid of this tomorrow of having he/she near

There are trials, errors in any formula to have the proper doses of love

To find the one who cares God knows if tomorrow he/she will be Dear

We started friends now my heart always wants you near

At times we are all afraid, what really made us afraid

Was it something we saw or something that was said?

Imagine no heaven, even with John Lennon dead--that was a lot he said

Online visa journey you ladies/gents do so much--still so much to be done

Tears, fears, distraught is just the start to obtain the love of your heart

Love is always compared to a rose--to me so delicate a touch could harm it

So strong--nothing can hurt it

I talk this truth--my heart has been to and from seeking happiness

Found hurt and pain--at times refused to go on and then I remember Solomon

He knew what love really is--love nor -knowledge nor wisdom is in the grave

No one sees the heart but God

Madness is in the heart of love

For the living know that they will die but the dead know not anything

For in life there is hope--for a living dog is better than a dead lion

Live joyfully with the person of your life for the time is short

Tomorrow, the last time we checked was not promised to us

Yet optimistically we all made plans

Be not afraid of tomorrow

Live life and be happy

by Anthony Henry

March 16, 2006

To All VJers: