K1/K2 Visa and student in high school....

[crispy2 0]

Hi everyone,

I am not sure if this is the correct forum for this post but will put it out here and see where it goes.

I will try not to be too lengthy but the short of it is this..... I am a USC and I brought my wife and her son over here on a K1/K2 Visa earlier this year and we were married within the 90 day window. Since then things have become extremely difficult in the marriage and I feel that the best thing to do is to divorce as much as I hate to say. My wife and I have talked a lot about our relationship, I have sought counsel from my pastors and friends and family and nothing is improving. Our AOS interview is coming up next month and I really don't feel comfortable going into it with things the way they are.

My wife has a 17 yo son from a previous marriage who came over on the K2 visa, (we have no kids together) and he is a senior in our public school system. I am reluctant to move forward with the AOS process but I honestly feel bad because if I do withdraw my application for her and her son and divorce then I am assuming he will need to leave the school system mid-year.

I was wondering is, there any way for him to stay here with a "host family", provided I can coordinate one, and finish out his senior year in school before he must go back?

I am fairly stressed about this whole situation as I never wanted things to go like this but unfortunately they have and I am trying to make the best out a not so good situation. Or should I just quit trying to be nice and rip the band-aide off so to speak?

Any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks in advance.

C

[canadian_wife 1,822]

It doesn't matter if you find a host family, it matters what the child's legal status is.

Now, I would never advocate doing anything illegal, but there are a lot of undocumented students in my school

good luck

[Boiler 45,526]

Sounds like the 90 days have passed, also begs the question whether if he was in status on a K2 he could adjust to another status, in this case F1.

I think not, but I do not remember this situation arising before.

[Chuck and Diana 1]

Chris

Congratulations on your marriage, and I am sorry to hear you are having problems. I am here to tell you that you are not alone. Everyone who brings a foreign wife over to the USA will quickly find obstacles in their way. It can be especially difficult trying to be a step father at the same time (speaking from experience here). It can be difficult for her waiting to be able to work, trying to get a drivers license, going to a job interview, working for minimum wage even though she has a college degree. It can be difficult adapting to American culture and understanding your spouse. It can be complicated understanding the other persons parenting style and getting used to it.

My advice is to go to your AOS interview, get them their green cards, and in May, send them home to Moldova for the summer. A little time apart might be all that is needed. I think if you get a divorce and call it quits after 6 months together, then you will both regret not doing everything you could to make it work. Long term, I think you really have a chance to succeed if you can just make it thru the next few months.

The AOS interview is pretty easy, but you both have to show up with your step son. If she goes home with a green card, then you have the option of changing your mind and simply flying her back here. If she does not have a green card and she goes home and you change your mind, then you have to go thru a very difficult and long wait trying to get her home. I dont mean to sound impersonal, but another consideration is taxes, both your wife, and your step son must be residents to be claimed on taxes for 2012.... Dont file taxes until they have a green card and a social security card.

I wish you luck, I hope you and your family are able to work thru this difficult situation and come out stronger on the other side. I will pray for you and your family and I hope you are able to succeed.

Chuck

[aaron2020 11,651]

Chris

Congratulations on your marriage, and I am sorry to hear you are having problems. I am here to tell you that you are not alone. Everyone who brings a foreign wife over to the USA will quickly find obstacles in their way. It can be especially difficult trying to be a step father at the same time (speaking from experience here). It can be difficult for her waiting to be able to work, trying to get a drivers license, going to a job interview, working for minimum wage even though she has a college degree. It can be difficult adapting to American culture and understanding your spouse. It can be complicated understanding the other persons parenting style and getting used to it.

My advice is to go to your AOS interview, get them their green cards, and in May, send them home to Moldova for the summer. A little time apart might be all that is needed. I think if you get a divorce and call it quits after 6 months together, then you will both regret not doing everything you could to make it work. Long term, I think you really have a chance to succeed if you can just make it thru the next few months.

The AOS interview is pretty easy, but you both have to show up with your step son. If she goes home with a green card, then you have the option of changing your mind and simply flying her back here. If she does not have a green card and she goes home and you change your mind, then you have to go thru a very difficult and long wait trying to get her home. I dont mean to sound impersonal, but another consideration is taxes, both your wife, and your step son must be residents to be claimed on taxes for 2012.... Dont file taxes until they have a green card and a social security card.

I wish you luck, I hope you and your family are able to work thru this difficult situation and come out stronger on the other side. I will pray for you and your family and I hope you are able to succeed.

Chuck

If the marriage is breaking down, why would he want to make a potentially lifetime commitment with the I-864? Even divorce afterwards would not erase this commitment.

Also, how would you suggest he answer questions about the condition of his marriage at the adjustment interview?

Being nice and letting them get their green cards is not without risks.

If he is looking at a divorce and ending his relationship, then binding him to them for potentially a very long time is not a good long term plan.

[Boiler 45,526]

How will he send her anywhere?

What about the Affidavit of Support?

[Chuck and Diana 1]

If the marriage is breaking down, why would he want to make a potentially lifetime commitment with the I-864? Even divorce afterwards would not erase this commitment.

Also, how would you suggest he answer questions about the condition of his marriage at the adjustment interview?

Being nice and letting them get their green cards is not without risks.

If he is looking at a divorce and ending his relationship, then binding him to them for potentially a very long time is not a good long term plan.

He is currently commited with his affadavit of support from the K-1 visa, the I-864 will extend that while she has a 2 year conditional green card. If she gets a divorce, she is required to go home. Bottom line, yes husbands are responsible for their wife. If they get a divorce, he has to pay to send her home and it doesnt matter whether she AOS or not. I would suggest he answer honestly at the interview, marriage problems in the first 6 months of marriage are pretty common. I would NOT suggest he treat the interview like marriage counseling, but nothing wrong with admitting that you have had some difficult times. AOS will be granted because they have a legitimate marriage. Its not about being nice, its about if you divorce after a few months of marriage, you are risking making a decision that you may regret the rest of your life. I got a divorce after 15 years of marriage, I am not judging, just suggesting he give it a little more time. I know that time between getting married and getting green cards can be particular difficult on a couple and sometimes it is just better to give it some time before going to divorce court. Divorce should be a last resort, after exhausting all efforts. You know sometimes when your spouse comes here from a foreign country, everything is strange and new, and they think if they just could go home (especially around christmas), then they .... only remember nice things about home and seem to only be able to see negative things about their new home. Truth is that if she goes home for the summer, she will remember all the reasons she left home in the first place, and she will miss her husband and her home in California. I am sure Chris will make the right decision for his situation, and all you and I can do is give him advice based on our experiences.

[Boiler 45,526]

You are new so you may not know.

K1's require a 134.

And you are confusing Immigration Law and Civil Law.

A very bad idea to go through adjustment in the situation described.

[Chuck and Diana 1]

How will he send her anywhere?

What about the Affidavit of Support?

He did a affadavit of support for K-1 and if he is going to the AOS interview next month, he has already submitted the I-864 one with the application probably 3 months ago.

Send her? Ok, I meant buy her tickets so she can fly home for a couple of months. What I meant with that is that maybe the problem is that she is homesick and misses her family and that is causing more problems. Your wife doesnt miss home???

[Chuck and Diana 1]

You are new so you may not know.

K1's require a 134.

And you are confusing Immigration Law and Civil Law.

A very bad idea to go through adjustment in the situation described.

Ok oldtimer, I am new, but I have recently went thru the process.

Not trying to pretend to be a lawyer, but I would NOT suggest using a lawyer anyway with immigration or divorce.

Maybe you are right, there is no hurry to AOS anyway, the wife and the stepson are here legally either way, only thing they need the green card for is travel outside the US and employment.

However consider this, he has already paid because his interview is next month, so he probably paid 3 months ago when he applied, so if he cancels his interview, then he has just thrown over a thousand dollars away (around 1600 if he applied for both at the same time) when he might change his mind over the next few months then have to pay and wait again.

[Boiler 45,526]

He did a affadavit of support for K-1 and if he is going to the AOS interview next month, he has already submitted the I-864 one with the application probably 3 months ago.

K1 is not enforceable, AoS he can withdraw

Send her? Ok, I meant buy her tickets so she can fly home for a couple of months. What I meant with that is that maybe the problem is that she is homesick and misses her family and that is causing more problems. Your wife doesnt miss home???

Delaware? Not to the extent she would want to move back there.

Not trying to pretend to be a lawyer, but I would NOT suggest using a lawyer anyway with immigration or divorce.

Most people on here have done their own Immigration.

Maybe you are right, there is no hurry to AOS anyway, the wife and the stepson are here legally either way, only thing they need the green card for is travel outside the US and employment.

Really?

However consider this, he has already paid because his interview is next month, so he probably paid 3 months ago when he applied, so if he cancels his interview, then he has just thrown over a thousand dollars away (around 1600 if he applied for both at the same time) when he might change his mind over the next few months then have to pay and wait again.

Peanuts in the scheme of things.

[aaron2020 11,651]

Ok oldtimer, I am new, but I have recently went thru the process.

Not trying to pretend to be a lawyer, but I would NOT suggest using a lawyer anyway with immigration or divorce.

Maybe you are right, there is no hurry to AOS anyway, the wife and the stepson are here legally either way, only thing they need the green card for is travel outside the US and employment.

However consider this, he has already paid because his interview is next month, so he probably paid 3 months ago when he applied, so if he cancels his interview, then he has just thrown over a thousand dollars away (around 1600 if he applied for both at the same time) when he might change his mind over the next few months then have to pay and wait again.

If you are going to insult people, at least be right. You are wrong newbie.

[aaron2020 11,651]

He is currently commited with his affadavit of support from the K-1 visa, the I-864 will extend that while she has a 2 year conditional green card.

The I-134 is not enforceable, so he isn't committed to anything. Try using Google "I-134 not enforceable." The I-864 is enforceable. You are recommending he helps her adjust to get a green card and make himself committed to reimburse the US government. Right now, he is not committed on any enforceable affidavit of support.

Wrong #1.

If she gets a divorce, she is required to go home.

Why would she be required to go home after he gets her a green card as you suggest and then subsequently divorce? She can still remove the condition by herself, stay in the US forever, and he would be stuck with the I-864 Affidavit of Support which would be enforceable.

Wrong #2.

Bottom line, yes husbands are responsible for their wife.

Which century do you live in where husbands for responsible for their wives?

If they get a divorce, he has to pay to send her home and it doesnt matter whether she AOS or not.

Which law says he has to pay to send her home? Please point out this law that does not exist. I can't point you to something that does not exist, and neither can you. There is no law that requires him to pay to send her home.

Wrong #3.

I would suggest he answer honestly at the interview, marriage problems in the first 6 months of marriage are pretty common. I would NOT suggest he treat the interview like marriage counseling, but nothing wrong with admitting that you have had some difficult times. AOS will be granted because they have a legitimate marriage. Its not about being nice, its about if you divorce after a few months of marriage, you are risking making a decision that you may regret the rest of your life. I got a divorce after 15 years of marriage, I am not judging, just suggesting he give it a little more time. I know that time between getting married and getting green cards can be particular difficult on a couple and sometimes it is just better to give it some time before going to divorce court. Divorce should be a last resort, after exhausting all efforts. You know sometimes when your spouse comes here from a foreign country, everything is strange and new, and they think if they just could go home (especially around christmas), then they .... only remember nice things about home and seem to only be able to see negative things about their new home. Truth is that if she goes home for the summer, she will remember all the reasons she left home in the first place, and she will miss her husband and her home in California. I am sure Chris will make the right decision for his situation, and all you and I can do is give him advice based on our experiences.

[aaron2020 11,651]

Ok oldtimer, I am new, but I have recently went thru the process.

So going through the process makes you an expert?

Not trying to pretend to be a lawyer, but I would NOT suggest using a lawyer anyway with immigration or divorce.

Now, you are a legal expert? What makes you qualify to suggest the OP not use a lawyer for immigration or divorce? Do you know why he is having difficulties? Maybe its something where he might need a lawyer.

Maybe you are right, there is no hurry to AOS anyway, the wife and the stepson are here legally either way, only thing they need the green card for is travel outside the US and employment.

Really? Those are the only two reasons for having a green card?

However consider this, he has already paid because his interview is next month, so he probably paid 3 months ago when he applied, so if he cancels his interview, then he has just thrown over a thousand dollars away (around 1600 if he applied for both at the same time) when he might change his mind over the next few months then have to pay and wait again.

Let's see. Throw out a thousand dollars by stopping the AOS process or go ahead and get them green cards so I can commit myself to repay the US government if my ex-wife and her son gets forbidden benefits? See, a bitter ex-wife would never cause any harm right?

Isn't it better to lose a thousand dollars than to risk losing everything he owns???

------------------

YOU GIVE THE WORST ADVICE EVER!!!!!!!

Edited December 23, 2012 by aaron2020

[Chuck and Diana 1]

So going through the process makes you an expert?

Now, you are a legal expert? What makes you qualify to suggest the OP not use a lawyer for immigration or divorce? Do you know why he is having difficulties? Maybe its something where he might need a lawyer.

Really? Those are the only two reasons for having a green card?

Let's see. Throw out a thousand dollars by stopping the AOS process or go ahead and get them green cards so I can commit myself to repay the US government if my ex-wife and her son gets forbidden benefits? See, a bitter ex-wife would never cause any harm right?

Isn't it better to lose a thousand dollars than to risk losing everything he owns???

------------------

YOU GIVE THE WORST ADVICE EVER!!!!!!!

Aaron ... you are taking my advice pretty personal, you are welcome to give your own competing advice

Just because you have been a member of this website longer doesnt make you an expert either ... Are you a lawyer? Because you sound like one with all your fear mongering ... I dont like lawyers, I think they are all spawns of Satan

I-864 is a guarantee to the government that you will take care of your wife so they dont have to pay her welfare, social security, foodstamps, and other benefits that a Moldovan woman has utterly no clue on how to apply ... benefits that are difficult for Americans to apply for and receive. It is doubtful that she would be approved for those benefits if she was divorced and here on a conditional green card. (Here illegally) I applied for a social security card this year for my wife, they would not issue one with her married name until DHS had updated her name in the system. So from my point of view, even with my help filling out all the paperwork and dealing with the government, simply getting a social security card was pretty difficult. Conditional Green Cards require you to keep your status and your address updated with DHS. Removing conditions requires your USC spouse to participate, its not something the intending immigrant can do by themself.

Chris .. Affadavit of Support should be taken seriously like everyone here has illustrated, but you are the only one that knows your particular situation, and what I mean by that is, only you know your wife and can accurately guess what her intentions are once she has a green card and if you get a divorce after AOS, whether she would go home permanantly (ending your obligation) or try to stay here. If you believe that your wife would try to stay here in the US after the divorce with a conditional green card and somehow successfully apply for government assistance, then maybe Boiler and Aaron are right on the money and I am wrong. Regardless, I hope you make the best decision and everything works out for you.

Aaron ... If your advice is so much better, I suggest you can serve the original poster better by contributing your own advice instead of critizing someone elses ...