PENDING ROC AND THINKING ABOUT DIVORCE

[laylasa 1]

Hey people,

I filed a joint I-751 with my husband in November 2012, have my NOA and bio appointment.

Here is my situation, I have been married to him for 2 years but since day one, things are not changing. I have been emotionally suffering. My husband never lets me do anything alone, like drive, go to school or even work. I had a job, but coz I dont have a drivers licence, he used to drop me but after 2 weeks, he refused to take me and I was fired. During summer, we went to the drivers licence office for me to take a road test but he said that its not happening and renewed my learners permit, and even with this he never lets me drive. We do work together and get paid, but the money goes to his account. I dont have a credit card and the only way to access the money is through him. I cant buy anything I want, its what he wants. Its his way or nothing. I just dont urgue about anything and continue being good but nothing is changing. Right now, Im supposed to travel at home coz there is an emergency, my family is even paying for my ticket and he doesnt want me to go. I dont know what to do. My ROC is pending and I dont know if I have the strength to stay and wait for it. Emotional abuse is bad and painful. I cant even think straight or share anything with him. He embarasses me infront of his family and no one even cares....they talk to me the way they want. Its so bad I cant bear it anymore.

What are my options here? We filed a joint petition. If I file for divorce on irreconcilable differences grounds,what will happen to my ROC? I do have evidence and I sent it with my paperwork. Cant afford an attorney, I dont have a bank account. Guys, what can I do??? Thanks.

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

Don't put up with the abuse any more. You can divorce and file for ROC on your own as long as it was a good faith marriage. There are those on this forum who can advice you on doing that and the process you'll need to go through.

Despite any excuses he has no rights to embarrass you in front of others, refuse you a driver's license, refuse to let you earn a living and have your own money, or not support you in seeing your family.

Don't wait any longer - leave him now, please for your own health and safety. I remember my ex-husband started out this way and ended up becoming physical. The scars from both abuses took a very long time to heal.

[Darnell 8,478]

since the ROC has already been filed,

if you file for divorce please remember that

when you have your interview for ROC without him

you will have to file the divorce waiver RIGHT THERE with the intervewing officer.

[Cool1 0]

Get evidence of all the abuse. If its verbal abuse use a recorder

[bigdog 376]

See the legal aid at the court house to assist you with filing. Good Luck.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Get evidence of all the abuse. If its verbal abuse use a recorder

This is illegal in some states.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Well its up to you. Do you want to stay in the US? If not, when you return to your home country for the emergency, stay there and don't come back. You can hand over your greencard and everything will be okay.

If you want to stay in the US, you might want to leave him BEFORE you leave the house. If you have some where to go, and somewhere to store your belongings while you're back in your home country. Otherwise when you return he may have destroyed your things and disposed of them.

Collect evidence of relationship before you go too so he doesn't get rid of it.

[laylasa 1]

Thanks everyone.

Vanessa, I dont have a place to store my belongings and I want to come back here. I have all the evidence for 2 years to prove my marriage was genuine.

How long can I stay back home before I come back. Like 2 months? I need to clear my mind. Im in Tennessee and I dont even know where to start to file for divorce. Who knows how long the separation period is supposed to be? And if i come back and live in another state, what will happen? Im so confused but Im trying my best to hold on and avoid confrontations. Thanks y'all for your help.