SEPARATED AFTER 4 YEARS OF MARRIAGE

[RichelRichel 1]

I really need some inputs about my status right now.

I've been married for the past 4 yrs with a US Citizen and just last September 17, 2012 my husband moved out of our house. We've had a very rough marriage I should say since the beginning. We have a 2-yr-old son and currently we split the week for parenting time.

He filed for divorce last September, I'm assuming around the same time when he moved out but apparently he did not serve me. I am aware that after 3 months since you filed for it, it will expire so I think I have to do it myself just don't have the money at the moment. I'm basically living on payday-to-payday basis.

What do I expect on my divorce case? I have debts that are in my name for example credit cards acquired during our marriage, car loans, and right now I'm paying for everything from house rent and utilities and not a single penny from my ex husband.

Any suggestions, ideas, opinions, comments, criticism, and anything sort of thoughts for me are greatly appreciated. Thank you everyone.

[pieroot 43]

You can file for divorce and ask for a fee waiver when you file. Start the divorce petition so that you can ask for child support payments and get free legal aid so that they can divide up the debt that was accumulated by both of you during your marriage.

[RichelRichel 1]

You can file for divorce and ask for a fee waiver when you file. Start the divorce petition so that you can ask for child support payments and get free legal aid so that they can divide up the debt that was accumulated by both of you during your marriage.

thanks for your input. i have another questions, do you think i am entitled to get a support from him? Someone told me about him being my sponsor for being here in US. I'm not really sure what that person is talking about. Just a thought.

[Tygrys 143]

thanks for your input. i have another questions, do you think i am entitled to get a support from him? Someone told me about him being my sponsor for being here in US. I'm not really sure what that person is talking about. Just a thought.

With all due respect, this is DIY immigration site, not a family law site.

You need a divorce lawyer to answer your questions about divorce, alimony, child support and asset distribution.

[Ryan H 3,812]

Moved to Effects of Major Family Changes forum.

Edited December 9, 2012 by Ryan H

[reese1 68]

If you are trying to do anything besides a non-contested divorce and there is a child involved I highly recommend you contact an attorney. Do a search for non-profit organizations in your area that will assist you for free or at a discounted rate.

[rlogan 2,036]

I really need some inputs about my status right now.

I've been married for the past 4 yrs with a US Citizen and just last September 17, 2012 my husband moved out of our house. We've had a very rough marriage I should say since the beginning. We have a 2-yr-old son and currently we split the week for parenting time.

He filed for divorce last September, I'm assuming around the same time when he moved out but apparently he did not serve me. I am aware that after 3 months since you filed for it, it will expire so I think I have to do it myself just don't have the money at the moment. I'm basically living on payday-to-payday basis.

What do I expect on my divorce case? I have debts that are in my name for example credit cards acquired during our marriage, car loans, and right now I'm paying for everything from house rent and utilities and not a single penny from my ex husband.

Any suggestions, ideas, opinions, comments, criticism, and anything sort of thoughts for me are greatly appreciated. Thank you everyone.

You can look up your state laws on divorce/dissolution, and see the filing forms so that you have some familiarity with it. I'd be amazed if you could file for divorce without notice to the other person. You have to either serve them the papers or if they have vanished you publish it in a newspaper of record.

Generally speaking half the assets acquired while you are together and half the debts are yours and his equally, but in cases where you take full custody that can vary. You can do just about anything you want if you both agree to it. The best thing is not to fight over the divorce, but come to a mutual agreement because if you fight the only people that win are the lawyers.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

I really need some inputs about my status right now.

I've been married for the past 4 yrs with a US Citizen and just last September 17, 2012 my husband moved out of our house. We've had a very rough marriage I should say since the beginning. We have a 2-yr-old son and currently we split the week for parenting time.

He filed for divorce last September, I'm assuming around the same time when he moved out but apparently he did not serve me. I am aware that after 3 months since you filed for it, it will expire so I think I have to do it myself just don't have the money at the moment. I'm basically living on payday-to-payday basis.

What do I expect on my divorce case? I have debts that are in my name for example credit cards acquired during our marriage, car loans, and right now I'm paying for everything from house rent and utilities and not a single penny from my ex husband.

Any suggestions, ideas, opinions, comments, criticism, and anything sort of thoughts for me are greatly appreciated. Thank you everyone.

You are the female and according to your flag, from the Philippines. You cannot file, he needs to file if you want your divorce able to be recognised in the Philippines (with a lot of money and paperwork).

Debts depend on your state laws (your lawyer will explain it to you but basically they can be split, or if it's solely your debt it can be left to you). Divorce fees depends on your lawyer and again your state laws. There are cases with the other party sharing legal fees but that is situation dependent. Most often you can find places where the first consultation (appointment) is free. You can request support but length of marriage dictate that. The I-864 isn't relevant with divorce.

You can request support of the household bills (say the mortgage/rent) while the divorce is processing but that might not happen...

Long story short - you NEED to get a lawyer. You said he filed 3 months ago, are you sure he isn't trying to have you served by having a notice put in the paper? while it's not strictly legal (if he knows where you are he's supposed to have you physically served), you need a lawyer to look into it to find out what is going on. Get him to have you served to get the process started.

Edited December 8, 2012 by Vanessa&Tony

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

You are the female and according to your flag, from the Philippines. You cannot file, he needs to file if you want your divorce able to be recognised in the Philippines (with a lot of money and paperwork).

Debts depend on your state laws (your lawyer will explain it to you but basically they can be split, or if it's solely your debt it can be left to you). Divorce fees depends on your lawyer and again your state laws. There are cases with the other party sharing legal fees but that is situation dependent. Most often you can find places where the first consultation (appointment) is free. You can request support but length of marriage dictate that. The I-864 isn't relevant with divorce.

You can request support of the household bills (say the mortgage/rent) while the divorce is processing but that might not happen...

Long story short - you NEED to get a lawyer. You said he filed 3 months ago, are you sure he isn't trying to have you served by having a notice put in the paper? while it's not strictly legal (if he knows where you are he's supposed to have you physically served), you need a lawyer to look into it to find out what is going on. Get him to have you served to get the process started.

Where did the OP say they wanted the divorce recognized in the Philippines?

It seems to me she can file in the US and quite easily become a divorced person. I get nothing from her information that indicates she plans to return to PI, let alone care what the authorities in that country think of her marital status.

Also, there is a child involved. There WILL be law that speaks to financial support of that child. There will likely be a formula which takes into account the wages of both parties. This will have nothing to do with spousal support, which in some states is an archaic concept, especially in marriages of short duration.

Edited December 9, 2012 by Rebecca Jo

[Enigma11561 336]

I am sorry to hear this sad news. It happens. It seems that you have been going through a tough time for awhile now. Perhaps this divorce may be the best for both of you if there is no chance of getting back together.

First, although it has not been mentioned, you have your 10 year GC so immigration will not play a role in this.

As others have said, you need to get a lawyer and there are places to go where these services are offered to those with limited money.Your husband WILL be responsible for some type of child support and he may be responsible for some alimony as well. It depends on the laws of your state.

Whoever files first sets the stage. You can file for abandonment. He left you. And you can request financial support. You really do not know if he did file or not. You have received nothing. But you cannot sit on this.Get some legal advice now.

[reese1 68]

Where did the OP say they wanted the divorce recognized in the Philippines?

It seems to me she can file in the US and quite easily become a divorced person. I get nothing from her information that indicates she plans to return to PI, let alone care what the authorities in that country think of her marital status.

Also, there is a child involved. There WILL be law that speaks to financial support of that child. There will likely be a formula which takes into account the wages of both parties.(Yep, it does and it is also based on the number of overnight stays each party has based on custody) This will have nothing to do with spousal support, which in some states is an archaic concept, especially in marriages of short duration. (Some states only give alimony after 7 years of marriage so OP may not qualify for this)

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Where did the OP say they wanted the divorce recognized in the Philippines?

It seems to me she can file in the US and quite easily become a divorced person. I get nothing from her information that indicates she plans to return to PI, let alone care what the authorities in that country think of her marital status.

Also, there is a child involved. There WILL be law that speaks to financial support of that child. There will likely be a formula which takes into account the wages of both parties. This will have nothing to do with spousal support, which in some states is an archaic concept, especially in marriages of short duration.

The OP is FROM the Philippines. She may one day want to marry someone at home, or marry someone again. If she does so, whether here or in PI she will be considered a bigamist in PI which could mean she'll never be able to safely return to her home country (even for a visit if someone is spiteful enough). Is this something she's worried about now? Probably not, but you never know where life will take you and it's best, if she can, to not burn that bridge.

Of course there will be child support, that's a given, but the percentage depends on your state. Spousal support is unlikely given the short period of the marriage but they may order some sort of assistance with the house until the divorce is final and the assets distributed.

Edited December 9, 2012 by Vanessa&Tony

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

The OP is FROM the Philippines. She may one day want to marry someone at home, or marry someone again. If she does so, whether here or in PI she will be considered a bigamist in PI which could mean she'll never be able to safely return to her home country (even for a visit if someone is spiteful enough). Is this something she's worried about now? Probably not, but you never know where life will take you and it's best, if she can, to not burn that bridge.

According to this, as long as the US citizen files for the divorce, then the OP is fine. I think I see what you are saying though.

http://www.hg.org/article.asp?id=20090

The above rule, however, admits of exceptions. One exception when divorce can be recognized in the Philippines is in cases of mixed marriages or marriages between a Filipino and a foreigner. In such cases, the foreign spouse may avail of divorce from his own country or from any other country which his own State will recognize. This is anchored on the 2nd paragraph of Article 26 of the Family Code of the Philippines which provides that “Where a marriage between a Filipino citizen and a foreigner is validly celebrated and a divorce is thereafter validly obtained abroad by the alien spouse capacitating him or her to remarry, the Filipino spouse shall have capacity to remarry under Philippine law.”

Edited December 9, 2012 by Rebecca Jo

[VanessaTony 3,567]

According to this, as long as the US citizen files for the divorce, then the OP is fine.

http://www.hg.org/article.asp?id=20090

The above rule, however, admits of exceptions. One exception when divorce can be recognized in the Philippines is in cases of mixed marriages or marriages between a Filipino and a foreigner. In such cases, the foreign spouse may avail of divorce from his own country or from any other country which his own State will recognize. This is anchored on the 2nd paragraph of Article 26 of the Family Code of the Philippines which provides that “Where a marriage between a Filipino citizen and a foreigner is validly celebrated and a divorce is thereafter validly obtained abroad by the alien spouse capacitating him or her to remarry, the Filipino spouse shall have capacity to remarry under Philippine law.”

I know.. that's why I said he has to file, and not her.

[Mufmer 24]

I really need some inputs about my status right now.

I've been married for the past 4 yrs with a US Citizen and just last September 17, 2012 my husband moved out of our house. We've had a very rough marriage I should say since the beginning. We have a 2-yr-old son and currently we split the week for parenting time.

He filed for divorce last September, I'm assuming around the same time when he moved out but apparently he did not serve me. I am aware that after 3 months since you filed for it, it will expire so I think I have to do it myself just don't have the money at the moment. I'm basically living on payday-to-payday basis.

What do I expect on my divorce case? I have debts that are in my name for example credit cards acquired during our marriage, car loans, and right now I'm paying for everything from house rent and utilities and not a single penny from my ex husband.

Any suggestions, ideas, opinions, comments, criticism, and anything sort of thoughts for me are greatly appreciated. Thank you everyone.

FIRST OF ALL IT SEEMS U BOTH WERE LOOKING SO HAPPY WHEN I SAW UR PICS, BUT IAM SORRY FOR THE CURRENT SITUATION, I PERFER U TO GET LEGAL ADVISE REGARDING.

Thanx.