Failed Marriage/Marriage Fraud Suspected

[aNEWchapter 1]

It is with great sadness that I post today. I want to warn american women of the high rate of marriage fraud from Morocan men. We met on FB in 2010. I traveled to Morocco and stayed about a month. We went through this long hard process of K1 Visa. We married in May 2011 and now...... He is in jail for domestic abuse and pretrial violation. In hindsight, I see there were things I should have been more mindful of. However, I allowed my love and attraction overcome my intuition. PLEASE listen to your intuition if something doesn't feel right. I wil share my experience here in hopes that I can help prevent other women in USA to endure the heart ache, stress that comes with a marriage that is not based on love, respect honor, etc but instead is a way for a moroccan to come to the usa to work and send money back to his family. I now understand that such impoverished people do desperate things to have a better life and help improve the lives of the family living back in morocco. I will post my story shortly in hopes you bring awareness to american women who plan to marry a Moroccan man. Until I can get back here to post my story I want to leave you with this...PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION AND DO WHAT EVER IT TAKES TO REALLY GET TO KNOW THE MAN WITH WHOM YOU ARE INVOLVED.

[Golden Gate 530]

I am sorry that has happened to you, and for sure people need to be have open eyes when they are going to marry anyone. However, I would be careful about generalizing about Moroccans based on your experience.

Edited December 4, 2012 by Golden Gate

[reese1 68]

This happens all the time and not just with Moroccan men. Men and women should make sure they know who they are dealing with before they get married and listen to their intuition, regardless of their nationality.

[dwheels76 5,468]

Thank you for being so brave to want to warn and tell your story. I pray you are now safe and not in danger. Please take care of you.

[Fight for Love 98]

i'm so sorry you been thru all of this =(

god bless u!!!

[Tygrys 143]

I'm sorry for your experience, but problem of failed marriage is definitely not limited to Moroccan men, or even men in general.

[aNEWchapter 1]

Please know that it is not my intention to "generalize" the Moroccan men. I know this happens in all cultures. However, what I have discovered is there is a very high incidence of marriage fraud among the moroccan population compared to other cultures.

Ways to avoid being a Target:

Learn the language

Learn about the Moroccan economy and how it affects families there.

Pay close attention to these red flags- Do not let them go without resolution....

Claiming an Undying love for you shortly after you meet.

Proposing marriage shortly after they meet you.

Inconsistencies in their life story.

Family being overly generous with gifts and entertainment (beyond there obvious means to pay for such things)

Quick to show frustration when things do not go as they want in regarding to planing your future life together.

[destiny64 222]

Families in Morocco help each other financially, but he should have been helping your household first. As for domestic abuse there is no excuse for that, but men all over the world are guilty of that crime also. Family dynamics are a lot different in Morocco than here , and the job situation is very undesirable. Family members who come to the states do send money home to help their parents out , but it shouldn't be a lot since the cost of living is so low. I insist my husband sends money to his mother when he is here , she is old and she don't have retirement. He helps her now , why shouldn't he help her once he is living here?

I'm sure your full story will shed some light , and I hope that you overcome this terrible event in your life. Best wishes and I pray he is out of your life soon.

[zahrasalem 114]

Sorry this has happened in your life, but please stop insisting that Morocco has a higher fraud rate than any other country. My husband is not from Morocco, but generalizing about nationalities and cultures is SO wrong on so many levels.

Also please fill in your information, otherwise you can be viewed as a troll.

best wishes...

Edited December 5, 2012 by zahrasalem

[rade2rising 205]

no wonder casablanca embassy is so hard to get through bcoz most times embassy officials know more about the relations than the petitioner. very sad truth it is. but yea this goes for all countries not just morocco.

[aNEWchapter 1]

Destiny64

Thank you for your feedback. I want to explain that I thought it an attribute that he was so committed to his family as to send money home. I supported him in helping his family. The problem is he contributed very little to our household. I make good money a do not need his financial support. He would lie about sending funds home even after I explained I had no problem with him doing that. He opened a private checking account, he would lie about his money. I would find receipts from western union. when I asked him about it he would get very angry.

I am accountable for my part in this as I tried to look beyond his actions and see the fear and feeling of scarcity that was driving him. I constantly made excuses for his unacceptable behaviors He isolated us. We had no friends. He was disrespectful to complete strangers and never stood accountable for his inappropriate conduct. I thought it was a period of adjustment and it would get better. It only got worse. He had relationship with other women on the internet. He worked as much as he could so when he was home it was spend on the computer. He never really engaged in our relationship. He would pray 5 times a day, yet he would verbally abuse me calling me terrible things. Ultimately he became physically abusive, yet continued to pray and justified his actions or completely forgot an event had happened. One of the things I do not understand is the incongurent behaviors Claiming his faith and a being a good Muslim yet disrespecting people and leaving a wake of hurt in his path of misconduct. If you are going to go to all the trouble to get here you should definitely not bite the hand that feeds you.

The reason I post here is that I started to look into marriage fraud and found so many similar storiesof moroccan marriage fraud that I felt it warranted an effort to bring awareness to others who might be susceptible or potential targets to this type of crime.

[destiny64 222]

Sorry this has happened in your life, but please stop insisting that Morocco has a higher fraud rate than any other country. My husband is not from Morocco, but generalizing about nationalities and cultures is SO wrong on so many levels.

Also please fill in your information, otherwise you can be viewed as a troll.

best wishes...

LOL, what's a troll?

[aNEWchapter 1]

Sorry this has happened in your life, but please stop insisting that Morocco has a higher fraud rate than any other country. My husband is not from Morocco, but generalizing about nationalities and cultures is SO wrong on so many levels.

Also please fill in your information, otherwise you can be viewed as a troll.

best wishes...

In my recent research I find that Morocco is known to be a counrty of high risk for marriage fraud, that is why it is so difficult to get through the consulate. I am not generalizing, just stating what I have learned through this process.

Also, I am not a troll just haven't had time to complete a new profile. I am known as Adams. Michelle, a long time vj member, My husband hacked this account (as well as others) and now I can not get in to my adams.michelle account.

Some how I am surprised that in my attempt to give information in hopes of helping others has turned in to a "Generalization Topic".

[destiny64 222]

Destiny64

Thank you for your feedback. I want to explain that I thought it an attribute that he was so committed to his family as to send money home. I supported him in helping his family. The problem is he contributed very little to our household. I make good money a do not need his financial support. He would lie about sending funds home even after I explained I had no problem with him doing that. He opened a private checking account, he would lie about his money. I would find receipts from western union. when I asked him about it he would get very angry.

I am accountable for my part in this as I tried to look beyond his actions and see the fear and feeling of scarcity that was driving him. I constantly made excuses for his unacceptable behaviors He isolated us. We had no friends. He was disrespectful to complete strangers and never stood accountable for his inappropriate conduct. I thought it was a period of adjustment and it would get better. It only got worse. He had relationship with other women on the internet. He worked as much as he could so when he was home it was spend on the computer. He never really engaged in our relationship. He would pray 5 times a day, yet he would verbally abuse me calling me terrible things. Ultimately he became physically abusive, yet continued to pray and justified his actions or completely forgot an event had happened. One of the things I do not understand is the incongurent behaviors Claiming his faith and a being a good Muslim yet disrespecting people and leaving a wake of hurt in his path of misconduct. If you are going to go to all the trouble to get here you should definitely not bite the hand that feeds you.

The reason I post here is that I started to look into marriage fraud and found so many similar storiesof moroccan marriage fraud that I felt it warranted an effort to bring awareness to others who might be susceptible or potential targets to this type of crime.

Not sure if I would call this marriage fraud or not , I think you just got a bad egg. Was he ever affectionate towards you at any point, it doesn't seem as though you mentioned that at all? As for claiming he's a good Muslim, he may believe that he is. However I see many Christians following the same personality as your husband , so it really isn't a matter of religion , its a moral issue. Many personality disorders might be overlooked in the honeymoon stage, as your caught up in an emotional whirlwind. Especially when dealing with a long distance relationship , its good to communicate everything you possibly can to determine if you are on the same wave length about money, family, etc.... It would be good to get more background on your beginning than your end to have a feel of whether or not this was intentional fraud or that you just didn't know him well enough to see that he was

bad news.

[aNEWchapter 1]

This will be my final post about this matter and it comes straight from United States Diplomatic Missions to Morocco. This post took on a direction of its own. My only intent was to give information that I have learned from my experience and share it with others who share the same communication board I did as I moved through the K-1 process. If it does not apply to you GREAT, but if it resonates in any way then I just hope you listen to your intuition and take what your read from my post that is helpful and leave the rest.

Love and Light, Michelle

Internet Romance and Marriage Fraud

Many Americans befriend Moroccans through Internet dating and social networking sites and these relationships often lead to marriage or engagement. While many of the marriages between Americans and Moroccans are successful, the U.S. Consulate General in Casablanca warns against marriage fraud. It is not uncommon for foreign Moroccan nationals to enter into marriages with Americans solely for immigration purposes. Relationships developed via correspondence, particularly those begun on the Internet, are especially susceptible to manipulation. Often, the marriages end in divorce in the United States when the foreign national acquires legal permanent residence (“green card”) or U.S. citizenship. In some cases, the new American or permanent resident then remarries a wife he divorced before, around the same time as entering into a relationship with a sponsoring American citizen.

Some of the signs that an Internet contact may be developing a relationship with an American in order to obtain an immigrant visa through marriage are:

• Declarations of love within days or weeks of the initial contact;
• Proposals or discussions of marriage soon after initial contact;
• Requests to the American to visit the foreign national’s home country soon after the declaration of love or proposal;
• Responses to messages from the American friend are along the lines “I love you/Sorry I missed your call,” or similarly one-sided conversations;
• Once engaged, married, or an immigrant visa petition is filed, suddenly starts missing scheduled appointments to chat or call.

While chat rooms, dating and social networking sites are great ways to make friends across international borders, the U.S. government urges Americans who meet foreign nationals on the Internet to take the time necessary to get to know them well before considering marriage and to keep in mind the signs noted above. Entering into a marriage contract for the principal purpose of facilitating immigration to the United States for an alien is against U.S. law and can result in serious penalties, including fines and imprisonment for the American citizen and the foreign national involved.

I was the perfect target. Lesson learned and I hope my experience may help another.