losing my mind?????

[alexbrixie 3]

I married in 2010. I have a step daughter which caused paperwork delay because father wouldnt sign for us to take her, hes only seen her once and she is 6, he asked for 1,000,000 baht to sign. anyway, ive overcome that with a court order. I just returned from thailand for the 7th time empty handed and my visa hasnt reached noa2 yet. Upon return Ive had ringing in my ears that hasnt gone away, specialist said hearing damage, which i cant recall an incident. I have a lump in my throat which specialist said doesnt exist, acid reflux. ive been breaking out in hives on my back, specialist says from stress. cannot sleep, cannot eat. i bought a house 5 months ago and havnt moved in because i cant look at the toys i bought for my daughter or things i bought for my wife. I havnt been inside in 2 weeks. meanwhile i sent my wife back to her village to spend the last 6 months or so with family before she comes to usa. wife is pissed because shes going to bathroom in a hole again. so i just moved them into a civilized home close to her mom. im losing my mind racing against time. my grandparents are dying begging for me to get them here to see them one time before they die. My sales income has dropped 20%. I need something to happen. cant look st uscis website anymore and tired of looking at other people timelines, im losing hope.

[rade2rising 205]

umm you just filed on 8/30 right???

you need to relax. easier said than done yes but if you don't you might not me be here when they do come. the waiting is very hard for everyone involved in the process. And you going to be waiting at least another 5 to 6 months most likely.

[Louza 10]

You need to calm down & hang in there. This process is a stressful one & you will need to be patient throughout it all.

Good luck

[Darnell 8,478]

start a winter garden, tend to it daily.

and EXERCISE !

whilst yer at it, get into toastmasters guild , local chapter, and help out the newbies.

[alexbrixie 3]

start a winter garden, tend to it daily.

and EXERCISE !

whilst yer at it, get into toastmasters guild , local chapter, and help out the newbies.

I did plant some raSpberry plants last week. I am in chicago so winter will be unleashed soon, theyre wont be anything to tend to, my yard will be buried.

[Darnell 8,478]

well, my point is, really -

you need to do something else.

exercise, daily, helps loads - your body likes it, helps to reduce stress, and you can get a good sleep each night when you exercise.

but there are other things you can do, along with exercise, to fill the time.

BUT - IMO - when yer lass arrives, and you are HEALTHY - that's the best thing...

[Ning 619]

I married in 2010. I have a step daughter which caused paperwork delay because father wouldnt sign for us to take her, hes only seen her once and she is 6, he asked for 1,000,000 baht to sign. anyway, ive overcome that with a court order. I just returned from thailand for the 7th time empty handed and my visa hasnt reached noa2 yet. Upon return Ive had ringing in my ears that hasnt gone away, specialist said hearing damage, which i cant recall an incident. I have a lump in my throat which specialist said doesnt exist, acid reflux. ive been breaking out in hives on my back, specialist says from stress. cannot sleep, cannot eat. i bought a house 5 months ago and havnt moved in because i cant look at the toys i bought for my daughter or things i bought for my wife. I havnt been inside in 2 weeks. meanwhile i sent my wife back to her village to spend the last 6 months or so with family before she comes to usa. wife is pissed because shes going to bathroom in a hole again. so i just moved them into a civilized home close to her mom. im losing my mind racing against time. my grandparents are dying begging for me to get them here to see them one time before they die. My sales income has dropped 20%. I need something to happen. cant look st uscis website anymore and tired of looking at other people timelines, im losing hope.

You must have had some reasons for waiting the two years to begin the process of bringing them here. That time added to the present need to wait to be with your famiy has added additional stress to your life I think. Now when you look down the road and find it difficult to see the end. I can tell you from my own experiance it does end or at least make a turn toward the future you have in mind.

I was married for more than a year before my husband filed. My case took 408 days. We had to deal with a childs visa as well. I know its tough. I know it seems like it wont happen. I lived in my mothers Thai style home in the country village. Then again I had lived that life for all my life and I knew my time with my family would become a memory.

Your wife isnt a child. She needs you to prepare everything as best you can to be ready for she and her ( your ) child to come to America. She needs to see the strength in you that will be required for all of you to succeed here. She will experiance a different type of separation and stress than she ever had before.

Turn your thoughts to the future. Stay on the road while preparing for the turns up ahead. You have a lot to do that should occupy your time in a positive way. Move into that house. Go to your daughters school to find out exactly what it will take to get her enrolled. Stop doing the things that cause you to feel as you do now. Change everything you are doing that is the source of this stress that you can control. Begin a exercise program which is a huge stress relief. Go to your local community college to find out about ESL classes for your wife. Ask about Pell grants to pay for it. Plan all this with your wife. Get her ready to live a new life here in the USA. Plan with her how she will adapt to American life. There is a lot to do you see.

Your family is counting on you and you can do this. Do not give up or let this beat you.

Edited December 2, 2012 by Ning

[googled 13]

Hang in there buddy. All of us in this forum have been there before. I remember laying in my bed night after night missing her and worrying about everything that might go wrong. It really did me no good to worry, probably hurt things even more by worrying. Everything worked out. We have been here together for over a year now and are expecting our first child.

As other have suggested just try to find something to take your mind off of thinking about the waiting and keep yourself healthy. Everything will work out.