Starting a new life

[LoveLife2 5]

Hello All,

I'm glad I found this site. I was in love and and moved the earth to be with her. She lived in Russia. This was 2006 and we had got our K1 and married 3/17/2007 in US. My Wife became very distant after 2 years and after 3.5 years she moved out of out house with no notice and only a short hand written note. She took our dogs and all she wanted but I didn't care. I just wanted to know why after whe had such a good life together and my family loved her so much too. Anyways, it seems it was she that had things to work out so I tried to make it work but no amount of love could change her. We were officialy divorced in 7/2012 We still talk and actually she wants me to be a big part of her life and be with her again. Sadly, I can't do that as my heart was broken and I feel embarrassed that she took me and my family for granted. I love her and wish her well but I will never trust her again as a Man should trust his Woman.

This brings me to my question. It has been 2 years since our seperation and 7/2012 since the paperwork of divorce. I have dated a few ladies localy in the USA and they were fine but I dated a Fillipio girls and she showed me a whole new culture and life that I never knew. It seems my date was only going to be a friend but through her family I was introduced to another woman with 2 kids still living in Philippines and we have been talking, skyping, writing, email, and regular mail for some time. This Woman has captured my heart and I want to think that maybe we can be together someday if she would have me.

What I would like to know is will I be able to get another K1 if we decide we want to marry or will this be a hard time for both of us. I am a professional man with a very good job and my Ex has a good job with a large State county that I helped get her, plus my ex has a Masters degree so I pay no alimony and we have no kids. My ex and I parted as friends and with the understanding that I pay all of our debt including credit cards. I am doing that and I can afford to.

I hope my blind love for one doesn't stop me from being together with the one I want to be with now. Any advice would greatly be appreciated!!

Thanks all!!

[Tintin and Mike 127]

Congrats on finding another chance with love!

Have you met in person yet? If not, plan to do that 1st and see what that leads you.

Good luck!

[Janelle2002 3,865]

I agree with Tintin and Mike. Definitely go and visit. Make sure you meet family, friends,take photos and visit her house and village. Dont take no for an answer. Let her kids get a feel for you. This is important rather than moving them straight in with someone they have not met in person. This will make their move a lot less stressful.

[Darnell 8,479]

IMBRA regs state its ok for filing 2 I129f's in two years. If more within that span, you'd need to ask for a IMBRA waiver with the NEXT I-129F submittal.

You are way out of the time line for needing an IMBRA waiver, so yer good to go on filing.

Good Luck !

[SteveKarlaMayer 21]

Hello All,

I'm glad I found this site. I was in love and and moved the earth to be with her. She lived in Russia. This was 2006 and we had got our K1 and married 3/17/2007 in US. My Wife became very distant after 2 years and after 3.5 years she moved out of out house with no notice and only a short hand written note. She took our dogs and all she wanted but I didn't care. I just wanted to know why after whe had such a good life together and my family loved her so much too. Anyways, it seems it was she that had things to work out so I tried to make it work but no amount of love could change her. We were officialy divorced in 7/2012 We still talk and actually she wants me to be a big part of her life and be with her again. Sadly, I can't do that as my heart was broken and I feel embarrassed that she took me and my family for granted. I love her and wish her well but I will never trust her again as a Man should trust his Woman.

This brings me to my question. It has been 2 years since our seperation and 7/2012 since the paperwork of divorce. I have dated a few ladies localy in the USA and they were fine but I dated a Fillipio girls and she showed me a whole new culture and life that I never knew. It seems my date was only going to be a friend but through her family I was introduced to another woman with 2 kids still living in Philippines and we have been talking, skyping, writing, email, and regular mail for some time. This Woman has captured my heart and I want to think that maybe we can be together someday if she would have me.

What I would like to know is will I be able to get another K1 if we decide we want to marry or will this be a hard time for both of us. I am a professional man with a very good job and my Ex has a good job with a large State county that I helped get her, plus my ex has a Masters degree so I pay no alimony and we have no kids. My ex and I parted as friends and with the understanding that I pay all of our debt including credit cards. I am doing that and I can afford to.

I hope my blind love for one doesn't stop me from being together with the one I want to be with now. Any advice would greatly be appreciated!!

Thanks all!!

I'm sorry about your past but you should be happy for finding yourself another woman who showed love for you. That's a very good attitude to be able to trust once again and never afraid to explore what love has to offer.

I hope your relationship with this woman will go well and perfect. God bless you both.

[LoveLife2 5]

Sorry VisaJourney Forums, I'm trying to get used to replying to the posts so I hope this posts correctly.

Thank you all for the great advice and we are very serious after many months of seeing each other through Skype,phone,email,etc.. I will travel there soon and had a wonder if that would be good or safe for me as a foreighner in a place that USA says should not be traveled. It is Zamboanga, Philippines. She had assured me that I am safe as her Christian community is stron and that no harm would come. I also seen that the major hotels and such were very nice and provide a comfortable place to stay as a visitor. I do believe that I will not be harmed and I will go see her very soon. If any one has a good flights to Zamboanga and hotels please let me know. I have looked up all ther is so I'm aware of all they have to offer. Whats most important is spending time with her and the boys and letting the kids know me as much as my Girl as I don't want to tramatise the kids if and when we marry and they come to USA..

[jameugiekaxavilon 25]

Sorry that your past relatonship didn't work out but anyways congratulations for finding new one. I wish you the best and lasting love. You can still bring her in the US through K1 visa and marry her as your first k1 already past two years. Mostly USCIS ask for waiver to file second k1 petition when the previous k1 didn't reach two years from the new application.

[TBoneTX 46,276]

*** Thread moved from K-1 Process forum to Philippines regional forum -- OP's initial question has been answered; new questions are country-specific. ***

[Hank_ 9,174]

You will be fine in the Phils, for sure listen to your fiancee while there. And as others have said you will no issue with filing a 2nd K-1.

Relax, enjoy, take your time, don't rush. And... all the best.

[Sunnyland 639]

Hello All,

I'm glad I found this site. I was in love and and moved the earth to be with her. She lived in Russia. This was 2006 and we had got our K1 and married 3/17/2007 in US. My Wife became very distant after 2 years and after 3.5 years she moved out of out house with no notice and only a short hand written note. She took our dogs and all she wanted but I didn't care. I just wanted to know why after whe had such a good life together and my family loved her so much too. Anyways, it seems it was she that had things to work out so I tried to make it work but no amount of love could change her. We were officialy divorced in 7/2012 We still talk and actually she wants me to be a big part of her life and be with her again. Sadly, I can't do that as my heart was broken and I feel embarrassed that she took me and my family for granted. I love her and wish her well but I will never trust her again as a Man should trust his Woman.

This brings me to my question. It has been 2 years since our seperation and 7/2012 since the paperwork of divorce. I have dated a few ladies localy in the USA and they were fine but I dated a Fillipio girls and she showed me a whole new culture and life that I never knew. It seems my date was only going to be a friend but through her family I was introduced to another woman with 2 kids still living in Philippines and we have been talking, skyping, writing, email, and regular mail for some time. This Woman has captured my heart and I want to think that maybe we can be together someday if she would have me.

What I would like to know is will I be able to get another K1 if we decide we want to marry or will this be a hard time for both of us. I am a professional man with a very good job and my Ex has a good job with a large State county that I helped get her, plus my ex has a Masters degree so I pay no alimony and we have no kids. My ex and I parted as friends and with the understanding that I pay all of our debt including credit cards. I am doing that and I can afford to.

I hope my blind love for one doesn't stop me from being together with the one I want to be with now. Any advice would greatly be appreciated!!

Thanks all!!

Sorry for what happened to you in the past. It's great to find love again; I do not know what is the waiting time to apply for another k1 visa but before you rush into a k1 process again, take your time in traveling to see her (unless she can visit you there in US or some other place), meet and get to know well her family, kids, her culture, etc. As other said... try to see where that leads you. Good luck in this new journey!

[rlogan 2,036]

Sorry VisaJourney Forums, I'm trying to get used to replying to the posts so I hope this posts correctly.

Thank you all for the great advice and we are very serious after many months of seeing each other through Skype,phone,email,etc.. I will travel there soon and had a wonder if that would be good or safe for me as a foreighner in a place that USA says should not be traveled. It is Zamboanga, Philippines. She had assured me that I am safe as her Christian community is stron and that no harm would come. I also seen that the major hotels and such were very nice and provide a comfortable place to stay as a visitor. I do believe that I will not be harmed and I will go see her very soon. If any one has a good flights to Zamboanga and hotels please let me know. I have looked up all ther is so I'm aware of all they have to offer. Whats most important is spending time with her and the boys and letting the kids know me as much as my Girl as I don't want to tramatise the kids if and when we marry and they come to USA..

It would be wise to read the history of this area in order to understand the grievances and thereby avoid some big mistakes that could get you killed if you act inappropriately.

Mindanao was Muslim before the Spanish came, and centuries of Spanish rule over the Philippines never subjugated them, except for a few Spanish strongholds. The Lapu-Lapu killed Magellan when he landed to claim the land for Spain and demand tribute from them. Yay, Lapu-Lapu.

Right before the Spanish-American war, Spain was finally acknowledged but in doing so the resources it took broke the back of the Spanish empire. When the US double-crossed General Aguinaldo and seized the Philippines as property instead of independence as promised in 1898, the Moro of Mindanao continued to fight for independence against their new would-be masters. They refused to pay taxes and change their ways for the new empire, and the USA implemented a regime of terrorism, torture and brutal unconscionable massacres of the people. These stories of brutality live on in the minds of many Muslim people on Mindanao, including the Zamboanga region which has deep historical ties to Malaysia and not Spain, the national government, or the USA.

When the Japanese over-ran the Philippines the USA hypocritically promised independence again if Philippines allied itself with America. After defeating the Japanese, numerous strings were attached, like namely occupying numerous military bases and prohibition of producing things that would compete with anything the USA was producing. Filipinos urged the USA to recognize Mindanao's historical independence instead of subjugating them to yet a new national government that was viewed by Moros as a puppet of the USA. But instead they didn't because the Philippines has never been anything more than a tool for the US to exploit to its own ends.

By the 1960's Mindanao was still over 90% muslim and it is important to understand this is not about religion so much as a completely different system of social organization, land ownership, and governance. A Datu presides with a council, and land ownership is not registered with a national office or adjudicated in courts. Rather, it is acknowledged by the Datu and Council, so if claims over land arise it is brought to them for adjudication.

There were rebels all over the Philippines fighting this new national government and one of their primary grievances was land. So the national government came to the New People's Army rebels and others to strike a deal: immigrate to Mindanao, take their land from them with our backing, and leave Luzon and other Northern islands. The Northern Philippines were Catholic, so these immigrants to Mindanao were Christians. The wars which immediately erupted were Christian-Muslim wars, which should be better characterized as immigrant/native landholder wars.

More than 120,000 people have been killed in these wars. The Muslim population was eventually reduced to about 20% of the Mindano population, concentrated in enclaves that finally became the ARMM: Autonomous Region of Muslim Mindanao. The Moro National Liberation Front (MNLF) was the primary armed resistance responsible for that political settlement. But many were dissatisfied with the settlement, rightly pointing to the lack of real sovereignty over resources and the corrupt system established of handing money and political power from the national government to local leaders. So the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) continued armed resistance. The MILF and the government have recently reached a settlement though, which is going to change the nature of the Autonomous Region of Muslim Mindanao.

Zamboanga is not part of the ARMM, but you have to recognize the Muslim influence and history of the surrounding area in order to conduct yourself in a manner that does not bring on your assassination. We have had idiotic peacocks on this forum that thought they could walk into such a place with an air of superiority and arrogance, showing off in exactly the wrong ways: I'm the rich american come to deflower your virgins, drink, insult your culture and remind you my grandfathers tortured your grandfathers, burned their villages, and seized their lands for Dole Philippines.

The Christian immigrants are of course allied with the USA and the national government because that is who backed them in taking Mindanao land. This history is not taught in the Christian immigrant schools generally because that would mean recognizing the legitimacy of the Muslim land claims. So you have the young generation just thinking Muslims are crazy people with no grievances.

There are some real crazies to worry about though, namely Abu-Sayyef. The US World Trade Center was bombed twice by Abu Sayyef. The first was Ramzi Yousef, with a truck bomb in 1993. The second was his Uncle Shiek Khalid Mohammed, the mastermind of 9/11. The USA doesn't want you to know that when Ramzi Yousef was captured by the Philippine National Police, his uncle escaped to meet with Osama Bin Laden to finish a plot they were already working on with mass airplane attacks called the Bojinka plot. The reason they don't want you to know is that the whole plot was on Ramzi Yousef's computer that was seized in the Philippines. The explosives they were working on caught fire, which brought the fire department and then the police. Yousef was captured but Khalid Mohammed escaped, with the US knowing full well he was intent on hijacking airplanes to attack the USA. When Condoleeza Rice said they had no idea planes would be hijacked, it was a monumental lie.

So it is important you understand this hatred of America by Abu Sayyef is what caused both World Trade Center Bombings. They are active in Zamboanga and would only be too happy to cut your head off and mount it on a pike. They are basically a criminal extortion enterprise, kidnapping for ransom, running "protection" rackets, etc. They blew up a ferry killing over 100 people in 2004, and have blown up other ferries, bridges, hijacked busses, kidnapped tourists - just a lovely group.

Keep a low profile. Stay with your friends and family at all times. Be aware of your surroundings. Respect the culture of the Muslims. Many of them are long past their historical grievances, but many will also look at you as representing centuries of oppression, brutality, and injustice. Generally the way the assassinations have been working in the Philippines is by motorcycle, with a driver racing up and the passenger doing the shooting, then disappearing never to be found. Steve Kindy was assassinated on a Jeepney by a Marawi in 2010 despite being there specifically to help orphans of the Muslim-Christian war. The assailant was also never caught.

In terms of your fiance/girlfriend, it is imperitive that you go there and stay as long as you can in order to really understand who she is. I lived for several months on the edge of the Autonomous Region of Muslim Mindanao and built a house there. The bridge closest to us was blown up, the grocery store we shopped at blown up, hand grenade thrown into a crowd of the busiest intersection in the city, just a very long list of violence and it is the same city Steve Kindy was assassinated in. (Iligan). But in living there with her family for months I knew everything about her. We didn't meet on the internet. I had been all over the Philippines many times before meeting her there and was immune to all the girls throwing themselves at me by the time we met. You, on the other hand, are going to see some stunning youngsters trying to unseat your current girlfriend. Zamboanga City was a Spanish port and seat of colonial government historically. The mixture of Spanish/Filipino blood produces some of the most spectacularly beautiful girls on the planet, so you are going to be the hot commoddity in the capital of babe city.

[B_J 2,752]

It would be wise to read the history of this area in order to understand the grievances and thereby avoid some big mistakes that could get you killed if you act inappropriately.

Mindanao was Muslim before the Spanish came, and centuries of Spanish rule over the Philippines never subjugated them, except for a few Spanish strongholds. The Lapu-Lapu killed Magellan when he landed to claim the land for Spain and demand tribute from them. Yay, Lapu-Lapu.

Right before the Spanish-American war, Spain was finally acknowledged but in doing so the resources it took broke the back of the Spanish empire. When the US double-crossed General Aguinaldo and seized the Philippines as property instead of independence as promised in 1898, the Moro of Mindanao continued to fight for independence against their new would-be masters. They refused to pay taxes and change their ways for the new empire, and the USA implemented a regime of terrorism, torture and brutal unconscionable massacres of the people. These stories of brutality live on in the minds of many Muslim people on Mindanao, including the Zamboanga region which has deep historical ties to Malaysia and not Spain, the national government, or the USA.

When the Japanese over-ran the Philippines the USA hypocritically promised independence again if Philippines allied itself with America. After defeating the Japanese, numerous strings were attached, like namely occupying numerous military bases and prohibition of producing things that would compete with anything the USA was producing. Filipinos urged the USA to recognize Mindanao's historical independence instead of subjugating them to yet a new national government that was viewed by Moros as a puppet of the USA. But instead they didn't because the Philippines has never been anything more than a tool for the US to exploit to its own ends.

By the 1960's Mindanao was still over 90% muslim and it is important to understand this is not about religion so much as a completely different system of social organization, land ownership, and governance. A Datu presides with a council, and land ownership is not registered with a national office or adjudicated in courts. Rather, it is acknowledged by the Datu and Council, so if claims over land arise it is brought to them for adjudication.

There were rebels all over the Philippines fighting this new national government and one of their primary grievances was land. So the national government came to the New People's Army rebels and others to strike a deal: immigrate to Mindanao, take their land from them with our backing, and leave Luzon and other Northern islands. The Northern Philippines were Catholic, so these immigrants to Mindanao were Christians. The wars which immediately erupted were Christian-Muslim wars, which should be better characterized as immigrant/native landholder wars.

More than 120,000 people have been killed in these wars. The Muslim population was eventually reduced to about 20% of the Mindano population, concentrated in enclaves that finally became the ARMM: Autonomous Region of Muslim Mindanao. The Moro National Liberation Front (MNLF) was the primary armed resistance responsible for that political settlement. But many were dissatisfied with the settlement, rightly pointing to the lack of real sovereignty over resources and the corrupt system established of handing money and political power from the national government to local leaders. So the Moro Islamic Liberation Front (MILF) continued armed resistance. The MILF and the government have recently reached a settlement though, which is going to change the nature of the Autonomous Region of Muslim Mindanao.

Zamboanga is not part of the ARMM, but you have to recognize the Muslim influence and history of the surrounding area in order to conduct yourself in a manner that does not bring on your assassination. We have had idiotic peacocks on this forum that thought they could walk into such a place with an air of superiority and arrogance, showing off in exactly the wrong ways: I'm the rich american come to deflower your virgins, drink, insult your culture and remind you my grandfathers tortured your grandfathers, burned their villages, and seized their lands for Dole Philippines.

The Christian immigrants are of course allied with the USA and the national government because that is who backed them in taking Mindanao land. This history is not taught in the Christian immigrant schools generally because that would mean recognizing the legitimacy of the Muslim land claims. So you have the young generation just thinking Muslims are crazy people with no grievances.

There are some real crazies to worry about though, namely Abu-Sayyef. The US World Trade Center was bombed twice by Abu Sayyef. The first was Ramzi Yousef, with a truck bomb in 1993. The second was his Uncle Shiek Khalid Mohammed, the mastermind of 9/11. The USA doesn't want you to know that when Ramzi Yousef was captured by the Philippine National Police, his uncle escaped to meet with Osama Bin Laden to finish a plot they were already working on with mass airplane attacks called the Bojinka plot. The reason they don't want you to know is that the whole plot was on Ramzi Yousef's computer that was seized in the Philippines. The explosives they were working on caught fire, which brought the fire department and then the police. Yousef was captured but Khalid Mohammed escaped, with the US knowing full well he was intent on hijacking airplanes to attack the USA. When Condoleeza Rice said they had no idea planes would be hijacked, it was a monumental lie.

So it is important you understand this hatred of America by Abu Sayyef is what caused both World Trade Center Bombings. They are active in Zamboanga and would only be too happy to cut your head off and mount it on a pike. They are basically a criminal extortion enterprise, kidnapping for ransom, running "protection" rackets, etc. They blew up a ferry killing over 100 people in 2004, and have blown up other ferries, bridges, hijacked busses, kidnapped tourists - just a lovely group.

Keep a low profile. Stay with your friends and family at all times. Be aware of your surroundings. Respect the culture of the Muslims. Many of them are long past their historical grievances, but many will also look at you as representing centuries of oppression, brutality, and injustice. Generally the way the assassinations have been working in the Philippines is by motorcycle, with a driver racing up and the passenger doing the shooting, then disappearing never to be found. Steve Kindy was assassinated on a Jeepney by a Marawi in 2010 despite being there specifically to help orphans of the Muslim-Christian war. The assailant was also never caught.

In terms of your fiance/girlfriend, it is imperitive that you go there and stay as long as you can in order to really understand who she is. I lived for several months on the edge of the Autonomous Region of Muslim Mindanao and built a house there. The bridge closest to us was blown up, the grocery store we shopped at blown up, hand grenade thrown into a crowd of the busiest intersection in the city, just a very long list of violence and it is the same city Steve Kindy was assassinated in. (Iligan). But in living there with her family for months I knew everything about her. We didn't meet on the internet. I had been all over the Philippines many times before meeting her there and was immune to all the girls throwing themselves at me by the time we met. You, on the other hand, are going to see some stunning youngsters trying to unseat your current girlfriend. Zamboanga City was a Spanish port and seat of colonial government historically. The mixture of Spanish/Filipino blood produces some of the most spectacularly beautiful girls on the planet, so you are going to be the hot commoddity in the capital of babe city.

Excellent post.

[Hank_ 9,174]

Gotta love cut 'n' paste... or not.