More kids with second marriage?

[honeyblonde 0]

Thanks Ladies , I'll keep that in mind!

What, you don't like being called a lady? But you know you're one of the MEAN girls!

[sarah and hicham 3]

What is so unfortunate is that young women with age prejudices don't seem to realize is that one day, if they don't die soon, they will be us. They also don't realize that it doesn't take long to age over 40, or that there is a negative perception in society of women over 40 which will become very real for them. If their marriages do not last, then they will have to learn to cope with the reality of older male/female dynamics and the judgment from younger women like that they subject us to now. It will be rude awakening, especially if they don't snap out of their male-oriented thinking.

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross. You have an opinion and so do I. I will be older one day... that's how life works. You can convince yourself of whatever you need to in order to justify yourself here. I am still laughing about just WHO are the ones being so defensive about their age difference.

Ok so if they do actually select a younger woman than to me that means they actually are looking for love since they are being selective.

One could also say/believe that any muslim man that marries outside of his faith (muslim/christian/jew) is not really looking for love or being selective either... is he just settling for whatever will get him a ticket to the land of gold?

Hahahaha I always love to see come back to the one argument you think you have against me. Good try I've already seen it from you. I don't respect your opinion nor do I take it to mean anything. I believe you have been brainwashed. Good luck with that!

[Sofiyya 1,687]

What is so unfortunate is that young women with age prejudices don't seem to realize is that one day, if they don't die soon, they will be us. They also don't realize that it doesn't take long to age over 40, or that there is a negative perception in society of women over 40 which will become very real for them. If their marriages do not last, then they will have to learn to cope with the reality of older male/female dynamics and the judgment from younger women like that they subject us to now. It will be rude awakening, especially if they don't snap out of their male-oriented thinking.

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross. You have an opinion and so do I. I will be older one day... that's how life works. You can convince yourself of whatever you need to in order to justify yourself here. I am still laughing about just WHO are the ones being so defensive about their age difference.

I'm laughing at how easily you see yourself as someone I could be referring to. I'm not concerned. Your wakeup call will come, child, and sooner than you think.

[sarah and hicham 3]

What is so unfortunate is that young women with age prejudices don't seem to realize is that one day, if they don't die soon, they will be us. They also don't realize that it doesn't take long to age over 40, or that there is a negative perception in society of women over 40 which will become very real for them. If their marriages do not last, then they will have to learn to cope with the reality of older male/female dynamics and the judgment from younger women like that they subject us to now. It will be rude awakening, especially if they don't snap out of their male-oriented thinking.

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross. You have an opinion and so do I. I will be older one day... that's how life works. You can convince yourself of whatever you need to in order to justify yourself here. I am still laughing about just WHO are the ones being so defensive about their age difference.

I'm laughing at how easily you see yourself as someone I could be referring to. I'm not concerned. Your wakeup call will come, child, and sooner than you think.

wake up call to what?

[Sofiyya 1,687]

wake up call to what?

You'll see. Time will tell.

Edited October 30, 2006 by szsz

[Ban Hammer 13,346]

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross.

sarah, one sentence contradicts the other

[limah 1]

I knew from pretty much the beginning of our relationship that Mohamed wanted children. He loves kids. I couldn't go further into the relationship if I didn't want more. That would've been unfair to him. I'm not sure how many more children I could handle but at least one would be great. I have two boys so I'd really like to have a girl and Mohamed really wants a girl. He wants for us to start as soon as he gets here but I would really like to wait at least 6 mos. to start. First, I would like a little "us" time. Another reason would be to test the waters of us actually living as a married couple. I wouldn't want to bring a child into a relationship that's not healthy. Me spending 7 weeks total with him isn't a good judge of whether our marriage would work. I guess 6 mos. isn't a long time either but it's better than nothing and I don't think I can hold out on the old boy longer than that. I really don't want to be having babies into my 40s. My original cut off was 35.

Hey, you "had" a cut off time too. Well, I had my daughter really young. The doctor suggested that I wait about 10 years (I think) to have more, because my daughter was breech. (thank god for the bikini incisions!) I guess that was supposed to give me time to heal completely. She is 13, never had any more , didnt want any more. Now I do. My husband doesnt have any, & he will be a great father. We agreed that we will wait 1 year b4 we have kids. Of course, we want to do the "us" thing first, yes I have a daughter but b4 we have kidzz 2gthr, and of course he needs the time to get settled into a job that he finds comfortable, physically and financially. I am dying to have my life complete with my husband here, and my daughter really wants us to have a baby right away, but you have to do it how it makes sense for you, u know. I might have 2 or 3. It depends on how fat i get after #1, and after so long... 13 years, Good Lord.........

I am excited about it tho, I must admit!

Edited October 30, 2006 by limah

[peezey 0]

What is so unfortunate is that young women with age prejudices don't seem to realize is that one day, if they don't die soon, they will be us. They also don't realize that it doesn't take long to age over 40, or that there is a negative perception in society of women over 40 which will become very real for them. If their marriages do not last, then they will have to learn to cope with the reality of older male/female dynamics and the judgment from younger women like that they subject us to now. It will be rude awakening, especially if they don't snap out of their male-oriented thinking.

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross. You have an opinion and so do I. I will be older one day... that's how life works. You can convince yourself of whatever you need to in order to justify yourself here. I am still laughing about just WHO are the ones being so defensive about their age difference.

I'm laughing at how easily you see yourself as someone I could be referring to. I'm not concerned. Your wakeup call will come, child, and sooner than you think.

With your condescending use of the word "child" I assume you are saying because Sarah is a younger (and female), her opinion isn't worth as much as the young men who seem to be worth the world here in this discussion?

You continually lecture about your belief that women do not value themselves appropriately, thereby creating huge problems in societal matters....pre-marital sex, divorce, lack of religion in families, all of which I completely agree with you about. Women do not value themselves properly. But is it not the responsibility of those of us who are older, have lived through more, and do know there are rocky roads to come to uplift young women rather than make snide comments and dismiss their opinions as worthless?

[Sofiyya 1,687]

What is so unfortunate is that young women with age prejudices don't seem to realize is that one day, if they don't die soon, they will be us. They also don't realize that it doesn't take long to age over 40, or that there is a negative perception in society of women over 40 which will become very real for them. If their marriages do not last, then they will have to learn to cope with the reality of older male/female dynamics and the judgment from younger women like that they subject us to now. It will be rude awakening, especially if they don't snap out of their male-oriented thinking.

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross. You have an opinion and so do I. I will be older one day... that's how life works. You can convince yourself of whatever you need to in order to justify yourself here. I am still laughing about just WHO are the ones being so defensive about their age difference.

I'm laughing at how easily you see yourself as someone I could be referring to. I'm not concerned. Your wakeup call will come, child, and sooner than you think.

With your condescending use of the word "child" I assume you are saying because Sarah is a younger (and female), her opinion isn't worth as much as the young men who seem to be worth the world here in this discussion?

You continually lecture about your belief that women do not value themselves appropriately, thereby creating huge problems in societal matters....pre-marital sex, divorce, lack of religion in families, all of which I completely agree with you about. Women do not value themselves properly. But is it not the responsibility of those of us who are older, have lived through more, and do know there are rocky roads to come to uplift young women rather than make snide comments and dismiss their opinions as worthless?

Good! I'm glad you feel that way, peezy, because I have my hands full, so I'll be happy to let you take care of that part. Take over and have fun!

Edited October 30, 2006 by szsz

[peezey 0]

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross.

sarah, one sentence contradicts the other

Explaing how this is a contradiction? Prejudice implies a systematic dislike for something. Sarah is only saying that she thinks it's gross thinking of people her parents' age marrying someone her own age. She hasn't mentioned any other part of age-related issues that she finds problems with.

[ya falaha! 0]

I hope the next time around is better for you.

My sons are 10 and nearly 9 (he'll be 9 in December). My youngest son was telling me how he hopes his new step mom gets pregnant so he can have a brother or sister. I told him..you know I could give you a brother or sister too. He gave me this look and said...you have old kids, mom, it's too late for you! LOL!

I knew from pretty much the beginning of our relationship that Mohamed wanted children. He loves kids. I couldn't go further into the relationship if I didn't want more. That would've been unfair to him. I'm not sure how many more children I could handle but at least one would be great. I have two boys so I'd really like to have a girl and Mohamed really wants a girl. He wants for us to start as soon as he gets here but I would really like to wait at least 6 mos. to start. First, I would like a little "us" time. Another reason would be to test the waters of us actually living as a married couple. I wouldn't want to bring a child into a relationship that's not healthy. Me spending 7 weeks total with him isn't a good judge of whether our marriage would work. I guess 6 mos. isn't a long time either but it's better than nothing and I don't think I can hold out on the old boy longer than that. I really don't want to be having babies into my 40s. My original cut off was 35.

Hey, you "had" a cut off time too. Well, I had my daughter really young. The doctor suggested that I wait about 10 years (I think) to have more, because my daughter was breech. (thank god for the bikini incisions!) I guess that was supposed to give me time to heal completely. She is 13, never had any more , didnt want any more. Now I do. My husband doesnt have any, & he will be a great father. We agreed that we will wait 1 year b4 we have kids. Of course, we want to do the "us" thing first, yes I have a daughter but b4 we have kidzz 2gthr, and of course he needs the time to get settled into a job that he finds comfortable, physically and financially. I am dying to have my life complete with my husband here, and my daughter really wants us to have a baby right away, but you have to do it how it makes sense for you, u know. I might have 2 or 3. It depends on how fat i get after #1, and after so long... 13 years, Good Lord.........

I am excited about it tho, I must admit!

[Sofiyya 1,687]

I do not have age prejudices, thank you. You think it's ok, I think it's gross.

sarah, one sentence contradicts the other

Explaing how this is a contradiction? Prejudice implies a systematic dislike for something. Sarah is only saying that she thinks it's gross thinking of people her parents' age marrying someone her own age. She hasn't mentioned any other part of age-related issues that she finds problems with.

It's clear that you are missing alot of what has gone on before. BTW, prejudice is a dislike for something you know nothing about - pre-judging - before you have the facts.

[mybackpages 0]

one more thing... I want nothing to do with a man 20 years older than myself. Gross!

awww

don't worry Charles, I'm sure Sarah would make an exception for you if she was not happily married and you didn't have Nessa

[dawnnhatem 0]

I just got the funniest flashback(hehe, to me):

1985. I was 16 years old in beautyschool gossiping with some other teenaged classmates about one that was dating some 30+ yr old guy. I remember saying that that was so gross. "Ewwwww like his skin is different or something. How can she touch that?" It seems like yesterday!

I actually quit beautyschool and went back to high school because I hated touching old people! I guess I am now the old person that grossed me out a just few (what seems like)moments ago!

Anyway, Sarah, you will see that soon, 30 and 40 won't seem so old, and thats not to be condescending, just a friendly fact that sometimes you just cant know til you are old too .

[mybackpages 0]

But is it not the responsibility of those of us who are older, have lived through more, and do know there are rocky roads to come to uplift young women rather than make snide comments and dismiss their opinions as worthless?

We are not doing anyone favors when we allow our own experiences to cloud how we view others

one more thing... I want nothing to do with a man 20 years older than myself. Gross!

It's the saggy butt thing isn't it Sarah. And I don't blame you. I chose younger remember?

Edited October 30, 2006 by mybackpages