Boy Scouts' homosexual ban conflicts Bay Area California parents

[decocker 7,198]

There is a darn good reason you don't send men off to camp with troop of girl scouts.

But parents will undoubtedly send their male youth group leader or family deacon with a group of girls. a group of boys. a group of both.

All I'm saying is stereotypes of child molesters, are just that - stereotypes. it's ineffective for me to view a person's sexual preference or religious/marital status to prejudge a possible mentor(be it scouts or teen group or family friend) for my son because in my experience all of the stereotypical safety nets pointed to the abuser being a stand up fellow. this meant no victim spoke up about it for many years and the ones who did were not believed by their parents. it wasn't until a family member of his stepped forward that the congregation did a collective, oops.

i'd rather focus on communicating with my son about the proper boundaries of relationships and in doing that, also reinforce he can always tell me anything another person does to make him feel uncomfortable and i will have his back 100%.

reinforcing stereotypes as a means of defense only means you're letting a large source of the problem go unchecked.

[The Nature Boy 4,224]

But parents will undoubtedly send their male youth group leader or family deacon with a group of girls. a group of boys. a group of both.

All I'm saying is stereotypes of child molesters, are just that - stereotypes. it's ineffective for me to view a person's sexual preference or religious/marital status to prejudge a possible mentor(be it scouts or teen group or family friend) for my son because in my experience all of the stereotypical safety nets pointed to the abuser being a stand up fellow. this meant no victim spoke up about it for many years and the ones who did were not believed by their parents. it wasn't until a family member of his stepped forward that the congregation did a collective, oops.

i'd rather focus on communicating with my son about the proper boundaries of relationships and in doing that, also reinforce he can always tell me anything another person does to make him feel uncomfortable and i will have his back 100%.

reinforcing stereotypes as a means of defense only means you're letting a large source of the problem go unchecked.

I use to run an adult singles group that met for supper, bowling etc. I encountered two registered sex offenders thru the years both were Heterosexual bible thumpers

[Danno 1,228]

But parents will undoubtedly send their male youth group leader or family deacon with a group of girls. a group of boys. a group of both.

All I'm saying is stereotypes of child molesters, are just that - stereotypes. it's ineffective for me to view a person's sexual preference or religious/marital status to prejudge a possible mentor(be it scouts or teen group or family friend) for my son because in my experience all of the stereotypical safety nets pointed to the abuser being a stand up fellow. this meant no victim spoke up about it for many years and the ones who did were not believed by their parents. it wasn't until a family member of his stepped forward that the congregation did a collective, oops.

i'd rather focus on communicating with my son about the proper boundaries of relationships and in doing that, also reinforce he can always tell me anything another person does to make him feel uncomfortable and i will have his back 100%.

reinforcing stereotypes as a means of defense only means you're letting a large source of the problem go unchecked.

I hear what you are saying but your assumption that stereotypes are always without merit is just wrong.

At the same time we have also seen how all the "talks" parents have with their kids are no real defense against these clever manipulative people and when you have the responsibility of safeguarding other peoples kids you must use the most generalizations and logic.

It is now estimated that 40% of the victims child and teen sex abuse cases are boys.

Gay men are like 3% of the population.

You do the math.

[Usui Takumi 1,562]

I hear what you are saying but your assumption that stereotypes are always without merit is just wrong.

At the same time we have also seen how all the "talks" parents have with their kids are no real defense against these clever manipulative people and when you have the responsibility of safeguarding other peoples kids you must use the most generalizations and logic.

It is now estimated that 40% of the victims child and teen sex abuse cases are boys.

Gay men are like 3% of the population.

You do the math.

Is that 40% related to male offenders only?

[Danno 1,228]

Is that 40% related to male offenders only?

40% of molestations cases consist of male victims.

Certainly the news is no scientific research but if one just notices how many of these cases in the news involve boys and young men.

I suspect these high rates are not so much because gay men are stalking 13 year olds but because men have much greater access to young boys than men do to say 13 year old girls.

I could much easier invite a 13 year old boy I hardly know from my neighborhood

to go fishing with me than I could his twin sister.

And why is that?

Because the expectation might be interested in baiting more than her hook.

If I were gay, why not take the same precaution with the son?

[MyLittlePony 340]

Very sad to see the gayness spread to the scouts like a disease.

[Danno 1,228]

I use to run an adult singles group that met for supper, bowling etc. I encountered two registered sex offenders thru the years both were Heterosexual bible thumpers

That must be because people who believe the bible are into that kind of stuff no?

[Danno 1,228]

Very sad to see the gayness spread to the scouts like a disease.

I can tell you this, they had better up the limits of their insurance policy because these groups are huge targets.

Consider this case alone.

It seems no own was held accountable, not the police, not the court system not the parents,,,,, just the Boy scouts.

Boy Scouts of America Must Pay Man $18.5M

http://abcnews.go.com/WN/boy-scouts-pay-man-185m-punitive-damages/story?id=10463429#.UHN71I40vrF

[The Nature Boy 4,224]

That must be because people who believe the bible are into that kind of stuff no?

Not sure from a purely academic view point but it did seem that the most vocal of the Christians also were the ones they had the most personal problems. I.E- Could not keep a job, thrown away children that stayed in trouble, could not function without taking advantage of others, had very promiscuous sex lives etc etc. Not sure why that was but it was a very notcable trend.

The men even joked often about,-- If you want to get lucky pick up a girl a church that has her hands in the air and runs down to the alter. She will be all over you before you leave the parking lot. We found it to be somewhat true.

[decocker 7,198]

I hear what you are saying but your assumption that stereotypes are always without merit is just wrong.

At the same time we have also seen how all the "talks" parents have with their kids are no real defense against these clever manipulative people and when you have the responsibility of safeguarding other peoples kids you must use the most generalizations and logic.

It is now estimated that 40% of the victims child and teen sex abuse cases are boys.

Gay men are like 3% of the population.

You do the math.

you don't hear what i was saying, i didn't say stereotypes are without merit - you're just picking the wrong stereotype. the correct, and only correct, stereotype to apply when concerning child molesters is - they are all ADULTS.

period. doesn't matter if they are gay or straight.

your argument has some gaping holes. 40 percent of the victims of sexual abuse are male? or is it that male victims are more inclined to speak up? gay men are 3% of the population - but how many of them are sex offenders? i dunno about you or where you live - but you look up the registered sex offenders in my community - here in good ol virginia - they are pretty much all white rednecks. to judge a mugshot.

your problem is that you've been taught to fear homosexuals as deviants and you're trying to justify that fear in your mind by deciding that homosexual men can't control themselves. i see you also do this in your mind with heterosexual men, when you say that 'you don't send a man with a group of girl scouts' or whatever. but in my opinion, men CAN control themselves around boys and girls. fact of the matter - most, the majority, of men don't even have to try. caring for children without molesting them is completely natural and to be expected of men regardless of sexual orientation.

of course, you can choose to place prejudgement of homosexuals (if you know their sexual preference) and feel relatively safe in your assumptions. i don't know if you have kids, but to me, like i said in my first post, you're letting a huge part of the problem go unchecked.

Edited October 9, 2012 by val erie

[Danno 1,228]

you don't hear what i was saying, i didn't say stereotypes are without merit - you're just picking the wrong stereotype. the correct, and only correct, stereotype to apply when concerning child molesters is - they are all ADULTS.

period. doesn't matter if they are gay or straight.

your argument has some gaping holes. 40 percent of the victims of sexual abuse are male? or is it that male victims are more inclined to speak up? gay men are 3% of the population - but how many of them are sex offenders? i dunno about you or where you live - but you look up the registered sex offenders in my community - here in good ol virginia - they are pretty much all white rednecks. to judge a mugshot.

your problem is that you've been taught to fear homosexuals as deviants and you're trying to justify that fear in your mind by deciding that homosexual men can't control themselves. i see you also do this in your mind with heterosexual men, when you say that 'you don't send a man with a group of girl scouts' or whatever. but in my opinion, men CAN control themselves around boys and girls. fact of the matter - most, the majority, of men don't even have to try. caring for children without molesting them is completely natural and to be expected of men regardless of sexual orientation.

of course, you can choose to place prejudgement of homosexuals (if you know their sexual preference) and feel relatively safe in your assumptions. i don't know if you have kids, but to me, like i said in my first post, you're letting a huge part of the problem go unchecked.

Well you posted your opinion but little else so there is not much to work with.

I guess in your mind "all" adults have the possibility of abusing kids so we should put the same association parameters around them and children equally. (Are you with the TSA).

What gave you the impression I "fear" homosexuals" I simply laid out two cases one based on math.

-3% of the population are Gay men (aprox)

-40% of molestation cases are on males.

Some of these molestation cases,( with the youngest victims), are sometimes committed by heterosexual men.

I also speculated that if more heterosexual men were in trusted positions with young girls, along with the opportunity for misconduct...we would see more cases. I base that on the belief that most people are neither a Devil or an angel, but at different places in between which is why good common sense precautions, those we used to take for granted are helpful in limiting incidents, we have gotten away from that.

This is one reason I think most of these cases involve family members.....family members and friends have unique opportunity.

Maybe you are missing my latter point and that is.... I don't believe Gays are wildly attracted to children, but they often find themselves in opportune positions with boys. If hetro men were exposed at the same level with young girls we would see more incidents.

very few of the perpetrators get in a van and kidnap kids..... they come across them in their daily life. Sure the hard core cases gravitate to kids camps, day cares and Boy scouts.... but I would suspect those are the minority of cases.

I respect that you have had personal experience with this issue, so I value your thoughts on it although some time direct experience can enlighten and sometime it can skew the reality, still I value your willingness to give input.

[Usui Takumi 1,562]

40% of molestations cases consist of male victims.

Certainly the news is no scientific research but if one just notices how many of these cases in the news involve boys and young men.

I suspect these high rates are not so much because gay men are stalking 13 year olds but because men have much greater access to young boys than men do to say 13 year old girls.

I could much easier invite a 13 year old boy I hardly know from my neighborhood

to go fishing with me than I could his twin sister.

And why is that?

Because the expectation might be interested in baiting more than her hook.

If I were gay, why not take the same precaution with the son?

I mean is the sample group male offenders only or is it a mix of male/female?

[Danno 1,228]

I mean is the sample group male offenders only or is it a mix of male/female?

I suppose it would involve victims of these -all too common cases.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/08/sarah-jones-ex-cincinnati_n_1949106.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular

Sarah Jones, Ex-Cincinnati Bengals Cheerleader, Pleads Guilty To Sex With Minor

[Usui Takumi 1,562]

I suppose it would involve victims of these -all too common cases.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/10/08/sarah-jones-ex-cincinnati_n_1949106.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular

Sarah Jones, Ex-Cincinnati Bengals Cheerleader, Pleads Guilty To Sex With Minor

Well I thought perhaps the balance of victims were directly related to the sex of the offender...ie 40% of offenders are females. But I notice that woman only make up about 3-4% of offenders, so what we have is a primarily male problem.

[Penny Lane 8,159]

Very sad to see the gayness spread to the scouts like a disease.