Is this a good idea?

[sophielas 2]

Hello all,

This is my first post here, after spending many hours reviewing all the information I can find online (and especially on this forum). It is wonderful to find so many people thinking about all the same things that we are! It does all feel a little bit overwhelming. I am hoping to get some feedback from experienced people about how we might approach our Visa journey, given our particular situation.

I am a New Zealander, my fiance is the US citizen. We are currently residing together in New Zealand, he is here on a 9 month tourist visa, working remotely for US clients. It is possible he will transfer onto a NZ work visa within the next month or so (I don't know if that will change anything? or have implications?). We have looked into applying for the K1 fiance visa, or the CR1 spousal visa and have come to the conclusion that the spousal visa is probably a better idea for us. This is because it appears to be cheaper, less restrictions/further paperwork upon entering US, and a potential chance of even being faster (given this mysterious trend of sometimes expediting applications made from overseas). Also it seems the fiance visa generally is geared towards US citizens living in the US petitioning for their overseas based fiance to enter... and this does not really seem to apply to our current living situation. But I am open to any thoughts on this.

In terms of our plans, that would mean a simple informal legal wedding in NZ, with just us at the registry office, and then perhaps in a year's time having a formal family and friends wedding ceremony (minus the legal bits) in the US, which would allow us to plan properly to bring together our respective spread-out families without additional visa pressures to worry about. My only fear about this approach is, however, will this appear bona fide enough? We probably would not be telling people we were privately legally married ahead of our public celebration. Will it be suspicious if we have such a small wedding in NZ, and then talk about having another larger wedding ceremony at a later date in the US? I do not want to appear to be doing anything sneaky, and I want it to be all legal and above board.

I would also like to change my name to my new married name, and have a question about passports and the I-130 form. Would it be acceptable to submit our application immediately following our wedding, filing the petition for me with my new name, but submitting a copy of my passport which would obviously still be in my maiden name? The alternative to that would be to apply and get a new passport in my new name, then submit the application with copies of the pages of my brand new passport. But is that absolutely necessary? Would it be acceptable to just apply for the new passport in the new name at some point between NOA1 and NOA2 instead? (thinking about time saving here)

My head is spinning! I hope someone out there can provide some insight into any of this...! Many, many thanks in advance.

Sophie

[Nick1980 11]

Hello all,

This is my first post here, after spending many hours reviewing all the information I can find online (and especially on this forum). It is wonderful to find so many people thinking about all the same things that we are! It does all feel a little bit overwhelming. I am hoping to get some feedback from experienced people about how we might approach our Visa journey, given our particular situation.

I am a New Zealander, my fiance is the US citizen. We are currently residing together in New Zealand, he is here on a 9 month tourist visa, working remotely for US clients. It is possible he will transfer onto a NZ work visa within the next month or so (I don't know if that will change anything? or have implications?). We have looked into applying for the K1 fiance visa, or the CR1 spousal visa and have come to the conclusion that the spousal visa is probably a better idea for us. This is because it appears to be cheaper, less restrictions/further paperwork upon entering US, and a potential chance of even being faster (given this mysterious trend of sometimes expediting applications made from overseas). Also it seems the fiance visa generally is geared towards US citizens living in the US petitioning for their overseas based fiance to enter... and this does not really seem to apply to our current living situation. But I am open to any thoughts on this.

In terms of our plans, that would mean a simple informal legal wedding in NZ, with just us at the registry office, and then perhaps in a year's time having a formal family and friends wedding ceremony (minus the legal bits) in the US, which would allow us to plan properly to bring together our respective spread-out families without additional visa pressures to worry about. My only fear about this approach is, however, will this appear bona fide enough? We probably would not be telling people we were privately legally married ahead of our public celebration. Will it be suspicious if we have such a small wedding in NZ, and then talk about having another larger wedding ceremony at a later date in the US? I do not want to appear to be doing anything sneaky, and I want it to be all legal and above board.

I would also like to change my name to my new married name, and have a question about passports and the I-130 form. Would it be acceptable to submit our application immediately following our wedding, filing the petition for me with my new name, but submitting a copy of my passport which would obviously still be in my maiden name? The alternative to that would be to apply and get a new passport in my new name, then submit the application with copies of the pages of my brand new passport. But is that absolutely necessary? Would it be acceptable to just apply for the new passport in the new name at some point between NOA1 and NOA2 instead? (thinking about time saving here)

My head is spinning! I hope someone out there can provide some insight into any of this...! Many, many thanks in advance.

Sophie

Hey Sophie,

Your 1st question is about which visa is best for you. There are more benefits of the CR-1/IR-1 visa as you mentioned, less restrictions upon entering the USA, cheaper (not a whole bunch), the processing times are maybe a little faster. You just have to get married

It is not illegal to not tell your families about your marriage, however it could appear "sneaky". I know you probably would like it to be a surprise, but I would tell them. My wife and I also had a civil ceremony with a few friends present. We waited 3 months after marrying to apply, not for legal reasons, for $$$ reasons As long as you can prove that your marriage is bonafide, there is no time restriction on when you can apply after marrying.

About your documents, correct me if I am wrong, once you marry wouldn't all your documents with your maiden name be invalid? You could take your marriage certificate and apply for new documents. It would be faster to maybe get a new Birth certificate than a passport and you could submit your Birth cert. It doesn't seem sensible to submit an I-130 with a name different than the name on the Passport you'd be submitting.

good luck

Nick

[Ryan H 3,812]

About your documents, correct me if I am wrong, once you marry wouldn't all your documents with your maiden name be invalid?

Incorrect, getting married does not invalidate documentation containing one's maiden name. Changing one's name is to match that of their spouse is one's choice.

OP, since you are the beneficiary, your passport is not needed for submission of the I-130 petition. If you wish to change your name, you can obtain a new passport after you get married and you should have the new passport when the time comes to submit forms and documentation to the NVC (FYI, the NVC will only require a copy of the biographic page of your passport).

[Anh map 2,098]

The passport and the visa will have to be in the same name. Make your choice and then obtain any needed documents / changes.

From what you're saying the spouse visa path is the one that I would choose for all the reasons that you listed.

Best of luck.

[Nick1980 11]

Incorrect, getting married does not invalidate documentation containing one's maiden name. Changing one's name is to match that of their spouse is one's choice.

OP, since you are the beneficiary, your passport is not needed for submission of the I-130 petition. If you wish to change your name, you can obtain a new passport after you get married and you should have the new passport when the time comes to submit forms and documentation to the NVC (FYI, the NVC will only require a copy of the biographic page of your passport).

Changing one's name is their choice, however if they choose to take their spouse's name, then legally that is their new name as stated on the Marriage Certificate no? Isn't one obligated by law to change all documents within a certain period of time from said marriage? That would be like having 2 names if you are able to keep the old documents with Maiden name on them.

[velrich 50]

Changing one's name is their choice, however if they choose to take their spouse's name, then legally that is their new name as stated on the Marriage Certificate no? Isn't one obligated by law to change all documents within a certain period of time from said marriage? That would be like having 2 names if you are able to keep the old documents with Maiden name on them.

No one is obligated to change their name or documents after they get married.

They are only required to use one or the other and be consistent especially on legal documents.

[The Mean Lady 604]

No one is obligated to change their name or documents after they get married.

They are only required to use one or the other and be consistent especially on legal documents.

Not in the US, at least not as my mother and I experience it.

My mother has been married for 11 years and has her name changed on everything except her SSN.

She files her taxes in her maiden name but everything else she does is in her married name.

I've been married for 2 years, but only changed my name about a year ago.

My SSN is also not changed and neither is it changed with my employer on many documents such as my insurance and 401k.

As long as you can prove your name with your marriage license (which I always keep in the car) you're fine.

Edited October 2, 2012 by KDubovik

[NikLR 13,227]

In Canada and probably other common-wealth countries like NZ and Aus, and in the USA, woman changing her name to a married name does not mean she gives up her maiden name. Only changing your birth certificate does that. After a divorce a woman can go back to her maiden name if she chooses, without penalty except for the costs of her docume nts. A woman also doesn't HAVE to change her name.

Just an fyi, if you chose to do the name change, you'll initially be waiting on a marriage certificate. You can double check but most places mail it to you after the marriage is registered. Mine took 4 weeks. I have a friend who was married in a different province and has to order one, she doesn't get a free one like I did. 8 weeks later she figured it out (well I did for her) and she has to wait for it to show up now... So add that to the time it takes before you can begin filing, but also add up to 6 weeks (or however long it is for NZ) to get a passport back too. However you don't need your passport until later in the process, when it's at the NVC stage, but if you can do direct consular filing, the process could go a lot faster than the 5 months it takes for us without DCF.

I don't know if NZ does DCF?

If so, I would make a choice to use one name or the other sooner vs later.

Also let important people (like your parents) attend or know about the first wedding. It makes it seem like less of a big deal. You're then saving more people, including yourselves, money vs being sneaky about a wedding.

Edited October 2, 2012 by NikiR

[Nick1980 11]

Not in the US, at least not as my mother and I experience it.

My mother has been married for 11 years and has her name changed on everything except her SSN.

She files her taxes in her maiden name but everything else she does is in her married name.

I've been married for 2 years, but only changed my name about a year ago.

My SSN is also not changed and neither is it changed with my employer on many documents such as my insurance and 401k.

As long as you can prove your name with your marriage license (which I always keep in the car) you're fine.

Ok, I'll take your word for it. It just seemed logical to me that you aren't allowed to use 2 names.

[NikLR 13,227]

In Canada I had to change my SIN (like a US SSN) but not my birth certificate so I always have my maiden name. I personally wouldn't be driving around with my marriage certificate. LOL I don't carry my birth certificate or my SIN either, but then again, you're not supposed to.

[sophielas 2]

Thank you all for your responses, I greatly appreciate it.

Nick1980, I think (as people have mentioned) that the 'legal name' situation does vary depending on laws/customs of various countries. In NZ, it is possible to technically be known by both married/unmarried names at the same time. For example, my sister in law is a nurse, and she kept her unmarried name at work for several years, as that was the name that her registration was under, but for all other purposes her name was changed to the married version. I was just wondering how messy I might make this process if I started changing my name on documents essentially after filing the I-130, but before the NVC stage..

Ryan H, thank you for pointing out that my passport copy (as beneficiary) is not required at I-130 stage. I read the EZ guide somewhere on this site which seemed to imply that it was, but if not, that does make things a little easier, and would speed up the petition without having to delay for a few weeks waiting on my new passport. And if this is the case, I can be consistent in referring to myself in my new name on all forms (despite things like our lease, bills etc that will be showing my unmarried name).

NikiR, thanks for the heads up about the marriage certificate. The wait times I think are pretty good for getting these from our Govt (a few weeks at most) and hopefully getting legally married at the court should also ensure the docs are lodged efficiently! And if I don't need my new passport to initially file (as you mentioned), then that should not hold up the process. No DCF available in NZ, as far as I can deduce.

In terms of our "sneaky wedding", this is a real hard one. Neither of our parents are in this country, and my fiances parents are in the US, and elderly and unable to travel here. This contributes to our desire to have a big wedding celebration, relaxed and with parents, in the US some time towards the end of next year, when we actually live there. I am afraid that if parents know of the legal wedding here, that they cannot attend, they will be sad (hence the desire to just not tell them). However, I am also afraid of a US immigration officer thinking that our parents/family were unaware/absent from our legal wedding is somehow suspicious. I appreciate there is probably no right or wrong solution here!

All your thoughts are gratefully received such an emotional process! I have a lot of empathy for all the people that are patiently trying to work through these immigration processes to simply be with their loved ones.

[jnkmlsux 3]

Hi Sophie!

I'm here in NZ as well, with my husband. Slightly off-topic of the VisaJourney part of your question, but we did something similar (informal wedding in the US with plans to have a "NZ Part 2" later, and we're working on CR1-IR1). The only thing that I've found challenging so far is justifying a "second" "big" wedding when you are already married. Granted, we aren't through NVC yet, but USCIS seemed to have no worries about our "legal" wedding being "bona fide."

Our solution for the "second wedding" is calling it a "celebration" instead of a "wedding." You could hold off switching your name until the "second wedding" which could make it feel more "formal?" Or if you are religious, you could consider them "legal" vs. "religious" weddings? Or you could have it on your 1st Anniversary, and do it as a renewal of your vows? Or get "temporary" rings for the NZ civil ceremony and do a "ring ceremony" for the US 2nd?

Anyway, your wedding is about you two as a couple--the realities of trans-Pacific relationships are part of that wedding--no matter how the actual events take place!

Good luck!

[sophielas 2]

Hi Sophie!

I'm here in NZ as well, with my husband. Slightly off-topic of the VisaJourney part of your question, but we did something similar (informal wedding in the US with plans to have a "NZ Part 2" later, and we're working on CR1-IR1). The only thing that I've found challenging so far is justifying a "second" "big" wedding when you are already married. Granted, we aren't through NVC yet, but USCIS seemed to have no worries about our "legal" wedding being "bona fide."

Our solution for the "second wedding" is calling it a "celebration" instead of a "wedding." You could hold off switching your name until the "second wedding" which could make it feel more "formal?" Or if you are religious, you could consider them "legal" vs. "religious" weddings? Or you could have it on your 1st Anniversary, and do it as a renewal of your vows? Or get "temporary" rings for the NZ civil ceremony and do a "ring ceremony" for the US 2nd?

Anyway, your wedding is about you two as a couple--the realities of trans-Pacific relationships are part of that wedding--no matter how the actual events take place!

Good luck!

Thank you so much for your post much appreciated! And good to know there are other kiwis out there doing this too. Great tips on managing 'multiple weddings'. I was thinking that I would hold off on the name change until wedding 2, plus we won't do rings until then either. I think you are right, these slightly odd things are just the reality of an international relationship. We have decided to differentiate between our 'legal marriage' and our 'wedding', and I suppose the best way to not seem dodgy is to get it all straight in our heads! We know we are legit, hehe... Anyway, please keep me in the loop with your visa journey. We will be filing with USCIS at the end of next month.