"When it comes to adultery, it's 90% the womans fault"

[Karen_L 1]

Going food shopping may lead to sex, so may going to work or riding in an airplane or going to school. That doesn't mean doing any of those activities is "asking for trouble."

Yes I consitently have sex in the freezer section of my local Bi-Lo

Why would you do it in the freezer section? I usually have my supermarket sex in the cereal aisle. It's warmer.

The man you mentioned earlier, the one who never did anything wrong in his marriage until along came some girl, imo it is not the girl's responsibility that he messed up his marriage; it's his. He is the married person, he is responsible for his own principles and actions. Is she wrong for agreeing to sleep with a married man? Sure, but if he cared about his wife and marriage, he wouldn't have messed around. In general, I think it's a bad idea to make women the custodians of male sexuality. Men are responsible for themselves. We hear all the time how rational men are in comparison to women and many religions teach how they are a level above women in some way -- then they should act that way and be responsible for themselves.

In this particular case it wasn't a matter of her "agreeing" to have sex with a married man... it was her specifically seeking out a married man and seducing him until he finally succumbed to her. He was regretful afterwards and completely devestated when she made sure his wife found out about it. They both shared responsibility but the girl in this story was mostly to blame.

That sentence, right there, "...seducing him until he finally succumbed to her." That's where I have the problem. The sex wasn't unavoidable on his part, he could have told her immediately "I'm married and not interested in you." If he told her that firmly once and refused to listen to her further, problem solved. Lots of men (and women) face temptation and not all of them give in to it. Those that do have a weakness in THEIR character, and they are not poor victims of a vicious woman. I might also ask what kind of messages HE was "putting out" that this woman fed upon and reacted to? I'm sure he wasn't all "La dee da how I do love my wife" until the moment she, in all her evil, decided to destroy his perfect world.

No, there's a difference between telling them it's okay to feel attracted to naked women and teaching them, either directly or through implication, that any woman dressed in a sexy way must want sex even if she claims she doesn't and that any feeling of sexual attraction in you must mean the woman also wants sex. THAT is a sexual dysfunction.

No, when women insist on walking the streets nearly nude and then we tell men not to look at us or judge us because of it then what you're teaching men is to not be attracted to girls or you're confusing his body with mixed messages and prepping him for an early life of cialis.

You're also teaching him to repress any natural attractions he might have towards women... it's not then unimaginable that he may develop some kind of complex about this and perhaps take it out on some unsuspecting woman in the future. Not excusing him for it but mental problems start somewhere right?

BTW I have not said anywhere here that it's OK for men to attack women no matter how nude she is.

Well, first of all, honestly how many women do you see on a daily basis who are really walking the streets "nearly nude"? I live in a VERY big city and RARELY RARELY do I see someone whose level of nudity I find to be truly outrageous, and I AM pretty conservative in that regard.

I'm not saying anyone should repress any feelings or urges. I said that there's a difference between encouraging a son to be attracted to girls and telling him, or implying in less direct ways, that all women who aren't dressed very conservatively are 'out for sex' and it's okay to treat them as you want. Muslims revere Jesus as a prophet, so perhaps these words might be of some interest to you: "You have heard that it was said, "you shall not commit adultery". But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Mt.5:27-28). I love how that passage puts the responsibility on the observer, rather than the observed.

I know you haven't said it's OKAY for men to attack women. To my understanding, you have been saying that, if a woman is attacked, if she isn't completely covered up or if she's engaging in a social activity in a group of mixed men and women, she's partly to blame for it. To me, it seems like you're saying that if she was dressed just sexy enough, maybe maybe maybe it wasn't rape, even if she were held down and forced.

[Donna A 4]

woman own the weapon of suduction????

i didnt know i was able to rape another woman. what am i going to stick her with? doesnt rape mean some kind of intrustion of one body part to another? man im confused. who really has the weapon?

[Peikko 1,575]

Let me get this straight. Two adults agree to have consensual sex, at least one of the adults has to be married for this to constitute adultery. Regardless of circumstances, it's predominantly the woman's 'fault' beause women are inherently sexy and men aren't capable of controlling their biological urges? That's supposed to make sense?

[mawilson 2,133]

Two adults agree to have consensual sex, at least one of the adults has to be married for this to constitute adultery.

Prophet Mohammed disagrees.

[Peikko 1,575]

By that you mean?

[Tim and Bethanie 1]

Neuter the cat, and it will not roam!

[mawilson 2,133]

By that you mean?

"Every eye is an adulterer; and every woman perfumeth herself, and goeth

to an assembly where men are, wishing to show herself to them, with a look

of lasciviousness, is an adultress."

[anya-D 8]

by all means if i to wear something nice it doesnt mean i try to get laid... wearing something not baggy doesnt mean women try to create adaultery.. dont know if i make myslef clear.. too sleepy for this rigth now and is going out of town...gl!

[ChristinaM 0]

NO woman deserves to be raped. Period. Whatever she may be wearing, whatever she may be doing, wherever she may be.

Why should a woman not have the right to dress as she pleases? Why should a woman not be able to walk from her car to her home at 3am and feel safe? Why should a woman because she chooses to be at a given place at a given time expect that she will be personally violated? To suggest that a woman should take responsibility for a mans lack of control is simply sick.

Yes, there are things which it is not advisable to do - porecisely because of the danger. But that danger is not created by the woman, she is merely a victim of it. If a man gets mugged in a dark alleyway, do we say he was asking for it by being there alone after dark? No, we do not.

It is sad that a woman must react defensively against an issue which she should never have to address, and sad that lunatics like this can suggest to men that they have any kind of right to commit such heinous acts or that they can in any way shift the blame for their own failings to an innocent person.

[Alex+R 0]

Going food shopping may lead to sex, so may going to work or riding in an airplane or going to school. That doesn't mean doing any of those activities is "asking for trouble."

Yes I consitently have sex in the freezer section of my local Bi-Lo

Why would you do it in the freezer section? I usually have my supermarket sex in the cereal aisle. It's warmer.

The man you mentioned earlier, the one who never did anything wrong in his marriage until along came some girl, imo it is not the girl's responsibility that he messed up his marriage; it's his. He is the married person, he is responsible for his own principles and actions. Is she wrong for agreeing to sleep with a married man? Sure, but if he cared about his wife and marriage, he wouldn't have messed around. In general, I think it's a bad idea to make women the custodians of male sexuality. Men are responsible for themselves. We hear all the time how rational men are in comparison to women and many religions teach how they are a level above women in some way -- then they should act that way and be responsible for themselves.

In this particular case it wasn't a matter of her "agreeing" to have sex with a married man... it was her specifically seeking out a married man and seducing him until he finally succumbed to her. He was regretful afterwards and completely devestated when she made sure his wife found out about it. They both shared responsibility but the girl in this story was mostly to blame.

That sentence, right there, "...seducing him until he finally succumbed to her." That's where I have the problem. The sex wasn't unavoidable on his part, he could have told her immediately "I'm married and not interested in you." If he told her that firmly once and refused to listen to her further, problem solved. Lots of men (and women) face temptation and not all of them give in to it. Those that do have a weakness in THEIR character, and they are not poor victims of a vicious woman. I might also ask what kind of messages HE was "putting out" that this woman fed upon and reacted to? I'm sure he wasn't all "La dee da how I do love my wife" until the moment she, in all her evil, decided to destroy his perfect world.

No, there's a difference between telling them it's okay to feel attracted to naked women and teaching them, either directly or through implication, that any woman dressed in a sexy way must want sex even if she claims she doesn't and that any feeling of sexual attraction in you must mean the woman also wants sex. THAT is a sexual dysfunction.

No, when women insist on walking the streets nearly nude and then we tell men not to look at us or judge us because of it then what you're teaching men is to not be attracted to girls or you're confusing his body with mixed messages and prepping him for an early life of cialis.

You're also teaching him to repress any natural attractions he might have towards women... it's not then unimaginable that he may develop some kind of complex about this and perhaps take it out on some unsuspecting woman in the future. Not excusing him for it but mental problems start somewhere right?

BTW I have not said anywhere here that it's OK for men to attack women no matter how nude she is.

Well, first of all, honestly how many women do you see on a daily basis who are really walking the streets "nearly nude"? I live in a VERY big city and RARELY RARELY do I see someone whose level of nudity I find to be truly outrageous, and I AM pretty conservative in that regard.

I'm not saying anyone should repress any feelings or urges. I said that there's a difference between encouraging a son to be attracted to girls and telling him, or implying in less direct ways, that all women who aren't dressed very conservatively are 'out for sex' and it's okay to treat them as you want. Muslims revere Jesus as a prophet, so perhaps these words might be of some interest to you: "You have heard that it was said, "you shall not commit adultery". But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Mt.5:27-28). I love how that passage puts the responsibility on the observer, rather than the observed.

I know you haven't said it's OKAY for men to attack women. To my understanding, you have been saying that, if a woman is attacked, if she isn't completely covered up or if she's engaging in a social activity in a group of mixed men and women, she's partly to blame for it. To me, it seems like you're saying that if she was dressed just sexy enough, maybe maybe maybe it wasn't rape, even if she were held down and forced.

Anyone else surprised that this topic is actually seven pages worth of controversial?

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

Anyone else surprised that this topic is actually seven pages worth of controversial?

Not really -- there are a few meshugahs around here

[almaty 19]

Anyone else surprised that this topic is actually seven pages worth of controversial?

Not really -- there are a few meshugahs around here

amen to that brother

[Nizzy 1]

I know people who it has been done to and they have said nothing so it makes me wonder how many other women have gone through the same thing. So tell me, how do you know it doesn't go unreported?

If you know women who have been raped and have not reported it then you should be a good friend and make it your personal mission to educate those women on the importance of reporting these crimes so these dogs can be punished for their crimes.

Rapes go unreported in this country too so that makes up for the unreported rapes in other countries statistically speaking.

It's not as cut and dry as you make it seem. If they report it there are numerous consequences that they face and the guy won't be to blame as much as the girl and he won't have anything to lose. I have been a "good friend" but you can preach all you want, it's up to the woman to step up and take control of the situation. And that doesn't happen because they can risk losing their reputation because the blame will fall on them due to people like you who think that women should follow certain rules so as to not tempt men.

[Veiled Princess 1]

I know you haven't said it's OKAY for men to attack women. To my understanding, you have been saying that, if a woman is attacked, if she isn't completely covered up or if she's engaging in a social activity in a group of mixed men and women, she's partly to blame for it. To me, it seems like you're saying that if she was dressed just sexy enough, maybe maybe maybe it wasn't rape, even if she were held down and forced.

I haven't talked about women being attacked at all I have been commenting on women throwing their bodies around and enticing men and then they can't figure out why men see them as sexual objects or why they want sex. I'm not talking about rape at all. The only comment I've made about rape was about that chick Robin who cried rape against Tyson when she was in HIS hotel room in the middle of the night for sex.

[Nizzy 1]

I know you haven't said it's OKAY for men to attack women. To my understanding, you have been saying that, if a woman is attacked, if she isn't completely covered up or if she's engaging in a social activity in a group of mixed men and women, she's partly to blame for it. To me, it seems like you're saying that if she was dressed just sexy enough, maybe maybe maybe it wasn't rape, even if she were held down and forced.

I haven't talked about women being attacked at all I have been commenting on women throwing their bodies around and enticing men and then they can't figure out why men see them as sexual objects or why they want sex. I'm not talking about rape at all. The only comment I've made about rape was about that chick Robin who cried rape against Tyson when she was in HIS hotel room in the middle of the night for sex.

But you fail to see that women will be seen as sexual objects no matter what they wear. I beg and plead with you to go visit Peshawar and see for yourself. Even though I don't cover up here when I was there I did as my cousins did and covered EVERYTHING and only had my eyes showing but I still got comments and touching. So tell me, whose fault is that? I wasn't throwing myself around and I wasn't even making eye contact with anyone. I had my head down and was going on my way.