VictiM of marriage fraud

[Ihavequestions 419]

I'm sorry, but it's hard to buy that someone leaves their third world country to be with the love of their life and when the marriage goes sour (usually at some immigration milestone), they can't leave and go home because they have nothing to go home to, particularly when they leave their spouse to seek refuge with their family member(s) or life-long friend(s) two cities over.

[jasonofape 17]

Gowon, to have a debate you must first say something intelligent that has anything to do with the OP's statement. You just chime in on other people's post and when someone calls you out on it, you claim this is Gowon's world and it still goes round.

You constantly belittle or berate other people's post. Try saying something positive for a change, or just direct your comments to the OP.

OP, you have been giving lots of decent advice. Filter through the nonsense and make a decision based on what you think is best.

So sorry you are having a tough time.

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

..to have a debate you must first say something intelligent ..

I agree, so I'm all ears.

PS: Listen, you don't like me. I get it and it's okay but the sun will still rise tomorrow so get over it and stop following me all over VJ. One of my response is one of only two popular ones on this thread so it's very useful and on point.

Edited September 15, 2012 by Gowon

[ca_babe 129]

Before I got married, my husband and I had decided that we will live in US for the first two years to try it out and if I didn't like it, we would go back to my country and we would live over there instead. If my husband who has lived in US all his life is willing to move to a third world country and leave the opportunities over here, why can't foreign spouses leave US if the marriage did not work especially after just arriving within a few months. How can someone severe their ties with their country after such a short time if the intention to get married wasn't for immigration purposes. How can you lose so much opportunities in a few months!

[Karee 4,190]

Gowon, to have a debate you must first say something intelligent that has anything to do with the OP's statement. You just chime in on other people's post and when someone calls you out on it, you claim this is Gowon's world and it still goes round.

You constantly belittle or berate other people's post. Try saying something positive for a change, or just direct your comments to the OP.

OP, you have been giving lots of decent advice. Filter through the nonsense and make a decision based on what you think is best.

So sorry you are having a tough time.

Don't bother. It's his M.O. I would ignore him, but someone has to correct his mistakes. Trust me they are many. Not just in this thread.

Before I got married, my husband and I had decided that we will live in US for the first two years to try it out and if I didn't like it, we would go back to my country and we would live over there instead. If my husband who has lived in US all his life is willing to move to a third world country and leave the opportunities over here, why can't foreign spouses leave US if the marriage did not work especially after just arriving within a few months. How can someone severe their ties with their country after such a short time if the intention to get married wasn't for immigration purposes. How can you lose so much opportunities in a few months!

It's not easy for an American to get a job in PI or Manilla for that matter.

[rosaline 8]

This isn't about illegal aliens. That is a totally different topic that can be discussed in the political arena.

There are laws protecting against abuse to Non-US spouses. VAWA, however, it gets abused also. You received your green card didn't you?

No, not all US Citizens are the victims just like not all of the Non-US citizens are victims.

And I don't think ALL US citizens claim fraud when it doesn't work out. Maybe just the ones who are wronged actually voice what has transpired with their marriage. The ones who don't feel "wronged" or "scammed" do not feel the need to reach out.

Unfortunately, your logic about marrying another US citizen just doesn't compare. There are no potential long term "rights" related to citizenship at risk.

To the OP... Sorry about your situation, I hope you are able to resolve the issues you have.

Best of luck to you

Yes I did received my GC after he held onto it for months before he contacted me again.He has been abusing me since I came into his country.Isolate me,he told me he wouldnt move to Boston,which is where we were suppose to live because I would want to visit my family often.To him Kansas is the best place where he can keep me under control because I have no one there.

[rosaline 8]

This is the worst part of your whole story. No man is worth giving up your child for. I saw someone the other day who casually mentioned her teenage son wasn't immigrating with her. That's something I can never support or understand.

I did the best thing of not taking my daughter back into a relationship like that.It was better for both her and I.He would stop talking to her whenever he and I had a disagreement and even delete her from FB and then would put his relationship staus as single.

I didnt think it was healthy for my kid,but I thought I owed him that second chance.

[rosaline 8]

because your marriage didnt work that does not make it fraud, and besides we have not heard the other side of the story, sometimes immigrants married US citizens who ends up being crazy and controlling, the immigrant has no choice but to leave the crazy spouse and run for their life after they get greencard

I left before I receive my GC.The second day in the country he threw me out,so I hadnt receive my GC then.I received it 3 months after because he was told that he is witholding something that didnt belong to him and its a crime so thats how we got our GC in hand.After that he felt there was nothing else he could do but ask me to give him a second chance.

[rosaline 8]

OP, he entered after you had been married for 2 years. Nothing much to do about it unless you have proof that he entered the US for the benefits themselves and not for the purpose of being with you(immigration fraud) - in which case, the phone number for ICE is located on the bottom of wach page on Visa JOurney. You personally can't deport him. US citizens have no authority to do so.

---He begged for a second chance and I gave it to him.I lived with him for 1 year in Kansas without seeing my daughter and I chose to attend an important function for her and he neglected me.I was livingin a descent home in my country but he took all of that from me.I'm guessing you know that when people decide to migrate,they get rid of al their assets and so on.To all who says that the foreigner should return home,I think they know that its not that easy after giving up everything.Oh and did I mention that mu US citizen spouse wanted residence in my country which I got for him.And how many of people in abusive relationships leave and go back.

Just last month a US citizen spouse murdered his non US citizen spouse in Long Island because she threaten to leave him.Its us the Non US citizens that speaks ####### about one another that cause the US immigration to reject us whether we have a genuine relationship or not because we bad mouth people like ourself and it ends up falling on us to who might think that our relationship is in good faith.Its the USCIS determines whether our relationship is genuine which makes many of us at an advantage because they cant understand what we go through especially when people like ourself badmouthing us.

Rosaline - while I find it sad that anyone gets stuck in a situation like yours, I have a hard time with all the prescriptions and then being in the military, if I'm reading it correctly? While you're right that the immigrant sometimes get themselves into situations they couldn't have predicted, 2 days worth of being in the country and staying for xx amount of months afterwards.. Personally, I'd advise anyone to save up to go home and start over instead of putting up with that kind of behaviour. You had been with the man for 4 years without knowing that his daughter ran away because of this behaviour? Make a life for your kiddo and yourself in your home country. You keep being the victim because you keep leaning on him("he doesn't answer his phone, I've tried emailing"). Don't crawl back to a person unless you're willing to put up with the behaviour. The behaviour is obviously not changing.

(Off topic I know, I'm sorry)

[Karee 4,190]

Thumbs up to you and yours. I wish all petitioners would do a self immigration intent reality check, I certainly did.

But you can't, The Gowon has proven to be an entity that cannot be ignored.

Laugh. "The Gowon" That pretty much explains it.

[AF-Wife 181]

People are hijacking this threat. It's not about gowon or rosaline or anybody else, it's about the OP. If you wanna talk about your problems and stories, open your own topic!!!

To the OP: how do you know it was fraud and not just a marriage gone wrong at the wrong time?

[DandT14 272]

You are selfish.

A kid has two parents. Perhaps the child is a well centered person who will rather stay in his country with loved ones like the other parent, Grand parents, etc. As opposed to running off with oen parent to that parents flavor of the time.

I don't understand. How does what I said make me selfish? I wasn't suggesting she should drag her kid with her to chase a man. I was suggesting she should have stayed with her child.

It's true that a child has two parents (usually). And usually, they are both important to the child. And if my choice was staying in my country with my kid, or leaving my kid so I could be with a man, I guarantee I would choose to stay with my kid. I don't think that makes me selfish, I think it makes me a woman who loves her children more than anything else in the world. There's not a chance I'd be living in one country while my children were in another. My children can't leave the US. So my Canadian husband had to move here to be with me. Had he refused, I wouldn't have a Canadian husband. Simple as that.

[William33 110]

All,

Some posts removed as TOS violations. Further infractions will result in thread ban and/or suspension of account. Stay on the OP's topic or get out now.

[NiNi123 0]

I know it is fraud because he left right after the10 yrs GC. there is nothing wrong with me. Hr claimed that I can't talk sweet to him. He know me before we even marry. I am not a sweet talker. He accept that. Now his excuse if living me is that. He changed his attitude toward me Right after the GC. I am having a 2 weeks old baby with him. He left me and the baby and go live with relatives. if it really love why he left me and the baby. The baby just 2 weeks old. Hr left wig no sympathy. Is that a fraud or what. Oh my family so nice to him. Help h start his life here. Got a job for him. Give him a car. All the baby stuff my family gave to us yo help is start a l

[NiNi123 0]

Conitnue...

My family help him everything to start His life here without asking for a dime from us. He telling everyone on his family that we treat him do bad and that we font gie him money to go school. What! He is. A lier to make others feel sorry so that they can take him in and help him. Everyone work hard on America there are no such things as free money. Yet my family help him to start life here such as give him transportation and place to live food on the table. What else is not nice to him.