Visa petition sent back for possible revocation.

[pleasure 0]

My Fiancé went for her visa interview scheduled for December 2nd, 2011, at 07:00 a.m. She answered all the questions truthfully and the officer I am sure, was convinced that we indeed have a valid relationship. However, when the officer asked her if I paid a Dowry she told them yes. He then said that he would be returning our visa petition back to the Department of Homeland Security with his recommendation that the petition be reviewed for possible revocation. The reason are as follows: couple is already married because of a payment of a bride price.

My Fiancé was not given the opportunity to explain to the officer that the dowry I paid was simply out of respect for the Nigerian culture. I was told by a Nigerian friend that if you are going to marry a nigerian then it is customary to give the women's parents a Dowry.

We are still waiting for petition to be reviewed by Department of Homeland Security . It has been a long wait. Does anyone know of anyone who has had our experience and what was the final out come?

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

My Fiancé went for her visa interview scheduled for December 2nd, 2011, at 07:00 a.m. She answered all the questions truthfully and the officer I am sure, was convinced that we indeed have a valid relationship. However, when the officer asked her if I paid a Dowry she told them yes. He then said that he would be returning our visa petition back to the Department of Homeland Security with his recommendation that the petition be reviewed for possible revocation. The reason are as follows: couple is already married because of a payment of a bride price.

My Fiancé was not given the opportunity to explain to the officer that the dowry I paid was simply out of respect for the Nigerian culture. I was told by a Nigerian friend that if you are going to marry a nigerian then it is customary to give the women's parents a Dowry.

We are still waiting for petition to be reviewed by Department of Homeland Security . It has been a long wait. Does anyone know of anyone who has had our experience and what was the final out come?

It is not customary to pay a bride price in Nigeria, not in this modern era, but I guess it depends on the financial circumstance of the family and arguably the tribe.

One has to remove any perception of being married when one is doing a K1 visa. I can see going through the bride price deal when one is doing a full on traditional courtship/marriage thing completely inside Nigeria.

This may help others in the future.

[S_R 148]

My Fiancé went for her visa interview scheduled for December 2nd, 2011, at 07:00 a.m. She answered all the questions truthfully and the officer I am sure, was convinced that we indeed have a valid relationship. However, when the officer asked her if I paid a Dowry she told them yes. He then said that he would be returning our visa petition back to the Department of Homeland Security with his recommendation that the petition be reviewed for possible revocation. The reason are as follows: couple is already married because of a payment of a bride price.

My Fiancé was not given the opportunity to explain to the officer that the dowry I paid was simply out of respect for the Nigerian culture. I was told by a Nigerian friend that if you are going to marry a nigerian then it is customary to give the women's parents a Dowry.

We are still waiting for petition to be reviewed by Department of Homeland Security . It has been a long wait. Does anyone know of anyone who has had our experience and what was the final out come?

You should have done your research here before she attended that interview. Lagos flags such words & the outcome has never been pretty. You should go back and get " married" and file for a CR1/IR1 ASAP because your petition will be revoked. Good luck.

[Dana and Divine 61]

I agree. Depending on the amount of time it has been (you did not specify),I believe you should begin getting prepared to go ahead and marry in Nigeria and start the process of IR-1/CR-1 Visa. It may be the only way you can bring her home at this point.

God bless, pray this situation is handled by all involved and you get answers quickly.

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

If you can find written documentation of the marriage traditions of her tribe you could use that to determine at what state you would be considered married. Lagos tends to see bride price as the point of marriage , although in most tribes you would have a ceramony afterwards at which point she would become part of your compound. You are over 6 months, I would put in a service request on the file. The east coast does tend to review the K1's rather than set them to expired. You should be able to argue that bride price like an engagement ring in the US is a ceramony to publiclly declare exclusivity but that the actual marriage and "right" to co habit occurs later. ( not that anyone waits to be married to taste the fruit anymore)

[winnie george 67]

I was in the same situation as you, I was denied based on that same reason...... We had to get married then and start all over again on the CR-1 route and we are almost done with the process

So i will suggest you get married ASAP and start all over again

Good luck to you

[QueenE 174]

Out of respect yes you pay dowry, but paying dowry makes that person your wife that is why you were denied ( Which really it can also be considered engagement cause like other pp said there are more things to do after you do the bride price). We are Igbo and my family is well off so it has nothing to do with modern era, but out of respect for culture and family.

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

It is really a shame that Lagos get away with this. Think of the equilivant in the USA. You give/get an engagement ring-you are not married. You book a honeymoon - you are not married. You buy a dress- you are not married. You hold a rehersal - you are not married. You get the licience -you still are not married. You have a marriage and get the licience signed and filed - then you are married. Until Nigerians fight for what is correct then they will get away with sending K1 petitioners home with a wave of the hand like they love to do.

[winnie george 67]

It is really a shame that Lagos get away with this. Think of the equilivant in the USA. You give/get an engagement ring-you are not married. You book a honeymoon - you are not married. You buy a dress- you are not married. You hold a rehersal - you are not married. You get the licience -you still are not married. You have a marriage and get the licience signed and filed - then you are married. Until Nigerians fight for what is correct then they will get away with sending K1 petitioners home with a wave of the hand like they love to do.

Exactly, you are soo right...... Its really a shame

[Thomas&Cleofe 358]

Wow ....it was like the interviewing officer was setting them up to fail the interview.

[Cathi 5,747]

It is not customary to pay a bride price in Nigeria, not in this modern era, but I guess it depends on the financial circumstance of the family and arguably the tribe.

One has to remove any perception of being married when one is doing a K1 visa. I can see going through the bride price deal when one is doing a full on traditional courtship/marriage thing completely inside Nigeria.

This may help others in the future.

In this day in age it is very common in many cultures for a dowry to be given. Especially in Muslim countries

[dstrausser83 14]

It is really a shame that Lagos get away with this. Think of the equilivant in the USA. You give/get an engagement ring-you are not married. You book a honeymoon - you are not married. You buy a dress- you are not married. You hold a rehersal - you are not married. You get the licience -you still are not married. You have a marriage and get the licience signed and filed - then you are married. Until Nigerians fight for what is correct then they will get away with sending K1 petitioners home with a wave of the hand like they love to do.

Well stated. It is soooo true what you just said. I do not know much about African and Nigerian cultures, but I do know enough that a simple payment can't just finalize a marriage and that could be seen the same as when I gave my fiancee an engagement ring.

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

In this day in age it is very common in many cultures for a dowry to be given. Especially in Muslim countries

Here's what I said:

It is not customary to pay a bride price in Nigeria, not in this modern era, but I guess it depends on the financial circumstance of the family and arguably the tribe.

One has to remove any perception of being married when one is doing a K1 visa. I can see going through the bride price deal when one is doing a full on traditional courtship/marriage thing completely inside Nigeria.

This may help others in the future.

Nigeria is a predominantly Islamic country and I still stand by what I've written.

We've had 5 marriages in my immediate family this year. 3 in this US and 2 in Nigeria with zero dowries. It has been my personal experience, and yours can vary, that educated and professional Nigerians DO NOT pay dowries anymore, mostly. When educated people like Doctors are marrying Doctors, Lawyers marrying Lawyers then not all archaic traditional acts that used to be norms are done. Alternatively, proper vetting is done by family to family, investigative work is done by family to family, gifts may be given from family to family. On the same token, Nigeria is a country where polygamy is legal, lawful and expected. You would be hard pressed to see an educated Nigerian with multiple Wives.

In any case OP has learned the lesson of culture and it's not all lost since he/she can proceed to marriage and file a spousal visa application.

I wish the OP the best of luck on the rest of the journey.

I am Gowon.

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

Wow ....it was like the interviewing officer was setting them up to fail the interview.

Allegedly CO are assured of fraud from Nigerian applicant, it's up to the applicant to answer truthfully based on prior research and to win the CO over. This is why a site like this is valuable. I could care less about someones timeline, but care in great detail about interview experience.

Well stated. It is soooo true what you just said. I do not know much about African and Nigerian cultures, but I do know enough that a simple payment can't just finalize a marriage and that could be seen the same as when I gave my fiancee an engagement ring.

You're right, it doesn't.

When properly done, like in the days of my Mothers and Grandmother, a dowry negotiation can take weeks and is a process. Some dowry payment occurs after the wedding (sometimes the balance). Inter tribal wars have been waged based on dowry payment for Maidens that were not in the condition described

Laws have been established on the books since 1950s on how much dowry and to whom. The Father of the female actor get's the dowry, never the Mother. Even when the Father is deceased, it's the Fathers family that always get's the dowry. I read a post on here where the USC paid the Mother the dowry and without a ceremony.

Anyhoos

[yeppers 3]

Here's what I said:

Nigeria is a predominantly Islamic country and I still stand by what I've written.

We've had 5 marriages in my immediate family this year. 3 in this US and 2 in Nigeria with zero dowries. It has been my personal experience, and yours can vary, that educated and professional Nigerians DO NOT pay dowries anymore, mostly. When educated people like Doctors are marrying Doctors, Lawyers marrying Lawyers then not all archaic traditional acts that used to be norms are done. Alternatively, proper vetting is done by family to family, investigative work is done by family to family, gifts may be given from family to family. On the same token, Nigeria is a country where polygamy is legal, lawful and expected. You would be hard pressed to see an educated Nigerian with multiple Wives.

In any case OP has learned the lesson of culture and it's not all lost since he/she can proceed to marriage and file a spousal visa application.

I wish the OP the best of luck on the rest of the journey.

I am Gowon.

I'm glad you added that it's your personal experience. I've been to at least 10-15 weddings by very affluent Nigerian families (more than half were doctors - PhD and MDs schooled in the US and UK). The families have houses in different cities in Nigeria as well as OWN (not rent) vacation houses in the US and UK. All the husbands paid dowries in shillings (less than $50 USD). It's attached to tribes, cultures, families, etc. It's totally up to the families and we can't categorize all of Nigeria as being a certain way or it just being a "class" thing.

Advice to the OP: I agree with others in that you should go ahead and get married and apply for a CR1. Good luck to the OP.