is my fiance a fraud?

[Karee 4,190]

I digress and concur. But a simple email will not suffice in this case. She will have to follow up with a faxed copy of an actual letter, then she needs to send the letter (signature notarized) via mail/courier whichever she chooses. Here is a thread that discusses this. Milimelo and Pushbrk both commented there.

Agreed. Better to cover all the bases. They probably don't read the emails there anyway.

[Que Saudade 284]

Ok how will i know when the case is closed?

When he gets there and the Embassy worker lets him know. No need for you to add that stress to yourself and your baby.

[TBoneTX 45,663]

I've read this entire thread and the one from 2009, for which QS so helpfully provided the link. (I vaguely remember that thread, from that time.)

OP, from the details in your opening post, his behavior is indeed of concern. However, an even bigger alarm is this: who would apply for so many tourist visas -- and keep applying and applying and applying -- without having very serious immigrant intent? Most people would give up after a couple of denials, three at most -- but he persisted.

I'd bet real money that if he came to the U.S. on the K-1, he'd either bail on you immediately or after he got his green card.

Only you know all the details, but from what you said, there's better than a 50% chance that you're merely his vehicle into the U.S. (in my opinion).

Your intuition caused you to express your concerns here. In addition, your sister is alarmed.

For withdrawal, follow the procedures in the 2009 thread. Keep us apprised, and keep the faith, si man.

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

If you sent your I134 to him with copies of your tax information put a credit alert on your SS number. I can imagine he won't be happy about not getting his visa and the I 134 data is like a do it yourself credit fraud kit. If you have doubts , drop the current petition and concentrate on a healthy baby. If you are wrong and he is the one for you , you can refile later. If not you don't need the stress of a man acting a fool. Never let the regret of mis invested money let you continue to chase a bad investment.

[TBoneTX 45,663]

if all these answer are negative then i say go ahead and cancel the petition.

One of the biggest contributing factors to busted relationships is when one partner ignores even one element of the relationship that causes that person to compromise his principles, character, or integrity. A dozen or more factors can be highly positive... but if just one integral characteristic of the relationship is something that one partner can't compromise on, the relationship isn't right.

If you however can get some positive answer to these i say let him come and you have 90 days to see if he is genuine or not.

Nothing personal, but this advice has been regularly debunked. The K-1 is not a "check the other person out to see if he/she is real or right for me" visa. The petitioner and beneficiary have committed via letters of intent that they WILL marry within 90 days of the beneficiary's entry. The relationship is supposed to be "bona fide" already.

We probably have enough beneficiaries using the K-1 (and the petitioner) as a vehicle to get into the U.S., bail, and disappear.

Edited August 24, 2012 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,663]

A system of questions and answer helps to rationalize things the heart cant see sometimes allowing us to proceed in a more decisive fashion.

You're exactly right: we get more advice on how to buy a car or a washing machine than we do on how to pick a mate. It's a bit more helpful during the screening process than during "damage control," but at least the OP has time to rectify any mistakes before more are made. And your correctness here doesn't change the reality that your earlier statement about the purpose for the K-1 (also said before, by many) has been regularly debunked. The purpose of VJ is to provide accurate information. Consider being happy for the OP that people are trying to quell inaccuracies while advice is being presented.

[Que Saudade 284]

Why do so many people believe they are experts on the visa process and relationships most are giving terrible advise anyways.

Very few claim to be experts. Most advise given on the visa process is from personal experience gained, reading other people's experiences and what they did, and studying the process from start to finish. The OP asked for opinions and advise on 2 basic questions; Her titled post "Is my fiance a fraud?" and " Can I withdraw my petition?" Opinions have been given on the fraud issue. Facts have been given on withdrawing the petition. Advise was not given to compel the OP into action, but rather food for thought.

While it does sound like he has questionable motives these can just be because of the stress of the process.

Did you read the part where he said this??

He even made a few comments about he doesn't need me bugging him anymore and he will soon get his visa so he doesn't have to deal with me bugging him.

That is not stress, that is just plain mean.

What reasons do u think he is just trying to use you ?

Ummmm, 7, count them... 7 attempts at tourist visa all ending in denial.. Nothing more needs to be said.

If you however can get some positive answer to these i say let him come and you have 90 days to see if he is genuine or not.

Now, who is giving bad advise? The K1 is not a test drive from the dealership to check out the interior. Everybody who has ever been in a questionable relationship knows that when "The proverbial defecation comes in contact with a rotory motor" that he will say whatever necessary to overcome the moment. The question remains, "how long will it last"?

The OP has been given some good advise about questions to ask herself. I am sure the OP is not going to fly off the handle and act, but rather reflect on what she needs to do. Whatever the decision she makes, she now has information as to what she can do should she choose to end this, or not. The onus is on her.

Kristina, I do not envy your dilemma. I am empathetic with your situation. Take time for yourself and think this all the way through.

The answer will appear...

Best wishes and good luck with your future...

Edited August 24, 2012 by Que Saudade

[islandgal 74]

Very few claim to be experts. Most advise given on the visa process is from personal experience gained, reading other people's experiences and what they did, and studying the process from start to finish. The OP asked for opinions and advise on 2 basic questions; Her titled post "Is my fiance a fraud?" and " Can I withdraw my petition?" Opinions have been given on the fraud issue. Facts have been given on withdrawing the petition. Advise was not given to compel the OP into action, but rather food for thought.

Did you read the part where he said this??

That is not stress, that is just plain mean.

Ummmm, 7, count them... 7 attempts at tourist visa all ending in denial.. Nothing more needs to be said.

Now, who is giving bad advise? The K1 is not a test drive from the dealership to check out the interior. Everybody who has ever been in a questionable relationship knows that when "The proverbial defecation comes in contact with a rotory motor" that he will say whatever necessary to overcome the moment. The question remains, "how long will it last"?

The OP has been given some good advise about questions to ask herself. I am sure the OP is not going to fly off the handle and act, but rather reflect on what she needs to do. Whatever the decision she makes, she now has information as to what she can do should she choose to end this, or not. The onus is on her.

Kristina, I do not envy your dilemma. I am empathetic with your situation. Take time for yourself and think this all the way through.

The answer will appear...

Best wishes and good luck with your future...

Agreed

[G&M 1]

only you can know how you guys are when you are toghether. If you are having this many second thoughts about it then you really need to search within yourself. How does he treat you when you are visiting him?? has he ever talked about family in the US?

I dont think that he has any legal rights to the child if he stays in Jamaica. To his defense, is he maybe just stressed out about the whole process?? anxious about starting a new life in a few weeks and so on..... these are all things you need to consider. Nobody else can decide that for you.

I wish you good luck

[milimelo 4,514]

Very likely he is a fraud and is only using OP as a way to get into the US and remain. His 7 failed attempts at tourist visa clearly indicate this as well as his current attitude to the OP -- I guess he didn't study the process well enough to realize without marriage and AOS he's not in the clear. At least some benefits of the K-1 visa.

OP - you were given email addresses for IV and ACS - write a letter withdrawing your petition attach it to the email and then also follow up with fax/snail mail to the Embassy in Kingston and USCIS.

You don't necessarily have to tell the beneficiary you are withdrawing the petition, but if you do, do follow what someone else said to put fraud alerts with credit bureaus for your SSN - you never know what he might attempt to use against you.

If you suspect fraud, mention that in the email to the embassy - your choice.

Good luck!

Edited August 24, 2012 by milimelo

[islandgal 74]

If he already said when he gets his visa you won't need to bug him anymore and the repeat applications, chances are your gut instincts are correct. What he probably doesn't realize is that he'll still need you even after he gets the visa (marriage, AOS, etc). I think you're lucky that he's showing his colors sooner than later. Other K1 filers are not so lucky to get obvious and concrete hints as to their fiance's intentions. As with any relationship, other K1 filers just hope and pray that their fiances mean well and they aren't being used.

I'm just curious, how did you find out about the numerous denied applications? Was he the one to tell you? Regarding your baby, you'll definitely have to consider the fact that he may not be around. There will also be some animosity there if you intend on bringing the baby to meet his dad, etc. Although he'll probably find another unsuspecting soul to sponsor him at a later time and make it to the states anyway (if those are truly his intentions). Sigh.

Another idea that someone already suggested is to withdraw the application and if anything re-do it at a later time. The only problem with this is that he'll harbor resentment because of what you did before and for sure he'll skip when he comes later on.

[Julie y Pat 67]

Am I the only one who thinks that seven denied tourist visa applications will raise major red flags with the CO at Kingston if this guy were to have an interview? Baby on the way will not remove doubts the CO will have about this guy's intentions. I find it hard to believe he would be granted the K1 after just one interview.

Edited August 24, 2012 by Julie y Pat

[djricky4 67]

im going to be frank, im a jamaican man and if your really feeling what you said you are, chances are that your right and its best to end the relationship and withdraw the petition. No normal person in jamaica apply for a Visitor Visa 7 times just because he wants to visit. A friend of mine went twice and he got denied and dont wanna go back.....now 7 times seems a bit strange. All you just need to email the consulate @(KingstonIV@state.gov) and make sure you put in the case# in the subject line telling them you want to case close because you suspect you might be a victim of immigration fraud and they will contact you within a day or two. Makes no sense dealing with that stress in the USA, a lot of these guys dont care, they just want the visa which is a gateway to the US, after which they can survive on their own because of the large jamican community there in places. I was surprise to learn of the amount of undocumented jamaicans living there right now. Thank God for VJ it helps a lot of people to see the light

[Xanax 349]

I am an advocate of 'go with your gut'.

You have gotten some good advice here from some experienced members.

I don't have anything extra to add but I wish you the very best of luck for you and your baby.

[ClaireGio 35]

Chances our this page is being monitored by some official from somewhere in USCIS anyway and an e mail has already reached Kingston. Kingston is High fraud anyway, right? He will be walking into that interview up against a brick wall.

If I was your mother Kristina, I would tell you to cut your losses, end this and start afresh with your baby. This man sounds like a fraudster through and through.

Chances are *