dealing with depression

[dwheels76 5,468]

I am so sorry you do have a full plate. But do know you are a military wife and you have strength trust me you didn't even know you had. And yes you will be a busy bee in about 2 months if not sooner with patterns and colors and time will go fast and mum will be back.

Utilize all resources, group meetings you can. One thing with military folk like people here they do understand the stuggle and heartache. Many a babies born and daddy not there. But he will be soon. So don't dwell too much on him not being there but prepare for that little miracle and come back now and than and tell us whats up. We are here with our cyber arms wide open. Big hugs to you.

And thank your husband for the extreme service and sacrifice he gives us each and everyday. This military brat is eternally grateful to you and to him.

[dm559 34]

I'm sorry to hear that you are going through this. It's the sad reality of a military life. Surrounding yourself with other military wives might offer support and comfort. Maybe even get a roommate? My stepson came to the US at the age of 17 and missed the day he was supposed to show for mandatory military service. He now faces execution so he knows he can never return to his native country and will never see his family (Aunts, uncles, grandparents, father, friends)again. So he went through a period of depression so you are not alone.

[Vicomi 31]

Congratulations with your pregnancy!! You have definately made a step in the right direction to reach out for advice and support. Previous posters have made great suggestions, so I do not have much to add. Check online for any pregnancy groups / meet-ups in your local area or uni that will suit your needs. Also consult with your local baby clinic or midwife (or USA equivalent thereof) for information for support for yourself and pregnancy. Good luck and God Bless (F)

Edited August 23, 2012 by Vicomi

[Sandra G. 5,047]

Congrats. There are several groups called "First-time pregnant moms Meetup Groups". Try to find some group in your area.

http://first-time-pregnant-moms.meetup.com/

[beejay 123]

From your post it sounds like you are a strong, smart and resourceful young woman who will be able to ask for and find help when she needs it. I am sorry you have to find yourself in this situation with so much happening all at once but it appears like you are doing everything you can do at this point, now you just have to take it one day at a time.

Sending you a *hug*

Do you have a list of emergency contacts that you could use if you need anything while your husband is gone? Like relatives close by or reliable friends of your husband? Anybody in your classes that you have particularly connected with?

[Dirk 30]

I moved here Feb 2011. Rough start since I was homesick but I ended up adjusting well. Husband was extremely accomodating and I couldnt ask for a better spouse. He is amazing and truly my soulmate. I started grad school and I am excelling in school. Flash forward to the present and I am 15 weeks pregnant. Husband is deploying in about 2 weeks. My mom visited for two weeks which was amazing but too short. Unfortunately she has to work. All of a sudden, I find myself regressing and not being able to sleep, getting so much anxiety over my mom leaving and now my husband. I left my parents to be w my husband and now he has to leave me too for a year I dont feel like I have the strength to endure. We are national guard so we dont live close to any post, I cant go home because of school and insurance is better here, and mom cant come back till Feb (for the birth). Speaking of the birth, my husband cannot make it home this is what i feel to be my biggest trial as of yet, and Im just asking for some support I have friends but they dont really understand how it feels to have everyone you love be so far away

If you need a friend or network, I live in Delaware, My fiance is pregnant in Capiz and due Jan 4th. I understand, her sister also lives in Delaware. I am having similar issues with the fact we are waiting for her visa, and my child will be born away from me at the rate the VSC is going.

[Fight for Love 98]

Yeah Ill have a nanny a month before my due date and my mom is coming two weeks before my due date. Im more worried about Sept-Jan since thats really my alone time. Im hoping Ill be so excited for my baby that Ill be busy thinking about that. My landlord or labor coach has offered to drive me.. *sigh* i need to be strong!!!

yap for the sake of your baby..don't stress yourself...you and the baby will fine...just pray that god will guide you

[lynndy38 64]

Just want to leave a huge hug,and say although you have a challenge ahead of you it will pass and before you know it you will have a beautiful baby to consume your time and mind!!!!

Its normal to have many fears during pregnancy so add your circumstances and you're bound to feel shakey.

The other posters have made some great suggestions,I def think joining pregnancy groups ect would help.Get as much external support around you that you can.Then if you need it,it's there.

Im sure everything will work out,while your husbands away get busy making a baby diary about your thoughts and feelings,cut out pictures of items youd like to buy,strollers,nursery furniture ect......so you can show it to your husband on his return and he can share the ideas youve had and the feelings you've felt.

Lots of luck and keep us posted on your progress!!!!!

[Operator 1,927]

I wear no uniforms, no blues or greens.But, I am in the military, in the ranks rarely seen.I have no rank upon my shoulders. Salutes I do not give.But in the military world is where I live.I am not in the chain of command, orders I do not give or get.But my husband is the one who does, this I can not forget.I am not the one who fires a weapon, Who puts his life on the line.But my job is just as tough, I’m the one who is always left behind.My husband is a patriot, a brave and pride filled man.And the call to serve his country not all can understand.Behind the lines, I see things needed to keep this country free.My husband makes the sacrifice, but so do my kids and me.I love the man I married. The military is his life.So I pledge to support my hero and stand among the silent ranks known as THE MILITARY WIFE.

I spent 10 years in the Marine corps and always thought the wives and kids suffered the most.

We appreciate what your family does for our country and we support you in our thoughts everyday.

Thank you for your service!

[Xanax 349]

I have no advice but I hope everything works out well for you and your family *hug*

[Shiobhan 235]

AUGGG........congrats, next yr this time U'll look back and call it a good experience, not minimizing the situation but I just know U will be OK, join a support group of ppl with buns in the oven, if U R up to it do some walkin at the park with your

birthing coach, get your in-laws or good friend to video tape the birth , try and stay positive, look at the baby things U

have so far & smile, dont go feeling sorry for yourself...............fast forward & think about all the loving,nurturing,

quality time is to come when he returns because an idle mind with pity brewing is depression playground, also pray

[InHisTime 110]

Thank you. The 1st trimester was tough. Im glad I had a hubby for that.

I guess just writing about it helped somewhat. I slept ok last night despite everything. Almost as if Im starting to find peace with the situation

Hi there! Glad that you slept good last night. You are a good and smart woman with a loving husband. I understand how your feel, but everything will pass so no worry too much. Please try to enjoy your pregnancy and if you feel depress, try listening to good music, it is relaxing and good for your baby as well. Time is fast, sure you will be fine and happy especially when you see your little one soon. Congratulations and God bless you and your husband. Take care

[Messybrownhair 251]

I am so sorry you do have a full plate. But do know you are a military wife and you have strength trust me you didn't even know you had. And yes you will be a busy bee in about 2 months if not sooner with patterns and colors and time will go fast and mum will be back.

Utilize all resources, group meetings you can. One thing with military folk like people here they do understand the stuggle and heartache. Many a babies born and daddy not there. But he will be soon. So don't dwell too much on him not being there but prepare for that little miracle and come back now and than and tell us whats up. We are here with our cyber arms wide open. Big hugs to you.

And thank your husband for the extreme service and sacrifice he gives us each and everyday. This military brat is eternally grateful to you and to him.

Thank you. It means a lot just knowing I have so much support from my VJ friends. Even though I may not see you guys, it is a good source of comfort because I know that everyone here is missing their loved ones too.

I'm sorry to hear that you are going through this. It's the sad reality of a military life. Surrounding yourself with other military wives might offer support and comfort. Maybe even get a roommate? My stepson came to the US at the age of 17 and missed the day he was supposed to show for mandatory military service. He now faces execution so he knows he can never return to his native country and will never see his family (Aunts, uncles, grandparents, father, friends)again. So he went through a period of depression so you are not alone.

I'm sorry about your stepson! I do have a roomate who will stay with me until the nanny arrives, which is a huge relief.

Congratulations with your pregnancy!! You have definately made a step in the right direction to reach out for advice and support. Previous posters have made great suggestions, so I do not have much to add. Check online for any pregnancy groups / meet-ups in your local area or uni that will suit your needs. Also consult with your local baby clinic or midwife (or USA equivalent thereof) for information for support for yourself and pregnancy. Good luck and God Bless (F)

Thank you Vicomi! The army has actually provided me with a free labor coach.. I guess as a replacement for my husband lol. I will meet with her for the first time next week. Hopefully she will be nice

Congrats. There are several groups called "First-time pregnant moms Meetup Groups". Try to find some group in your area.

http://first-time-pregnant-moms.meetup.com/

Thanks! I will check it out

From your post it sounds like you are a strong, smart and resourceful young woman who will be able to ask for and find help when she needs it. I am sorry you have to find yourself in this situation with so much happening all at once but it appears like you are doing everything you can do at this point, now you just have to take it one day at a time.

Sending you a *hug*

Do you have a list of emergency contacts that you could use if you need anything while your husband is gone? Like relatives close by or reliable friends of your husband? Anybody in your classes that you have particularly connected with?

My in-laws are about 1 1/2 hour away and they told me to call anytime. My classmates, landlord and some professors all told me that I could call them if I need anything.. Hopefully there will be no emergency though

If you need a friend or network, I live in Delaware, My fiance is pregnant in Capiz and due Jan 4th. I understand, her sister also lives in Delaware. I am having similar issues with the fact we are waiting for her visa, and my child will be born away from me at the rate the VSC is going.

I hope you get to make it to your child's birth!!! Goodluck and God bless to you and your pregnant fiance! If I ever go to Delaware I will contact you!

yap for the sake of your baby..don't stress yourself...you and the baby will fine...just pray that god will guide you

Thank you!

Just want to leave a huge hug,and say although you have a challenge ahead of you it will pass and before you know it you will have a beautiful baby to consume your time and mind!!!!

Its normal to have many fears during pregnancy so add your circumstances and you're bound to feel shakey.

The other posters have made some great suggestions,I def think joining pregnancy groups ect would help.Get as much external support around you that you can.Then if you need it,it's there.

Im sure everything will work out,while your husbands away get busy making a baby diary about your thoughts and feelings,cut out pictures of items youd like to buy,strollers,nursery furniture ect......so you can show it to your husband on his return and he can share the ideas youve had and the feelings you've felt.

Lots of luck and keep us posted on your progress!!!!!

Thank you! I will do the journal that you suggested

I wear no uniforms, no blues or greens.But, I am in the military, in the ranks rarely seen.I have no rank upon my shoulders. Salutes I do not give.But in the military world is where I live.I am not in the chain of command, orders I do not give or get.But my husband is the one who does, this I can not forget.I am not the one who fires a weapon, Who puts his life on the line.But my job is just as tough, I’m the one who is always left behind.My husband is a patriot, a brave and pride filled man.And the call to serve his country not all can understand.Behind the lines, I see things needed to keep this country free.My husband makes the sacrifice, but so do my kids and me.I love the man I married. The military is his life.So I pledge to support my hero and stand among the silent ranks known as THE MILITARY WIFE.

I spent 10 years in the Marine corps and always thought the wives and kids suffered the most.

We appreciate what your family does for our country and we support you in our thoughts everyday.

Thank you for your service!

Aww that's a beautiful quote! Thank you as well for your service

I have no advice but I hope everything works out well for you and your family *hug*

Thank you!!

AUGGG........congrats, next yr this time U'll look back and call it a good experience, not minimizing the situation but I just know U will be OK, join a support group of ppl with buns in the oven, if U R up to it do some walkin at the park with your

birthing coach, get your in-laws or good friend to video tape the birth , try and stay positive, look at the baby things U

have so far & smile, dont go feeling sorry for yourself...............fast forward & think about all the loving,nurturing,

quality time is to come when he returns because an idle mind with pity brewing is depression playground, also pray

Thank you for your advice!

Hi there! Glad that you slept good last night. You are a good and smart woman with a loving husband. I understand how your feel, but everything will pass so no worry too much. Please try to enjoy your pregnancy and if you feel depress, try listening to good music, it is relaxing and good for your baby as well. Time is fast, sure you will be fine and happy especially when you see your little one soon. Congratulations and God bless you and your husband. Take care

Thank you!!!

Thank you everyone!! You have all been so kind

[Catarina 0]

Oh sweety, hang in there!! Talk to your baby, occupy your time with work and some hobbies...redecorate your home to welcome your brave husband! mommy will be there soon and a beautiful baby too! The baby will take over your time and before you know it your husband will be back home for you!!!

"you never know how strong you are until your only option is to be strong" :)

Best wishes for you guys!!!

[Holly2234 66]

I want to recommend this website http://babyandbump.momtastic.com/ There are a lot of military wives on there so its a great place to find people in a similar situation, maybe even in your area while also getting pregnancy advice and support.

The people that said call if you need anything, they probably mean anything at all! Even if you just want to get a coffee with them and have some company be sure to call them. There doesn't need to be an emergency

The next year will go so fast especially with a baby. Take loads of photo's and spend time arranging them into order so your husband doesnt miss anything and to keep you busy.

The best of luck for the rest of your pregnancy

Edited September 8, 2012 by Holly2234