Will Republican platform "human life amendment" require a brand new government bureacracy to count the unborn?

[JohnR! 5,495]

That doesn't detect fertilization. Life begins at fertilization, not before.

One can always contend that the swimmers are already alive...

[^_^ 5,021]

Hmm.. Well maybe a good start would be to install CCTV in every house and car? That way they can monitor most of your movements?

Same problem. How do you detect fertilization? If a fertilized egg is a person, it must be counted!

One can always contend that the swimmers are already alive...

The Human Life Amendment as advocated by the GOP official platform says life begins at fertilization. Not before.

[JohnR! 5,495]

The Human Life Amendment as advocated by the GOP official platform says life begins at fertilization. Not before.

On the upside we will be able to shave 9 months off their retirement... and everyone will have their first birthday at 3-months of age, approximately!

[rocks 494]

Same problem. How do you detect fertilization? If a fertilized egg is a person, it must be counted!

The real problem is that a pregnancy test isn't accurate until about a month has elapsed since the last menstrual cycle... Maybe the Republicans need to put more funding into getting pregnancy tests that can detect fertilization?

[^_^ 5,021]

The real problem is that a pregnancy test isn't accurate until about a month has elapsed since the last menstrual cycle... Maybe the Republicans need to put more funding into getting pregnancy tests that can detect fertilization?

Let's pretend this technology exists, is cheap and portable and widely available at CVS and Walgreens.

How would we deploy such technology so the federal agency responsible for keeping an accurate count of persons can do its job effectively?

[mawilson 2,133]

That doesn't detect fertilization. Life begins at fertilization, not before.

The government will be instantly notified whenever there's sexual activity which results in the deposition of sperm in ####### or the cervical channel, and a government-appointed bureaucrat will be promptly dispatched to the woman's house to perform more tests (all paid for by Obamacare, of course.)

[^_^ 5,021]

The government will be instantly notified whenever there's sexual activity which results in the deposition of sperm in ####### or the cervical channel, and a government-appointed bureaucrat will be promptly dispatched to the woman's house to perform more tests (all paid for by Obamacare, of course.)

That leaves too much room for error. A woman could take advantage of any combination of pharmaceutical products to end the life of the person inside her before the bureaucrat arrives.

No, fertilization detection must be automated and transparent to the public.

[rocks 494]

Let's pretend this technology exists, is cheap and portable and widely available at CVS and Walgreens.

How would we deploy such technology so the federal agency responsible for keeping an accurate count of persons can do its job effectively?

Every woman should be forced to do it every day before breakfast. I'm all for spending more money on stuff, sanitary products aren't expensive enough.

[JohnR! 5,495]

Every woman should be forced to do it every day before breakfast. I'm all for spending more money on stuff, sanitary products aren't expensive enough.

I would say the test should be taken at least three times a day, just in case.

Edited August 21, 2012 by Gegel

[mawilson 2,133]

That leaves too much room for error. A woman could take advantage of any combination of pharmaceutical products to end the life of the person inside her before the bureaucrat arrives.

You mean illegal pharmaceutical products? Clearly the government will have to ban those.

[rocks 494]

I would say the test should be taken at least three times a day, just in case.

You're right. Women should be required to pee in a cup at least 3 times a day, just in case. The cup must be carried with them at all times.

[JohnR! 5,495]

You're right. Women should be required to pee in a cup at least 3 times a day, just in case. The cup must be carried with them at all times.

Of course this being a GOP initiative, you can expect all these little details to be outlined in a plan and made into law, with an appropriate government agency created to oversee that the law is being respected. Same agency will be responsible to control other aspects of your sex life, for after all, they are already in your bedroom, so why not?

[mawilson 2,133]

No, fertilization detection must be automated and transparent to the public.

That's not going to create jobs. A government bureaucrat to police 5-10 sexually active women - imagine how many government jobs will be created.

[rocks 494]

That's not going to create jobs. A government bureaucrat to police 5-10 sexually active women - imagine how many government jobs will be created.

I thought Republicans hated the government? Now I'm confused.

[JohnR! 5,495]

I thought Republicans hated the government? Now I'm confused.

They hate government intrusion in their lives, but love it and are all for it in the lives of others....