Why meeting the minimum poverty guidelines is not enough

[LSnBigBear 61]

I feel the need to discuss this topic as I have a friend that is struggling financially and was when he brought his now wife here last year. I want those that are unsure financially to hear first hand the stresses that go along if you do not have the finances currently to cover the entire process.

For my friend he lost his job during the process and took a 75% cut in pay which put him just above the minimum requirements.

He had to borrow from a friend for her plane ticket here and borrow again from family for her AOS. My friend is plus 50 years young in age too. So he is not a 20 year old doing the process.

His wife felt the need to return to her country due to family reasons so he borrowed again to get her back.. Now she wants to come back to USA (they are on good terms marriage wise) but he is broke again and cannot afford her return ticket.

So for those on the boarder line understand the costs associated with the process. Costs that don't come up now but will in time: Here are the fees and costs as I see it:

Filing K1 fee: $340

Her/His Interview: $240

Travel to the region she needs for her medical and interview. In our case with my fiancee traveling to Manila I am looking at $400 if she stays from medical to interview.

So now before her flight here the minimum is $980.

Then my travel (optional) for her interview. $1800 plus housing, food etc. Add another $1500 for two weeks minimum.

Then her travel coming to USA. $900

Small fees for SS card, marriage etc. $200 conservatively.

AOS $1000.

Minus my travel which is optional we are looking at $3000 call it.

If a person makes $20,000 annually note that it takes some time to save 3k.

I only share this as my friend is heart broken because he is broke and his wife wants to come home to him and he cannot get her here. I cannot loan him money due to my above and saving more as I want to make it to my fiancees interview.

He owes so many people all due to him only making the minimum requirements when she arrived in USA.

I just say think before you petition as it is not a cheap process. Good luck to everyone.

Edited July 22, 2012 by LSnBigBear

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

I feel the need to discuss this topic as I have a friend that is struggling financially and was when he brought his now wife here last year. I want those that are unsure financially to hear first hand the stresses that go along if you do not have the finances currently to cover the entire process.

For my friend he lost his job during the process and took a 75% cut in pay which put him just above the minimum requirements.

He had to borrow from a friend for her plane ticket here and borrow again from family for her AOS. My friend is plus 50 years young in age too. So he is not a 20 year old doing the process.

His wife felt the need to return to her country due to family reasons so he borrowed again to get her back.. Now she wants to come back to USA (they are on good terms marriage wise) but he is broke again and cannot afford her return ticket.

So for those on the boarder line understand the costs associated with the process. Costs that don't come up now but will in time: Here are the fees and costs as I see it:

Filing K1 fee: $340

Her/His Interview: $240

Travel to the region she needs for her medical and interview. In our case with my fiancee traveling to Manila I am looking at $400 if she stays from medical to interview.

So now before her flight here the minimum is $980.

Then my travel (optional) for her interview. $1800 plus housing, food etc. Add another $1500 for two weeks minimum.

Then her travel coming to USA. $900

Small fees for SS card, marriage etc. $200 conservatively.

AOS $1000.

Minus my travel which is optional we are looking at $3000 call it.

If a person makes $20,000 annually note that it takes some time to save 3k.

I only share this as my friend is heart broken because he is broke and his wife wants to come home to him and he cannot get her here. I cannot loan him money due to my above and saving more as I want to make it to my fiancees interview.

He owes so many people all due to him only making the minimum requirements when she arrived in USA.

I just say think before you petition as it is not a cheap process. Good luck to everyone.

1) Honey, the emergency is unfortunate but we don't have money to send you back home yet (remember I told you that I got that pay cut just after I filed for you?) and

2) Oh, honey, we don't have money to bring you back yet so kick back with your family for a while and I'll send you some money as I get it.

Easy peasy - there's no shame in honesty

[inlababo 1]

1) Honey, the emergency is unfortunate but we don't have money to send you back home yet (remember I told you that I got that pay cut just after I filed for you?) and

2) Oh, honey, we don't have money to bring you back yet so kick back with your family for a while and I'll send you some money as I get it.

Easy peasy - there's no shame in honesty

i agree!!!

[thinkerlove0212 158]

Occasionally on VJ you see this topic come up about putting a cost on love and the process. Some, I feel are either too young or naive in fully understanding the commitment to travel and learning a new life and culture. As with many stages of life no matter how prepared you think you are there will be speed bumps and hard issues to overcome. Many may have large incomes or savings or go into large debt. Some may think they can travel to Philippines once and meet only once before there spouse arrives in US. It takes love, patience, commitment and hard work for both, honesty and communication. Most marriages fail in US because of finances. When someone starts putting a price tag on love and life many issues will come up on both. True love will prevail in the end or its not meant to be. Both must be committed to each other for ups and downs and do what it takes.

[Azteca143 9]

Occasionally on VJ you see this topic come up about putting a cost on love and the process. Some, I feel are either too young or naive in fully understanding the commitment to travel and learning a new life and culture. As with many stages of life no matter how prepared you think you are there will be speed bumps and hard issues to overcome. Many may have large incomes or savings or go into large debt. Some may think they can travel to Philippines once and meet only once before there spouse arrives in US. It takes love, patience, commitment and hard work for both, honesty and communication. Most marriages fail in US because of finances. When someone starts putting a price tag on love and life many issues will come up on both. True love will prevail in the end or its not meant to be. Both must be committed to each other for ups and downs and do what it takes.

:thumbs:

[abner137 48]

There's a reason it's not called the middle class guidelines..........

[thinkerlove0212 158]

There's a reason it's not called the middle class guidelines..........

what are you implying? Only the older or rich can use the guides? or find love overseas?

[Tahoma 2,292]

Thanks for your post, BigBear.

I agree that people should "think before you petition." Budgeting is not only important during the immigration process, but all throughout life. Budgeting is not "putting a price on love." It's what responsible people do to better manage their finances, and to prevent situations like the one your friend finds himself in.

How is it that your friend previously was making a very good income, yet he had virtually no savings cushion? At his previous income level, it seems to me that he should have had more than enough savings to get through the visa process. Do you feel he has a spending problem?

[abner137 48]

what are you implying? Only the older or rich can use the guides? or find love overseas?

No, I'm saying it's called Poverty Guidelines, not Middle Class or Wealthy Guidelines.....Not saying anything....I'm just sayin....

But...imho, anyone who doesn't exceed those minimums is just asking for trouble trying to support a newcomer to the country, they should be 200%..........

[VanessaTony 3,567]

No, I'm saying it's called Poverty Guidelines, not Middle Class or Wealthy Guidelines.....Not saying anything....I'm just sayin....

But...imho, anyone who doesn't exceed those minimums is just asking for trouble trying to support a newcomer to the country, they should be 200%..........

I think it should depend entirely on where you live. They're fine for where I live, but for other places, and other people's lifestyles, it just isn't enough.

[LSnBigBear 61]

Thanks for your post, BigBear.

I agree that people should "think before you petition." Budgeting is not only important during the immigration process, but all throughout life. Budgeting is not "putting a price on love." It's what responsible people do to better manage their finances, and to prevent situations like the one your friend finds himself in.

How is it that your friend previously was making a very good income, yet he had virtually no savings cushion? At his previous income level, it seems to me that he should have had more than enough savings to get through the visa process. Do you feel he has a spending problem?

I don't know his spending habits as I met him in 2009 in Japan as we were both traveling to Phils. He has been in sales making about six digits until about 2 years ago right after he started the process. I can attest that when you take a 70-75% pay decrease savings and investments gets cashed in to survive. How long can most people in the 50-100k range survive if all of a sudden their pay decreases by 2/3's For many people they used the 6 month rule in savings for survival. I for one went 22 months between jobs for the first time in my life. It was terrible feeling. I as well settled for 2/3 less money. The only difference is I have a fixed salary and his is commission based.

I am not sticking up for him but more trying to let others know that doing this process can be expensive in more of lump sums. I have told friends that if I dated an American woman I would be spending 50-100 a week on dates. This is more of having to save and prioritize.

Thanks for your comments. Good dialogue.

[LSnBigBear 61]

what are you implying? Only the older or rich can use the guides? or find love overseas?

Definantly not older is safe anymore as my buddy is 58 and is having troubles with money and survival. Many retirees are back to work due to the economy..

People should just understand the costs prior to starting this process. It is stressful enough without the financial difficulties it presents.

Edited July 23, 2012 by LSnBigBear

[thinkerlove0212 158]

Definantly not older is safe anymore as my buddy is 58 and is having troubles with money and survival. Many retirees are back to work due to the economy..

People should just understand the costs prior to starting this process. It is stressful enough without the financial difficulties it presents.

what is considered middle class now in US is a blurred line in this quicksand economy when so called middle class cant keep up.

[habibi11 16]

I feel the need to discuss this topic as I have a friend that is struggling financially and was when he brought his now wife here last year. I want those that are unsure financially to hear first hand the stresses that go along if you do not have the finances currently to cover the entire process.

For my friend he lost his job during the process and took a 75% cut in pay which put him just above the minimum requirements.

He had to borrow from a friend for her plane ticket here and borrow again from family for her AOS. My friend is plus 50 years young in age too. So he is not a 20 year old doing the process.

His wife felt the need to return to her country due to family reasons so he borrowed again to get her back.. Now she wants to come back to USA (they are on good terms marriage wise) but he is broke again and cannot afford her return ticket.

So for those on the boarder line understand the costs associated with the process. Costs that don't come up now but will in time: Here are the fees and costs as I see it:

Filing K1 fee: $340

Her/His Interview: $240

Travel to the region she needs for her medical and interview. In our case with my fiancee traveling to Manila I am looking at $400 if she stays from medical to interview.

So now before her flight here the minimum is $980.

Then my travel (optional) for her interview. $1800 plus housing, food etc. Add another $1500 for two weeks minimum.

Then her travel coming to USA. $900

Small fees for SS card, marriage etc. $200 conservatively.

AOS $1000.

Minus my travel which is optional we are looking at $3000 call it.

If a person makes $20,000 annually note that it takes some time to save 3k.

I only share this as my friend is heart broken because he is broke and his wife wants to come home to him and he cannot get her here. I cannot loan him money due to my above and saving more as I want to make it to my fiancees interview.

He owes so many people all due to him only making the minimum requirements when she arrived in USA.

I just say think before you petition as it is not a cheap process. Good luck to everyone.

Edited July 23, 2012 by habibi11

[habibi11 16]

I don't know his spending habits as I met him in 2009 in Japan as we were both traveling to Phils. He has been in sales making about six digits until about 2 years ago right after he started the process. I can attest that when you take a 70-75% pay decrease savings and investments gets cashed in to survive. How long can most people in the 50-100k range survive if all of a sudden their pay decreases by 2/3's For many people they used the 6 month rule in savings for survival. I for one went 22 months between jobs for the first time in my life. It was terrible feeling. I as well settled for 2/3 less money. The only difference is I have a fixed salary and his is commission based.

I am not sticking up for him but more trying to let others know that doing this process can be expensive in more of lump sums. I have told friends that if I dated an American woman I would be spending 50-100 a week on dates. This is more of having to save and prioritize.

Thanks for your comments. Good dialogue.

it is tough....Did his wife not work before she came here to help with the process in anyway.... it is tough to have to support both people but its love and u cant put a price on it.... he should have been honest with her and said sorry we just dont have the funds right now and like any good marriage she will understand....