Divorce

[pittman1971 0]

Honestly it sounds like she was using you for money from the very beginning. I'm surprised you fell for that. But regardless, you're now going to have to prove that YOU did not enter into this marriage for the purposes of getting her a green card - which may be hard to do given the fact that you declared here that she flat out offered you $ before you ever got married.

You need to get a very very good immigration attorney (not to mention divorce attorney).

Hmmm. If he alleges she married solely for immigration benefit, the onus is on her to disprove. I don't believe the USC has to prove anything other than his suspicion has merit.

Thanks everyone for your replys.

I may sound ignorant but I really want to make this marriage work because I do love her even with all that has happened. I guess love is blind. I am only human and can only put up with so much, when I feel there is no more hope and if she goes then my only choice will be divorce.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Maybe not, but geez. I can't hardly think of a bigger red flag to indicate possible fraud.

Regardless, I hope the OP can get it sorted out.

Well, I'd be inclined to say that the USC testimony carries a little more weight than an alien's in some situations. If there were a paper trail, then I'd say that could change the complexion dramatically. However, you have a good point, and that is that if Pittman were to wish to report this to ICE, then mention of her offer of money in exchange should be worded carefully.

[adrianiux 0]

I agree with Tracy, she was and she is still using you. I could understand that she feels like lost in this country since she just left family behind her, I think all of us non US citizens knows about this, because we have gone through this once we came here. But there is something call respect, dignity, love, VALUES, we grow up with them. But I think she doesn't know them. Unfortunately, there is a baby here, and he is innocent. If you have to do something, just try to keep your babe with you, she was able to leave in Mexico to her own daughter so sooner or later she can do the same thing with your babe. And...just leave her, if she wants to go...ok let her go, because the more you try to keep her with you, the more she is going to hate you. I'm sorry not for you Pittman, because you deserve someone better than her, and you will find her, but I'm sorry for her, because she is so selfish that can't see what she has in front of her and opportunities of a love like that...I think just once in life.

Good luck!

[dmartmar 1]

"I wish she would at least try or tell me the truth that she married me for legal status."

Dude, the fact she not only asked you before marriage how to become a resident in the states, but that she also offered you $2,000 on top of that right after you told her "by marrying a US citizen" should VERY CLEARLY answer your own question!!!

[dmartmar 1]

One more thing.

If you agree with her, let her go and take the papers with her anyway, she'll go to Memphis, who knows if to reunite with some long lost lover or even her then unknown-to-you husband from Mexico, eventually get a green card by filing the "bona fide" marriage waiver and using your baby as the main evidence, then afterwards sponsor her "illegal" familiy members there and her daughter back home, all thanks to your generosity.

If you don't agree, then speak to both a Family Law and Immigration atty. regarding your options, first and foremost. I would talk to the Immigration atty. more than anyone else at this point and don't EVER MENTION NONE OF THIS to her.

My ex-wife from Argentina tried to pull the same stunt on me, but luckily I came out on top and got her to leave the states. I reported she had married me fraudulently for immigration benefits to the USCIS and asked that they withdraw her application and my sponsorship. Having submitted so much evidence backing up my claim, about two months later they sent her a letter acknowledging they had withdrawn everything and giving her the option of leaving voluntarily or face deportation. Of course, she chose the former. Exactly a month after we married she also wanted to have a baby with me. Thank God it didn't happen!

[kaydee457 13]

Dude, the fact she not only asked you before marriage how to become a resident in the states, but that she also offered you $2,000 on top of that right after you told her "by marrying a US citizen" should VERY CLEARLY answer your own question!!!

Ditto! To the O.P. I would like to understand, given the solicitation that you assert she made prior to the blooming of your "relationship", how is it that you could ever believe this relationship was based on anything but deception?

She was clearly on a mission. Did you not see this? You wonder now that it may be fraudulent?

In my opinion, guys like you make this process over bearing for the rest of us....

Sorry, but you clearly got youself into this and now you need to get yourself out of it.

There aren't any answers in these forums for you.

Find a lawyer.

[Fandango 1,439]

Dude, the fact she not only asked you before marriage how to become a resident in the states, but that she also offered you $2,000 on top of that right after you told her "by marrying a US citizen" should VERY CLEARLY answer your own question!!!

Ditto! To the O.P. I would like to understand, given the solicitation that you assert she made prior to the blooming of your "relationship", how is it that you could ever believe this relationship was based on anything but deception?

She was clearly on a mission. Did you not see this? You wonder now that it may be fraudulent?

In my opinion, guys like you make this process over bearing for the rest of us....

Sorry, but you clearly got youself into this and now you need to get yourself out of it.

There aren't any answers in these forums for you.

Find a lawyer.

To the op...even tho I agree with everything above, I am sorry that you're going thru this.

Edited January 31, 2006 by LisaD

[meauxna 15]

Now here is another example: On August 17th, 2005 my wife called me and said she was crossing the border illegal again because she had no money. In July i was there and gave her 500 plus bought enough diapers for the month. She wanted to cross the border and go to memphis for work. Well I'm in Louisiana, I asked her why not come to Louisiana. She said she had a job in Memphis and would come see me when she could. I was in a panic and sent her 710 dollars, she stayed in mexico. On September 10th I was back in mexico and she had no money. I asked what happened to the money I sent, she said she owed it to her mom. I find that strange that in a months time she spent 500 and then had to borrow another 710. She had no bills.

Didn't you post about this at the time?

Anyway, what's your desired outcome? Work toward that.

[chispas 0]

Sounds like you need to talk to an attorney ( and appropriate therapist )quickly. Sometimes emotion can get in the way of logic and cloud the decisions. Also, what else is in Memphis besides the family? Please don't walk to find a solution, RUN!

panamachic

[meddykomp 0]

Tell her to leave without her son, and see what she sez...

I agree. Maybe she won't be so anxious to go then.

Often, even a full-custodial parent has to demonstrate legitimate reason to remove a child to another state.

This is very true. I have custody of my daughter and I can only move within 50 miles of the last home I had with my daughters father. That could be different in your state of course, but judges are getting more and more sympathetic to fathers anyway.

[Mr. Big Dog 10,747]

Anyway, what's your desired outcome? Work toward that.

I thought the disired outcome was a working marriage...

I may sound ignorant but I really want to make this marriage work because I do love her even with all that has happened.

...and from all that I've read, that does not seem to be an option that's on the table from her point of view. Since it takes two to tango, seems that working towards his "desired" outcome would be a rather futile undertaking.

I still can't see how one can be that blind. Surely there were enough warning flags. Bright red ones. Hell, some were even on fire.

[dmartmar 1]

"Now here is another example: On August 17th, 2005 my wife called me and said she was crossing the border illegal again because she had no money. In July i was there and gave her 500 plus bought enough diapers for the month. She wanted to cross the border and go to memphis for work. Well I'm in Louisiana, I asked her why not come to Louisiana. She said she had a job in Memphis and would come see me when she could. I was in a panic and sent her 710 dollars, she stayed in mexico. On September 10th I was back in mexico and she had no money. I asked what happened to the money I sent, she said she owed it to her mom. I find that strange that in a months time she spent 500 and then had to borrow another 710. She had no bills."

So "out of nowhere" she had $2,000 to bribe you with into agreeing marrying her for immigration benefits, but to cover the above expenses she never had any money for.

[Fandango 1,439]

"Now here is another example: On August 17th, 2005 my wife called me and said she was crossing the border illegal again because she had no money. In July i was there and gave her 500 plus bought enough diapers for the month. She wanted to cross the border and go to memphis for work. Well I'm in Louisiana, I asked her why not come to Louisiana. She said she had a job in Memphis and would come see me when she could. I was in a panic and sent her 710 dollars, she stayed in mexico. On September 10th I was back in mexico and she had no money. I asked what happened to the money I sent, she said she owed it to her mom. I find that strange that in a months time she spent 500 and then had to borrow another 710. She had no bills."

So "out of nowhere" she had $2,000 to bribe you with into agreeing marrying her for immigration benefits, but to cover the above expenses she never had any money for.

that's an excellent point

[diadromous mermaid 36]

"Now here is another example: On August 17th, 2005 my wife called me and said she was crossing the border illegal again because she had no money. In July i was there and gave her 500 plus bought enough diapers for the month. She wanted to cross the border and go to memphis for work. Well I'm in Louisiana, I asked her why not come to Louisiana. She said she had a job in Memphis and would come see me when she could. I was in a panic and sent her 710 dollars, she stayed in mexico. On September 10th I was back in mexico and she had no money. I asked what happened to the money I sent, she said she owed it to her mom. I find that strange that in a months time she spent 500 and then had to borrow another 710. She had no bills."

So "out of nowhere" she had $2,000 to bribe you with into agreeing marrying her for immigration benefits, but to cover the above expenses she never had any money for.

I don't follow your thought. The OP has already (in historical posts as well as here) suggested his wife had fairly affluent family members but did have a shopping habit. The money he was sending was to support a family of three, his wife and two children.

[dmartmar 1]

"I don't follow your thought."

That's great! 'Cause my post wasn't meant to be followed by you, nor anyone else on these forums for that matter.