Need help, I am very worried...

[Ihavequestions 419]

Dangit, so that name is out?

I'll only tell what the name is not.

Other than that, I'm running out of applicable tuneage.

[nurse1967 287]

Hahah you girls are off the chain today! I am non-muslim.....guess I don't count either!! :}

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

I just hope everything is OK... she mentioned his severe asthma problem... it would be really horrible if he was in the hospital (or God forbid worse) and she had no way of knowing...

[Lisamarie 79]

I hope so too. And I hope she will come back and tell us since we're all thinking about her and hoping for the best.

I just hope everything is OK... she mentioned his severe asthma problem... it would be really horrible if he was in the hospital (or God forbid worse) and she had no way of knowing...

[NY_BX 397]

Alrighty, I did my part.

I, the non-Muslim in this here MO, tend to agree. Since when does the potential future wife have to convert? Yeah, and that stuff about not dating or talking on the phone? That's, ah, also in the somewhat untrue category ... and probably borders on WTH.

Lookie here, sistah, I am the MO Music Conductor Extraordinaire, and I'm DJing the tunes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBWOdASBjm0

Yo sistah! Loving it!

Not only I am a non-Muslim, I am an activist against organized religion, LOL! My parents are visiting from Puerto Rico and my mom just gave 'her humble opinion speech' to my husband. We're still married......

[NY_BX 397]

I just hope everything is OK... she mentioned his severe asthma problem... it would be really horrible if he was in the hospital (or God forbid worse) and she had no way of knowing...

Bottom line, I think we all agree- Muslim, non-Muslim, Atheists, Olympians and Queen fans- that we wish he is ok and he's not lying to her.

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

I hope so too. And I hope she will come back and tell us since we're all thinking about her and hoping for the best.

[hoping4happiness 1]

Ok everyone, just stopping by to give an update.

A lady from this forum who's in Egypt had a male friend call him. He says he is fine! Phew!

So that just leaves the question of why he was MIA for a while... Very strange and unlike him. More than a bit inconsiderate, in my opinion. Usually, when one of us knows we will be gone for a while, we let the other know when, why and how long. So this was just strange. They asked him to contact me, so we will see if he does.

Part of me is very thankful that he is ok. But another part of me says "Ok, but what was going on then?" All we know is that he is "fine". But I guess only he can answer that...

As others have suggested, I might like to think good of him, yes. But still I have been worrying all along about all kinds of things, like does he just not care if I worry? What does that say about his seriousness? Is he there visiting a wife or something? Is that why he can't talk to me? Is he REALLY completely and legally divorced??

But see I wouldn't be freaking out about things like that, if he hadn't disappeared that way, lol.

I'm guess I'm just going to have to be cautious. I won't assume anything, or accuse him of anything unless I see some very solid proof, because that's just wrong. But at the very least, I have reasons to wonder...

[Lisamarie 79]

Well I'm glad he's "fine" and not in a hospital somewhere. But how long did you say it's been since you've been able to talk to him? I don't remember reading that.

[msheesha 548]

How long has it been since he has been out of touch, and how long has it been since the Egyptian male called him & said you were worried about him?

If others could get in touch with my fiancé yet he wasn't answering or responding when I called...not good. Being cautious is an extreme understatement about what you should do, in my opinion.

[NY_BX 397]

Ok everyone, just stopping by to give an update.

A lady from this forum who's in Egypt had a male friend call him. He says he is fine! Phew!

So that just leaves the question of why he was MIA for a while... Very strange and unlike him. More than a bit inconsiderate, in my opinion. Usually, when one of us knows we will be gone for a while, we let the other know when, why and how long. So this was just strange. They asked him to contact me, so we will see if he does.

Part of me is very thankful that he is ok. But another part of me says "Ok, but what was going on then?" All we know is that he is "fine". But I guess only he can answer that...

As others have suggested, I might like to think good of him, yes. But still I have been worrying all along about all kinds of things, like does he just not care if I worry? What does that say about his seriousness? Is he there visiting a wife or something? Is that why he can't talk to me? Is he REALLY completely and legally divorced??

But see I wouldn't be freaking out about things like that, if he hadn't disappeared that way, lol.

I'm guess I'm just going to have to be cautious. I won't assume anything, or accuse him of anything unless I see some very solid proof, because that's just wrong. But at the very least, I have reasons to wonder...

Good, he is ok. Now, bad, this is bad. There I said it. This is the typical behavior of someone- MENA man or not- that's running away from a situation. Some of the veterans here have already hinted of what could this abandonment means. Yes, abandonment. Better now, than after you petition for him. There's a reason why Egypt is on of the top 5 most fraudulents countries on immmigration.

Becareful....

[Lisamarie 79]

I agree........

How long has it been since he has been out of touch, and how long has it been since the Egyptian male called him & said you were worried about him?

If others could get in touch with my fiancé yet he wasn't answering or responding when I called...not good. Being cautious is an extreme understatement about what you should do, in my opinion.

[hoping4happiness 1]

Ok everyone, just stopping by to give an update.

A lady from this forum who's in Egypt had a male friend call him. He says he is fine! Phew!

So that just leaves the question of why he was MIA for a while... Very strange and unlike him. More than a bit inconsiderate, in my opinion. Usually, when one of us knows we will be gone for a while, we let the other know when, why and how long. So this was just strange. They asked him to contact me, so we will see if he does.

Part of me is very thankful that he is ok. But another part of me says "Ok, but what was going on then?" All we know is that he is "fine". But I guess only he can answer that...

As others have suggested, I might like to think good of him, yes. But still I have been worrying all along about all kinds of things, like does he just not care if I worry? What does that say about his seriousness? Is he there visiting a wife or something? Is that why he can't talk to me? Is he REALLY completely and legally divorced??

But see I wouldn't be freaking out about things like that, if he hadn't disappeared that way, lol.

I'm guess I'm just going to have to be cautious. I won't assume anything, or accuse him of anything unless I see some very solid proof, because that's just wrong. But at the very least, I have reasons to wonder...

Oh also-- Of course I know you don't have to convert to marry a muslim man, not if he is ok with it. I didn't convert because of him, lol. Just wanted to say that. When I was Christian, he really didn't care. The only thing he cared about was that he at the very least wanted to be with someone who believed in god. So as a former Christian, I guess I was covered on that, lol. I just studied Islam so much, because I always felt like my beliefs were extremely different from most other Christians I knew, and I noticed that Islam had a lot of the same beliefs I naturally had (ok, maybe a little more strict in a couple of areas, but hey, if you actually read the whole bible, it gets pretty strict too! lol). So I guess as I studied it, something just "clicked", lol.

Oh yeah, I know there are plenty of Muslims who do date, lol. But there are still also a lot who just go from single, to meeting someone, to engaged, lol. I guess I'm getting this from when I first started meeting a lot of Muslims--- I noticed that in the typical Western dating and engagement "process", most of my fellow Americans will live together for a couple years before they get married . In comparison to that, the Muslim meeting/engagement/marriage process almost seemed rushed in some cases.

And for a while, There was a short time before my man and I both agreed that we were definitely "exclusive", where I was kind of checking out the single muslim websites.... And I noticed that pretty much any single muslim guy who would talk to me was really insisting on getting married like... NOW! Even before we really knew each other. I mean they would be asking "So what's your decision on engagement/marriage?" like in the first few days! I would always have to be the one to say "WHOA! Slow down there guy..." lol. I'd tell them I want to talk to a person and find out as much as I can about who they are, and establish a friendship bond and LOVE, before I get married. I don't take forever to know and love someone,no, but I do at least want that to be in place. And they would always say, "Love grows when you're married, and 2 decent people can make it work if they are willing to try hard, no match is perfect, marriage is work." Etc., etc. And I would argue "Yes, but the more you know about a person before you marry them, the fewer big shocks there will be! And you can avoid a bad match much better that way." And they always had a reason why I was not entirely right, saying god wants us all to marry sooner rather than later, etc. lol. They each would tell me "This is the Muslim way."

And I would say, "Ok.... Well I may be Muslim, but I am still American, and I am still ME, so whoever I end up marrying will have to be ok with that."

I've never had this happen with any American guys. So I guess I was really just comparing my experiences talking to Western or Christian men, vs. Muslim men Huuuuuge difference in my experience, at least.

Edited July 3, 2012 by hoping4happiness

[NY_BX 397]

I agree........

I hate to say this, but I will say this: the whole thing sounds like he's not REALLY divorced and is trying to get it... you know for what. Once in the US and ready to move on, the ex-wife becomes the former ex..... you know.

I highly suggest to the OP to do extensive research in this matter. Ok ok ok ok I shouldn't be predicting. But some of us have seen this one-too-many times....

[NY_BX 397]

Ok everyone, just stopping by to give an update.

A lady from this forum who's in Egypt had a male friend call him. He says he is fine! Phew!

So that just leaves the question of why he was MIA for a while... Very strange and unlike him. More than a bit inconsiderate, in my opinion. Usually, when one of us knows we will be gone for a while, we let the other know when, why and how long. So this was just strange. They asked him to contact me, so we will see if he does.

Part of me is very thankful that he is ok. But another part of me says "Ok, but what was going on then?" All we know is that he is "fine". But I guess only he can answer that...

As others have suggested, I might like to think good of him, yes. But still I have been worrying all along about all kinds of things, like does he just not care if I worry? What does that say about his seriousness? Is he there visiting a wife or something? Is that why he can't talk to me? Is he REALLY completely and legally divorced??

But see I wouldn't be freaking out about things like that, if he hadn't disappeared that way, lol.

I'm guess I'm just going to have to be cautious. I won't assume anything, or accuse him of anything unless I see some very solid proof, because that's just wrong. But at the very least, I have reasons to wonder...

Oh also-- Of course I know you don't have to convert to marry a muslim man, not if he is ok with it. I didn't convert because of him, lol. Just wanted to say that. When I was Christian, he really didn't care. The only thing he cared about was that he at the very least wanted to be with someone who believed in god. So as a former Christian, I guess I was covered on that, lol. I just studied Islam so much, because I always felt like my beliefs were extremely different from most other Christians I knew, and I noticed that Islam had a lot of the same beliefs I naturally had (ok, maybe a little more strict in a couple of areas, but hey, if you actually read the whole bible, it gets pretty strict too! lol). So I guess as I studied it, something just "clicked", lol.

Oh yeah, I know there are plenty of Muslims who do date, lol. But there are still also a lot who just go from single, to meeting someone, to engaged, lol. I guess I'm getting this from when I first started meeting a lot of Muslims--- I noticed that in the typical Western dating and engagement "process", most of my fellow Americans will live together for a couple years before they get married . In comparison to that, the Muslim meeting/engagement/marriage process almost seemed rushed in some cases. And for a while, There was a short time before my man and I both agreed that we were definitely "exclusive", where I was kind of checking out the single muslim websites.... And I noticed that pretty much any single muslim guy who would talk to me was really insisting on getting married like... NOW! Even before we really knew each other. I mean he would be asking "So what's your decision on engagement/marriage?" like in the first few days! I would always have to be the one to say "WHOA! Slow down there guy..." lol. I'd tell him I want to talk to a person and find out as much as I can about who they are, and establish a friendship bond and LOVE, before I get married. I don't take forever to know and love someone, but I do want that to be in place. And he would always say, "Love grows when you're married, and 2 decent people can make it work if they are willing to try hard, no match is perfect, marriage is work." Etc., etc. And I would argue "Yes, but the more you know about a person before you marry them, the fewer big shocks there will be! And you can avoid a bad match much better that way." And he always had a reason why I was not entirely right, saying god wants us all to marry sooner rather than later, etc. lol. They each would tell me "This is the Muslim way."

And I would say, "Ok.... Well I may be Muslim, but I am still American, and I am still ME, so whoever I end up marrying will have to be ok with that."

I've never had this happen with any American guys. So I guess I was really just comparing my experiences talking to Western or Christian men, vs. Muslim men Huuuuuge difference in my experience, at least.

I really, really do not know who you've met, but, each experience is totally different. I know my now husband dated 3 women before me; each one for over a year. I even met one of them. I can't help to notice you mentioning visiting single muslim websites. Well, if you meet guys that are desperate to get out of the country, of course you will meet a handful of them that will say: "I love you; what was your name again?" Understand the difference.