Need help, I am very worried...

[Ihavequestions 419]

Can I be the conductor for the music in this Muslim Olympics? Or no?

[Ihavequestions 419]

Muslimy Muslimness

That thar is a gold medal winner!

[Sarah B 26]

Trust, this post and your others are getting sideeye from plenty of real life Muslims.

Because, despite all their Muslimy Muslimness, it still sounds straight up weird, for all kinds of reasons.

There are all kinds of cultural and family norms throughout MENA, for sure. Behaviors that were cool in the homes of lots of people I know who are also married to MENA guys wouldn't be cool in my husband's house, etc. But everything in this thread is really off the chain.

Muslimy Muslimness FTW!!

[Nasturtium 500]

Can I be the conductor for the music in this Muslim Olympics? Or no?

Yes! Opening ceremonies have commenced. First event: "I sayeth ctrl+v!" (aka copy and paste the longest and most esoteric evidence for your point possible!)

Because, despite all their Muslimy Muslimness, it still sounds straight up weird, for all kinds of reasons.

<3

[sandinista! 1,816]

Can I be the conductor for the music in this Muslim Olympics? Or no?

Yes, but I demand my intro be set to Black Betty, "if'n you please".

[sandinista! 1,816]

That thar is a gold medal winner!

My victory lap costume is off the hook, I promise! More glitter and sequins than a New Year's Eve party thrown by Elton John

Muslimy Muslimness FTW!!

Woot woot!

[sandinista! 1,816]

Yes! Opening ceremonies have commenced. First event: "I sayeth ctrl+v!" (aka copy and paste the longest and most esoteric evidence for your point possible!)

<3

Lol @ how cerebral you will steer this!

[sandinista! 1,816]

There has to a prize for working in culottes in the conversation. Sticking it to the patriarchy in Egypt through culottes and wedding day smooches. (I hope the culottes were not part of the wedding day wardrobe!)

I'm just playing Tamara

Everytime someone tries to say what a culture "norm" is for Egypt and I look back on our situation.... I guess we broke all the rules! We held hands in public, we kissed on our wedding day in front of family, i wore skirts, shorts to the knees, coulottes, tshirts, wore sleeveless shirt to swim in over my bathing suit with short shorts, looked at male relatives and friends in their eyes without being thought of in a wrong way, slept in the same house as my husband before we were married (just slept in the room with his sister & mom) while he slept on the living room mattress, introduced to his family fairly quickly via webcam & phone, was known as a christian from the get go, was myself and didnt act like i was someone else trying to step on eggshells around him & his family. Oh well.... screw whatever the norm is. I love my life...

[Mithra 1,185]

Rofl Muslimy Muslimness!

I'm also loling about - " for the sake of the non-Muslims reading this - we do things differently...". And then only vaguely knows the rules about dating but has to be schooled by non-Muslims about mahr and divorce, etc. Oh noobs...they're precious aren't they?

[RFQ 110]

I pray everything is well ensha'Allah and the outcome is to your benefit one way or another.

I also hope that you don't take the condescending tones from some of posts, personally. Everyone (mostly I think o.o) is well meaning and have lots of good advice. The story is confusing and very fishy but life is odd and who knows whats up....

[NY_BX 397]

Trust, this post and your others are getting sideeye from plenty of real life Muslims.

Because, despite all their Muslimy Muslimness, it still sounds straight up weird, for all kinds of reasons.

There are all kinds of cultural and family norms throughout MENA, for sure. Behaviors that were cool in the homes of lots of people I know who are also married to MENA guys wouldn't be cool in my husband's house, etc. But everything in this thread is really off the chain.

It sounds very far-fetched. I agree...

[Mithra 1,185]

So the OP wasn't being condescending with her - "for the sake of the non-Muslims reading this....?"

I pray everything is well ensha'Allah and the outcome is to your benefit one way or another.

I also hope that you don't take the condescending tones from some of posts, personally. Everyone (mostly I think o.o) is well meaning and have lots of good advice. The story is confusing and very fishy but life is odd and who knows whats up....

Edited July 3, 2012 by Mithra

[NY_BX 397]

Rofl Muslimy Muslimness!

I'm also loling about - " for the sake of the non-Muslims reading this - we do things differently...". And then only vaguely knows the rules about dating but has to be schooled by non-Muslims about mahr and divorce, etc. Oh noobs...they're precious aren't they?

Isn't that, preaching to the choir? I know it sounds cliche, but this is a classic- cliche- example.

It seems this guy- the asthma patient fighting for his well-deserved financial portion- has 'indoctrinated' her into a muslimy muslimness tradition that is somewhat.... untrue.

Kat made her point with her portion of indoctrination: they say that to create a make-believe world and then..... boom!

And that part, is not exclusive to MENA muslims. We've heard the fraudulent stories one-too-many times. This sounds like 'another bites the dust.'

Sorry, had to make a Freddy Mercury reference.

[Nasturtium 500]

So the OP wasn't being condescending with her - "for the sake of the non-Muslims reading this....?"

Several non-Muslims had posted in this thread to help the OP prior to her comment. So I felt that was dismissive and insulting, especially after they had really tried to help. This isn't an Islamic forum, it's an immigration site. There happen to be a lot of Muslims in MENA here, but it's not an exclusive club. There is a sizable portion of non-Muslims and you're just as likely to be getting help from a non-Muslim as a Muslim.

I am glad IHQ is able to help. Whether or not we ever know the outcome, the important part is that the OP manages to figure out what's going on.

And yes, I agree that this should have been better worked out in the contract, so it doesn't really make much sense. Something is not what it seems. That doesn't mean that 100% surely the guy is wrong somehow, but it does mean that there needs to be closer examination. Better to find out and work these things through prior to the visa. Either it will make the relationship stronger or end something that isn't meant to be.

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

Several non-Muslims had posted in this thread to help the OP prior to her comment. So I felt that was dismissive and insulting, especially after they had really tried to help. This isn't an Islamic forum, it's an immigration site. There happen to be a lot of Muslims in MENA here, but it's not an exclusive club. There is a sizable portion of non-Muslims and you're just as likely to be getting help from a non-Muslim as a Muslim.

I am glad IHQ is able to help. Whether or not we ever know the outcome, the important part is that the OP manages to figure out what's going on.

And yes, I agree that this should have been better worked out in the contract, so it doesn't really make much sense. Something is not what it seems. That doesn't mean that 100% surely the guy is wrong somehow, but it does mean that there needs to be closer examination. Better to find out and work these things through prior to the visa. Either it will make the relationship stronger or end something that isn't meant to be.

I don't know if she intended to be condescending (although it did kind of rub the wrong way when posted in this particular forum.) Sometimes, when people discover something new - something that maybe they or their family or their social circle has been previously completely unfamiliar with - they have the perception that it may well be something many other people don't know much about, either. I think she was just enthusing... but she has landed in the lap of long experience now

I love your last graph more than cooked food.