very improtant forum

[Karen_L 1]

... or married fat women (this is not a love marriage ) trust me ...

So does that mean that fat women have no right to be loved by someone?

Waste of time pointing this out, but I just couldn't help myself!

Think before you post!

< sarcasm >

Fat women are to be ridiculed and/or ignored until they die. Its obvious that anyone more than 5 lbs overweight (10 at the most) doesn't deserve love or happiness or to meet someone they get along with and have fun with. Also, it's pretty obvious that love is based upon a person's physical appearence, so anyone who doesn't conform with American movie-starlet stick-thinness (which is, obviously, the only understanding of beauty anyone can possibly have), could never be loved by anyone. Thus, any overweight person who is married to a foreigner is clearly being used by that person for entrance into the USA. DUH, Anyta! lol

< / sarcasm >

How come I didn't see this before?????

Thanks for opening my eyes Karen_L, and for making me envision what life for women is all about! Gosh I have been leaving a lie all my life!

I need to go home and tell my husband that we need a divorce, since I am overweight he must have been pretending for the past 4 years!

LOL if being overweight means you have to get divorced, I would have to go file after work today lol

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Thank God we know this now! How could we have all been so blind? Wake up VJers!

I just want to add that one only needs to come to Newport Beach to see that marrying for money or social status is not unique to foreign spouses. Marriage is as much a farce with some Americans as it is for anyone else. Unfortunately there are no laws against marrying someone to better one's life ...and in a sense, aren't we all doing just that?

hee hee hee, I've, uh, seen the OC... But in the same vein, I think most people aren't THAT naive, and they probably know that there is a reason their spouse was specifically contacting Americans from an internet cafe in Algeria, joined a dating service to meet American men touring Eastern Europe, or a web site to meet Filipinas. Even if it is an arrangement, who are we to judge and say that those people shouldn't be happy with a relationship that may have started with desire for a greencard and blossomed into something else?

The institution of marriage is changing, and it's not harming America any to allow legal immigrants to enter our country for the purpose of making a better life for themselves.

Hm, this is kind of incoherent...I swear I had a point in there somewhere...

hehehe...are you floating on cloud 9 right now? It's nice to be approved, yes?

[Alex+R 0]

Thank God we know this now! How could we have all been so blind? Wake up VJers!

I just want to add that one only needs to come to Newport Beach to see that marrying for money or social status is not unique to foreign spouses. Marriage is as much a farce with some Americans as it is for anyone else. Unfortunately there are no laws against marrying someone to better one's life ...and in a sense, aren't we all doing just that?

hee hee hee, I've, uh, seen the OC... But in the same vein, I think most people aren't THAT naive, and they probably know that there is a reason their spouse was specifically contacting Americans from an internet cafe in Algeria, joined a dating service to meet American men touring Eastern Europe, or a web site to meet Filipinas. Even if it is an arrangement, who are we to judge and say that those people shouldn't be happy with a relationship that may have started with desire for a greencard and blossomed into something else?

The institution of marriage is changing, and it's not harming America any to allow legal immigrants to enter our country for the purpose of making a better life for themselves.

Hm, this is kind of incoherent...I swear I had a point in there somewhere...

hehehe...are you floating on cloud 9 right now? It's nice to be approved, yes?

Yes I jumped up and down so much I lost a shoe, and I still haven't recovered it. And this apartment isn't that big...

[Ban Hammer 13,678]

hehehe...are you floating on cloud 9 right now? It's nice to be approved, yes?

Yes I jumped up and down so much I lost a shoe, and I still haven't recovered it. And this apartment isn't that big...

you are? congratulations

[Savanphil 3]

**Singing**

Be a troll! Be a troll!

Let disruption be your goal -

Anything that you can do to draw attention to your role

Egoboo can be nice

Get your fix at any price

You can make entire newsgroups into clucking little birdcoops

Be a troll! Be a troll!

Pound their patience into coal

Tell the regulars they have no sense of flair

Insult their mothers too and their manners, pfoo!

Be a troll, be a troll, be a troll!

Edited October 18, 2006 by Savanphil

[daveandlirio 0]

I dunno. I'm not a fan of marriage fraud (although going through this process sort of makes you wonder why anyone does this without love, unless they are paid like 10k+ to do it) but there are all kinds of fine lines.

Is my case marriage fraud? I don't really want to be "married" but I want to live with Rey in my country. I turned 23 2 weeks ago. I'm not having a wedding and I don't have a diamond or anything. I always thought I'd stay unmarried unless I had children, so marriage for me is very much a means to an end, although that end is still a romantic relationship.

Hmmm, red flags go up when you say you really don't want to be married and that it is just a means to an end. Does your partner understand how you feel? Marriage is such an important and significant decision. And the pain of a failed marriage, under most any circumstances, is monumental. I say that because I have been there twice before - it really hurts all parties involved. Now, I'm about to marry for a third time and believe me I had to think long and hard about making that commitment again. And, I'm not blind to the fact that this marriage may fail as well. However, I have a great deal of faith in my partner and her intentions as well as a strong understanding of my own. The divorce rate in the United States is astronomical and I believe it is probably even greater for marriages to partners from abroad.

Anyway, I'm on my soapbox, but I would ask, as a VJ friend, that you talk with your partner about your feelings with respect to wanting to marry as a means to an end versus due to a loving desire for the permanent union of marriage.

Just my two cents...take it for what it's worth.

Good luck.

[aussiewench 9]

people from east europe africa asia rsussia and hispanic from south africa... love to travel to other countries to have a better life because where they are from are very poor so they decide to do any way to go to other countries ,there are many things that they do like having a fake passport they pay money for that and a lot of other ways to come to USA or Europe ,BUT there is an other way that make a lot of USC victims of ,its the internet lots of people get married now through the internet but they dont know what that person who is overseas wants(he wants to get the visa to come to USA)this is what he really wants if you look and search for the very small spot in his heart ,USA is everybody dream to come and live and work the Americans search for love so they do there best to bring husband and wives from other countries when the other half only wants the papers ,ok well everything is understood so far ...after the person come here that means his half of dream came true,whats the other half?? it is to obtain the permamnt residence (green card) not for 2 years he or she wants the green card for 10 years so they keep doing there tricks with spouse who doesnt know anhtyhing (i love you so much ,i die for you blah blah blah...)until he gets what he wants ,lots of Americans mailed a letter to home land security saying that they were used for green card but they cant do anything about it ,i wish people could know whats going on ,i means whats really behind this people who come here by marriage or whatever,this is what i hope Americans think about,i seen some people from other countries married old Americans 30 years older than he is even 40 years older than he is or married fat women (this is not a love marriage )trust me and you gotta know what you are doing ,this is the truth and if you dont believe in this there will come a day you will know ,

What a load of

[CarolineM 0]

i get what you are saying about the red flag thing -but I disagree. Here in America, you wanna live with someone, married or not, you can do it. Not everyone WANTS to get married...By making marriage a condition for immigration, someone elses values are being placed on us. People co-habit all the time - whether you agree with it or not...look at kurt russell and goldie hawn. They've lived together for AGES...longer than most marriages, but they aren't married.

For international couples - this really isn't an issue. I totally get what Alex is saying...she loves Rey and wants to spend the rest of her life with him, but the ONLY option to do this - is marriage. She isn't saying what I would think WOULD raise a red flag - which would be that she wants to use it as a dating visa...now THAT would be a red flag -

It's not really fair, but few things are...we deal with it, we move on.

Edited October 18, 2006 by CarolineM

[Traviesa 0]

I dunno. I'm not a fan of marriage fraud (although going through this process sort of makes you wonder why anyone does this without love, unless they are paid like 10k+ to do it) but there are all kinds of fine lines.

Is my case marriage fraud? I don't really want to be "married" but I want to live with Rey in my country. I turned 23 2 weeks ago. I'm not having a wedding and I don't have a diamond or anything. I always thought I'd stay unmarried unless I had children, so marriage for me is very much a means to an end, although that end is still a romantic relationship.

Hmmm, red flags go up when you say you really don't want to be married and that it is just a means to an end. Does your partner understand how you feel? Marriage is such an important and significant decision. And the pain of a failed marriage, under most any circumstances, is monumental. I say that because I have been there twice before - it really hurts all parties involved. Now, I'm about to marry for a third time and believe me I had to think long and hard about making that commitment again. And, I'm not blind to the fact that this marriage may fail as well. However, I have a great deal of faith in my partner and her intentions as well as a strong understanding of my own. The divorce rate in the United States is astronomical and I believe it is probably even greater for marriages to partners from abroad.

Anyway, I'm on my soapbox, but I would ask, as a VJ friend, that you talk with your partner about your feelings with respect to wanting to marry as a means to an end versus due to a loving desire for the permanent union of marriage.

Just my two cents...take it for what it's worth.

Good luck.

In response to that, and just as a thought to consider...it's entirely possible that, if given the option for your boyfriend/girlfriend to come live here for a while before deciding to get married, that a marriage may well result from that. Just because they don't necessarily want to get married right now, doesn't mean they wouldn't ever, and unfortunately, as far as options for two people to just live together, international couples are very limited.

[CarolineM 0]

as far as options for two people to just live together, international couples are very limited.

[Alex+R 0]

i get what you are saying about the red flag thing -but I disagree. Here in America, you wanna live with someone, married or not, you can do it. Not everyone WANTS to get married...By making marriage a condition for immigration, someone elses values are being placed on us. People co-habit all the time - whether you agree with it or not...look at kurt russell and goldie hawn. They've lived together for AGES...longer than most marriages, but they aren't married.

For international couples - this really isn't an issue. I totally get what Alex is saying...she loves Rey and wants to spend the rest of her life with him, but the ONLY option to do this - is marriage. She isn't saying what I would think WOULD raise a red flag - which would be that she wants to use it as a dating visa...now THAT would be a red flag -

It's not really fair, but few things are...we deal with it, we move on.

Yep that's pretty much the deal. I can see how if I wanted to just live together but Rey really wanted a big wedding and holy matrimony etc. it would certainly be a problem, but we're both on the same page. We were already cohabitating before I went back home and we just want s'more of that. But I don't understand how someone could do the K1 visa process if they didn't know whether or not they wanted to go through with it! Yikes.

Actually the only reason I posted that was to provide an example of how deciding whether someone is using a marriage visa properly is not always so black and white.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Thank God we know this now! How could we have all been so blind? Wake up VJers!

I just want to add that one only needs to come to Newport Beach to see that marrying for money or social status is not unique to foreign spouses. Marriage is as much a farce with some Americans as it is for anyone else. Unfortunately there are no laws against marrying someone to better one's life ...and in a sense, aren't we all doing just that?

hee hee hee, I've, uh, seen the OC... But in the same vein, I think most people aren't THAT naive, and they probably know that there is a reason their spouse was specifically contacting Americans from an internet cafe in Algeria, joined a dating service to meet American men touring Eastern Europe, or a web site to meet Filipinas. Even if it is an arrangement, who are we to judge and say that those people shouldn't be happy with a relationship that may have started with desire for a greencard and blossomed into something else?

The institution of marriage is changing, and it's not harming America any to allow legal immigrants to enter our country for the purpose of making a better life for themselves.

Hm, this is kind of incoherent...I swear I had a point in there somewhere...

hehehe...are you floating on cloud 9 right now? It's nice to be approved, yes?

Yes I jumped up and down so much I lost a shoe, and I still haven't recovered it. And this apartment isn't that big...

hahahaha..I called Jinky before she went to sleep...she decided to have some coffee which she normally doesn't drink. We're both a bit out of our minds right now.

i get what you are saying about the red flag thing -but I disagree. Here in America, you wanna live with someone, married or not, you can do it. Not everyone WANTS to get married...By making marriage a condition for immigration, someone elses values are being placed on us. People co-habit all the time - whether you agree with it or not...look at kurt russell and goldie hawn. They've lived together for AGES...longer than most marriages, but they aren't married.

For international couples - this really isn't an issue. I totally get what Alex is saying...she loves Rey and wants to spend the rest of her life with him, but the ONLY option to do this - is marriage. She isn't saying what I would think WOULD raise a red flag - which would be that she wants to use it as a dating visa...now THAT would be a red flag -

It's not really fair, but few things are...we deal with it, we move on.

Good point. It would be nice if our government got out of the marriage business altogether. They should only recognize civil unions and leave marriage as a religious sacrament. Then we wouldn't have some people telling others who they can or cannot marry.

[CarolineM 0]

Ya know...in australia the give out de facto spouse visas...meaning you have lived together long enough to get the visa, but you don't have to get married.

they also give out same sex partner visas, hwoever, so they are a bit more progressive.

[JaJo 1]

OMG!!!! I think I'll cancel my K1 petition right now!

i seen some people from other countries married old Americans 30 years older than he is even 40 years older than he is

First sign right there...he's younger than me

or married fat women (this is not a love marriage )trust me

hmmm...I've been over weight all my life, so I guess I'll just crawl into a dark hole and stay there for the rest of my life, since I don't deserve to be loved...

to have a better life because where they are from are very poor

See? Another clear sign right here.

But, ops! Wait a minute. I am the foreign one here!

Sorry if someone used you to get a GC, but sometimes it's all about love, you know?

damn your worthless fraud hide... you need to repent sister....

Oh, brother...I just wrote my fiancé and told him all about my evil plot: bringing him here, seducing him with good coffee and the wild and crazy brazilian way of life...

I'm so ashamed of my acts...that I also had to tell the whole VJ community about it

And now I ask for your forgiveness

This is the American half of the JaJo super duo - I just had to step in and say that I forgive my dearest little jezebel. Some of you I'm sure know all too well how those Brazilians can weave their exotic wiles to ensnare the innnocent American (and the excellent coffee doesn't hurt either) - but, you know, I wouldn't trade a minute of it for all the world.

Actually, reading loveya's post, I can't help but wonder if my dearest is not getting the short end of the stick, and it isn't I who should be trying for a green card instead of her (do they have green cards in Brazil? I should inquire)

[Reynaldo 0]

OMG!!!! I think I'll cancel my K1 petition right now!

i seen some people from other countries married old Americans 30 years older than he is even 40 years older than he is

First sign right there...he's younger than me

or married fat women (this is not a love marriage )trust me

hmmm...I've been over weight all my life, so I guess I'll just crawl into a dark hole and stay there for the rest of my life, since I don't deserve to be loved...

to have a better life because where they are from are very poor

See? Another clear sign right here.

But, ops! Wait a minute. I am the foreign one here!

Sorry if someone used you to get a GC, but sometimes it's all about love, you know?

damn your worthless fraud hide... you need to repent sister....

Oh, brother...I just wrote my fiancé and told him all about my evil plot: bringing him here, seducing him with good coffee and the wild and crazy brazilian way of life...

I'm so ashamed of my acts...that I also had to tell the whole VJ community about it

And now I ask for your forgiveness

This is the American half of the JaJo super duo - I just had to step in and say that I forgive my dearest little jezebel. Some of you I'm sure know all too well how those Brazilians can weave their exotic wiles to ensnare the innnocent American (and the excellent coffee doesn't hurt either) - but, you know, I wouldn't trade a minute of it for all the world.

Actually, reading loveya's post, I can't help but wonder if my dearest is not getting the short end of the stick, and it isn't I who should be trying for a green card instead of her (do they have green cards in Brazil? I should inquire)

I am in for the verdecard

And can someone put in a nutshell what the person said up there? I couldn't read it.