How many of you saw your significant other online before flying across the country to meet in person?

[bombyjuly 13]

We chatted on Facebook for hours a day when we first met. I thought it would be easier to chat on Skype, so we started to do that. He had to get a camera, so it took a day or two. We had a lot of technical difficulties there and one of us would type and the other would speak, so it was rather humorous. He was always a gentleman, which impressed me because most guys and cams = trouble. I flew there 6 months after we first met, and was glad that we used the cam, because I knew so many of his mannerisms before meeting him. We now use Oovoo, and don't have the technical difficulties that we were having on Skype (at least so far). I have FB Messenger on my phone, too, so we chat on that most days when we are away from the computer. We use the cam almost everyday, and I can not imagine not seeing him any less...

[Mithra 1,185]

I wasn't going to fly across the world without seeing and getting to know my soon to be husband so yeah we used a webcam. Not initially but eventually, yes. I didn't put a picture of myself on any website or profile and wasn't going to so I used a webcam and so did he. He feels the same about putting his picture online. We developed trust for one another so I felt comfortable video chatting with him. We knew each other for well over a year before meeting in person. Honestly, I don't understand what the big deal is. Sharing photos on a social networking site or using a webcam does the same job of getting to know what the other person looks like. It just depends on what people are comfortable with and what works for them.

[bombyjuly 13]

lol,when we met,the first day we saw each other by camera,because we wanted to know if we were the real person we were talking about lol,we were very closer friends for many months,we spoke all the days,and when we met in person, omg,was wonderful,because we felt as if we had known each other for lifetime,he told me,u are more beautiful in person,and I liked him more in person (L) (L)

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

I knew some dudes in Egypt who had a little scam going. One of them is very, very handsome, plays professional football, but is certainly no brain surgeon and also doesn't speak any English ("hi how r u" would be about the extent of his vocabulary.) His friend (the brains of the operation) speaks and writes excellent English, but is not handsome - he is in fact obese. They would set Mazen the football player in front of the webcam as bait, and then Ahmed (the fluent one) would conduct the conversations from behind the scenes, chatting up the American and Canadian ladies they were trying to hook on the line. It worked.

[Mithra 1,185]

It worked in getting someone to come over to Egypt to meet this guy?

ETA - any way you slice it going overseas to meet someone you met online is risky. I would hope most people would do their best to really know what they're getting themselves into before getting on an airplane.

Edited June 26, 2012 by Mithra

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

It worked in getting someone to come over to Egypt to meet this guy?

Apparently so - they both sent me pics of them posing with their ladies.

[Mithra 1,185]

They must've been pretty gullible ladies. Sounds like they didn't go any further than viewing a webcam and typing conversations with these guys. That's way trusting.

[--- 42]

My story is a lot like @happytobe's. I decided to take the move from text chat to webcam after about a month. Ahmed was respectful and since I'm a Muslima he said we didn't have to webcam unless I felt comfortable. I was curious about if he was real or just a ghost (lol) so I clicked the video button on skype and it all started off from there and then afterwards we webcammed everyday for like 6-7 months until I made the 1st visit!

I am really glad that I took that step because sometimes you can really misunderstand the tone of text chat {atleast I can.. sometimes I make jokes or sarcastic comments and expect people to just get it..unfortunately it doesn't work that way!}, and like others have said, I was able to get a feel for his mannerisms, expressions, etc. I didn't want to just go all the way to Morocco for somebody I didn't feel comfortable with or felt like I hardly knew.

It worked for me and like I kind of said above it helped me feel more sure and safe in his intentions in me {for example, I could see a glimpse of what his home-life is like, how he responded to certain questions, his reactions to things, etc} we also did fun things like sit in different places in our homes or outdoors, we gave tours to each other of our house, and he watches me cook and occasionally will make dinner when I eat dinner so we can pretend that there isn't an ocean between us and it's just normal dinner time!

It also helped when we introduced family members to each other so that they could see us together and that we could begin to build a relationship with them too. Also we felt that it would ease their worries. I don't think either of our parents would be so accepting to our relationship if they hadn't seen the way we act and communicate with each other. We are still really young so I feel like our family would disapprove if they couldn't put a face, personality, and voice to this strange new person their child found love within. It's so easy to reject something/somebody you don't know, especially when they are so far away and you met them online. Which is why I felt like webcamming gave me, & my family, a better insight into how Ahmed acts/reacts/etc. Of course, being physically together was eons better but I feel like webcamming for me was an integral part of our courtship {I sound quite Victorian here saying courtship, don't I? LOL} because if we never webcammed I probably wouldn't have felt comfortable going all that way regardless of my feelings for him. Like I said, made me feel more secure and sure, not only of him but of his surroundings, family, so on and so forth.

but most of all my favorite part about webcamming is that I got to see his smile everyday and that's something I couldn't do without for even a day!

Sorry that was so long lol

Edited June 26, 2012 by Margaret n Ahmed

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

They must've been pretty gullible ladies. Sounds like they didn't go any further than viewing a webcam and typing conversations with these guys. That's way trusting.

I think what happened was - Mazen was the bait that got ladies initially willing to sit and chat. Afterwards, after several sessions chatting, friendships were established, and Ahmed would own up to the truth. Ahmed has a very charming personality and is quite witty - but I guess he felt the ladies weren't giving him a chance to get to know him. So he devised this scheme to get his foot in the door, so to speak.

I agree - the ladies were gullible as well.

[Mithra 1,185]

Ok I would be pissed if someone deceived me like that even if I did establish a friendship with them. I certainly wouldn't fly over to meet someone who did that to me.

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

Ok I would be pissed if someone deceived me like that even if I did establish a friendship with them. I certainly wouldn't fly over to meet someone who did that to me.

You have much higher standards of conduct than many

[Sarah B 26]

Ok I would be pissed if someone deceived me like that even if I did establish a friendship with them. I certainly wouldn't fly over to meet someone who did that to me.

yes, exactly. Why would you want to have any kind of relationship with someone who isn't honest upfront?

[Crossed_fingers 128]

Wasn't there someone on here years ago who discovered the person she had been chatting wasn't the person who met her at the airport, but married him anyway? I can't remember if that was in MENA or Sub-Saharan Africa, but I think I recall stumbling on that in the archives once.

[del-2-5-2014 1,339]

My husband still doesn't know what a webcam does.

Highly unlikely, though not improbable, that a Nigerian Male of marrying age does not know what a web cam does.

That one pass me Madam.

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

Wasn't there someone on here years ago who discovered the person she had been chatting wasn't the person who met her at the airport, but married him anyway? I can't remember if that was in MENA or Sub-Saharan Africa, but I think I recall stumbling on that in the archives once.

or when they met in person realised her "husband" did not speak english at all and that she had been talking to his english speaking friends...sigh

I knew some dudes in Egypt who had a little scam going. One of them is very, very handsome, plays professional football, but is certainly no brain surgeon and also doesn't speak any English ("hi how r u" would be about the extent of his vocabulary.) His friend (the brains of the operation) speaks and writes excellent English, but is not handsome - he is in fact obese. They would set Mazen the football player in front of the webcam as bait, and then Ahmed (the fluent one) would conduct the conversations from behind the scenes, chatting up the American and Canadian ladies they were trying to hook on the line. It worked.

who did it work with ... please spill