received her green card and moved out

[Karee 4,191]

This seems to be a recurring story line, the USC signs the I-864, the immigrant gets the conditional GC and leaves. The USC is angry and wants her deported which is not terribly likely to happen. Everyone says tough luck, now you are on the hook for ten years. But hold on a minute. Unless she has the ammo for a VAWA, the I-864 can effectively be terminated with her going out of status and it doesn't matter for you if she stays on illegally, avoiding ICE. She cannot very well be getting 'means tested federal government benefits' when she is out of status can she? So it seems to me that it now becomes critically important for the USC to make certain she cannot get ROC on her own. Make sure that USCIS has every bit of information that you can provide to help them deny her that 10 year GC! Don't worry about whether ICE catches her and sends her back. The really important thing for you is not getting financially hammered by the I-864. Am I right here or am I missing something?

I'm pretty sure once she gets the conditional green card, that's it. The I-864 is in effect and can not be withdrawn.

Edited June 20, 2012 by Karee

[DaveE 178]

I'm pretty sure once she gets the conditional green card, that's it. The I-864 is in effect and can not be withdrawn.

True, and she can adjust status on her own. On line 2b on the Form 751, she just checks the block that says she entered the marriage in good faith, and it was terminated by divorce or annulment, (should she choose to get a divorce). Most likely scenario is that she stays and works under the table (no taxes). In that case the sponsor is still financially liable.

As far as the US government is concerned, the sponsor brought her here, and is responsible for her until she leaves the country, (and they will not try hard to find her and deport her if it comes to that).

[naplesguy 25]

i wish you dudes would stop saying "MOVE ON", its tiresome. theres nowhere to move on to. i had all my eggs in her basket. theres noone left. there all fn dead.

Yea, its easy to conclude with the tired trite "move on." Sometimes it is a matter of laying flat on your back, unable to move and crying out to God and then he will pick you up and carry you for a bit.

I hate to hear stories like this one. If I wanted that kind of treatment, I would just stick with American women like my x wife. One think you can be thankful that its a short term marriage and no kids.

People can be so nasty and deceptive, it's a shame.

[naplesguy 25]

True, and she can adjust status on her own. On line 2b on the Form 751, she just checks the block that says she entered the marriage in good faith, and it was terminated by divorce or annulment, (should she choose to get a divorce). Most likely scenario is that she stays and works under the table (no taxes). In that case the sponsor is still financially liable.

As far as the US government is concerned, the sponsor brought her here, and is responsible for her until she leaves the country, (and they will not try hard to find her and deport her if it comes to that).

A quick read of the sponser liabilty infor leads me to believe the duty of suport is not self-executing and the immigarnt would have to sue the sponser for support. Hence, is she is working under the table it would make it is unlikely she would sue for support.

[eric n tessa 1]

Pretty tough if you don't live there. They can tell you anything they want. In my case the first girl didn't want to be pregnant, but ended up pregnant. Technically abortion is illegal in Thailand, but readily available at certain hospitals. She went there and had an abortion. While I waited for her at the restaraunt downstairs, I took a look at her phone. There were all these messages from some westerner about what a good time they had in Phuket. Of course she said those messages were for her friend, not her. I could go on and on.

A year or two later I ended up at a police station in northern Bangkok with a minor stab wound from her sister. The cops were laughing about that whole thing and drinking my scotch. I called the embassy over and over with no response. I was eventually force to sign a confession in Thai by the police. No idea what it said.

That time of my life I was making ~100k USD a year in BKK. When I met my wife, I was making much less and eventually was not working at all. My wife supported me on about $150-$175 a month working in haircut shop. In the end, I was lucky. I was able to live with my wife and see that she was not in it for the cash. Her friends kept telling her to get rid of that poor foreigner. She stuck by me in Bangkok.

This all happened 2004-2007. My wife has been here in Texas for 3+ years. She drives. She has a job. I've been back on the job with the largest telecom company in the U.S. for 4+ years.

Sorry to ramble, but if you meet a hot hooker in Bangkok, and think she's the one and you can change her, you're wasting your time. If you meet a hot hooker in Bangkok, short time her, pay her and forget about her. She will not change.

thanks for sharing, hope others learn from our mistakes!

[Caryh 5,206]

This seems to be a recurring story line, the USC signs the I-864, the immigrant gets the conditional GC and leaves. The USC is angry and wants her deported which is not terribly likely to happen. Everyone says tough luck, now you are on the hook for ten years. But hold on a minute. Unless she has the ammo for a VAWA, the I-864 can effectively be terminated with her going out of status and it doesn't matter for you if she stays on illegally, avoiding ICE. She cannot very well be getting 'means tested federal government benefits' when she is out of status can she? So it seems to me that it now becomes critically important for the USC to make certain she cannot get ROC on her own. Make sure that USCIS has every bit of information that you can provide to help them deny her that 10 year GC! Don't worry about whether ICE catches her and sends her back. The really important thing for you is not getting financially hammered by the I-864. Am I right here or am I missing something?

She's required to ROC right after the divorce, there is no waiting on the 2 year conditional green card after a divorce. She doesn't need VAWA, she just has to show the marriage was entered into in good faith. Leaving right after getting the green card does not prove she did not marry in good faith, but it might raise the bar on what they'll ask of her. VAWA makes it easier to ROC, but she'll need some sort of evidence. She's here, she's got the green card, the sponsor is on the hook for mean tested benefits. If he has real evidence it was a fraudulent marriage, then turn it in and let go of it. Remember, leaving after getting the green card is not proof. No reason to drive yourself crazy over things you cannot control.

[Operator 1,927]

Pretty tough if you don't live there. They can tell you anything they want. In my case the first girl didn't want to be pregnant, but ended up pregnant. Technically abortion is illegal in Thailand, but readily available at certain hospitals. She went there and had an abortion. While I waited for her at the restaraunt downstairs, I took a look at her phone. There were all these messages from some westerner about what a good time they had in Phuket. Of course she said those messages were for her friend, not her. I could go on and on.

A year or two later I ended up at a police station in northern Bangkok with a minor stab wound from her sister. The cops were laughing about that whole thing and drinking my scotch. I called the embassy over and over with no response. I was eventually force to sign a confession in Thai by the police. No idea what it said.

That time of my life I was making ~100k USD a year in BKK. When I met my wife, I was making much less and eventually was not working at all. My wife supported me on about $150-$175 a month working in haircut shop. In the end, I was lucky. I was able to live with my wife and see that she was not in it for the cash. Her friends kept telling her to get rid of that poor foreigner. She stuck by me in Bangkok.

This all happened 2004-2007. My wife has been here in Texas for 3+ years. She drives. She has a job. I've been back on the job with the largest telecom company in the U.S. for 4+ years.

Sorry to ramble, but if you meet a hot hooker in Bangkok, and think she's the one and you can change her, you're wasting your time. If you meet a hot hooker in Bangkok, short time her, pay her and forget about her. She will not change.

Stabbed by your ol' lady's sister in Bangkok...cops drinking my scotch...this is my kind of story.

[rchilde 0]

so sorry to hear about this. my heart goes out to you!

[unlockingsky 94]

Yeah, it's tiresome, but there's really no other choice in this situation.

agreed, unless you want to take a vengeful road. i rather spent my time on something meaningful.

[james&olya 1,121]

leaving after getting the green card is not proof. No reason to drive yourself crazy over things you cannot control.

But no reason either to not try your best to limit your financial exposure. If she is denied the 10 year GC and goes out of status she will not

a. be in a position to sue you for support or

b. draw 'means tested government benefits'!

So it seems to me you want to do everything you can to give USCIS the information they can use to deny her. It is their decision but you may have critical information that will help swing that decision towards denial and thus end that I-864 hanging over your head. If she stays on as an illegal after that she is not in a position to cause you financial loss beyond what you have already spent.

Edited June 20, 2012 by james&olya

[rade2rising 205]

In Thailand they are bargirls. They don't become strippers until they move to the U.S.

Stickman has lots of stories on his website. He knows the deal. I personally never had to hire him since I lived there. I figured it out with the first girl on my own. I give thanks every day that I never tried to petition for her.

http://www.stickmanweekly.com/ThailandBargirlInvestigations.html

wow i shouldn't have clicked that link

been reading those stories for past 2hrs. some are just hilarious and some pretty sad.

I am interested in taking a trip to thailand now myself

[Caryh 5,206]

But no reason either to not try your best to limit your financial exposure. If she is denied the 10 year GC and goes out of status she will not

a. be in a position to sue you for support or

b. draw 'means tested government benefits'!

So it seems to me you want to do everything you can to give USCIS the information they can use to deny her. It is their decision but you may have critical information that will help swing that decision towards denial and thus end that I-864 hanging over your head. If she stays on as an illegal after that she is not in a position to cause you financial loss beyond what you have already spent.

Ah but I did say "If he has real evidence it was a fraudulent marriage, then turn it in and let go of it." Few have any real evidence that fraud was committed, they just say she left so it must be fraud and want to go on an on about it. If thats all they have, then fine write a letter to USCIS stating she left the day she got the green card. Letting go lets you go on with your life instead of living in the past trying to change something you're not in control of. Anyone trying to ROC after a divorce that was began as soon as the green card arrived is going to have a hard time proving it was a legit marriage. But the sponsor can't really do a thing about that. They're not even allowed to know if the ROC has been filed for. Why make yourself crazy over it? Turn in what you have and let go.

[Lisa and Ian 7]

It's not the immigrant, by the way, that can sue; it is the government. See "How is this Form Used" here. http://www.uscis.gov...i-864instr.pdf. Does she have a job currently, or do you know what her plans are? Did she put anything in writing?

If I were in this situation, I would make an infopass appointment and see if anything can be done.

I am sorry this happened.

Edited June 20, 2012 by Lisa and Ian

[Karee 4,191]

wow i shouldn't have clicked that link

been reading those stories for past 2hrs. some are just hilarious and some pretty sad.

I am interested in taking a trip to thailand now myself

Once you understand how things work, it's a great place. It's fine to take a girl from the bar, but leave it at that. Don't make the mistake alot of people make and think you can change them, cause you can't.

[rade2rising 205]

yea from those stories it seems the moms are very money crazy there too and control their daughters alot.

The girls them just want the money but I think the guys them are to be blamed too, they get delusions of grandeur and start filing petitions for girls who don't care about them just their money.

For OP sake if it was a bar girl well its very sad and nothing can be done that will make you feel better right away.