unhappy while am here

[Peter_Pan 661]

Or, you know, you could open a bank account and people on here could really help you.

[JohnR! 5,495]

1339515092[/url]' post='5441336']

Or, you know, you could open a bank account and people on here could really help you.

Great idea, but she won't have to do that.

Most shelters are funded by NGOs and if you want to help you can give to any of these. Just pick one that you consider kosher and make your donation.

[Sandra G. 5,048]

You should leave right now. First of all file a police report, if you fear for your life get a restraining order against him, go to a shelter for victims of domestic violence, get divorced and then decide what you want to do in your life, if you want to go back to your home Country ask in the divorce papers for your husband to pay for the costs of all travel expenses. I know many cases the Judges ordered the husbands to pay for the travel expenses. Do not stay in the same house at all!LEAVE TODAY! you can find a shelter for victim of domestic violence (1−800−799.7233).

Edited June 12, 2012 by sandranj

[Leatherneck 693]

i arrived here sept 29, 2011 with my 13 year old daughter i experience a lot of abuse physically, mentally, and sexually. I cant believe this would happen to me here coz i thought my husband truly love me but i found out that he didnt love me, and he just need me just for sex. Our age gap is 18 years but i didnt think that he is older so much than me coz of the years we been together. So sad, im going to give up and wants to go back in the philippines even its hard to get the greencard to come here. I dont care about the green card or US citizen if am not happy here. I think im gonna die or will become crazy here living with him. A lot of friends telling me not to leave USA and need to sacrifice or understand my husband until i become a US citizen, For me, what is the the VISA FOR? if your unhappy. I ask him a favor just find us money for our airfare back to philippines then i will not bother him anymore, but he said if we want to go back to PH then we need to find money for ourselves, it means he will not help us for our plane ticket. sounds like he wants us to suffer here in america. I have so much regret of coming here. But ill try to find money to go back to my country, i dont let him step down on me by many many years.. one year is enough. So right now i am struggling to work a 3 part time job until i could finally save for my airfare. if i be in the Philippines, i want to forget all those bad memories from here, i will just put on my mind it just a dream.

You can not count on the abuser to help the victim, this you must do. Anyone telling you to stay in an abusive relationship does not have value your best interest and they need their head examined. Do not tolerate the abuse, you must first protect you, then your child, get out now, file a police report about the past abuse and head to a shelter. America has not abused you -- your husband has, you can make a life here without him.

Edited June 12, 2012 by Leatherneck

[JennyLee 0]

Your story breaks my heart. I'm so sorry your stay in USA is so sad...you are so brave too. I really agree besides contacting shelters or finding some place to stay till you can leave, the embassy would be a great place to contact for help. And making a police report and contacting USCIS is of course the right way to go too. I just hope whatever you do you and your daughter are safe. Nobody deserves to be abused in any way and it's not your fault. He has the problem. God bless you both.

[LSnBigBear 61]

Listen I am the petitioner for my fiancee. You need to contact the police the next time he touches you inappropiately. Then let them help you as in the United States there is ZERO tolerance for physical abuse. I mean even if he grabs your arm and leaves a mark or bruise, call the police. Do not allow him to work up to worse or fatal abuse. You have your daughter to think about.. The great thing about our country is you will not be left alone. As others posted, there are shelters along with what sounds like numerous friends on VJ reaching out if you need assistance. Under no uncertain terms should anyone be abused. I lived in your country and this is totally different then how your country handles abuse. You ARE PROTECTED and he will spend time in jail. Do not allow him to continue and have NO heart or bad feelings about him going to jail.. If he is as bad as you say then he deserves to be in a cage.... Good Luck

[JaMeMa 2]

Dear sis...everything will be ok thru our God almighty. It is written; ask n' it shall be given, knock n' the door will be opened n' seek n' you'll find. They are all God's promises to us and please claim them all. As mother, my heart is filled with anger to read your post. It shall be ok with you n' your doutas souls. Follow all the guidence that you are given by the VJers. Your safety is more important and worthy than your abusive husband.

All the best and pray w/t season.

God bless and please keep us posted with your progress.

My heart goes for both of you. And Im praying for you.

[eric n tessa 1]

You should leave right now. First of all file a police report, if you fear for your life get a restraining order against him, go to a shelter for victims of domestic violence, get divorced and then decide what you want to do in your life, if you want to go back to your home Country ask in the divorce papers for your husband to pay for the costs of all travel expenses. I know many cases the Judges ordered the husbands to pay for the travel expenses. Do not stay in the same house at all!LEAVE TODAY! you can find a shelter for victim of domestic violence (1−800−799.7233).

Good advise! Leave now!

[eric n tessa 1]

Leave NOW, call a shelter and get you and your daughter OUT and away from that man! Abuse is not ok! call the police and report the abuse and if you have to get a restraining order so he can not come near you. call the embassy and USCIS and report that man he does belong in jail and you deserve to be safe. i am pretty sure the USCIS has a program for abuse spouses and can help you get a green card to stay in the country if you wish. but cannt blame you for wanting to leave. Not all men here are like him. God bless and take care! and GET OUT NOW!

[hamigirl710 112]

I really hope that you will take the steps to make sure you and your daughter are safe. I am a domestic violence advocate in my state and I can reassure you that if you contact the domestic violence hotline they will put you in contact with somebody close to where you live and assist you in leaving and being safe. The advocate you talk to will be able to assist you with obtaining temporary shelter and legal advise and maybe even funds to help you go home if that is what you want to do. Or my other advise is if he is hurting you and refuses to let you leave then call 911 and tell them that you are being abused and afraid for your life and the officer will come to you and take you to safety. Please stay safe and God speed!!

Edited June 12, 2012 by hamigirl710

[baby44 0]

i arrived here sept 29, 2011 with my 13 year old daughter i experience a lot of abuse physically, mentally, and sexually. I cant believe this would happen to me here coz i thought my husband truly love me but i found out that he didnt love me, and he just need me just for sex. Our age gap is 18 years but i didnt think that he is older so much than me coz of the years we been together. So sad, im going to give up and wants to go back in the philippines even its hard to get the greencard to come here. I dont care about the green card or US citizen if am not happy here. I think im gonna die or will become crazy here living with him. A lot of friends telling me not to leave USA and need to sacrifice or understand my husband until i become a US citizen, For me, what is the the VISA FOR? if your unhappy. I ask him a favor just find us money for our airfare back to philippines then i will not bother him anymore, but he said if we want to go back to PH then we need to find money for ourselves, it means he will not help us for our plane ticket. sounds like he wants us to suffer here in america. I have so much regret of coming here. But ill try to find money to go back to my country, i dont let him step down on me by many many years.. one year is enough. So right now i am struggling to work a 3 part time job until i could finally save for my airfare. if i be in the Philippines, i want to forget all those bad memories from here, i will just put on my mind it just a dream.

Sorry to hear about your story. If you can find a Filipino community in your area, maybe a Church who could help you a place to stay to keep you safe and your daughter. Keep all the abuse evidence you will need that if you decide later to stay in the US.

[Fahari 0]

OMG!These post have just broke my heart.Am so sorry for what your going through its so sad and painful.I know how difficult the process is.And the happiness when one gets approved hoping for a better and happy life.Then when you arrive you find it opposite.How sad.You will be in my prayers i know that God will see you through.

[neodragon0l 6]

I am sorry to hear your story. I know it is tough, but there are help around you more than you know. You don't need to wait for him. You are not alone! Depending where you live, there are Filipino based nonprofits that can help you. I am from California and more familiar with the nonprofits here. You can apply for a U-Visa if you are extremely domestic violence. I don't know what the paperwork entails. Public Counsel Law Center (http://www.publiccounsel.org) can help with the entire filing. Their service is free.

Edited June 12, 2012 by neodragon0l

[steffbry 5]

There are Filipino Communities in your Area, you can seek help from them. Or like Majority of the people say here, look for a shelter and bring your Daughter with you. Living in your own Home with that Man is not a good place to be with. I really feel bad around these cases esp. for Women being abused. It's really hard if you're still questioning if you're with the right Man. I hope there'll be no more of this abuses on Women and just making them sex slaves. Women are taken good care of, not being played around.

[Kelly C 16]

Thoughts and Prayers go out to you and your daughter.

The USA is a great place with mostly good people and opportunities. There are azzholes everywhere including here in the US. It is sad that these kinds of people manipulate other people to get what they want.

I wish you well, good luck.

Kelly