People make up your mind before bringing someone here!!

[khwaidee1 196]

I agree with many of the sentiments here. But, being new here, one thing really jumps out at me and that is financial aspect so many posters talk about. As most of you know, it is expensive to live in the US and money is the number 1 reason for divorce. Regardless of where your fiance may be coming from, I believe you should be able to provide for your mate and it seems hard to believe that that it could be done on 125% of the poverty guidelines, that's like $1600 a month to live on for two people, rent, food, transportation, etc. I understand that love will conquer many things, but, as I heard someone say once "You can't eat love."

[baron555 934]

Why is it that everytime I turn around I see someone bringing a person over to the states on a K1 visa and then decide not to get married. Although I am a US Citizen I hate the fact that this is happening. People you need to make up your mind before making this commitment and spending all this money. Must be nice to have money to play with. Even more playing with peoples emotions and dreams. I am well aware that everyone does not come over in all honesty, but those that do and left to believe they are loved by the person who petitions for them to only be left in a bad situation. I feel sorry for those that come here have no family or friends only to be told I DONT WANT TO GET MARRIED ANYMORE so I guess you will have to go back. Why could you not figure that out before going that far!! Some people come from really bad living situations and really dont want to go back. There was enough love to start the situation! Geesh I just dont know what to say. Just to clarify I am married to a wonderful man from another country. We have been married for more than a year. I am glad I did not file for him till 7 months later because it made me even more sure to want to be with him and to be with him more in his environment.

Maybe you need to keep different company? All of the K-1s that we know of are very happy together and still together.

[Brownie07 7]

I think that one of the great mistakes that people make is lack of time. I've seen time and time again that people rush into marriage (international and other wise) and don't take the time to know their potential mate.

I believe that some people can fall in love quickly but that isn't the case of most. The other mistake is unrealistic expectation -- "she's going to be a great house wife", "he's going to be an outstanding provider". We have to be realistic about our expectations as well.

Marriage is more than a wedding, it takes work and so many don't understand that until its too late.

[Ning 619]

I think that one of the great mistakes that people make is lack of time. I've seen time and time again that people rush into marriage (international and other wise) and don't take the time to know their potential mate.

I believe that some people can fall in love quickly but that isn't the case of most. The other mistake is unrealistic expectation -- "she's going to be a great house wife", "he's going to be an outstanding provider". We have to be realistic about our expectations as well.

Marriage is more than a wedding, it takes work and so many don't understand that until its too late.

I think you are right but what do you suggest we do about the problem? Are we going to become Dr Phil to the worlds population? How do we limit the expectations of others that we dont even know? I think the expectation that we can influence the thinking of another person is unrealistic.

It incredible to me that people will use a public forum to ask for advise about such a serious situation. Its also incredible to think they would follow such advise. Really they are just venting and stabbing in the dark rather than forcing themselves to accept reality and deal with the problem they created.

babygurl think everyone that enters the USA on a K1 should marry and figure out who they married later because its cheaper for example. She waited a full 7 months to file. That must be the benchmark for success.

I suppose thats why V J provides quality advise about immigration matters and wasnt designed to take care of the worlds marital woes.