Abusive Immigrant Husband

[mona81 1]

Okay, so here is a short description of the issue, and I will follow it up with what I have already done... and then you guys can hopefully tell me what else I need to do.

My husband is from Morocco. Getting him here was really easy. Once he was here he started drinking and when drunk physically abusive. He says he doesn't remember being abusive and agreed to stop drinking. Every time we come close to an immigration process he straightens up and becomes a wonderful husband. But right after starts drinking again and becomes abusive. We just had the most beautiful baby girl in November and he has physically assaulted me several times since.

In February of this year we both signed the i751 petition to lift conditions. That day he got drunk and assaulted me while holding my daughter. He has been verbally, and emotionally abusive every since. He is now out of the house... so please do not worry.

Here is what I have done:

* Filed a Domestic Violence Protection order. He has been removed from the home and is to have no contact with me or my children (this includes the baby we just had)

* I wrote a letter to USCIS requesting my name be removed from the petition, his visa and as his sponsor, and attached a copy of the DVPO to the letter.

* I filed an application with the Passport Issuance Alert Program for children so he can not get her a passport and attached a copy of the DVPO to that with wording "law enforcement shall use any and all means necessary to keep said child in the United States".

* Have secured an Attorney and just filed for a Dissolution of Marriage which requests him to get 52 weeks of DV treatment, 35 weeks of drug and alcohol treatment and parenting classes. Once finished he would get 2 hrs once a week supervised visits. He also will have to pay child support and 1/2 of daycare.

So that is the back ground, and what I have done. Here is my question. WHAT ELSE do I need to do? He has had his biometrics appointment, but does not have his 10 year card yet nor has he had an interview. His behavior in the weeks leading up to the protection order was bizarre and he was planning a vacation back to Morocco in June/July. I have no idea if he is planning on coming back or not.

So, what else should I do? What would happen to him immigration wise based on what he has done to me and my children?

Thanks for QUICK responses. *Please know that I love my husband and tried for 3 years to make it work. I begged him to get help and he had every opportunity to change and he chose to throw us away as I warned him I would do this for over a year.

Thanks

Mona

[Bacon and Cabbage 0]

Oh my, I'm so sorry to hear what youou have gone through. That sounds like such a heart breaking ordeal for you and your family.

I think you have done quite a bit in order to protect your family from him. May I ask if he had an alcohol problem before he left Morocco? Did he even drink prior to entering the states? It sounds to me that the complete change of scenery has perhaps messed with his head and he must be struggling.

As for what else you could do, well it depends on how far you want to go. If you want no more contact with him then I would advise completely moving everything to a different location leaving no record of where you are moving to. That is if you want all ties cut.

Good luck and best wishes

[mona81 1]

Oh my, I'm so sorry to hear what youou have gone through. That sounds like such a heart breaking ordeal for you and your family.

I think you have done quite a bit in order to protect your family from him. May I ask if he had an alcohol problem before he left Morocco? Did he even drink prior to entering the states? It sounds to me that the complete change of scenery has perhaps messed with his head and he must be struggling.

As for what else you could do, well it depends on how far you want to go. If you want no more contact with him then I would advise completely moving everything to a different location leaving no record of where you are moving to. That is if you want all ties cut.

Good luck and best wishes

You know I am not sure. I know I saw him drink one time in the 2 years we talked on line and that was because he was at a wedding. But he told me he didnt drunk very often. Now he says he came to the cyber cafe drunk every day. So I honestly do not know what to believe from him. I am going to be petitioning the court to allow me to move but because we are married and have a child, for the time being I still have to stay in the home until the divorce is complete... then hopefully I will be allowed to leave.

[sulhaq 60]

I am very sorry to hear this happened to you and my best wishes are with you.

My only suggestion to you is to dissolve the marriage as soon as possible (if indeed you have come to the conclusion that this marriage cannot be saved), and then inform USCIS that you are withdrawing the I-751 petition that you filed together with your husband on the basis that you are now divorced.

Since your husband has a 2-year green card, I believe he will not become immediately deport-able, and can file for ROC separately on his own on the basis that he entered into marriage with good faith intentions, although, I don't see him getting very far with that, what with all the domestic violence that resulted in divorce.

Good luck.

[WrightFamily 34]

Sorry your marriage took this turn, but I wish you would have filed criminal charges against him, his 2year green card would be toast! You have done very well in your divorce perpetration!!

Edited April 23, 2012 by WrightFamily

[FinallyDone:) 10]

I am so sorry for all this. i hope your life gets back on track. from what you said i am glad that u have pretty much blocked him from your life

[tany1157 161]

I'm so sorry to hear this, and BRAVO for leaving!! That takes a great amount of strength and self worth. That was probably the best decision you could have made for yourself and your kids. I pray for your healing, and hope you never look back.

[Ryan H 3,821]

Moved from IR-1/CR-1 Process & Procedures to Effects of Major Family Changes on Immigration Benefits forum.

[R and F 34]

Call me crazy but I have seen this post previously on VJ. Right when she said that he hit her with her child in her arms I knew I had read it somewhere else.

[mona81 1]

Call me crazy but I have seen this post previously on VJ. Right when she said that he hit her with her child in her arms I knew I had read it somewhere else.

never posted about this before. i posted back in 2007-2008 under a different name when we were going through the process of getting him here. But this topic was just started today. only talked about it on my facebook page with my friends last week. so unless you know one of my friends and they are blabbing... then you have not heard this from me before.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Call me crazy but I have seen this post previously on VJ. Right when she said that he hit her with her child in her arms I knew I had read it somewhere else.

As you wish... you're crazy. The post you're talking about from my recollection involved an immigrant female allegedly being abused by her USC spouse (I found the post I believe you're referring to and it confirms these stories are NOTHING alike but in the interest of not derailing this thread I will not post it). Totally different post/person/circumstances. You will often see similar stories but it's best not to bring it up unless you re-read the post you think it is like and the stories are identical (which has happened before).. otherwise you run the risk of minimising the OP's pain which is never good but also derailing the thread.

Edited April 23, 2012 by Vanessa&Tony

[VanessaTony 3,567]

never posted about this before. i posted back in 2007-2008 under a different name when we were going through the process of getting him here. But this topic was just started today. only talked about it on my facebook page with my friends last week. so unless you know one of my friends and they are blabbing... then you have not heard this from me before.

No it wasn't you I'm sorry you're going through this. I just wanted to tell you I think you're doing a wonderful job of being proactive to protect you and your child.

My only suggestion regarding immigration is to make an Infopass appointment to confirm in person that you are withdrawing your support of the joint petition. Take another signed statement and another copy of the protective order. You want to be sure you've been removed from it. He should have contacted them to update his address once he moved out. It's also important if you've charged him with assault (if you haven't you should consider it) that you contact the police to let them know that they should advice ICE that a conditional immigrant is being detained on domestic violence charges. They should put him on immigration hold and he will face possible deportation.

[unlockingsky 94]

the only downside to this that if he leaves the state and never return, you won't get your child support money anymore. congrats on standing up for yourself!

[Ayman___ 92]

I'm so sorry to hear about this but you are strong you made the steps to get him out of your life.No one deserves to be abused and the children don't need to see this.Are you pressing charges on him for DV?I hope so and go through with it.Been there and this is the only way I found peace of mind in my life.wish you the best and we will be praying for you May GOD keep you and your children safe always

Edited April 23, 2012 by AYMAN_RINA

[Chicagoguy 2 27]

It is my guess that your husband has become an alcoholic. It happens. But people can improve IF they are willing to change.

This is the most difficult part and usually involves treatment and usually joining and attending Alcoholics Anonymous.

Not sure if you can wait for this transformation. It might be a very bumpy road and it might never happen.

Maybe you could try an Alanon meeting just to talk with others who might help you.