Australian sponsor refuses to marry Fiancee - question

[Lexy 2]

Hi, I know this girl who is an Australian and has sponsored her fiance and his son from Europe to Australia on a promise to marry him. He is from Europe and arrived in Australia mid March 2012.He is in Australia on a Fiance visa. He left his home country, sold everything - house, car, left his good job to move to Australia and marry this woman. The Australian sponsor and he have plans to marry in 7 days.

3 days ago they had an argument about smoking and she left the house they currently live in together, and disappeared for 48 hours. She came back home saying she was at work during this missing time.

She does not want to marry him more. Is the anything he can do about this dilemma he is in? Can he sue her for the pain and suffering? The Australian gov. will probably kick him out of the country in 9 months if they are not married by due date. He is in mid 40's has a son, so is she. To move back to his own country will be difficult for him and his child who should be attending school by now. The child cannot attend school until they marry, as he currently has no rights in Australia.

Any advice is appreciated.

Thanks.

L.

[Deb+Steve 13]

The Australian Govt. won't kick him out after 9 months, he will have to leave when the time is up because that's what they agreed to when they applied for that visa subclass.

It's sad but I'm sure this happens more than we realise. I feel for his son. I doubt they're not getting married over smoking ... I'm sure there's more to the story but bottom line, thank goodness Australia is not litigious. He can't sue because no one forced him to sell all his belongings and move half way around the world with a child. Best of luck to both of them and maybe they will work it out.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Agree with Deb. No he can't sue. He is able to TRY of course but it's unlikely to get anywhere and he'll just have wasted the money. He MIGHT be able to sue her to pay him back the money he wasted on a wedding but again that's a long shot and he'd more than likely have to prove that she deliberately waited until he'd spent the money and it was non-refundable, show malice instead of a simple breakdown of relationship.

Just like in the US he won't be kicked out immediately. I suggest he contacts the his embassy and asks for their assistance, or from family and friends.

On the financial front I'm would hope he hasn't spent ALL the money he got from selling his house and other possessions so he should be able to get back on track relatively easily. He's only been gone from the UK for about a month. He could call his work and see if his position is still available. It sucks but if she doesn't want to marry him he can't force her to.

I also agree that I doubt this is about smoking alone, there's something else as well. I'm sorry for your friend

[Lexy 2]

Thank you so much for your reply. I had a feeling that would be the case but you two reinforced it. He has not spent all of his money, but is in a lot of hurt over this woman's actions.

Some of my friends think she may have someone on the side, as the fiance has checked her emails and found a few emails from another guy, and he confronted her about it. Both of you are right the smoking issue was just that smoke to hide the real issue.

Here is the thing, she was the one chasing him to marry her.

She just kicked him out of the house, he is now living with friends. I cannot believe this is happening to him... I know this woman, and I am shocked she would treat her finance this way.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

She just kicked him out of the house, he is now living with friends. I cannot believe this is happening to him... I know this woman, and I am shocked she would treat her finance this way.

You know in reality this could be a blessing in disguise. Imagine the drama if she waited until after the wedding to show her true colours. Imagine the drama of going through the divorce, and he probably WOULD have spent much of the money by then. While it's truly sucky this happened it could have been so much worse - and he and his child deserve better than this. It's also probably good that she didn't have enough time to fully imprint herself in the child's life as a mother, ugh.

He will be okay. He will survive and he'll be better for it. And I guarantee that most of her friends who know both him and her feel as you do, so he's not alone or isolated.

[Lexy 2]

You know in reality this could be a blessing in disguise. Imagine the drama if she waited until after the wedding to show her true colours. Imagine the drama of going through the divorce, and he probably WOULD have spent much of the money by then. While it's truly sucky this happened it could have been so much worse - and he and his child deserve better than this. It's also probably good that she didn't have enough time to fully imprint herself in the child's life as a mother, ugh.

He will be okay. He will survive and he'll be better for it. And I guarantee that most of her friends who know both him and her feel as you do, so he's not alone or isolated.

Indeed, it may be a blessing in disguise.

Thank you for your encouragement, I will pass it along and make him feel better.