Any Advice and/or Help Appreciated

[Heather Kamal 0]

Hello everyone. I am new here. I met my Egyptian 5 years ago and we were friends only for the first 3 years. When we finally figured out that we were soulmates I made 2 trips to meet him in the last 2 years. He is currently attending college and would like to finish before we apply for his VISA. There is an age difference but not unlike many there. Anyway we will marry in January of 2013 in Cairo, Egypt at the embassy. We have proof of commitment in Orfi marriage although not recognized as it used to be we will still use it as commitment until his college is completed. My question is...how hard on couples are the consulates there, and how much delay or couples put in admin. is common? Also, when applying for his marriage VISA what paperwork will I need to have, what will both of us have to bring to apply for the VISA and what kind of relationship proof do they want at the time we apply? Or...do they ask you for specific proof at a later time...Thanks in advance

[Ayman___ 92]

welcome to VJ ....Here is a guide if your going to marry i130 Good luck if you have any questions people are always around to answer them.....This site been a blessing to many people http://www.visajourney.com/content/i130guide1

[Heather Kamal 0]

Hello everyone. I am new here. I met my Egyptian 5 years ago and we were friends only for the first 3 years. When we finally figured out that we were soulmates I made 2 trips to meet him in the last 2 years. He is currently attending college and would like to finish before we apply for his VISA. There is an age difference but not unlike many there. Anyway we will marry in January of 2013 in Cairo, Egypt at the embassy. We have proof of commitment in Orfi marriage although not recognized as it used to be we will still use it as commitment until his college is completed. My question is...how hard on couples are the consulates there, and how much delay or couples put in admin. is common? Also, when applying for his marriage VISA what paperwork will I need to have, what will both of us have to bring to apply for the VISA and what kind of relationship proof do they want at the time we apply? Or...do they ask you for specific proof at a later time...Thanks in advance

Thank you so much. I am so nervous but I hear the consulates in Cairo are very nice for the most part.

[NY_BX 397]

Hello everyone. I am new here. I met my Egyptian 5 years ago and we were friends only for the first 3 years. When we finally figured out that we were soulmates I made 2 trips to meet him in the last 2 years. He is currently attending college and would like to finish before we apply for his VISA. There is an age difference but not unlike many there. Anyway we will marry in January of 2013 in Cairo, Egypt at the embassy. We have proof of commitment in Orfi marriage although not recognized as it used to be we will still use it as commitment until his college is completed. My question is...how hard on couples are the consulates there, and how much delay or couples put in admin. is common? Also, when applying for his marriage VISA what paperwork will I need to have, what will both of us have to bring to apply for the VISA and what kind of relationship proof do they want at the time we apply? Or...do they ask you for specific proof at a later time...Thanks in advance

Hi Heather, welcome.

Egypt is a high fraud country so the embassy is rigorous though not like other MENA countries. You must gather every single piece of evidence you have of your relationship. How big is the age difference? AP is a given for virtually almost every male in Egypt, so prepare for that. A marriage visa usually takes 10 months - 1 year, more or less, from filing to entering the US. Since he is in college, that shouldn't be a big issue.

Some of the red flags to overcome are:

Age difference- are you of child bearing age and he is a lot younger? (you don't have to answer, I'm just telling you how CO think) So if you're, let's say, 38 and he is 27 that may not be a big problem. Now, if you're 51 and he is 31, then they may give you a harder time.

Past marriages and children from those marriages (if any)

Religion differences

Have you met his family?

Has ha applied for any visas before?

Has anyone petitioned for him in the past?

How many times will you visit after the marriage?

Maybe other members can add to the list. Remember that consulars are there to scan for possible scammers, so prepare your case as if you're a lawyer and not a spouse.

Good luck!

[Heather Kamal 0]

Thanks for the tips I appreciate them greatly. I am 40 and he is 24. His brother, friends, and some uncles and cousins know we are marrying and they all love me. His mom knows of me as a friend only and his dad knows very little. His father is strict upper Egyptian man and has a very bad relationship with his sons. My husband is the oldest, then his sister, and his brother is the youngest. To avoid being thrown out of the family home while he is in college he has not told his family of the intent to marry or leave Egypt. We both know how important family is there and acceptance is preferred although not required. I know it will not be easy...I have 3 children from a past marriage. My children all love him immensely. My oldest daughter is 16 and will be coming with me to attend our embassy marriage and wedding party. No one has filed for him before. I plan to visit him at least twice after our marriage...more of course if he is put in admin. I am a Christian studying Islam as my husband asked me to make a choice after researching Islam. He said Christian or Muslim does not matter to him because he fell in love with me Christian

Edited April 21, 2012 by Heather Kamal

[nurse1967 287]

You are going to have issues. First of all, the age difference is big. Secondly, when they find out that his immediate family is unaware of the relationship that will certainly be scrutinized. Whether the family is strict or not is not going to matter to the CO. Don't be surprised if they show up on his parent's doorstep. Orfi marriages are seen as suspect as well. Sorry, so far I see only hurdles. And no, the consulate there IS NOT NICE.

Edited April 21, 2012 by Betsy El Sum

[pushbrk 12,910]

Hello everyone. I am new here. I met my Egyptian 5 years ago and we were friends only for the first 3 years. When we finally figured out that we were soulmates I made 2 trips to meet him in the last 2 years. He is currently attending college and would like to finish before we apply for his VISA. There is an age difference but not unlike many there. Anyway we will marry in January of 2013 in Cairo, Egypt at the embassy. We have proof of commitment in Orfi marriage although not recognized as it used to be we will still use it as commitment until his college is completed. My question is...how hard on couples are the consulates there, and how much delay or couples put in admin. is common? Also, when applying for his marriage VISA what paperwork will I need to have, what will both of us have to bring to apply for the VISA and what kind of relationship proof do they want at the time we apply? Or...do they ask you for specific proof at a later time...Thanks in advance

Lots of good answers and discussion already but NO, you WILL NOT be getting married at the US Embassy. Here's a resource you need.

http://egypt.usembas...ular/acs12.html

Also, there will be no K3 visa in your future. The currently viable spouse visa for your situation is the CR1.

Edited April 21, 2012 by pushbrk

[together4evr 360]

Maybe you should try a fiance petition first?

The age is significant because you are almost past child bearing age....Yes I know some women have kids in their 50's But not usually

Not knowing about your intent to marry and immigrate is HUGE. You really need the family support since your age difference is so large. If he really loves a woman and is proud of her then he would show you around to his family and friends.

It is not impossible, but it will be hard.

Good Luck

Edited April 21, 2012 by togetherforever13

[NY_BX 397]

Thanks for the tips I appreciate them greatly. I am 40 and he is 24. His brother, friends, and some uncles and cousins know we are marrying and they all love me. His mom knows of me as a friend only and his dad knows very little. His father is strict upper Egyptian man and has a very bad relationship with his sons. My husband is the oldest, then his sister, and his brother is the youngest. To avoid being thrown out of the family home while he is in college he has not told his family of the intent to marry or leave Egypt. We both know how important family is there and acceptance is preferred although not required. I know it will not be easy...I have 3 children from a past marriage. My children all love him immensely. My oldest daughter is 16 and will be coming with me to attend our embassy marriage and wedding party. No one has filed for him before. I plan to visit him at least twice after our marriage...more of course if he is put in admin. I am a Christian studying Islam as my husband asked me to make a choice after researching Islam. He said Christian or Muslim does not matter to him because he fell in love with me Christian

Ok, so I gotta be honest with you, more than likely you will have an uphill battle. Egypt is not nice- professionals, yes- but not nice. Like I said before, they are there to spot scammers and so far your response hits most of the check marks in their workbook. First your age difference is very big and add to that you have a 16 year old daughter. The CO may think your daughter is more suitable to your fiance than you are and may see that as a disturbing red flag. Second, his family must know about his intent of marriage and immigration, at the very least. Third, he asked you to study Islam. Are you planning to convert? If the CO finds out you converted for him that may also be a red flag. Fourth, and I forgot to mention this, you signed an Orfi marriage. That's a big red flag.

Another thing: are you sending each other money? If you are, do not disclose that. It may be perceived as a business transaction. Are you planning to stay in Egypt for more than 30 days on each visit after you marry? Going for a week is ok, but not ideal.

I'd follow another member's advise and try the K-1 visa first. That way you're covered so if you go through all these hurdles, then you can get married and try the other route. If you marry that's the only route you'll be able to go and if they deny the visa, what's next?

I did the K-1 and I'm really happy we did. Some members may say that it is more expensive and is a hassle to then AOS and get a job. But in the end, it is less time and I don't have a husband overseas waiting to come to me at the mercy of the US government. And, if they would've denied it, then I have a second option which is to marry and file a marriage visa.

Good luck.

[pushbrk 12,910]

I think it's best to marry and have both the commitment of marriage and the opportunity to stay together as man and wife some significant time prior to the visa interview. Trying to take the fiance visa route actually magnifies most of your red flags. The idea is to show a real relationship, not avoid needing a divorce if the visa is ultimately denied. You've got time to do extensive reading and preparation, so do it. Ultimately what path to take is up to you.

I'm not an expert on an Orfi marriage but you'll want to look into whether having one makes you too married for a fiance visa anyway.

[Ryan H 3,812]

Moved from K3 Process & Procedures to MENA regional forum.

[Dr. A ♥ O 203]

Heather I know one couple with the same age difference as you guys that also petitioned from Egypt on the K1. They're still together after all these years too. I think you guys have known each other longer than they did when they went through the process so that's a plus and she also has three nearly adult kids from a prior marriage. I also know several other couples that where married and petitioned from Egypt on a CR-1. They also have the same age difference and the women had 3-4 kids from a prior marriage. One was recently within the last year. Most of the others are from the year before that or over the past five years. I think you'll be fine, especially with the years you've known him.

Others have answered your other questions already and given you links to the guides on how to apply for a visa, and linked you to how to have an official marriage in Egypt.

As for your questions about how hard they are on couples that's a ####### shoot. It depends on what they find. They do their own research and background checks as well, and they test couples resolve in various ways. In most cases if your intentions are good and things remain true it will be alright.

As for administrative processing and administrative review you should expect some of that at all levels of the process. It's very common to have several months of it if not years when petitioning from the MENA region.

Evidence you provide should include snippets of emails going back to the beginning of communication. Evidence of your trips including tickets, photos, hotel reservations. Evidence of your communication with his family including uncles and various friends. Pictures of meeting these people would also be good. Evidence of phone records, skype conversations, IM chats, however you communicate. Evidence of his communication with your children and acting as a father.

I understand the strict father from upper Egypt thing and why he hasn't told the family. The employees at the embassy have an understanding of the culture and the region and will take things into consideration. What it will come down to is who the mother says he can marry. They can go against the father but they can't go against the mother. My husband didn't tell his parents when we married officially but his Mom did say to him and his father that he could marry who he wants. He told his older sister and his Grandma on his mother's side we were getting married. We even stayed at his Grandma's family home in Luxor after getting married and they made us a cake. They are very kind and good people. He had to win some allies in the family first and then the Dad came into acceptance. I know the "secrecy" can be bothersome but things are done differently there because of the societal norms. Our case was a little different though in that they took him during his training years in medical school for his compulsory military training. Our visa process was delayed and after 2.5 years of being apart but staying together I won his whole family over. We'd also known each other several years prior to deciding to get married. By the time we went to our interview we'd reunited and had the religious ceremony at El Nour Mosque with friends from the neighborhood and the entire immediate family and lived together for the summer in Hurghada on the Red Sea while he was practicing medicine at a private clinic that served tourists. After all that the whole secrecy thing in the beginning didn't come up as an issue in the interview for us. I can certainly understand it though. His embassy interview was really smooth and didn't last more than ten minutes. Our AOS interview was also really smooth and didn't last more than 30 minutes.

One thing that may hang you guys up is his military obligation and where he stands with that. If he's completed it you should be fine.

I send my best wishes for a smooth process for you all.

Edited April 21, 2012 by ॐ

[Heather Kamal 0]

Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement. It gets depressing sometimes.

[tru_loves_journey 117]

Hi Heather, The folks on here offer very good advice. I must say what's sooo important is that your fiance's family knows you and that his parents accept you into their family. I have a 15 yr. old son but at the time we were in Egypt he was 13. I'm almost 18 years older than my husband and the CO at the embassy did not mention our age difference. BUT, the first thing she looked at in the interview was a picture of me and my now mother in law together and ask Hany, Who is in this photo? She looked over other family photo's as she waited for his reply. The CO was interested in our Wedding Invitation that I had in the evidence also. When my son and I went to Egypt in 2010 we stayed in my husbands family home that we were asked to stay by my husband's Mother and Father. We stayed 2 weeks and I was introduced to alottt of family members in different cities in Egypt. We took lotts of photo's. My Son and I were welcomed with open arms by all. At our engagemnet party so many friends and family attended. If the embassy were to send someone out to speak to your fiance's Mother and Father and they told the embassy personel that they had no clue you intended to marry their son, Then you would have wasted alot of money because it would all be over at that point. It's a must you are known by all! From that point save all proof of your trips, receipts, emails, lots of photos with family, chat logs, letters you received by mail from your fiance, everything that will help you prove that you have a "Real Relationship". I understand the depression you feel hearing this but you must be well prepared for this journey tears at your heart and soul, as so many here will agree. Pushbrk stated "I think it's best to marry and have both the commitment of marriage and the opportunity to stay together as man and wife some significant time prior to the visa interview". His advice is always good due to his time on VJ, he has seen alot! He also said "You've got time to do extensive reading and preparation, so do it. Ultimately what path to take is up to you." This is so TRUE! Welcome to VJ and Good Luck on your Journey

[Heather Kamal 0]

Thanks the problem is after marrying I have to come back to my job and children. I will not be able to stay in Egypt until his interview. My ex husband the father of my kids would never allow it.