Why did you decide to settle in the U.S. versus your spouse/fiance(e)'s native country?

[AKSinghSingh79 143]

Just curious, what factors contributed toward yours and your partner's decision to settle permanently in the U.S.?

Was it work reasons, family, financial, safety, or stricter immigration rules?

For us it was a combo of my student loans, my specific work skills that may not transfer to India, and my mother bursting into tears at the thought of me potentially moving to India.

We may very well decide to move back to India in the distant future but for now the U.S. works best for our current needs.

[FinallyDone:) 10]

well, my husband was already here when i met him.

I personally love colombia and I wouldnt mind living there

But, colombia isnt as finanically secure as us. and its a little dangerous(but so is the us)

The biggest decider for me was

1. would i find a job to pay me as much as I am making currently, can i afford a comfortable lifestyle with travel and things

2. am i willing to leave my family behind

3.loans i have for school,etc

4.my dreams(more oppurtunities here)

5. a great number of people in colombia dont even make US mimium wage. I commend those people there because they survive off next to nothing.

so after looking at all this we decided to stay because none of this played in our favor in colombia

instead i petitioned for my in laws to get a visa so they can see their children

it has been 8 years since they had seen their children.

(although this back fired on me because shortly after recieving their visa they started saying they hated me and wished my death)( stupid me for getting them the visa )

anyways.

[Alex & Rachel 78]

For me:

- I have a degree, my husband does not; i.e. my skills were more transferable

- Despite my degree, I was earning less in the UK than my husband was earning in the US at the time. Some salaries in the UK are surprisingly low!

- I fancied a change of scene! My husband is much more of a homebody.

- My parents have six kids, four of whom still live locally. My in-laws only have my husband still living locally, so I figured my parents could spare me more than his could spare him.

5. a great number of people in colombia dont even make US mimium wage. I commend those people there because they survive off next to nothing.

I wasn't actually making California minimum wage - and this was in the UK, with a not-incomparable cost of living! Of course, I had no need for a car and no need for healthcare, and as a result I actually managed to save more money there than I did in my first two years here. But many, many people in many other countries would be able to easily survive on below-minimum US wages; it's all about the cost of living in that particular country.

[arashsidhu 1]

I am Indian with Australian PR moving to US only to support parents in law in US.Don't wanna leave them alone.

[Bec_Dipu 103]

Our basis for choosing to start with the US instead of India:

1) I can't figure out the butt hose or the pitcher or water. I need western toilets and toilet paper.

2) A 30-year repayment period on my student loans - the almighty $ is stronger.

3) I am close to my family, my husband is not very close with his.

4) I don't like being stared at and it happens a lot when you look pretty different from the billion people around you. Freckles are not a skin disease by the way.

5) My husband and I met here while he was on assignment so we knew he would feel comfortable living here.

We have not chosen necessarily to stay in the US, it depends on if he is able to find work. If not, we will gladly move to Europe, Australia, the Bahamas, wherever outsourcing is going on that we can help with. We intend to rebuild his family home and eventually spend part of our retirement in India.

OP: "For us it was a combo of my student loans, my specific work skills that may not transfer to India, and my mother bursting into tears at the thought of me potentially moving to India."

Your ability to speak English with an American accent would get you tons of job offers in customer service/training in India. Just something to think about in the future.

[X Factor 1,112]

All my immediate family is is in the US. Plus the job their are more opportunities for my particular jobs.

[AKSinghSingh79 143]

Our basis for choosing to start with the US instead of India:

1) I can't figure out the butt hose or the pitcher or water. I need western toilets and toilet paper.

2) A 30-year repayment period on my student loans - the almighty $ is stronger.

3) I am close to my family, my husband is not very close with his.

4) I don't like being stared at and it happens a lot when you look pretty different from the billion people around you. Freckles are not a skin disease by the way.

5) My husband and I met here while he was on assignment so we knew he would feel comfortable living here.

We have not chosen necessarily to stay in the US, it depends on if he is able to find work. If not, we will gladly move to Europe, Australia, the Bahamas, wherever outsourcing is going on that we can help with. We intend to rebuild his family home and eventually spend part of our retirement in India.

OP: "For us it was a combo of my student loans, my specific work skills that may not transfer to India, and my mother bursting into tears at the thought of me potentially moving to India."

Your ability to speak English with an American accent would get you tons of job offers in customer service/training in India. Just something to think about in the future.

Thanks for the tip about job opportunities. I'll keep this in mind in case our visa journey takes a nose dive.

As for the staring, its very hard for me to tolerate as well. I lived in India for 6 months prior to meeting my fiance and never got used to the stares. Makes me think its something I could never fully come to tolerate.

I also can't stand when grown men ask me if they can take their picture with me. It's cute when kids ask but when twentysomething grown males approach me its a bit creepy and I suspect many do not have innocent intentions.

[Bec_Dipu 103]

Thanks for the tip about job opportunities. I'll keep this in mind in case our visa journey takes a nose dive.

As for the staring, its very hard for me to tolerate as well. I lived in India for 6 months prior to meeting my fiance and never got used to the stares. Makes me think its something I could never fully come to tolerate.

I also can't stand when grown men ask me if they can take their picture with me. It's cute when kids ask but when twentysomething grown males approach me its a bit creepy and I suspect many do not have innocent intentions.

I've lost count of the number of times I've had my bra strap pulled or had strangers run their fingers through my hair while "taking a picture with me".

I'm also not partial to some shoe vendor chasing me down the street and yelling that he has big shoes, big shoes that will fit me. I wear a 9, that's not huge for being 5'9".

And the freckles thing really seems to freak some people out...a few people asked if I was OK or if I was dying from a skin disease.

[kittylondon 47]

my fiance is about to finish medical school in the US, and his tuition has been covered by a primary care scholarship programme that requires he commit to a career in the US for a certain amount of years, or else pay back his tuition three fold!

we would both have been very happy to live in london or edinburgh otherwise - it was never my dream to live in the US and when we started dating i told him it wouldnt never happen... 3 years later... i find lots of things to be excited about by a future there! but in return for making the move now, he has promised we can retire to italy if it's possible, where i spent some of my childhood, and where i would truly love to live!

[AKSinghSingh79 143]

I've lost count of the number of times I've had my bra strap pulled or had strangers run their fingers through my hair while "taking a picture with me".

I'm also not partial to some shoe vendor chasing me down the street and yelling that he has big shoes, big shoes that will fit me. I wear a 9, that's not huge for being 5'9".

And the freckles thing really seems to freak some people out...a few people asked if I was OK or if I was dying from a skin disease.

I had one guy try to stick his tongue down my throat after agreeing to a "Photo". Of course Kirpal was not there at the time either but I've been wary about photos with men ever since. Did they do those inappropriate things in front of Dipu?

I feel your pain about the height. I'm 5' 10" and wear a size 11 shoe. No ready made clothes for me in India ever fit right.

Forget about shoes. I can barely find size 11 in the U.S.!

The freckle thing is bizarre. I never observed this personally as I don't have freckles but I do get a lot of attention about my eye color (blue eyes).

Edited April 17, 2012 by AKSinghSingh79

[afoyoswa 178]

We want to start out together in the U.S. because I am more established at this point than he is, and because we'd like to be able to travel freely into/out of the U.S. and other countries without hassle. The general plan at this point is to be based in his country once he is naturalized (which I would also like), but we'll see what happens in the intervening years.

I'm also not sure I'll ever get used to being stared at! In the U.S. I generally try to avoid attracting attention to myself, so it's hard to adjust to being so incredibly conspicuous simply by virtue of existing.

[Penguin_ie 5,997]

We did both. First, he came to live with me because it was easier and quicker for him to immigrate to Ireland, and I had a good career and a nice apartment, whereas he had a job he wasn't particularly interested in and was renting.

Then when we had the twins, we decided to move to Arkansas because he has family here (I have none in Ireland), we prefer Arkansas in terms of family values, and it's cheaper- we got a 4 bedroom home with a large yard here for a third of the price of our 1 bed apartment in Dublin.

[Amanda and Josh 12]

My husband wasn't brave enough to move to Australia!! I agreed to move to the US because the kids are all young enough to come with us now and get citizenship eventually which will make it easier for them to move around later. We would have been better off in Australia but.............. I'm only going for the love of my man

[UK_Fan 192]

i've been here since i was 15 and i don't even know what's a life in Russia like anymore, it's a foreign world to me now, so we really didn't even discuss going and living there. however, hubby said that he would come and live in Russia, if something happened with my papers and i wouldn't get approved, and become a commercial fisherman ahah

[N M 96]

Annette refused to move to "grey, damp" London. She's been over there dozens of times and claims she's never seen the sun.

So here we are in Colorado with its 300+ sunny days a year. Not keen on the bitterly cold, dry winters. But aside from that, I can't argue with her weather choice.