looking for MENA success stories

[Amber & Ahmed 133]

Lisamarie!!!! How are you doll???

[Lisamarie 79]

I'm doing great Amber, how are you?!?! So good to see you!! How is everything going? Hope it's wonderful

Lisamarie!!!! How are you doll???

[Amber & Ahmed 133]

Everything is going great. Ahmed and I made the move to Florida! So we are enjoying life together one mapquest adventure at a time LOL Wow its been awhile! Havent had much time for posting as Ahmed takes most of my time. However I stop thru and check on my VJ girls atleast one a week but I havent seen you! Im happy to hear all is well with you!

[Mithra 1,185]

I'm sorry but I don't buy the divorce is not an option #######. It's always an option and thank God for that. One never knows how life may go in the future. Never be so confident that marriage will always be good and love will always be there.

[Amber & Ahmed 133]

well Mithra for US it isnt an option and for US it isnt ####### so shut your yap eh. You shared your thoughts so pipe down and let me share mine. Enough said.

[Cathi 5,771]

well Mithra for US it isnt an option and for US it isnt ####### so shut your yap eh. You shared your thoughts so pipe down and let me share mine. Enough said.

[PMartin37 161]

On top of it, my husband wasn't able to work for several months and I wasn't used to having an adult just hanging out all the time not working. That was way difficult to deal with. Having someone in my face 24/7 was rough. LOL.

When I went to marry my husband, we were together 24/7 in a small flat he rents. I got to know his "habits and quirks" pretty quickly and it was just hilarious. We were bickering a bit here and there but I kept in my mind that those tiny things are not important in the grand scheme of things. What was important to me is that he SHOWED his love for me in the way that he cared for me. Even though he had a broken arm at the time we married, he still was so careful with me (like I was precious to him and he didn't want me to get broken). I wanted to be sure all of the qualities of my ex (who happened to be American) were not in my new husband. Not only that, my mother loves him! I told my mother if we could survive 6 weeks in such a tiny, confined space together we'd be fine for life.

[sandinista! 1,816]

well Mithra for US it isnt an option and for US it isnt ####### so shut your yap eh. You shared your thoughts so pipe down and let me share mine. Enough said.

Uncalled for. Nothing she said inhibits your ability to express yourself here. I'm really glad that the women I know on this forum and in real life who have suffered unconscionable abuses in their marriages didn't make dippy DIVORCE IS NEVER NEVER NOT EVER AN OPTION proclamations because they could very well be dead or in utter misery right now. And no, none of them ever, ever saw the hsitstorms they went through coming either. Good grief. This hsit isn't trite.

[sandinista! 1,816]

It's been a long, strange trip. Regardless of anything, I'd like you and your family to have some peace and happiness. You're all long overdue. I have no idea how you can get there, but do know there are people out there who do hope you can catch some breaks somewhere along the line.

You know what Sandinista? In some sad way, even after all we have been through on the boards, I just love the hell out of you. I just do Sandinista.. I must needed to read that.. LONG PROTRACTED SADISTIC ())()_...I know they are not the norm. I just love the way you verbalise things and always are bright and sharp..thank you.. I needed to read that LOL

[Amber & Ahmed 133]

Ahhhh here it starts... you catty ladies never quit I swear! Oh my goodness! Do you all ever get a life??? Even after almost 2 years of being a member on this site I find you all just never quit attacking certain people but by now you all shoould know by now your not going to intimidate me. The OP asked about our own specific marriage and I am answering for MY marriage. So why don't you all just knock it off and allow others to express what they want! You all dont get theright to say what others express... hmmmmm wonder where your other buddy is? Guess it was past her bedtime eh? Anyhow OP really it is a decision we all make... knowing your husband well and seeing the red flags (the ones only you can see) from the start helps... how is he witj women in general... how is his parent's marriage...is a huge help IMO I wish you the very best! As for me I am out of the soon to follow drama these ladies thrive on... if you want to talk please feel free to message me any time.

[sandinista! 1,816]

Are you just unfamiliar with how Internet forums/this site work? You can say whatever you like here, as long as it doesn't violate the site's TOS. No one is inhibiting your right to say whatever ridiculous things you want to say, and ANYONE CAN RESPOND and say they think it's ridiculous, provided they follow the same rules. God forbid you should defend your stance with a rational, coherent statement instead of complaining you feel like you can't express an opinion here. You did just that, and others just said they disagreed. Oh my God, sounds like a dialogue, whether you disagree with the opinions or not. Like it or not, anyone here could encounter total, irreconcilable deal breakers. It can, and does happen to anyone, no matter how adamantly they were committed to never divorcing. Abstract, absolutist I'LL NEVER GET A DIVORCE NO MATTER WHAT statements aren't what's keeping people together through rough patches or disagreements. It's not like everyone else who hasn't uttered those words is just bopping along, ready to get divorced over a dirty sock left on the floor, or financial problems. What if the OP has been divorced before? How does essentially saying she must not have been very committed before really help her or anyone else?

[Staashi 371]

Believe me, Amber, if one day you found out that Ahmed was a serial philander, mentally, physically or emotionally abusive, or he was sexually abusing your children or the neighbor's kids, you might find yourself wanting or begging for a divorce. All of these things have happened on this board and those women who were so in love in the beginning, and divorce was out of the question, too, were grateful to have that option.

Your statement though reminded me of a friend of mine. She and her husband were devout pentecostal Christians and had married at a young age. Divorce was never an option for them, too. However all bets were off for her when she came home and found her husband in bed with another man. After the shock wore off and the anger and realization of what was happening hit her, she asked how long had this been going on...since high school he said. He said, although he loved her as a wife/sister, the man he was with was his true love. She got a divorce within a month.

My husband is from Argentina, and the neighboring country, Chile, does not allow divorce. I have heard vile tales of what some women have had to deal with because of that law. I myself am grateful that it is an option should we need it here.

Which brings me to this point, nobody on this board gets married thinking about divorce...we all want the fairy tale of life, liberty, and marital happiness. However, as has been shown time and time again, sometimes the fairy tale turns into a nightmare.

[Nasturtium 500]

Ahhhh here it starts... you catty ladies never quit I swear! Oh my goodness! Do you all ever get a life??? Even after almost 2 years of being a member on this site I find you all just never quit attacking certain people but by now you all shoould know by now your not going to intimidate me. The OP asked about our own specific marriage and I am answering for MY marriage. So why don't you all just knock it off and allow others to express what they want! You all dont get theright to say what others express... hmmmmm wonder where your other buddy is? Guess it was past her bedtime eh? Anyhow OP really it is a decision we all make... knowing your husband well and seeing the red flags (the ones only you can see) from the start helps... how is he witj women in general... how is his parent's marriage...is a huge help IMO I wish you the very best! As for me I am out of the soon to follow drama these ladies thrive on... if you want to talk please feel free to message me any time.

I just want to know who the third buddy is!

[Beauty for Ashes 257]

I just want to know who the third buddy is!

maybe its me and I was in bed hahahahahh

You know how us old fat american whores are. We need our sleep

Ahhhh here it starts... you catty ladies never quit I swear! Oh my goodness! Do you all ever get a life??? Even after almost 2 years of being a member on this site I find you all just never quit attacking certain people but by now you all shoould know by now your not going to intimidate me. The OP asked about our own specific marriage and I am answering for MY marriage. So why don't you all just knock it off and allow others to express what they want! You all dont get theright to say what others express... hmmmmm wonder where your other buddy is? Guess it was past her bedtime eh? Anyhow OP really it is a decision we all make... knowing your husband well and seeing the red flags (the ones only you can see) from the start helps... how is he witj women in general... how is his parent's marriage...is a huge help IMO I wish you the very best! As for me I am out of the soon to follow drama these ladies thrive on... if you want to talk please feel free to message me any time.

Amber I do not know you from adam but I absolutely cannot say anything insulting to you.. All I know is that divorce obviously wasnt an option in my mind either which is why even after he did countless horrible things to me, I tried to write it off as religion, culture education, you name it. How can you know how someone is with women in general if while in his country, you only see what he wants you to see? Do you honestly think you are immune to trouble or your husband changing his mind about you 5 years down the line when he develops a large network of Egyptian friends and has economic security and he wants someone from his own culture or background? Do you think any of the women on this board went into these relationships without the very best of intentions.even the women with huge age gaps? I for one never ever agreed with all the embassy APs but after everything I have seen both stateside and over there, I am happy SOMEONE, ANYONE is looking over these files carefully. I can say as someone who has been left to file for divorce herself with no financial help to do so or cooperation and was used in every possible way, that I am devastated from this process. These women who you want to snark at have been the best mirror that I could see myself in that was available to me. No matter how bad we snark back and forth, there is not a single one that I would not answer the phone for, sit with , cry with or make myself available to. When my son died, one sat on the phone with me while I sobbed in the cemetary for hours. I cannot say that it has always been easy being on here. I can say that as a mother of a moroccan guy ( not the person I petitioned) I know for a fact that not everyone is psycho over there even though my husband really is as far as I am concerned, dangerous to my health. My moroccan ex and I did not have a bad breakup. He didnt want a child, he had a greencard and I wasnt willing to abort. He hemmed and hawed about it, called me and told me he had no interest in an american having is kid.. and said snarkily to me, if I wanted a baby , I wouldnt have her with you. If you can believe this, this was 7 years ago... I now warmly talk to him, he hasnt seen my daughter in 4 years almost but he calls her and sends her clothes and I dont feel a groundswell of hate about him. He wanted me to abort. I didnt. My pregnancy broke us up. But he didnt need me for papers and when you have that power dynamic, the world spins at a different angle. I dont know if my husband ever loved me or not honestly. I do know that I think his family only looked at me like a ticket to the US. I feel like I got to see what people were really like when I lost my son and not a single one offered me care or condolence. In fact , when I took him to visit extended family, I was told 7 months after my son died that I was fat and told all these nasty horrific things by them, never once holding me, telling me I am sorry or caring. I endured a year of no sex and not one kiss. I endured threats, emotional abuse. I went through things no one could ever imagine. I am glad divorce is an option for me albeit I am considering hiring a lawyer just because I do not want to be in the same room as him as proceedings start. I am devastated by the choices he made. I am absolutely not implying I was perfect but I never broke a single thing belonging to him, never broke an item of clothing or one of his possesions, never made him feel scared, never called his mother disgusting names or told him that he could not be friends with certain people.

So Amber my dear, you have been here 2 years, I have been here 6 and out of respect for the women on this board who have seen, experienced and viewed horrific marriage fraud, financial fraud and experienced the death actually of members, I respectfully but firmly request that you lay off Mithra because she was a wonderful albeit hard #### support of me and has never hesistated to give her opinion. I was a victim of marriage fraud and if there was anything I could have done to avoid it, I would have and resent the implication that somehow after losing my son and the other nonsense I went through, that a red flag would have been enough to save me from this. I wanted to be in love and to be with someone who accepted me for who I was . I dont come here asking for advice anymore. I am more here for comfort because sooner or later, although I could never imagine going through a divorce with this man, I will have to file and I am left to file all alone because he doesnt care one way or another if he is divorced. Thats because he never considered himself really married... as he told me as far as he is concerned, we are really married only on papers. Americans dont look at marriage like that. In other countries, especially ones where they have people that marry for papers, they accept and talk like that. I have never wished the karma truck would hit someone but I would not mind if it roughed up my husband a little. Not kill him but I want him to go through 1/20th of what he put me through the last 6 year

[Mithra 1,185]

ROFL!! I guess I've been told!

FYI this isn't the Amber and Ahmed love's fantasyland forum so I can pretty much share my thoughts whenever. Get real.

well Mithra for US it isnt an option and for US it isnt ####### so shut your yap eh. You shared your thoughts so pipe down and let me share mine. Enough said.