looking for MENA success stories

[Cathi 5,771]

Mabrookulations!!!! haha...gotta tell hubby that one

[Ihavequestions 419]

Mabrookulations on the divorce papers!

Shukrn habibti!

Lo and behold, probably the one thing that pirck I married didn't lie about was a divorce. Evidently, I've been a free woman since 2011. Of course, he gave the court an address that wasn't mine and that's where the papers were mailed to, but whatever.

Obviously you wouldn't win the committed to marriage Olympics. .

Nah, I wouldn't say that. I am, however, firmly in the it is an option camp. As much as I appreciate a sense of commitment, sometimes what looks like a train wreck really is a train wreck, and it's wise to jump off before it crashes.

By the way folks, it was Mithra who was supportive and, wow, sensible for me while I got my head together. I will appreciate that for all eternity and others (ahem!) would do well to pay attention to what she has to say.

[Ihavequestions 419]

Oh gosh there are so many memorable moments in MENA history...

Oh! Oh! Then there was the one who's husband sent a letter to the Embassy asking if he was required to live with his wife after he immigrated.

Truly memorable.

[Mithra 1,185]

*blushing*. Thank you!

Ugh that guy is unbelievable! I wish you much happiness in your new freedom. .

[Nasturtium 500]

Hey WOM! I've missed talking about gardens with you! I'm setting up my balcony and driving anyone who will listen nuts about it. We had to move for school, bleh. So now I have this north-facing recessed balcony which is a total no-go for most edibles

IHQ: sorry about your divorce, but hey, at least you got out more or less intact, right?

I think I win the committed relationship olympics if it involves double dog dares of devotion. I'm throwing myself in that ring.

I miss a good MO. What we need are more mena guys to come around-- they are the BEST. Also you cannot forget the relationships which resulted in spuncles.

Peterpan's grade has fallen to an F-. Why whine when you can try to start something so much better?

[LaL 418]

relationships which resulted in spuncles.

oh... NOW you have done it!!

[Nasturtium 500]

oh... NOW you have done it!!

that word still makes me laugh so much.

[Shoot Em Straight 385]

Inluvnwaiting- did you import your ex or did you meet and marry him in the US? If it's the latter- importing a guy is a different beast than meeting and marrying a MENA guy here. I was married to a MENA guy for 10 yrs prior to divorcing, meeting and marrying my current husband. Was your ex also Moroccan? If not, whole other thing entirely, too. I was confident that I had this in the bag because I was married to MENA before, too. Nope. Different man, different situation, different everything. Knowing the "rules" means nothing.

About the different personalities in the forum, I was new once upon a time so I know what it's like to try to "fit" in here. I have found that the ladies that are straight talkers or maybe a little blunt are the ones that give the best advice and generally are more down to earth and realistic. I much prefer that to the ladies who are caught up in warm fuzziness and are so lovesick that they don't make sense most of the time. These are the women that end up stabbing you in the back or fly off the handle when you disagree with them. They think with their hearts not their heads. They give horrible advice and encourage some wreckless behaviors. Some of us may not be warm and fuzzy but we have experience and know what we're talking about and we won't encourage you to do something you may regret one day.

Yes the whole thing could be entirely different if the MENA is an import and only by reading on here did I learn this. Never did that equation come up in my personal life with the first marriage.

Not a warm fuzzy posting gave me this info so I see your point and respect it

I do appreciate all the advice on here.

Just HAD to suggest for anyone and everyone... less cattiness will go much further. I only speak for my self and how it is a turn off when reading jabs (that are not even toward me) in what started as possibly as a good info thread goes to the usual "b**tch catfight" between the incoming 9th graders and the graduated "seniors" (high school sense not age )

It was not only in this current post. So maybe I see "straight talking" completely different from another persons view, But from the noob side or even the Philippines forum (random)smart ladies, your company included, know when it turns ugly it loses its flavor. Your good intentions get LOST.

There is enough drama in the OFF Topic to entertain people.

Not searching for warm fuzzies...

but here might be one.

Postscript....having read the recent posts on the topics you and the "grads" wrote with all the "craziness subjects" I missed in your past on VJ ..... I even appreciate MORE the fact the "experienced" ladies are still posting...and not given up the aid. Thank you for the

Sylvia

[LaL 418]

I would like a happy ending.

[Nasturtium 500]

I would like a happy ending.

That's what she said.

[Staashi 371]

MENA Gone Wild !

* Outed at the consulate in front of the petitioner.... as already having a wife !

* Posing for a pic, wearing the same tiara and dress that had belonged to her fiance's now-dead former fiancee, who had also petitioned for him !

* He finally gets the visa - only to be left at the altar - by the petitioner !

Oh gosh there are so many memorable moments in MENA history...

Hi WOM! Hope you're well.

Yes, I love all those stories. Sh!t so crazy you can't make it up.

[Peace.... 281]

I absolutely adore my husband and our marriage. We met in 2008 and have been married for over a year now and nothing has changed him or his way of thinking since his arrival here in the USA. Having a age difference of 15 years has never been an issue in our relationship and I don't sit around thinking about the what ifs all day. I will say this however, I do believe that men from MENA countries who practice their religion faithfully seem to have a better grasp on marriage and relationships as to those men who say they practice their religion and then drink, go to bars, hang out late hours of the night with the buddies, and then during the religious month of Ramadan they pray and fast all day. This just amazes me to this day to see men of Islam act like this and then they try to brain wash the wives that it's okay if they do this as this is the true way of Islam. Women are so naive when it comes to Islam as I was too when I first met Mohammed. I actually never knew anything about Islam. Only until after my first visit to Morocco, I started seeing a whole new world and a new religion. I guess you could say I had a "Ahhh" moment when I witness not only Mohammed praying but all the other thousands of muslims praying every day and some five times a day. It was then, I saw a whole different person then what I saw online. Online, I spoke with a sweet and caring person and we just chatted about every day life. However when we met in person, I saw a man who was passionate about God and his family. My husband came from such a loving home and watching him interact with this mother and the way he respected her and helped her around the home was just an eye opener for me. There were days when his grandmother was so weak to walk that Mohammed would carry her up 5 flights of stairs with no hesitation at all. I left Morocco with a sense of love and respect from not only his family but those I met on the streets as well.

I can say that the four years we have been together have just been amazing. My husband is a wonderful family man, and enjoys just being home with me and spending quality time together. I tried to make his move here painless and easy but honestly, I didn't have to do much. He adjusted so well and life for him here is great. He just got his green card in April, and got a job and is working very hard and long hours and he still manages to come home with a smile on his face and a hug and kiss for me. His new boss was very compassionate and offered him a 2 hour lunch on Fridays so that he could go to the Mosque and pray which was extremely nice on her behalf if I must say.

I have read on here where someone said " wait until 5 years go by and then" but honestly, there is no difference if I was 25 years old, he could still go and find anyone if he truly wanted too what is going to stop him or even more what is going to stop me from wanting someone else???? This is life..... No couple can see into the future as to the what ifs, but I can tell you one thing, we are making a great life together on this day and are looking forward to many more wonderful and loving years together.

Now on that note; gonna gently crawl into bed and rest my head on his chest and gently wake him up..... this brings the sweetest smile to his face and I get a greattttttttttttttttt big hug.

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

Hey WOM! I've missed talking about gardens with you! I'm setting up my balcony and driving anyone who will listen nuts about it. We had to move for school, bleh. So now I have this north-facing recessed balcony which is a total no-go for most edibles

IHQ: sorry about your divorce, but hey, at least you got out more or less intact, right?

I think I win the committed relationship olympics if it involves double dog dares of devotion. I'm throwing myself in that ring.

I miss a good MO. What we need are more mena guys to come around-- they are the BEST. Also you cannot forget the relationships which resulted in spuncles.

Peterpan's grade has fallen to an F-. Why whine when you can try to start something so much better?

Hey garden girl ! I totally suck this year on the veggie patch... finally got some tomatoes in last week, a couple of green peppers and eggplants... nothing else yet

Ah well there's still time to boil some okra seeds

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

Hi WOM! Hope you're well.

Yes, I love all those stories. Sh!t so crazy you can't make it up.

Good to see you, Staashi !

We've had some pure Jerry Springer in here for sure. And people wonder why we could be somewhat jaded....

[PalestineMyHeart 1,897]

I was not clear in my post here. Revisions in italics:

Now to the nitty gritty.

The couples with more than a 15-year or so difference are not as common as the other groups, but I have seen a lot more here than I expected to see.

The divorce rate is much higher among this group. Again, the split often occurs after the immigrant spouse reaches some milestone. But we have some couples here with this range of age difference that are still going after 6-7-8 years.

Of the couples with a 20-year difference or more -

Very, very, very few of these marriages have survived beyond 5 years or so. I think 3 of the surviving couples have already been mentioned, there may be 1 more. None of them have reached the 10-year mark yet - I think some have been married around 8 years or so. In my opinion, these couples involve exceptional people on both sides.

Of the members here who have come back to speak about their break-ups, some mentioned a history of troubles within the relationship before the final split. We have heard some wild dramas for sure. But a surprising number of our members have said they never saw it coming.

Then there was that one gal who said she knew from the get-go her relationship wouldn't last, but was just gonna "enjoy the ride" with her young stuff while she got the chance.

VJ... where you see it all...