Crazy ex wife.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Car accident?

I'm sorry but I had to lol.

[Ruffie 22]

I'm going to assume you're living in Germany, the ex is German and the whole custody stuff is going through the Jugendamt. If your fiance doesn't have sole custody, he cannot PCS out of Germany WITH the kids unless the mother gives up on her custodial rights. And honestly, I don't think I don't think a U. S. visa forum is the right place to figure out custody arrangements in a country that has a completely different legal system than the U. S. Talk to a lawyer who knows what they're doing.

[VanessaTony 3,567]

I'm going to assume you're living in Germany, the ex is German and the whole custody stuff is going through the Jugendamt. If your fiance doesn't have sole custody, he cannot PCS out of Germany WITH the kids unless the mother gives up on her custodial rights. And honestly, I don't think I don't think a U. S. visa forum is the right place to figure out custody arrangements in a country that has a completely different legal system than the U. S. Talk to a lawyer who knows what they're doing.

Where on earth did you get that from? The new fiancee is a German K1. It reads like the USC lives in the US due to the references to CPS in a couple of posts and also "if my fiance gets stationed in another state". It's likely the German fiancee is visiting the US at the moment or is talk about the future "living with us" but I certainly don't get "Germany" from any post. No.. think you're WAY off base here.

Edited April 14, 2012 by Vanessa&Tony

[BethandBilly 86]

In some states yes a mother has automatic right, but more and more states are coming round to the idea of 50/50 custody time with each parent. Unfortunately unless CPS is reporting to the court their concerns about the mothers fitness to take care of the kids there is little a court will do with regards giving the daddy sole custody. You cannot be seen to be on a witchhunt for the kids Mom, that will look bad for you, what you need to do is document every exchange and if you are in a state that allows you to video the exchanges and record the conversations then you should do so, may be it is something you should look up online. If the children are in counselling what is the counsellor saying, are her findings going to help you in court? I don't know your full story, but I do have experience of dealing with ex wives and we battle with my hubbys ex every time we try to have contact with the kids. My step kids have been through the mill with their Moms various husbands and boyfriends and no court in the land is willing to help us regarding their safety, even CPS has called us and told us what is going on but they're not willing to go to court about it.

I wish you good luck with everything and for the kids I hope it works out well, they didn't ask to be born and brought in to this mess, they deserve a good, happy, healthy and safe life.

[C&Q 25]

I'm going to assume you're living in Germany, the ex is German and the whole custody stuff is going through the Jugendamt. If your fiance doesn't have sole custody, he cannot PCS out of Germany WITH the kids unless the mother gives up on her custodial rights. And honestly, I don't think I don't think a U. S. visa forum is the right place to figure out custody arrangements in a country that has a completely different legal system than the U. S. Talk to a lawyer who knows what they're doing.

His ex wife is American and both her and my fiance are in the states.

[C&Q 25]

Child custody is a right of a mother, but sometimes she can lose the rights due to special factors. Usually the mother loses custody in cases of abuse,abandonment and confirmed neglect of a child. The mother can regain custody after a while if she files a motion to obtain a custody modification, if it's enough evidence to warrant a retrial of the custody hearing then the custody may be modified.

Regarding to move out of the State some States do require written consent from the non-custodial parent. Since the custodial parent proof

that is not an attempt to restrict the former wife to access the children and if it's in the best interests of the children in relocation then the Court may grant the relocation. The most important thing is that the children do not get caught in the crossfire.

CPS already investigated 1-2 years ago because she neglected them, she tried to kill herself several times, alcohol and drug abuse (even in front of the kids)... She didn't leave out anything

I talked to my fiance yesterday and he told me it looked pretty good for us, he could gather some more documents from CPS... Fingers crossed everything will be fine.

[C&Q 25]

In some states yes a mother has automatic right, but more and more states are coming round to the idea of 50/50 custody time with each parent. Unfortunately unless CPS is reporting to the court their concerns about the mothers fitness to take care of the kids there is little a court will do with regards giving the daddy sole custody. You cannot be seen to be on a witchhunt for the kids Mom, that will look bad for you, what you need to do is document every exchange and if you are in a state that allows you to video the exchanges and record the conversations then you should do so, may be it is something you should look up online. If the children are in counselling what is the counsellor saying, are her findings going to help you in court? I don't know your full story, but I do have experience of dealing with ex wives and we battle with my hubbys ex every time we try to have contact with the kids. My step kids have been through the mill with their Moms various husbands and boyfriends and no court in the land is willing to help us regarding their safety, even CPS has called us and told us what is going on but they're not willing to go to court about it.

I wish you good luck with everything and for the kids I hope it works out well, they didn't ask to be born and brought in to this mess, they deserve a good, happy, healthy and safe life.

I guess we are lucky that the judge is on our side - at least I had the impression that she was - and with everything we have (CPS, statement from HER mother, police reports, statements from the Army, etc) I think it looks pretty good for us *fingers crossed* I just wasn't aware of the fact that she will still have visitation rights but we will have to deal with it.

Court date is soon and I will let everyone know how it went

[Darnell 8,478]

Well to be honest I don't know whether CPS made a formal report to the court but we have several documents from them that we will present to the judge end of April.

You should really find out.

CPS, being good or bad, varies by scope and intent and focus.

If that office is doing visitation because of a court order, that's one type of focus.

If that office is doing visitation because one the parent's filed a complaint, that's another type of focus.

There are ways to 'make' CPS work in your favor, but YOUR approach must be focused, the RIGHT focus. Think about it a bit, aye?

In the end, a judge pays attention to a CPS report. Think about that, as well.

There are different types of visitation, as well. Try to dig deep into 'supervised visitation' for your area, learn a bit about what that means. IMO, supervised visitation is much better for the kids, there's another human there (not you or your spouse) that can intervene on any silliness the mother might bring.

Edited April 14, 2012 by Darnell

[C&Q 25]

There are different types of visitation, as well. Try to dig deep into 'supervised visitation' for your area, learn a bit about what that means. IMO, supervised visitation is much better for the kids, there's another human there (not you or your spouse) that can intervene on any silliness the mother might bring.

We will definitely do that, no doubt

[Krikit 1,164]

Post violating the TOS has been removed, along with the one quoting it, and member banned from thread.

[Ruffie 22]

Where on earth did you get that from? The new fiancee is a German K1. It reads like the USC lives in the US due to the references to CPS in a couple of posts and also "if my fiance gets stationed in another state". It's likely the German fiancee is visiting the US at the moment or is talk about the future "living with us" but I certainly don't get "Germany" from any post. No.. think you're WAY off base here.

I guess I didn't read the opening post thoroughly enough because my mind somehow added "in Europe" to the "the kids live with my fiance and me"

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Post violating the TOS has been removed, along with the one quoting it, and member banned from thread.

Phew. wasn't me.

[BethandBilly 86]

I know you have the kids living with you, but having you and Daddy gone to do parenting classes, believe it or not a Judge may look at that as a good thing and it may well go in your favour, ask your lawyer what they think about that.

[Deb+Steve 13]

Phew. wasn't me.

Was it a car accident?

[C&Q 25]

Was it a car accident?

Well, couple days ago she really texted him saying that she had got in a car accident and she didn't know whether she can make it to the court date ...