=((((((((( Fiance just found out he has cancer

[Lyric 0]

Forgive me if I am being repetitive. I just don't know where to post this and I am a nervous wreck right now. I don't even know if I'm posting this in the right forum but I need help. He was just diagnosed by his doctor in Canada as having stomach cancer and it is very possible it has already spread. I have been told to talk to my congressman's office and see if they can do anything. I am so scared. What do I do??? How do I approach them? What kind of questions do I ask them? Do I go in and beg them to have compassion on us and let him still come here asap?

He hasn't even had his medical exam for the interview. He thought he was going to have plenty of time but scheduling conflicts were happening and then he got really sick.

He needs medical care but he can't get insurance here now b/c of pre-existing condition. BUT He has no one in Canada to take care of him. And he doesn't want anyone else to talke care of him but me in the first place. He NEEDS someone to be able to take him back and forth to the doctor appts and be there for and after surgery. Besides that fact, he needs me with him and I need to be able to take care of him. PERIOD. I can't bear the thought of being separated from him while he is so sick. We don't know how bad it is exactly and we don't know how long he has.

I can't sleep, I am barely eating. I can't stop crying. I am a nervous wreck and everytime I think about how he is feeling, being there alone and so, so sick I really start falling apart. He is the love of my life and I am the love of his life. We need to be together NOW. Oh please someone tell me what to do! Tell me how I can get help and get him here and get him medical care immediately. He has to have surgery and chemotherapy. That is all I know right now.

I have been praying and praying. I can't even talk to the congressman's office until tomorrow!! Stupid holiday today.

Please pray for us. Please.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Forgive me if I am being repetitive. I just don't know where to post this and I am a nervous wreck right now. I don't even know if I'm posting this in the right forum but I need help. He was just diagnosed by his doctor in Canada as having stomach cancer and it is very possible it has already spread. I have been told to talk to my congressman's office and see if they can do anything. I am so scared. What do I do??? How do I approach them? What kind of questions do I ask them? Do I go in and beg them to have compassion on us and let him still come here asap?

He hasn't even had his medical exam for the interview. He thought he was going to have plenty of time but scheduling conflicts were happening and then he got really sick.

He needs medical care but he can't get insurance here now b/c of pre-existing condition. BUT He has no one in Canada to take care of him. And he doesn't want anyone else to talke care of him but me in the first place. He NEEDS someone to be able to take him back and forth to the doctor appts and be there for and after surgery. Besides that fact, he needs me with him and I need to be able to take care of him. PERIOD. I can't bear the thought of being separated from him while he is so sick. We don't know how bad it is exactly and we don't know how long he has.

I can't sleep, I am barely eating. I can't stop crying. I am a nervous wreck and everytime I think about how he is feeling, being there alone and so, so sick I really start falling apart. He is the love of my life and I am the love of his life. We need to be together NOW. Oh please someone tell me what to do! Tell me how I can get help and get him here and get him medical care immediately. He has to have surgery and chemotherapy. That is all I know right now.

I have been praying and praying. I can't even talk to the congressman's office until tomorrow!! Stupid holiday today.

Please pray for us. Please.

Sorry to hear of this, my thoughts are with both of you. While getting the visa is important, perhaps in view of this, and the potential costs of securing insurance coverage for a pre-existing condition, have you thought of joining him until he's on the mend and through the chemotherapy treatment, and then dealing with the visa at that time?

Edited October 9, 2006 by diadromous mermaid

[Lyric 0]

yes I have thought of that but I don't know how we will do it. He has no one to rely on, he will not be able to work and I wouldn't be able to just go there and get a job. We'd have no place to live. Like I said he has no one to count on up there. It's all such a horrible nightmare

[payxibka 10,045]

yes I have thought of that but I don't know how we will do it. He has no one to rely on, he will not be able to work and I wouldn't be able to just go there and get a job. We'd have no place to live. Like I said he has no one to count on up there. It's all such a horrible nightmare

This is simply my personal opinion, but I do not think his condition as described is a cause for denial. I think it is predominantly conatagious diseases like STD's, TB, AIDS and alike. I believe there is somesort of list that gives you an idea of the types of medical conditions. Hopefully someone knows of the link. I could be wrong but I would push forward with my chin up! I think I would still get the congressman's advocate involved however. Good luck!

[Lyric 0]

Yes, as I understand he cannot be denied for cancer. I just worry about paying for everything and so does he. But he can't be left up there with no help. Either way it is a mess. But I would rather go in debt and have him here if that is what it takes.

[Flames9_RN 358]

One could contact the Mtl consualte and see if they can move it up, then if not successful, contact ur congress person. best of luck

[Lyric 0]

I will be going to the Congressman's office tomorrow first thing and speak with them in person. They are closed today due to Columbus day and of course it is Thanksgiving in Canada today so MTL consulate is closed. I figure the congressman's office will have more pull than I could ever have, so I'll ask them to please contact Montreal immediately and ask them to please do whatever they can to make this easier on us. We'll need luck with that, I'm sure

[JenT 0]

You have to be with him at all costs. Just try to stay calm and focus your efforts on that.

I'm so sorry, Lyric.

Jen

[mercy 1]

Lyric I am so sorry to hear about this. It's just terrible, we'll be thinking about both of you. If it's not possible for him to get insurance in the US, in the long run would it not be cheaper to find a way for you to both stay in Canada where his care is covered? I know from personal experience that members of Parliament are very willing and able to help get cases expedited. He'd probably qualify to get some sort of social assistance, like employment insurance to hold you both over for a little while. Otherwise I hope your congressman is able to help. You're in my thoughts.

[Cristy 4]

I am sorry to hear this:( You may want to consider going to Canada and staying with him while he gets treatment.

I will tell you with my husbands insurance they said as long as we had health insurance (showed our health cards from Canada) they would cover any pre existing conditions.

[Lyric 0]

Lyric I am so sorry to hear about this. It's just terrible, we'll be thinking about both of you. If it's not possible for him to get insurance in the US, in the long run would it not be cheaper to find a way for you to both stay in Canada where his care is covered? I know from personal experience that members of Parliament are very willing and able to help get cases expedited. He'd probably qualify to get some sort of social assistance, like employment insurance to hold you both over for a little while. Otherwise I hope your congressman is able to help. You're in my thoughts.

I wouldn't even know where to start. His living situation is volatile in the first place. I don't know who to contact or how. I know nothing about Canada getting around and all that. I only have one other friend up there that could 'possibly' even begin to help some. I just thought it would be easier here b/c I have friends and family, a job and so forth.

Right now I'm feverishly trying to find good cancer centers that deal a lot with his type of cancer here in the U.S. and what kind of help we could possibly get. So far University of Chicago seems like a good place to go if we could get help on lodging and travel and such along with the medical bills of course. I don't know. My head is just swimming and I'm operating on about 90 minutes of sleep today.

[evilcanuck 0]

I would let him stay in Canada where he can get (free) care. i would also get him to file petitions for you to come there, and have things expedited based on his illness, so that you can come there to care for him, and they may expedite your work permits based on this. There are also government programs and charities that would assist him with finances whle he is undergoing treatment. I dunno, thats the angle I would work, you are more likely to get the compassionate assistance if you go there...and not be stuck with a medical bill that will bankrupt you before you even marry. When he is better, then work on moving to the usa...

just a thought

[Flames9_RN 358]

This past April my wife went to an emergency room to get her ankle looked at . She sprained it at softball. Saw the Amount insurance was charged and for that few minutes the emergency room DR saw her, and xrays, the bill (that insurance was charged) was close to $1400!! If one doesnt have insurance, would be a lot more.

[Lyric 0]

Can you give me links or phone numbers or anything on this kind of assistance in Canada? I need all the help I can get. I know it makes more sense, financially for him to stay there and get medical paid for. At the same time, I feel that maybe he could get BETTER treatment here, even though we most likely can't get financial help. sigh. It's all so frustrating and confusing. We just don't know what to do. I'm trying to do all this myself b/c he is not feeling well and is so upset, it's hard to even be able to talk with him right now to figure out what route to go.

[Flames9_RN 358]

http://www.canada.gc.ca/main_e.html MAin Cdn Governemt page, and then use the search feauture I guess. I'm sure others will post better sites