HOW DO YOU DEAL

[memlaura 60]

I so wish my husbands country had reliable network to Skype and cam for 10 minutes. Commute is too dangerous to take out phone and text and talk to me. So much of our conversations lately has been texting and email. But as stated its temporary and WE in this journey are building the strongest relationships ever.

If only immigration could just put a bug in us and watch us and witness what we all go through and suffer the separation pains. Maybe than they would be less quick to judge our intentions. LOL

I will check with my husband what connection he has because we Skype every day just about and usually for an hour or 2 I know we have had issues with the connection and he has tried a couple of providers but dont give up when we get dropped we just call each other back lol... As annoying as the connections are I thank God for Skype it really does make it easier to deal with the distance when I get to see his smile every day...

[tabel 8]

Skype, Skype, Skype, & more Skype..ummm did i mention SKYPE!!! Thank god for the individual who invented that program!!!!

[reginakrys 33]

Mostly Skype, but we also use Facebook and Magicjack..

[Andrea&Henry 311]

This is one of the greatest topic I've ever read!You think you know other's experience but we have no idea jajajaja. But is funny how we all identify with our experience about having long distance relationships. Sometimes it sucks, but the distance has taught us how much we love each, and appreciate every single second we can share together, made us appreciate our relationship even more cause we basically had to fight for it. There's a saying in spanish that basically says the good things in life are the ones you have to work your #### for. JAJAJAJAJAJA we see other relationships, normal and regular ones and I feel like we are not like them, we are so closed to each other, we love each other so much and we never take anything for granted. I learnt that is not about how much time we spend together is about quality time, choose well our battles and fights.

Maybe sounds crazy but I think we all here are pretty lucky about finding our real soulmates, and fight for been together. I think we are all bless despite all the wait, anxiouness, all the sadness we feel everytime we miss our loveones.

A week ago OUR visa was approved by the embassy and the only thing I'm waiting for is my passport. My fiance left 2 days ago, with all my clothes and some of my belongings. And he's waiting for me at home. It's weird start packing your stuff, I quited my job yesterday and I work til friday. I still can't believe that we finally made it after 7 month of long waiting. I know that we're gonna fight and argue, sometimes good days, sometimes bad days...but we both know our way back home, and he's my home. Everytime you'll fight, remember all the things we all had to go through and think about all the people who were denied and they are still fighting.

I've seen tons of couples who basically live in the same place, but they're NOT together...being "together" is not about 2 persons in the same room, means 2 people that love each other, share, talks, support each other everyday. I don't need to be in the same room with my fiance to feel that we are together, cause we already are. Like a song in spanish says: "Uno no esta donde esta el cuerpo, sino donde mas lo extrañan" I 'll try to translate :"We are not where our body is, but where they (our loveones) miss us more".

I hope you all make it, and finally be with with your loveones. God bless you all

Andrea & Henry

[Mich &Del 0]

It is difficult but totally worth it! I spend a lot of time and $$ on the phone. And I visit whenever I can! Trying to stay sane while going through the visa process is hard but I try to keep positive!

[BlueBonnet 84]

For us, we met in an online game. So we continued to use that as our main way to stay in touch in the evenings. We used the phone ( I had a great flat rate fee ), even falling asleep on the phone every night. We would rent the same movie and watch it together over the computers while using a ventrilo server. Of course there was emails and random calls during the day. Ive heard of people going out and purchasing the same foods through the day, then using a camera to cook together and eat dinner together. Theres also a site I found along time ago where you can go on virtual holidays together. We also used to play on pogo.com, some backgammon, battleship or dominos, or sometimes we would gang up on others in spades while talking on vent so we each knew each other hands. We were lucky too that one year, I went to see him every 3 months. But its about sharing your life with each other as much as possible, its the constant contact.

Good luck, it really does get better.

And we, as people in LDRs, are kinda lucky. Because we will always understand what it is like to truly appreciate being able to be with the person you love, once you get to be with them.

[robertntess2012 0]

Well if you both can affoard it, have a high speed connection too you should web cam, talk daily and nightly, write each other and chat often!

For my lady and I , its been very difficult in every way imaginable. Keeping busy, planning, and keeping our relationship strong by being part of each others daily life and routine is really important for us.

We chat/talk every morning or night unless we can't. Having core values, knowing what we want, need, expect

from each other helps.

I always make a video on the weekends for her. On special occassions I do that too and have my family and friends try to include her as if she there. I talk and nariate.

WE all pray that the medical goes well next week and the interview next month goes well.

Thats what we do.

Edited April 10, 2012 by robertntess2012

[LA&JK 16]

Skype 2-3 times a week, phone everyday multiple times, nonstop texts (3000 a month lol) gmail chat at work.

Thank god for iPhone apps! Even though I am in Europe I got my "American" # thru this application so we can talk and text for free nonstop (and we do! Haha)

Plus I work for an American company and start my shift at 3pm my time (9am his time) so we have the same sleeping schedule too:)

I jsaw my baby in august and November and march for 2 weeks each time and gonna see him again in June yay - 65 days left!!

I wish we had more days off though :/

6 more months and hopefully we will be together for good!!!

[Penguin_ie 5,994]

** Inappropriate post and those quoting/ discussing same removed. In the immigration forums, people come for help with their immigration issues, not judgement. ****

[PantomimeGoose 59]

After being tethered to a computer *talking* about camping and climbing and traveling together for two and a half years, I completely sympathize with Kimmie about smashing her blackberry, and the poster who said it was sometimes harder to communicate. It's been great to read everybody's inspirational words on here over the months, but those comments hit home especially for me because we're all in great relationships, struggling to make it the same as if we were "normal couples" who can sit side by side, in silence, doing nothing and feel content (to say nothing of hiking and the stuff we'd really prefer to be doing, with the person we'd really prefer to be doing it with). The difference is the physical absence, and it's glaring. About 6 months into this process, we put a moratorium on the use of the words "soon" and "someday".

Now that this is almost over, we've been through times when we called all the time, times when we spoke every few days, times we skyped each other to sleep, and times when we only emailed. Sometimes we've been frustrated, sometimes we've been blissfully happy, sometimes we've been angry at the process or even each other, sometimes we've been worried, sometimes optimistic, sometimes it seems like we've been living this way so long that it's as pleasantly routine as any other routine. It's hard to put into words. Truth is (at least for me) you don't exactly deal...you just muddle through and try to make the best of it. It gets better, it gets worse, it gets better again and then worse than you ever imagined. Sometimes, it feels kinda like this: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/

Now that it's almost over, I can't believe it's almost over. I think living together is going to be as much of a weirdly, bizarrely, perplexingly happy adjustment as living apart was a sad one.

[Ayman___ 92]

After being tethered to a computer *talking* about camping and climbing and traveling together for two and a half years, I completely sympathize with Kimmie about smashing her blackberry, and the poster who said it was sometimes harder to communicate. It's been great to read everybody's inspirational words on here over the months, but those comments hit home especially for me because we're all in great relationships, struggling to make it the same as if we were "normal couples" who can sit side by side, in silence, doing nothing and feel content (to say nothing of hiking and the stuff we'd really prefer to be doing, with the person we'd really prefer to be doing it with). The difference is the physical absence, and it's glaring. About 6 months into this process, we put a moratorium on the use of the words "soon" and "someday".

Now that this is almost over, we've been through times when we called all the time, times when we spoke every few days, times we skyped each other to sleep, and times when we only emailed. Sometimes we've been frustrated, sometimes we've been blissfully happy, sometimes we've been angry at the process or even each other, sometimes we've been worried, sometimes optimistic, sometimes it seems like we've been living this way so long that it's as pleasantly routine as any other routine. It's hard to put into words. Truth is (at least for me) you don't exactly deal...you just muddle through and try to make the best of it. It gets better, it gets worse, it gets better again and then worse than you ever imagined. Sometimes, it feels kinda like this: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/

Now that it's almost over, I can't believe it's almost over. I think living together is going to be as much of a weirdly, bizarrely, perplexingly happy adjustment as living apart was a sad one.

You hit the nail right on the head :thumbs:So many Emotions when your going through this process

[dwheels76 5,468]

After being tethered to a computer *talking* about camping and climbing and traveling together for two and a half years, I completely sympathize with Kimmie about smashing her blackberry, and the poster who said it was sometimes harder to communicate. It's been great to read everybody's inspirational words on here over the months, but those comments hit home especially for me because we're all in great relationships, struggling to make it the same as if we were "normal couples" who can sit side by side, in silence, doing nothing and feel content (to say nothing of hiking and the stuff we'd really prefer to be doing, with the person we'd really prefer to be doing it with). The difference is the physical absence, and it's glaring. About 6 months into this process, we put a moratorium on the use of the words "soon" and "someday".

Now that this is almost over, we've been through times when we called all the time, times when we spoke every few days, times we skyped each other to sleep, and times when we only emailed. Sometimes we've been frustrated, sometimes we've been blissfully happy, sometimes we've been angry at the process or even each other, sometimes we've been worried, sometimes optimistic, sometimes it seems like we've been living this way so long that it's as pleasantly routine as any other routine. It's hard to put into words. Truth is (at least for me) you don't exactly deal...you just muddle through and try to make the best of it. It gets better, it gets worse, it gets better again and then worse than you ever imagined. Sometimes, it feels kinda like this: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/

Now that it's almost over, I can't believe it's almost over. I think living together is going to be as much of a weirdly, bizarrely, perplexingly happy adjustment as living apart was a sad one.

Excellently put. WOW hit every feeling emotion. And wow honesty. I tell my NON-Via friend long distance relationships with people outside of the US is not for the weak or weary. This is truly a marathon. I love this topic.

[amyandjorge 76]

We talked on the phone (I know, old-fashioned right?) for 15 mins every day, at least. Reason being, he could activate a 15 min USA minutes. I also sent him about a billion text messages through free apps. We tried Skype, internet connection in Honduras is unsatisfactory or unreliable. Lucky for me, plane tickets weren't too expensive and I could easily get time off work. 7 trips in 2 years

This may sound weird but towards the end (in my defense it was Christmas time) I would go out and buy my husband Christmas and birthday presents if I saw something he might like. Fun things and useful things, like razors and socks.

Actually spent a lot of time shopping for him. I would send him boxes of clothes that I bought for super cheap that he could sell or trade, which helped a lot come time for a round trip ticket and a week worth of staying with his relatives. It was like we were both always working toward my next trip and seeing each other.

Whew! so glad all that is behind me! At the time, it seemed like it would never end, now it's more like a bad dream and I'm awake and pinching him everday!

Edited April 13, 2012 by amyandjorge

[LeftCoastLady 441]

We talked on the phone (I know, old-fashioned right?) for 15 mins every day, at least. Reason being, he could activate a 15 min USA minutes. I also sent him about a billion text messages through free apps. We tried Skype, internet connection in Honduras is unsatisfactory or unreliable. Lucky for me, plane tickets weren't too expensive and I could easily get time off work. 7 trips in 2 years

This may sound weird but towards the end (in my defense it was Christmas time) I would go out and buy my husband Christmas and birthday presents if I saw something he might like. Fun things and useful things, like razors and socks.

Actually spent a lot of time shopping for him. I would send him boxes of clothes that I bought for super cheap that he could sell or trade, which helped a lot come time for a round trip ticket and a week worth of staying with his relatives. It was like we were both always working toward my next trip and seeing each other.

Whew! so glad all that is behind me! At the time, it seemed like it would never end, now it's more like a bad dream and I'm awake and pinching him everday!

Not weird at all!

During a Skype session earlier this week, my fiancé mentioned how much he loved this brand of salt & vinegar potato chips that are only available on the West Coast. (He bought a bag to stow in his carry-on for his trip back to the UK, but didn't get to eat them until he was home.) Yesterday morning, I went to the store, bought four bags of the chips and then went to the post office to send them his way, along with a love note inside. It's the little things like that where they know you're thinking about them.

[Darkmoonfaerie 19]

Skype, every day (even when sleeping ).

I thought we were the only crazy people who did this (but insert oovoo for skype)