If you could do it all again...

[Jaylen Brit 0]

I don't mean 'marry the person', or 'move' I mean planning things, preparations, expectations and such.

If you, with your current benefit of hindsight, had your time over again, what would you do differently?

Would there be things you'd bring with you?

Things you'd leave behind?

Arrangements you wish you'd taken more time over?

Talks with your SO / Subjects you wish you'd covered before you emigrated?

Things you wish you'd taken more time to research?

I know we all say 'If only I'd known back then' or ' I wish I'd taken time to...'

What?

Share your wisdom and maybe benefit others

[daisy16 0]

I would not have moved to the US I would have had him move to Canada. This was a huge step down for me - I went from middle class to poor. I didn't think through how I would live here compared to how we would live there.

[gimygirl 0]

I would not have moved to the US I would have had him move to Canada. This was a huge step down for me - I went from middle class to poor. I didn't think through how I would live here compared to how we would live there.

well, that really blows, daisy! *hug*

as for us .... i would have just had geoff stay here. since i was going through a lengthy divorce at the time, we couldn't start the K1 process until that was complete. he should have just overstayed on his VWP and adjusted like that (since it's forgiven when you marry a USC). but we didn't know that at the time and he just went back and forth on the VWP until he was eventually denied entry!

of course, my divorce could have gone through a lot sooner, but my children and their happiness is of utmost importance to geoff and i. he is an amazing man and waited over 600 days in england until i was award sole physical/legal custody of my children! now we have a lifetime together because we were able to set our feelings aside and do what was right for nico & gabriella! that, i would NEVER change!

Edited January 30, 2006 by gimygirl

[MichelleandCraig 1]

We would have left more time between the actual move and getting the visa. We were online booking it and were so excited to finally be together we kept moving up the date, looking at the flights, changing our minds again...and moving itup. We were SO excited we could finally be together Craig moved 6 days after he'd gotten his visa. He has said many times, and I agree, it would have been a good idea to wait a few months and let thoughts get sorted out/settled more instead of a quick round of goodbyes and out the door. I wanted to be with Craig more than anything right away, but I(and he)really regret that now. Michelle

[ChristinaM 0]

as for us .... i would have just had geoff stay here. since i was going through a lengthy divorce at the time, we couldn't start the K1 process until that was complete. he should have just overstayed on his VWP and adjusted like that (since it's forgiven when you marry a USC). but we didn't know that at the time and he just went back and forth on the VWP until he was eventually denied entry!

Funny you should say that.....

If I could do it all again, I wouldn't have adjusted from the VWP! It was more stressful than it should have been, simply because I didn't realise all the implications when we began the process. We would probably have gotten married and filed for K3 whilst both working on a ship, had we thought about it more fully.

[pax 0]

If we'd known all our options when Ewen was still here last year, we probably would have gotten hitched, sent him home, and filed for a CR-1.

But, honestly, I don't think we can complain much. We did have something of a wait in London, but five months from beginning to end for the K-1 is pretty fair, IMO.

[Mand 1]

Hmmm, we would probably have gone the IR/CR route (Had never heard of it during our K1 process) since Rob was a legal resident of Ireland, but our K1 journey was swift and we were together in Ireland for all of it, except the interview, as Rob had a job interview here in the US.

Other than that, I don't think we would have changed anything really.

Amanda

[Bosco 1]

It has really been a smooth process so far and the adjustment has been great. Knowing what I know now, I sometimes wish I had moved a little quicker with the paperwork instead of worrying so much about the adjustment. However, I also think me dragging my feet is part of what has made us so strong. We had two years plus from meeting to his arrival to discuss potential issues, address cultural differences, and build a really solid foundation.

Michelle (MichelleandCraig) said she thought that it would have been a good idea to wait longer after the visa was issued before leaving..... we waited almost 2 months. Abderrafie had the time to get his finances in order to his satisfaction, to really think about what he wanted to bring, say his goodbyes and mentally adjust to leaving his home. I really think this worked to our advantage. The desire to be together can be so great, but this is major move.

Rebecca

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

This will put me in the minority on this thread, but I would have done nothing differently.

[Lou Lou 1]

I wouldn't have changed much at all. I got my visa in January and moved in April so had plenty of time to sort everything. I could never have moved so quickly after it being issued and as it turned out it was an important time for me to be in the UK. I got my visa and green card easily (for that time) so there wasn't much pain there. I would have probably shipped less of my belongings with me. I think I brought a lot less than some people but it still felt too much and since being in the US I have got rid of another quarter of it. And visits back to the UK. I always have 2 or more per year and lucky enough to be able to afford it. It's very important to me and helps me regroup. 6 years of seperation was tough but if I had to do it again I'd probably choose to do it the same. I guess I'm also in a different mindset as in less than 5 years I will be moving back to the UK or somewhere in Europe so this was never a permanent move...it didn't make it any easier though!

[Fandango 1,439]

To those who said they might've chosen the CR-1 route instead of the K-1...may I ask why?

We have not yet decided which route to pursue :/ and any insight would be greatly appreciated.

[rebeccajo 14]

Hmmm...I'm with AgentSmith. No complaints.

Wish we'd had a nicer breakfast the morning after our wedding. We went to Golden Corral.....bleh!

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

To those who said they might've chosen the CR-1 route instead of the K-1...may I ask why?

We have not yet decided which route to pursue :/ and any insight would be greatly appreciated.

There was a point in time, when I was starting the AOS process and trying to get all her documents done with DMV and SSA, that I thought I would have rather done CR1 and not K1. But not any more. It took a little effort, but what doesn't?

[caviar22 1]

If we would have knkown how LONG the process really was (I had not yet discovered VJ.com!) we would have filed the week after our wedding instead of 6 months later!

[Fandango 1,439]

To those who said they might've chosen the CR-1 route instead of the K-1...may I ask why?

We have not yet decided which route to pursue :/ and any insight would be greatly appreciated.

There was a point in time, when I was starting the AOS process and trying to get all her documents done with DMV and SSA, that I thought I would have rather done CR1 and not K1. But not any more. It took a little effort, but what doesn't?

Not to hijack this thread...but I'm assuming you do the cr1, you don't need AP, AOS, or EAD because it encompasses them all...but it's a longer wait time to get your honey here?