we consider ourselves married in our heart

[patrick & relyn 0]

something has concerned me for a while and its probably nothing to worry about so i would like opinions and experiences of others on this.....

relyn and i consider ourselves married although we are not. we are waiting now for 8 months for her annulment. we pray everyday it will be as we expect in december and then we will be able to begin the k-1 process........

we wear wedding rings and in almost all of our correspondence she is my wife in surname as well. this is including snail mail cards. i feel good about it and have absolutely no regrets and if we have a hassle because of it i wont regret it for a minute

i think they will check of course for any evidence of a marriage between us since we will file k-1. can they deny or barrage us with "rfe" 's because they have a "feeling". or are approvals based on fact?

thank you in advance for any of the visa journey family who answer.

patrick & relyn

[JenT 0]

Yes, they can. If they even get a HINT of the fact that you are married, you will regret it.

Many of us feel the same way, but you need to understand that you are dealing with the reality of the US government here.

I suggest you go back to being boyfriend/girlfriend, fiance/fiancee, and refer to each other as such, until you are together in the US.

Jen

[sunandmoon 450]

at the interview i'd have her say your her fiance and call the ring an engagement ring. no sense in taking a chance of AR which would delay your being together.

[JenT 0]

at the interview i'd have her say your her fiance and call the ring an engagement ring. no sense in taking a chance of AR which would delay your being together.

Definitely. And DO NOT under, any circumstances, send pictures that could be considered to be wedding pictures.....

Jen

[SirLancelot 1]

I'm asking this because I'm ignorant of the cultural norms in the Philipines, so please, don't get defensive. I'm asking for my education.

Is it normal in the philipines for still married couples awaiting annulment to be romantically involved with new partners? It just doesn't sound right to me that your still married SO is using your surname and wearing a symbolic wedding ring you gave her when she's still married to another person. But is this how it's done in the Philipines?

something has concerned me for a while and its probably nothing to worry about so i would like opinions and experiences of others on this.....

relyn and i consider ourselves married although we are not. we are waiting now for 8 months for her annulment. we pray everyday it will be as we expect in december and then we will be able to begin the k-1 process........

we wear wedding rings and in almost all of our correspondence she is my wife in surname as well. this is including snail mail cards. i feel good about it and have absolutely no regrets and if we have a hassle because of it i wont regret it for a minute

i think they will check of course for any evidence of a marriage between us since we will file k-1. can they deny or barrage us with "rfe" 's because they have a "feeling". or are approvals based on fact?

thank you in advance for any of the visa journey family who answer.

patrick & relyn

[patrick & relyn 0]

i was just chatting with relyn in philippines on her lunch break about what i asked on vj. she is shocked that we could be denied if they breath air that suggests we got married and filed k-1. i know we will have to use care when we get to file for our visa.

wouldnt her annulment freshly approved in say december be any proof we are not manilipulating the system.

why would we get the annulment if we were going to try to lie.

i appreciate the comments and advice.......we will definetly not take any chances

thank you jenT and roymcn3rd

[patrick & relyn 0]

I'm asking this because I'm ignorant of the cultural norms in the Philipines, so please, don't get defensive. I'm asking for my education.

Is it normal in the philipines for still married couples awaiting annulment to be romantically involved with new partners? It just doesn't sound right to me that your still married SO is using your surname and wearing a symbolic wedding ring you gave her when she's still married to another person. But is this how it's done in the Philipines?

something has concerned me for a while and its probably nothing to worry about so i would like opinions and experiences of others on this.....

relyn and i consider ourselves married although we are not. we are waiting now for 8 months for her annulment. we pray everyday it will be as we expect in december and then we will be able to begin the k-1 process........

we wear wedding rings and in almost all of our correspondence she is my wife in surname as well. this is including snail mail cards. i feel good about it and have absolutely no regrets and if we have a hassle because of it i wont regret it for a minute

i think they will check of course for any evidence of a marriage between us since we will file k-1. can they deny or barrage us with "rfe" 's because they have a "feeling". or are approvals based on fact?

thank you in advance for any of the visa journey family who answer.

patrick & relyn

i wont get defensive at all......relyn has not seen or heard from him in almost 7 years. even though there is a son involved as well. he has never seen his son in that time. so as far as her being married to him its just not something she considers herself to be anymore. i am right there with her on the annulment. while catholic church (philippines predominent religion) does consider them strictly married relyn on the other hand has a desire for more than an invisible marriage. we have chatted non stop, talked on phone and i have made two trips to be with her in a years time. it will be two years since we met before we can even realistically get married.

youre welcome to comment further. i do appreciate youre questions. for relyn and i it just feels right for us and her family, son and i are very close

[SirLancelot 1]

i wont get defensive at all......relyn has not seen or heard from him in almost 7 years. even though there is a son involved as well. he has never seen his son in that time. so as far as her being married to him its just not something she considers herself to be anymore. i am right there with her on the annulment. while catholic church (philippines predominent religion) does consider them strictly married relyn on the other hand has a desire for more than an invisible marriage. we have chatted non stop, talked on phone and i have made two trips to be with her in a years time. it will be two years since we met before we can even realistically get married.

youre welcome to comment further. i do appreciate youre questions. for relyn and i it just feels right for us and her family, son and i are very close

Ok, given the 7 year absence, I can more fully appreciate your story.

Best of luck on your petition. And I also agree with the suggestions given so far: do NOT give USCIS or the US Consulate in Manila any impression that you two are already legally married. That would only cause complications for you.

I'm sure you can appreciate the reasons as well. There are different applications/petitions for a fiancee and a wife to enter the US. If you are married already, then you need to apply via a different method than the K1 visa. That is why USCIS and the Consulates will critically scrutinize to make sure you're in fact NOT married when applying via the K1 option.

Again, best of luck. Ask all your questions before applying. This forum is a wealth of knowledge.

[Ken_Maria 0]

I'm asking this because I'm ignorant of the cultural norms in the Philipines, so please, don't get defensive. I'm asking for my education.

Is it normal in the philipines for still married couples awaiting annulment to be romantically involved with new partners? It just doesn't sound right to me that your still married SO is using your surname and wearing a symbolic wedding ring you gave her when she's still married to another person. But is this how it's done in the Philipines?

something has concerned me for a while and its probably nothing to worry about so i would like opinions and experiences of others on this.....

relyn and i consider ourselves married although we are not. we are waiting now for 8 months for her annulment. we pray everyday it will be as we expect in december and then we will be able to begin the k-1 process........

we wear wedding rings and in almost all of our correspondence she is my wife in surname as well. this is including snail mail cards. i feel good about it and have absolutely no regrets and if we have a hassle because of it i wont regret it for a minute

i think they will check of course for any evidence of a marriage between us since we will file k-1. can they deny or barrage us with "rfe" 's because they have a "feeling". or are approvals based on fact?

thank you in advance for any of the visa journey family who answer.

patrick & relyn

i wont get defensive at all......relyn has not seen or heard from him in almost 7 years. even though there is a son involved as well. he has never seen his son in that time. so as far as her being married to him its just not something she considers herself to be anymore. i am right there with her on the annulment. while catholic church (philippines predominent religion) does consider them strictly married relyn on the other hand has a desire for more than an invisible marriage. we have chatted non stop, talked on phone and i have made two trips to be with her in a years time. it will be two years since we met before we can even realistically get married.

youre welcome to comment further. i do appreciate youre questions. for relyn and i it just feels right for us and her family, son and i are very close

Patrick, The NBI background clearance and the Annullment from the Census and FSO will be evidence enough tha tyou ar eno tlegally married not matter how you consider yourslef or what nick names you call each ohter in correspondence. The using of your family name to send correspondence to her while strange and probably illegal in the U.S., may cause an RFE unless you explain that in your proof of relationship letter.

For the question of people in the Philippines that are legally married getting involved with someone else, yes it is very common because there is no divorce int he Philippines, just he annullment process through the church which is very expensive (bribes) and lengthy. Filipino couples split all the time and most of the time it is the guy that ups and leaves, not to be heard of again. My fiancee's parents have been separated for 15+ years and both have live-in partners they both consider their spouse. I guess neither have the money to get the annullment.

Patrick, It might be a good idea to stop using ur surname for ur fiancee', however if the proof of relationship items you are going to provide for the K1 is going to include items with your fiancee' using ur surname, it might be a good idea to continue.... it is a hard call to make for us forum readers. Good luck, Payato

[I'm Gone 60]

Can't remember all the details, but earlier this year on here a woman reported here fiancé was denied entry because he said they were married at the POE.