Slavic, Russia /Ukraine area cultural differences.

[baron555 934]

His wife was from Moscow and had her own business and was doing very well. My Alla met up with is Alla in Moscow before his Alla came here. Baron's wife may have been the most fully informed, highly qualified and successful woman to ever leave Russia for her American man.

If there are no hot Russian men in Moscow, then where would she get one?

She was really really torn to leave all she had made for herself in Moscow....just for me......I realize the commitment and sacrafice she made for me all the time.

She had some boyfriends before and one close one but as usual....he would rather drink beer with his buddies than take care of her.

Then when she became foster guardian to the infant child, "No man would come within 1 kilometer of me" were her words.

Of course she could get sex and get taken out to dinner for it but that was not what she sought.

She had turned another good friend onto EM and she found success and upon her insistence, even after the child entered her life, she started anew on EM and I came along.

Very much that fate and luck brought us together. We are best friends and husband and wife and lovers. Who else can speak of these qualities of their relationship with their spouse?

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Oddly enough I found Moscow disappointing in that regard. Not a fan. I hate Moscow in general, though. I mean, I thought, "Hey, big city, it will be like NYC with more attractive/better dressed people than our so-called 'provincial' city to the North," but... nope.

I didn't mean that women who do sign up for international dating sites are unsuccessful professionally, but there are circumstances in their life that have led them to look elsewhere for a life partner. This site is full of people who packed up and moved for a partner they met online. I don't think that it's a situation that makes it a uniquely RUB cultural trait. Some people, like you and Alla, meet accidentally IRL. Some people are specifically looking for someone and sign up for a service.

Business success and personal success are two very different things, and there's a lot of Russian men, especially older ones, who would be threatened by a successful, independent career woman. I have had guys tell me straight up that they would never want to be with a woman who had more money than they did, for example. I don't know the personal circumstances that led to their decision to seek men elsewhere, but if you're limiting yourself to women who are putting it out there that yes, they WANT to move to be with a man, well, you're playing with a stacked deck in terms of finding someone who is willing to make that sacrifice since they've already stated they WILL.

Neither my Alla nor Phil's were really young women. They are mature women and had children, under some slightly different circumstances but still...a woman beyond her 20s with kids is not a hot item on the RUB menu, sorry, but them's the facts. Too much other "low hanging fruit" around. But for the same reason that some women prefer older men (stable, less of a wild card, bad habits already established, etc)I preferred a woman with the maturity children bring and the persepctive they bring and a woman for whom children were very important.

I never used online sites because I was there, I did not need to. You can walk out the door and have to kick beautiful women out of your way! They are like coveys of quail in West Texas! If I did not live there I certainly would have used the sites, I have nothing against them. If one was really interested in marriage then you may as well go to one of those sites where the women want the same thing. I dated a lot of women and a lot of them had no interest in marriage, so if I had been (I was, sort of) then I am just wasting time. OK, I had some time to waste, a lot of people do not.

Clearly, Alla was open to the idea of marriage, though you could not say she was actively "looking". She was just busy trying to keep her family afloat. Do the opportunities I offer to her children affect her decision? Probably. So what? You gotta love someone for something, may as well be for what he offers the family. I do not think anyone would believe that Alla thinks she could not have found a better looking guy, a richer guy than me, a younger guy...it would take her an hour, maybe less. But, as she says, "I do not care about that anyway"

[eekee 182]

Neither my Alla nor Phil's were really young women. They are mature women and had children, under some slightly different circumstances but still...a woman beyond her 20s with kids is not a hot item on the RUB menu, sorry, but them's the facts. Too much other "low hanging fruit" around. But for the same reason that some women prefer older men (stable, less of a wild card, bad habits already established, etc)I preferred a woman with the maturity children bring and the persepctive they bring and a woman for whom children were very important.

I never used online sites because I was there, I did not need to. You can walk out the door and have to kick beautiful women out of your way! They are like coveys of quail in West Texas! If I did not live there I certainly would have used the sites, I have nothing against them. If one was really interested in marriage then you may as well go to one of those sites where the women want the same thing. I dated a lot of women and a lot of them had no interest in marriage, so if I had been (I was, sort of) then I am just wasting time. OK, I had some time to waste, a lot of people do not.

Clearly, Alla was open to the idea of marriage, though you could not say she was actively "looking". She was just busy trying to keep her family afloat. Do the opportunities I offer to her children affect her decision? Probably. So what? You gotta love someone for something, may as well be for what he offers the family. I do not think anyone would believe that Alla thinks she could not have found a better looking guy, a richer guy than me, a younger guy...it would take her an hour, maybe less. But, as she says, "I do not care about that anyway"

That's my point exactly, although I wasn't really referring to your Alla because you guys didn't meet online. An otherwise perfectly wonderful/attractive/vibrant woman is seen as unmarriagable because of age/kids/whatever... leading her to be open to marriage outside her home country. You guys should be thanking RUB men every day for being so closeminded.

[james&olya 1,121]

That's my point exactly, although I wasn't really referring to your Alla because you guys didn't meet online. An otherwise perfectly wonderful/attractive/vibrant woman is seen as unmarriagable because of age/kids/whatever... leading her to be open to marriage outside her home country. You guys should be thanking RUB men every day for being so closeminded.

I DO, I DO!!!!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

She was really really torn to leave all she had made for herself in Moscow....just for me......I realize the commitment and sacrafice she made for me all the time.

She had some boyfriends before and one close one but as usual....he would rather drink beer with his buddies than take care of her.

Then when she became foster guardian to the infant child, "No man would come within 1 kilometer of me" were her words.

Of course she could get sex and get taken out to dinner for it but that was not what she sought.

She had turned another good friend onto EM and she found success and upon her insistence, even after the child entered her life, she started anew on EM and I came along.

Very much that fate and luck brought us together. We are best friends and husband and wife and lovers. Who else can speak of these qualities of their relationship with their spouse?

Exactly. Alla was traveling all over the FSU and former Soviet Bloc countries as an interpreter for foreign businesses. She was asked out to dinner nearly every night while on business, she usually went (Hey, free dinner in a nice cafe) and more often than not the generous man/men offered to boff her brains out in their hotel room. If she mentioned her two boys they "ran like rabbits"

There is no shortage of "wolves" but few men that would hang around after mentioning children. Alla started to talk about her boys about 5 minutes after I met her, I did not run like a rabbit, spent all that evening with her, met her the next morning and spent all that day with her and she nearly fainted over dead when before I headed back I gave her a small gift for each of her boys I picked up. Nothing really. My toes are STILL curled from the kiss she gave me when I went to the subway!

And still, if I do something for the boys it wins me 5000 points with her! Yesterday I worked with Pasha to fix the windsheild washer pump on his car (bad fuse) I showed him how to check the fuses, find the right one, tell that it was burned and how to change it. Worked! Voila! Then I ran up to the auto parts store with him and bought him a new pair of wiper blades! Holy #######, I had to be peeled off the bed again this morning! I am going to start breaking stuff on his car just so I can fix it!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

That's my point exactly, although I wasn't really referring to your Alla because you guys didn't meet online. An otherwise perfectly wonderful/attractive/vibrant woman is seen as unmarriagable because of age/kids/whatever... leading her to be open to marriage outside her home country. You guys should be thanking RUB men every day for being so closeminded.

OMG you think we don't?! The best Russian vodka is whatever Alla's ex drank to give him the "courage" to beat her and the kids. Sorry they had to endure that, but his loss is my gain. OH YEAH! Not only are there more women than men, but nearly half the men take themselves out of the hunt with their incessant drunkeness. I believe FSU women HATE that and I can tell you it is a major HUGE "plus" that I do not drink at all. While some FSU women will drink to excess, maybe more with the young ones, I think most mature women HATE it. Alla was terribly worried Pasha would turn into an alcoholic (Sergey is too much of a geek for that and I say that with all respect)

I was amazed at the number of "older" women in the FSU that are simply drop dead gorgeous. Just amazed. Young girls, oh lots of them look good everywhere, but when they are in their late 30s and 40s and are STILL the hottest woman in the room! OMG!

[baron555 934]

but when they are in their late 30s and 40s and are STILL the hottest woman in the room! OMG!

Yep.....