How is it possilbe?

[VanessaTony 3,567]

According to your timeline you lived together for about a year and were married for about 9 months. She also just AOSed. She already has enough to remove conditions on her own, she does not need to accuse you of anything under VAWA.

Unless she knew That Guy from before she met you, or you have some evidence of fraud, there is nothing you can do. There may be other reasons for her not wanting to divorce immediately - health insurance coverage comes to mind.

She doesn't NEED to but we all know that some immigration lawyers are morons who give wrong advice so she might still try it... it's still a risk so he should still protect himself. We don't know what evidence of relationship they have so we have no idea whether she "has enough". But hopefully she realises she can just ROC on her own and doesn't make problems for the OP (false claims of abuse, trying to claim support under the I-864). Divorces are messing enough without adding immigration worries.

[bucknutt76 0]

Wow just wow this is unbelievable

[Darnell 8,478]

...

Edited March 25, 2012 by Darnell

[VanessaTony 3,567]

Wow just wow this is unbelievable

I am very sorry you are going through with this but it is very serious. You need to file divorce ASAP and file for the restraining order (just in case). I know you probably still love her, you're still hoping, you want to keep this amicable but her "2-3 months to get stuff done" is very very worrying. As is her seeing an immigration lawyer. So PLEASE protect yourself.

I don't want to scare you too much but there are websites out there that will tell you worst case scenarios. People who have had the worst happen... I doubt your case is this serious but you need to know what CAN and HAS happened to others and why it's VERY important to protect yourself.

[ChrisPG 30]

Vanessa/Tony

Unfortunately, you are wrong.

I have dealt with many people who are currently going through this very thing, but I do NOT need to go into this information.

FIrstly Form I-751 states the following:

1) Filing with a request that the joint filing requirement be waived. You may file this petition at any time after you are granted conditional resident status and before you are removed.

2) Submit Evidence of your relationship

3) Submit a copy of your divorce decree.

4) When to file: Filing with a request that the joint filing requirement be waived. You may file this petition at any time after you are granted conditional resident status and before you are removed.

I am sorry, but you are wrong-- they can file at ANY time. READ the instructions.

IT DOES NOT matter how the conditional GC is issued-- visa K1 or CR-1 the conditions are the same and a person as the right to divorce and move on-- as long as they prove their marriage was entered into in good faith.

Edited March 25, 2012 by ChrisPG

[VanessaTony 3,567]

I am sorry, but you are wrong-- they can file at ANY time. READ the instructions.

I'm not wrong. I'm ignoring most of your post because it's useless fluff trying to bolster your position but totally irrelevant to my stance which is: while yes you CAN wait to file ROC you ARE in breach and CAN BE DEPORTED!! so you MUST file ROC as soon as you are divorce to maintain your status and make sure you are protected. I WILL say there's more to this process than a couple of instructions. There are LAWS at play here... specifically the INA.

The INA clearly states the rules. For your viewing pleasure - INA Sec216(b) http://www.uscis.gov/ilink/docView/SLB/HTML/SLB/0-0-0-1/0-0-0-29/0-0-0-4223.html:

(b) Termination of Status if Finding that Qualifying Marriage Improper.-

(1) In general.-In the case of an alien with permanent resident status on a conditional basis under subsection (a), if the Attorney General determines, before the second anniversary of the alien's obtaining the status of lawful admission for permanent residence, that-

(A) the qualifying marriage-

(i) was entered into for the purpose of procuring an alien's admission as an immigrant, or

(ii) has been judicially annulled or terminated, other than through the death of a spouse; or

(B) a fee or other consideration was given (other than a fee or other consideration to an attorney for assistance in preparation of a lawful petition) for the filing of a petition under section 204(a) or 1/ subsection (d) or (p) of section 214 with respect to the alien; the Attorney General shall so notify the parties involved and, subject to paragraph (2), shall terminate the permanent resident status of the alien (or aliens) involved as of the date of the determination.

I have bolded the relevant sections. You try and claim you are an expert (though won't go into details) but claim you have helped many people through this same thing and yet you do NOT know this law? I certainly hope you're not charging people for your poor advice.. especially when said poor advice CAN result in their deportation!

Edited March 25, 2012 by Vanessa&Tony

[Xanax 349]

I am so sorry you are in this situation, it seems you really were/ are trying to do the best thing. If I were you, I would file for divorce, make sure you are not on the hook for any money and cut her out of your life; Try to get on and live a happy life. No good karma can come to someone who treats others like she has treated you.

IF you ever need to chat or vent my inbox is newly emptied

[sulhaq 60]

To the OP:

You are no doubt getting extremely confused by all of the different answers and arguing in this thread.

I will give you a simple answer. You are going through a tough time and already have a lot on your mind, so,

1. If you are on speaking terms, talk to this person and ask her one last time time if she is willing to work it out. If the answer is no...

2. If it appears you won't be able to work it out, then, if I were you, I would file for divorce, IMMEDIATELY, without waiting another hour.

That is all.

Sorry this happened to you. Good luck in life.

Edited March 25, 2012 by sulhaq

[bucknutt76 0]

Thank you everyone for the posts. I wish it were that easy just file for divorce. I know that that is the right thing to do right now and I want to to protect myself but its very difficult because I do love her I didn't go through all of this trouble and spend all of this money for it to end like this. I spoke to her tonight and asked her if this is what she was doing and she said I was unbelievable and she just wanted me out of her life and to continue a new life on here in the U.S. no matter what it was. She said I was only making assumptions just like I always do and that she hadn't admitted to anything so again I am the bad guy. Im very upset right now and just wish this would all go away. I didn't ask for any of this and just want my life back to normal.

[Justine+David 218]

I know it must be very hard to hear all those words from her...but you also have to protect yourself. I would be devastated if David did this to me and I don't know if I could file for divorce right away because of the depression and hope that it may still work out. But we are looking into your situation and are the objective ones. Please, protect yourself. You are not the bad guy here. This was probably planned before you even got married. I am so sorry

[Leatherneck 693]

Thank you everyone for the posts. I wish it were that easy just file for divorce. I know that that is the right thing to do right now and I want to to protect myself but its very difficult because I do love her I didn't go through all of this trouble and spend all of this money for it to end like this. I spoke to her tonight and asked her if this is what she was doing and she said I was unbelievable and she just wanted me out of her life and to continue a new life on here in the U.S. no matter what it was. She said I was only making assumptions just like I always do and that she hadn't admitted to anything so again I am the bad guy. Im very upset right now and just wish this would all go away. I didn't ask for any of this and just want my life back to normal.

You have no idea how much you will have to spend if you do not start to protect yourself and think in terms of the very first law of nature -- self preservation.

I understand you don't want to be where you are emotionally -- but listen to the advice you're getting here. You now have to start thinking defense and strategy, you never thought your wife would pull a move like she has already -- did you? No you didn't, you trusted her. If someone had warned you a year ago this would happen, you would have thought they were crazy. Well, consider us crazy! We're now trying to tell you what can happen -- and what has happened to many.

She tells me that it will take 2-3 months for her to do what she needs to do to be able to stay but she cant sign divorce papers during that time and doesn't want me to file for it. Can anyone please tell me what she is planning to do and how this lawyer could make it to where she could stay.

You better believe someone has your wife's ear -- and they're putting ideas in her head. Why else would she go off and stay with another man? Loyal, committed wives don't meet other men and stay with them for 4 days. There are only 2 ways your wife can adjust her status and remain here, a successful self-petition after divorce or the ole' nasty sucker punch -- VAWA with a dreaded domestic violence accusation. Self petitioning would be a challenge unless you provide her with all the documents she needs. A successful VAWA is a long shot also -- don't give her that option. You want to avoid being thrown into the dv meat-grinder and spit out a very damaged guy. Take the advice given to you earlier in this thread. Good luck.

Edited March 25, 2012 by Leatherneck

[Shoot Em Straight 385]

Great advice from Vanessa and Tony!!! Wow it was empowering to read he had a chance to help himself...

@ Leatherneck once again well put. OP got great free advice!!! This would have cost so much to get out of an attorney. And to be proactive would be the best option...

BUT his last post #24 is indicating something...he is not ready to let go and think with his head. He wants to remain in this situation.

"I didn't ask for any of this and just want my life back to normal."

I hope it will all work out for the both of them.

[Darnell 8,478]

Thank you everyone for the posts. I wish it were that easy just file for divorce. I know that that is the right thing to do right now and I want to to protect myself but its very difficult because I do love her I didn't go through all of this trouble and spend all of this money for it to end like this. I spoke to her tonight and asked her if this is what she was doing and she said I was unbelievable and she just wanted me out of her life and to continue a new life on here in the U.S. no matter what it was. She said I was only making assumptions just like I always do and that she hadn't admitted to anything so again I am the bad guy. Im very upset right now and just wish this would all go away. I didn't ask for any of this and just want my life back to normal.

asked her if this is what she was doing

oh my - you shouldn't have done that.

Now she knows that you know her plans.

So, for the state you live in, there's a standard template for filing a divorce. Get one, today, from your fav online doc source, fill it, file it tomorrow.

Based on this one post - I must say - she has had a plan - and it included you for a small portion of it. She's done with you now - you need to file for divorce on Monday.

[Leatherneck 693]

Great advice from Vanessa and Tony!!! Wow it was empowering to read he had a chance to help himself...

@ Leatherneck once again well put. OP got great free advice!!! This would have cost so much to get out of an attorney. And to be proactive would be the best option...

BUT his last post #24 is indicating something...he is not ready to let go and think with his head. He wants to remain in this situation.

"I didn't ask for any of this and just want my life back to normal."

I hope it will all work out for the both of them.

You're very perceptive, I saw that statement -- you're right, emotionally he is not ready to let go. However, she is ready to move on and has. She even told him so "...she just wanted me out of her life and to continue a new life on here in the U.S. no matter what it was."

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

I am usually telling members from Nigeria to beware the fraudsters because they are life changing in a horrid way. But I will break out of region and tell you this. No matter how true and honest your feelings for her are , at this point she doesn't give a rats buttocks about you, other possibly as a source of wealth to finance her life in the US. If you want to payroll her future here ,possibly in the arms of another , then sit on your buttocks and let her have a month or so to "work on things". She is an master manipulator and your are the mugu ( google that if you don't know it ) You have been taken for a grand scam . If you try to work things out with her because that is where your heart is , she is going to throw some words at you to make you feel bad, feel sorry for her and comply with her needs to set you up even deeper. You need to realize that you are NOT her lover, her life partner You are a stepping stone in her life and she is about to scrape the remains of that chapter off the bottom of her heel like so much dog poo. RUN and make sure you lock the gate between you to protect yourself.