Fiance' was cheating while PREGNANT

[novedsac 355]

Yeah, it does vary by jurisdiction. Here, if she is found in contempt of court, then she's very likely to be assessed collection/court fees as well. My attorney can represent me through the entire thing so I don't have to be present at all.

I went through this once ... a few hundred dollars per month turned into a $6k assessment for the ex ... she's been perfectly punctual since. Funny how some cats learn.

[Kay&Jay 44]

This woman is so hurtless.I feel so bad for him he worked hard to bring you here.

[Caryh 5,206]

Yeah, it does vary by jurisdiction. Here, if she is found in contempt of court, then she's very likely to be assessed collection/court fees as well. My attorney can represent me through the entire thing so I don't have to be present at all.

I went through this once ... a few hundred dollars per month turned into a $6k assessment for the ex ... she's been perfectly punctual since. Funny how some cats learn.

Yep some people seem to get burned really bad when they fail to pay. My state is pretty tough on them to, but I know a guy who has skipped out on paying for years. When ever they catch up to him to start docking his pay, he quits his job and goes to find another one. You would think it would be easier just to be responsible for his kids? I've never missed paying the child support for my kid. I will be glad when it ends shortly though. I've got a pretty high payment and its not just a few hundred per month. Between taxes and child support I end up with well less than half my pay.

[verysadguy 170]

Interesting collection (no pun intended) of new posts. Here is a brief summary to bring everyone up to date in bullet format.

• No payments and luckily zero contacts of any sort from the ex for several months. Not even a text message thank God.
• Attorney says, don't go after the money, let it accrue. It may come in handy some day in court to show she is a deadbeat. Also, I make 10 times more than her monthly so don't let it look like I am trying to punish her when really don't need the money. Yes, she is in contempt of court. Yes, I am considering termination of parental rights.
• Best I could hope for is my state would garnish her wages and collect child support from her monthly at the county level. It's a measly $139 a month, but she says she only makes $88/month in tips (a lie) yet her monthly bus pass is $90??? I swear that's what she put in her court papers. Does anyone on the planet pay more to get to work then what they earn? Really?
• She is still dating for 3 years the same "dude" from her non-profit charitable Catholic support foundation. He is still posting on twitter a jillion things about domestic violence, emotional abuse buddying up to his district attorney, and supporting this gal almost 100%. Mind you this guy is a member of his state's national guard, a kung fu expert, posts pictures of his weapons, and works for his city government (previously working for nuns and now working under a rabbi, not kidding) supporting the LGBT lobby, too!!! My ex is good at her game no?
• Private detective found a relative of my ex who said she was in line to get her US Citizenship in 2 years. That to me alone is indredulous. Completely scammed the system.
• I've sent several Fedex letters in the last year to DHS, ICE, FDNS, and HSI without a single response to my fraud claims and submitted evidence.
• Congressional inquiries from 2 jurisdictions were shut down by VSC for lack of FOIA.

Bottom line? It pays to lie, cheat, and scam if you just want to get to America by falsifying abuse to get a green card. Fact: this woman was happy in my home scamming me up until the day I served her divorce papers and kicked her out with her voluntarily agreeing to return to Vietnam and handing over the baby to the babysitter IN THE AIRPORT. She then disappeared in to the wilds of America, sued me, developed PTSD and depression mysteriously AFTER I kicked her out as a result of my "emotional abuse", and seduced one of her supporters. Man I love America!

The greatest thing alive lives with me though!

Love that kid.

[verysadguy 170]

Two interesting updates

1. A friend of mine in Vietnam from my ex's farming village told me that my ex's favorite aunt, in who's house my ex grew up, had many men she slept with that included the exchange of cash. Take that statement about said auntie as you will, but it might explain part of my ex's moral development or lack thereof.

2. I have a personal twitter account that chronicled a good bit of my ex's nonsense related to lying to me for years, sleeping with her lover while pregnant with my child, picking up on new boyfriend the first day she went to her Catholic rescuers, not paying her child support etc, false accusations of human trafficking etc...well that received a twitter follower from one of the new lover boy's best friends. The funny thing is all those tweets are probably not eye opening, because I'm sure my ex has lied and charmed her new supporters so thoroughly that once again: subjective statements and emotion without facts in VAWA cases far outweigh HARD OBJECTIVE EVIDENCE.

[Jawaree 717]

^{Dude move on , but you are entitled to child support, I would ask the courts to go after her}

^{to collect thru them , set up a college trust for your daughter and have the court direct deposit}

^{payments to the trust although small....Forget that woman she'll meet her match soon}

[verysadguy 170]

^{Dude move on , but you are entitled to child support, I would ask the courts to go after her}

^{to collect thru them , set up a college trust for your daughter and have the court direct deposit}

^{payments to the trust although small....Forget that woman she'll meet her match soon}

Good points. Just really ticked at the lack of justice. Trust fund already set up. I put $1000 a month away tax free in a 529 fund. Her investment results are far better than mine! The kid is already worth $50k, and she isn't even 4 years old yet. All my assets are in trust, too, so if loverboy bumps me off the ex won't have access to her kid's estate.

No joke this morning at dawn, first words of the day...

Kid: "Daddy!"

Dad: "Yes honey?"

Kid: "I love you"

'nuff said...

[NancyNguyen 1,657]

Good points. Just really ticked at the lack of justice. Trust fund already set up. I put $1000 a month away tax free in a 529 fund. Her investment results are far better than mine! The kid is already worth $50k, and she isn't even 4 years old yet. All my assets are in trust, too, so if loverboy bumps me off the ex won't have access to her kid's estate.

No joke this morning at dawn, first words of the day...

Kid: "Daddy!"

Dad: "Yes honey?"

Kid: "I love you"

'nuff said...

Yes, nothing is more than a child. By the way, your profile pictures is disturbing somehow.

[verysadguy 170]

Yes, nothing is more than a child. By the way, your profile pictures is disturbing somehow.

Disturbing or thought provoking. I believe the legal terms to ponder are

semper necessitas probandi incumbit ei qui agit, the best translation of which seems to be: "the necessity of proof always lies with the person who lays charges"

I found this picture of someone when she was 6 months pregnant with what appears to be a lover, corroborated by the meta data of the photo and associated emails. Whether or not that is my ex I won't disclose on VJ for legal purposes and have "whited out" facial details.

For further edification is this link to wikipedia anyways, especially for others who read my posts on VJ who are also fighting immigration fraud and email me for advice.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_burden_of_proof

In my opinion a photo like this is: BEYOND REASONABLE DOUBT for proving romance fraud leading to immigration fraud.

[verysadguy 170]

Well, now the "egg donor" is a no show for Xmas this year. Not even a "thanks for the opportunity but I just can't make it."

And 17 months without a penny towards child support.

I wonder what is going on at FDNS.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Disturbing or thought provoking. I believe the legal terms to ponder are

semper necessitas probandi incumbit ei qui agit, the best translation of which seems to be: "the necessity of proof always lies with the person who lays charges"

I found this picture of someone when she was 6 months pregnant with what appears to be a lover, corroborated by the meta data of the photo and associated emails. Whether or not that is my ex I won't disclose on VJ for legal purposes and have "whited out" facial details.

For further edification is this link to wikipedia anyways, especially for others who read my posts on VJ who are also fighting immigration fraud and email me for advice.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_burden_of_proof

In my opinion a photo like this is: BEYOND REASONABLE DOUBT for proving romance fraud leading to immigration fraud.

Dude, bad idea to post a picture without permission of someone who can be identified, and couple it with information that insinuates it is your ex and her supposed lover. You are trying to weasel around this by saying "whether or not that is my ex," but that really wouldn't hack it if either one of those people somehow found this post and your avatar together. You could be looking at a libel claim. Just a bit of advice. You gain zero by having it up, and could be evidence of unclean hands should you get to the point of litigation. Really uncool. Save your "proof" for legal proceedings.

Believe it or not, I'm saying this for your own protection.

[verysadguy 170]

Dude, bad idea to post a picture without permission of someone who can be identified, and couple it with information that insinuates it is your ex and her supposed lover. You are trying to weasel around this by saying "whether or not that is my ex," but that really wouldn't hack it if either one of those people somehow found this post and your avatar together. You could be looking at a libel claim. Just a bit of advice. You gain zero by having it up, and could be evidence of unclean hands should you get to the point of litigation. Really uncool. Save your "proof" for legal proceedings.

Believe it or not, I'm saying this for your own protection.

Libel? It is not libel if it's the truth. However, I agree it is an ugly course of action so I took it down. Are you an attorney?

Ultimately, I keep coming back to VAWA fraud in my mind. Romance fraud for immigration purposes. Cut and dried 100%. However, VAWA "rules" negate almost all evidentiary standards. One simply has to prove bona fide marriage, good moral character (simply no criminal convictions), comingling of finances, and some trumped up allegations of abuse. Pretty damn easy. 10,000 relatively easy green cards a year. Some will argue it isn't easy but long and painstaking. Do you think that seems hard to anyone from Nigeria, Russia, Vietnam etc? I don't. These people are laughing at the USA.

Again, for the truly abused I feel for you. For the frauds the "administrative process" is nothing but a little hurdle. I'd love to see the social statistics of post-VAWA awardees.

Please put yourself in my shoes out over $100,000, raising a child by myself, and knowing the mother cannot effectively parent with her mental condition. It is damn scary man.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

Libel? It is not libel if it's the truth. However, I agree it is an ugly course of action so I took it down. Are you an attorney?

Ultimately, I keep coming back to VAWA fraud in my mind. Romance fraud for immigration purposes. Cut and dried 100%. However, VAWA "rules" negate almost all evidentiary standards. One simply has to prove bona fide marriage, good moral character (simply no criminal convictions), comingling of finances, and some trumped up allegations of abuse. Pretty damn easy. 10,000 relatively easy green cards a year. Some will argue it isn't easy but long and painstaking. Do you think that seems hard to anyone from Nigeria, Russia, Vietnam etc? I don't. These people are laughing at the USA.

Again, for the truly abused I feel for you. For the frauds the "administrative process" is nothing but a little hurdle. I'd love to see the social statistics of post-VAWA awardees.

Please put yourself in my shoes out over $100,000, raising a child by myself, and knowing the mother cannot effectively parent with her mental condition. It is damn scary man.

I am not your lawyer, but I am a lawyer. This is some friendly advice I'm giving you in my personal capacity, and meant with the best of intentions. Posting pictures of others on a publicly-accessed message board coupled with insinuations that it is evidence of cheating is not a road I'd personally go down. This is best saved for your attorney.

[rlogan 2,036]

Please put yourself in my shoes out over $100,000, raising a child by myself, and knowing the mother cannot effectively parent with her mental condition. It is damn scary man.

Yeah, it is daunting. We have both parents working together and it is easy to have kids when both are working as a team.

It means everything to us - not just staying together but being a team. The whole family. Sorry to hear but you just pick up the pieces and do the best you can. Funny there is another thread on VJ about someone on welfare for 12 years, and in that thread corporate gangster welfare is brought up too. Lots of unfair going down.

This is one of the reasons for coaching people that it isn't worth trying to fight a false VAWA. It is a bad law, but the psychic energy wasted over trying to stop even brazen acts of immigration fraud isn't worth it. Look how they are just letting in five millions who immigrated illegally. Anchor babies. I remember when people were ridiculed for using the term anchor baby and here it has proven out. After you immigrate illegally, just make sure you have a baby you can't support right away so you can use the baby to get yourself a green card.

Hey, it's the new America.

[AC1022 27]

It's really not my business, or anybody's else for that matter, but the first time I saw this thread was before I even applied for my 2 year conditional GC and yet today it is still ongoing.. VerySadGuy you made your point, yes she is a horrible cheater, liar or "Sociopath" but your non stop venting really start to drain out my sympathy on you.

Sorry! I'm sure none of this is something you or other folks would like to hear, just saying there are people out there who have family members or beloved ones being killed, or people being thrown in jail for decades for something they did not do.. you experienced the evil but you need to move on. This thread lost its original point - how much "I feel sorry for you" or "you are the good guy here" you need to hear from online strangers so that you can stop being obsessed with her? I don't know.