LARGE AGE GAPS, PRIOR MARRIAGES NEED NOT APPLY

[TimeTravel 78]

The article you posted is interesting but the ex-CO who wrote it seems to be completely convinced that he would never make a mistake, and that petitions re-affirmed by USCIS were always fraud cases. I'm pretty sure COs can be wrong sometimes... especially when they refused to look at the evidence the applicant wanted to show and based their decision on who knows what (China, Nigeria, Ecuador, DR...).

+1 Well said!

[sachinky 465]

I think most males are pretty clear what the deal is if they import a younger spouse that would not otherwise give them the time of day.

I just wonder if the issue here is that women have different expectations?

Bingo. This is exactly what I said to my husband last night.

[Brother Hesekiel 2,236]

Dumb/Dumber,

not all marriages of a 21 year-old man from the Middle East to a 50 year-old woman from the U.S. are fraudulent, but 98 or 99 out 99 out of 100 are. Thus, it's up to you to show that your marriage is the exception that stands out.

Move to Morocco; live with your husband for a couple of years, let him proudly show you around and introduce you to his friends and family, and then let him apply for an IR-1 visa with you present at the interview. It's really that easy.

My guess is that about 2 months after moving there you'll be back and will course the day Mohamed rode his camel into town. You'll warn everybody on JV not to trust somebody "like that" and will be so disillusioned and heartbroken, that you will consider stepping in front of a train.

I so hope that I am wrong, and that all of us are wrong, and that you will prove all of us, including the C.O. in Morocco, wrong.

Go for it!

[together4evr 360]

She has already lived with him in Turkey for a couple months. They have been together a long time.

[Laure&Colin 558]

My guess is that about 2 months after moving there you'll be back and will course the day Mohamed rode his camel into town.

While you might be right, I think this sentence is extremely offensive...

Plus OP's husband is Turkish. FYI people don't ride camels in Turkey and Mohamed is not a Turkish name.

[Boiler 45,832]

Then it would help if the op had shared this info in her profile.

The truth is extremely offensive?

Be prepared to lead your life being offended.

[Dumb/Dumber 61]

I also feel that the Department of State should be honest on their webiste and list the red flags that they feel will stop a couple from getting a visa. Then we wouldn't waste our time or money. My husband and I have an age difference, I am Black and he is Asian and we got married very quickly. Also he is Muslim and I am Christian. From what I understand all of these things could be considered red flags. When I married my husband I had no idea what red flags were. I learned them later on VJ.

My husband is in AP and has been for almost 15 months. He's had 2 interviews and they did a field investigation on him. We are at the point where we just want an answer. Either they will give us the visa or they won't.

I surely understand that. My husband and I have been marrıed sınce October 2010 and probably another year before 2nd ıntervıew. So crazy to put our lıves on hold lıke thıs.

[Dumb/Dumber 61]

I really want to recommend this article on marriage fraud:

http://cis.org/marriagefraud

It's written by a former CO, and gives tons of insight into what they face, how they think, and really helps in how to best be prepared to meet them.

Thank you so much for thıs artıcle. Thıs ıs awesome ınformatıon. I very much apprecıate ıt.

[Dumb/Dumber 61]

Dumb/Dumber,

not all marriages of a 21 year-old man from the Middle East to a 50 year-old woman from the U.S. are fraudulent, but 98 or 99 out 99 out of 100 are. Thus, it's up to you to show that your marriage is the exception that stands out.

Move to Morocco; live with your husband for a couple of years, let him proudly show you around and introduce you to his friends and family, and then let him apply for an IR-1 visa with you present at the interview. It's really that easy.

My guess is that about 2 months after moving there you'll be back and will course the day Mohamed rode his camel into town. You'll warn everybody on JV not to trust somebody "like that" and will be so disillusioned and heartbroken, that you will consider stepping in front of a train.

I so hope that I am wrong, and that all of us are wrong, and that you will prove all of us, including the C.O. in Morocco, wrong.

Go for it!

Apprecıate the response and I do belıeve that I would not last two days ın Morocco. My husband ıs from Turkey. Thıs ıs my thırd vısıt to Turkey and I love beıng wıth my wonderful husband and hıs famıly, but I have a great famıly, own my own home, and I have a great job ın Amerıca so I am beıng selfısh and I want my husband to move to Amerıca and leave hıs home and famıly for me. I am wıth hım now and he would love for me to stay wıth hım here ın Turkey, but I am goıng back home and fıght for a second ıntervıew so we can start our lıves together ın Amerıca.

[Dumb/Dumber 61]

A woman meets a person and falls in love and wishes to live together

She, an American citizen has the right to petition for her SO to come live with her here. It is too easy to write "if you think you will have problems dont start the process"

I believe OP started out with the K1 before this Denial of the Spousal Visa...without hindsight and VJ..how does one think they will have problems with the process???

Even now armed with knowledge of what to expect.. she is still fighting to this day when she boards her plane to Turkey in order to see her husband.

OP went through it all... Be it a VERY LARGE age gap or not dont see that was the jist of her post ...

I believe she was asking after all these fees paid, time waited, due diligence in attempting to show it IS a Bona Fide Relationship...with same results

WHY are they still taking the fees as if she has a chance...I too see this with our MENA forum with other ladies on here,after all that they have offered in proof and fight,emails, calls, requests to Senators to step in etc...One is left absolutely shocked,dumbfounded feeling helpless.

Living here or there is not important, you are right on with this, just as long as we are together with our partner! This is wonderful way of thinking and I too share this conclusion in my Journey...but the embassy in the country your SO is going through has quite a different idea of "age difference". You are very blessed with this.

It is not you that I post against...it is the irony of some cases. I wish you good luck

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Thank you for your response. We never fıled for K-1 only K-3 whıch they changed to CR1. Denıed fırst ıntervıew.

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

First, it is important to take into account "Cultural Norms" for the Alien Spouse as in many countries these "Norms" are something children are indoctrinated into and breaking them is a very big deal. From historical data is does seem that more often than not when a young MENA Man breaks the a "Cultural Norm" by marrying a woman twice his age then it is for the "acceptable purpose of immigration to the US" so it is legitimate for DOS/USCIS and the Embassy staff to assume this is the case.

Second, why do they let you apply anyway? Well that's pretty simple, they are giving you the opportunity to prove that your marriage is one of those in the minority and your MENA husband deserves an Immigrant Visa. There are reports on VJ of couple where the woman was much older than her MENA husband, divorced (some even more than once) and they are now living together in the US.

I'm not going to pass judgement on your case, nobody here should, but I will remind you to read how many threads there are in the MENA section of women complaining about how they were so sure of the reality of their marriage. How hard they fought to get him here and then how quickly things changed when that Greencard arrived in the mail.

It's like the middle-aged "Kano" male euphoric about bringing his teen fiance from China, Thailand, Philippines etc and then once she gets here he complains that he's raising a child. Again there are a lot of success stories from this region but it's also rife with hidden agendas (on both sides) and faulty expectations (again on both sides).

Enter these situations with realistic expectations on both sides and understand what you'll be dealing with for the immigration process, it's the best you can do.

Edited March 12, 2012 by Bob 4 Anna

[Laure&Colin 558]

Then it would help if the op had shared this info in her profile.

The truth is extremely offensive?

Be prepared to lead your life being offended.

The truth is not offensive, but picturing MENA men as riding camels and being called Mohamed? Yes.

[Dumb/Dumber 61]

First, it is important to take into account "Cultural Norms" for the Alien Spouse as in many countries these "Norms" are something children are indoctrinated into and breaking them is a very big deal. From historical data is does seem that more often than not when a young MENA Man breaks the a "Cultural Norm" by marrying a woman twice his age then it is for the "acceptable purpose of immigration to the US" so it is legitimate for DOS/USCIS and the Embassy staff to assume this is the case.

Second, why do they let you apply anyway? Well that's pretty simple, they are giving you the opportunity to prove that your marriage is one of those in the minority and your MENA husband deserves an Immigrant Visa. There are reports on VJ of couple where the woman was much older than her MENA husband, divorced (some even more than once) and they are now living together in the US.

I'm not going to pass judgement on your case, nobody here should, but I will remind you to read how many threads there are in the MENA section of women complaining about how they were so sure of the reality of their marriage. How hard they fought to get him here and then how quickly things changed when that Greencard arrived in the mail.

It's like the middle-aged "Kano" male euphoric about bringing his teen fiance from China, Thailand, Philippines etc and then once she gets here he complains that he's raising a child. Again there are a lot of success stories from this region but it's also rife with hidden agendas (on both sides) and faulty expectations (again on both sides).

Enter these situations with realistic expectations on both sides and understand what you'll be dealing with for the immigration process, it's the best you can do.

Thıs ıs very well saıd and I totally agree, but can you really trust Amerıcan men? Marrıages begın and end ın days, weeks or months ın Amerıca as well because people thınk they are ready or one ıs only usıng the other. I belıeve that ıt ıs very hard for anyone to know for sure ıf a marrıage ın bonafıde or not. If there ıs evıdence a marrıage ıs not bonafıde, then deny the vısa and share evıdence ımmedıately wıth the Amerıcan petıoner.

[Shoot Em Straight 385]

Dumb/Dumber,

not all marriages of a 21 year-old man from the Middle East to a 50 year-old woman from the U.S. are fraudulent, but 98 or 99 out 99 out of 100 are. Thus, it's up to you to show that your marriage is the exception that stands out.

Move to Morocco; live with your husband for a couple of years, let him proudly show you around and introduce you to his friends and family, and then let him apply for an IR-1 visa with you present at the interview. It's really that easy.

My guess is that about 2 months after moving there you'll be back and will course the day Mohamed rode his camel into town. You'll warn everybody on JV not to trust somebody "like that" and will be so disillusioned and heartbroken, that you will consider stepping in front of a train.

I so hope that I am wrong, and that all of us are wrong, and that you will prove all of us, including the C.O. in Morocco, wrong.

Go for it!

You had such decent advice...why put an ugly twist on this post. Yes it is offensive, prejudicial, unnecessary. yes I agree with Laure&Colin not good!!!

[Deputy Purple 1,294]

This ıs very well saıd and I totally agree, but can you really trust Amerıcan men? Marrıages begın and end ın days, weeks or months ın Amerıca as well because people thınk they are ready or one ıs only usıng the other. I believe that ıt ıs very hard for anyone to know for sure ıf a marrıage ın bonafıde or not. If there ıs evıdence a marrıage ıs not bonafıde, then deny the vısa and share evıdence ımmedıately wıth the Amerıcan petitioner.

Very true but when the romance/marriage is international and one party wants to immigrate to the other's home country then that Government has a right to decide if "it" believes the marriage is just for one party to gain immigration benefits.

Part of the problem with sharing the evidence with the Petitioner is that they can be "in on it" or simply niave and refuse to believe it then pass the info along to a scammer who can figure out how to overcome it.