LARGE AGE GAPS, PRIOR MARRIAGES NEED NOT APPLY

[Boiler 45,813]

I guess the question is whether the issue would have arisen without the allure of a US Green Card.

In the vast majority of cases referred to here you would have to say no.

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

For proof of that just read the application forms that ask about being part of the Nazi party. I find that very offensive given how old someone would have to be, yet our wonderful government has not see fit to revisise these forms and remove that. Why? I wonder how long it will be before they remove this reference.

Dave

They're not all dead so the question is still pertinent, for a very few.

[thelastpetitioner 218]

I see so many posts on here about prior marriages and large age gaps especially between older women and younger men being a BIG RED FLAG!!

My question is why does the United States let us apply and pay fees if this is a reason to deny?

I am thinking because it can not be the reason to deny. They have to just say you are lying about having a bona fide marriage after you pay all these fees and go through all the stress and waiting time.

Something is just not right with this process. CO's need to be retrained. This is not 1955. This is 2012. People get divorces. Young men marry older women. Blacks marry whites. Men marry men. People meet online and marry quickly.

Yes there are a lot of fraud cases out there. But take out the above factors and train these CO's to find the real fraud cases instead of bogging down the system with couples who have to be reaffirmed and interviewed two and three times because they are not the same age, same religion, same color.

Real fraud reasons folks: Do we know what those are?

I'm from a third world country and I can say this without prejudice, this might not be 1955 but there some countries out there who live in the same condition Americans back in 1955 did.the cultural difference between states and middle east/Africa is so huge, they can't get into the details of every case. They are told generally as a rule older women with history of prior marriages marrying younger men is a red flag, it's not common and the possibility of it being a fraud is high.they go by the standard.to them everyone is committing fraud unless you prove otherwise, and you know what, it all makes sense to me know, and I'm sure as soon as you get your partner here and prepare for the next step of immigration it will to you too

[thelastpetitioner 218]

Now* damn apple auto correct

[thelastpetitioner 218]

Hear Hear!! Totally agree with the above. And I also find it difficult to buy into the whole "not culturally normal" attitude. I get it, believe me. But I'm not trying to immigrate to my fiance's country, he's trying to immigrate to the US and cultures are different here. So why does our relationship have to follow what's culturally normal in his home country? I understand that family plays a part in every relationship, but we're not living with the family and if our families are in agreement anyways, why would couples be denied or at least be put into AP based on "not culturally normal"? Just my opinion.

Because your partner was not born and raised in the states. Cultural difference is no something that everyone can handle or fix,only the strong survive

[dustingthestars 9]

It's all about what the IO implies about your relationship and what you infer from that.

There is no doubting that spouses and fiances/fiancees from the MENA region, South America and the Indian region (examples) get treated, by comparison, very differently from the spouses and fiances/fiancees from Europe, Canada and Australia (examples) and that's not likely to change. If a lot of fraud is found to come from that region then you can understand why the Consulates in those regions become jaded and find excuses to refuse visas rather than find reasons to approve a visa.

In order to find reasons to refuse they will use observations such as age difference, cultural difference et al. A lot of the time the refusal is for a bona-fide reason though. This website sees a lot of refusal traffic so it appears a lot, but I doubt that a lot of the refusals are actually unfair or unjust, in the scheme of things.

[TimeTravel 78]

I see so many posts on here about prior marriages and large age gaps especially between older women and younger men being a BIG RED FLAG!!

My question is why does the United States let us apply and pay fees if this is a reason to deny?

I am thinking because it can not be the reason to deny. They have to just say you are lying about having a bona fide marriage after you pay all these fees and go through all the stress and waiting time.

Age gap ( older women/younger men ) is considered as red flag, but that can't be the prime reason to deny anyone's application. If someone has big red flag, then they need to bring big green flag to overcome the issue. CO has 10-15 min to know the person/make the decision at the time of interview. If one is failed to show the strong evidences of relationship, then CO may have hard time to decide.

Please note, On VJ, there are some cases where people had successful result after all these red flag. Every case is unique, and its outcome depend up to applicant and the evidences that they provide.

The bottom line is that, if US Consulate has any problem to issue the visa or whatever, but petitioner has choice to move to beneficial country, and spend couple of years there together, know more about each other in person, then re-apply.

I know it is not that easy, but it is important to bring the green flag in such circumstances.

Edited March 10, 2012 by iwaiting

[sachinky 465]

Hear Hear!! Totally agree with the above. And I also find it difficult to buy into the whole "not culturally normal" attitude. I get it, believe me. But I'm not trying to immigrate to my fiance's country, he's trying to immigrate to the US and cultures are different here. So why does our relationship have to follow what's culturally normal in his home country? I understand that family plays a part in every relationship, but we're not living with the family and if our families are in agreement anyways, why would couples be denied or at least be put into AP based on "not culturally normal"? Just my opinion.

Because chances are, without the green-card "sweetening the deal," -- so to speak -- the beneficiary would not be engaged to someone who looks like his grandmother, in all likelihood. I think the important question here is, if you take out the immigration factor, does this relationship still make sense?

I am going to quote JimVaPhuong here because he put it much more elegantly in another thread. The sentence in bold hits the nail on the head.

Age doesn't matter at some consulates, but it's a very big deal at some others. It depends very much on what would be considered socially acceptable in the beneficiary's country. In many cultures the primary purpose of marriage is to produce a family. In those cultures it would be unusual for a woman to enter a marriage if she was nearing the end of her child bearing years.

Also, in some cultures it's considered unusual for someone to marry outside of their race, religion, or social group. The couple might be subjected to persecution or ridicule.

Neither one of these is proof positive that the relationship is a sham, but they do cause a consular officer to wonder if the relationship would exist if immigration was not a factor. Would the beneficiary be as willing to break those cultural taboos if they were going to continue to live in that country? A consular officer ... would usually conclude that they would not, and they'd deny the visa.

Edited March 10, 2012 by sachinky

[Nemo13 1]

D/D,

I agreed with your original post! There is definitely bias in the immigration process. Me and my husband have two areas on the so-called red flag list: Divorce / new marriage dates close, and we are different races. The result: we are still waiting for a NOA2 going on 14 months. We know our relationship is true, and we are praying each day.

When I hear cases on here when some poor USC has suffered fraud I get so angry because how can the fraudsters get through but me and my husband kept apart because of a bias system.

[sachinky 465]

D/D,

I agreed with your original post! There is definitely bias in the immigration process. Me and my husband have two areas on the so-called red flag list: Divorce / new marriage dates close, and we are different races. The result: we are still waiting for a NOA2 going on 14 months. We know our relationship is true, and we are praying each day.

When I hear cases on here when some poor USC has suffered fraud I get so angry because how can the fraudsters get through but me and my husband kept apart because of a bias system.

Looks like the petitioner was interviewed twice already. This does not seem to be a normal case. NOA2s shouldn't take 14 months. There's more to this story. Is your husband of French origin?

[Nemo13 1]

There is nothing more to the story.

Edited March 10, 2012 by Nemo13

[AmyWrites 593]

Actually, CO's are well trained. That's exactly why in some consulates this is a big red flag... because in some consulates this is a big indicator for fraud, because most people don't want to marry an older person in general, add to that other cultural factors, etc. In other consulates, it's different factors. It's up to us to prove that our relationships are real.

[Boiler 45,813]

Then it sounds more like a screw up, which happen.

[NY_BX 397]

I see so many posts on here about prior marriages and large age gaps especially between older women and younger men being a BIG RED FLAG!!

My question is why does the United States let us apply and pay fees if this is a reason to deny?

I am thinking because it can not be the reason to deny. They have to just say you are lying about having a bona fide marriage after you pay all these fees and go through all the stress and waiting time.

Something is just not right with this process. CO's need to be retrained. This is not 1955. This is 2012. People get divorces. Young men marry older women. Blacks marry whites. Men marry men. People meet online and marry quickly.

Yes there are a lot of fraud cases out there. But take out the above factors and train these CO's to find the real fraud cases instead of bogging down the system with couples who have to be reaffirmed and interviewed two and three times because they are not the same age, same religion, same color.

Real fraud reasons folks: Do we know what those are?

In theory- and even 'morally'- I agree with you. In reality, I do not. Is the process fair? No. But it is in place for a reason.

If we fall in love and file a petition we'd probably forget to be objective and look at this with a practical point of view. We overlook certain things CO's are trained to catch. Frankly, I rather a CO 'break my relationship' due to a scammer being caught, than a man 'break my heart and bank account' due to falling prey of his scam while still be under my affidavit of support. I personally know a man that scammed an older lady; the stereotype you mention. He is under her affidavit even after abandoning her and finally granting divorce (he wanted to wait until ROC). He works and dates as he pleases, and yes, he is looking to marry someone younger.

It happens. Unfortunately.

[Pinoylover 6]

The way i look at it if you think you will have problems then don't start the process at all! Everything happens for a reason! that i know for sure weather good or bad and yes it would really suck to go threw all the motions waiting time,pay all the fee's then get to the interview and get denied that would piss me off in a way well you know what i mean. I know there are a lot of wrong ways that they do this and should do it a certain way and not judge people because an older woman in love with a young buck and so on but it happens that way! I just put my trust in the lord and whatever happens happens. I'm going to be with mine weather it's here or there no matter what it takes. God Bless

Edited March 10, 2012 by Pinoylover