March 2012 AOS filers

[Arce0426 3]

My wife thinks I'm over-reacting but the IO was a complete dbag. Undermined all the evidence I presented. Raised a stink about online dating, online communications,or any conversations that were not vis a vis, talked down on me, my wife etc. I was in there for 2 hours! We were not separated either. So I do not know. Maybe if I get in the mood (after an actual decision) I may expound on it. Still seething mad. Here's some quick advice. Make sure any photos you have, have family of either side in them. Pre-marital counseling is good if you're in the Bible belt. Work on affidavits especially from your spouse's closest relatives. If they are clergy or you know any, even better. If you are an inter-racial couple, expect more probing about your commonalities or differences. It will be subtle but glaring. They will not mention race at all. How long you dated before marrying, get all your dates straight (know roughly when all the major events occurred to the month - basically, get your timeline right. Most importantly, if you have lived apart or do not have a common residence at the time of interview, make sure the other bonafides are solid. Get life/health insurance and a bank account (not optional.) Just in case you filed when you were under removal (I wasn't) I can not even imagine what you would go through if you got an IO like mine. The ONLY thing he liked was my I-864 (ironically, the only thing I was RFE'd for.) I just have the feeling this will be a denial. He was very hard on me about not having our own apt (note, I haven't been working for 1 month yet and my wife is unemployed.) He raised a big stink about that. I would also advise anyone NOT to rely strongly on e-chats, emails, web-chats, skype, whatever, anything electronic (signed, endorsed etc) if your IO is an older person. Just put that evidence at the bottom of the pile and don't use it. It will work against you. If you graduated, and then became out of status, do not take the school transcript with you. I do not want any of you guys to go through what I went through. Practice and rehearse responses to these questions. "What attracted him/her to you? What do you have in common?" If you have any weaknesses in your presented evidence, that is what will be focussed on so have good answers and expect to be grilled on them. This #### grilled me for about 10 minutes about bad grades I had during ONE semester over 10 years ago! Gotta go to work. Later.

Gotta run to work.

mikex im so sorry about your interview.. ive been so close to this website since the beginning of my AOS process that it really upset me that u had such a hard interview..we all deserve the best and we have put enough effort on our part to be successful.. dont worry and i agree worst case they will schedule u again or rfe u for more evidence.. cheer up best of luck buddy :)

[jdh 103]

Get your landlord to write a letter for you two affirming you both reside there

What she said.

And if you have records from when he was on your insurance, you may be able to use that and explain that the new company doesn't have open enrollment till August...it shows that you did have intent of having him insured under you.

Call your companies that bill you and ask if they will add a second name - if they won't, no biggy - mine wouldn't either. The idea is to have as many as these self-substantiating evidences as possible. Things that say clearly, "Our lives are intertwined in every area from social (pictures with friends and family/affidavits) to financial (bills, accounts and leases) and residential (lease/letter from landlord)."

Your joint bank accounts are good evidence as well.

Edited June 2, 2012 by jdh

[AtariBaby 17]

Sounds brutal, Mike, I can't imagine how you must feel right now. My wife was cruelly harassed by the customs officers every time she came and left before we were married, so I have witnessed close hand how that makes a person feel.

I agree, though, be optimistic until you learn otherwise. And even if you are denied, there are remedies. But I understand you're having financial troubles and I hope you get through it quickly.

srarios and others, I don't think you should take this situation and start panicking. There were clearly a lot of circumstances around this incident that were unusual and therefore red flags: not living together, lack of income, etc, plus this particular officer was probably a racist with no oversight. srarios surely if you two have lived together that long you have evidence of co-mingling of your lives and if asked for more pictures just explain about your hard drive. If you have some photos I'm sure that will suffice. I've never read a single report of someone who had photos but not enough photos, so they were denied. Here's a tip: we never take photos, so I asked my relatives to send pics of us together. Ask your friends and family. Plus, if they mail them to you addressed to the two of you, then you have some cards and envelopes to add to your evidence pile.

And it seems most everyone gets approved even after they are harassed or even after they get some questions wrong. We're just all helping each other prepare to the max. Try to relax and be positive. Some get delays, an unlucky few are given a hard time, but almost everyone succeeds.

[ChrisPG 30]

Okay so if I no longer have a lease to our house what to do? Our lease ended 4 years ago? So we have been month to month? Insurance: I cannot add him to mines until after he has his gc! He was on it from oct 2010-November 2011 when they canceled him off because my job switch insurance companies and the new will not take him until open enrollment which is in August! All bills are in my name! We have 2 bank accounts in our name! Any help will we appericated

Call your landlord and ask to see if he still has a copy of your old lease and also ask him to write a letter stating that both you and he have living at the residence from xx-xx-xxxx to xx-xx-xxx

Regarding your utilities, it is probably too late to really add your husband and you likely won't get a new billing statement for the month until after your interview-- but it is still worth doing and if possible, ask them if they can send you a letter documenting such.

Just remember that even though some things are not co-mingled simply having various things go to your combined rental house/place is almost as good, even if they are in different names. For example a water bill in your name and a magazine subscription or gym membership in your husband's name-- but both going to the same place of residence is perfectly acceptable also.

[Arce0426 3]

needless to say we have tonnnnnnnnns of pics together including when we were teenagers when i was 16 and he was 18 and it clearly shows bc since he joined military he physically changed got more buff and stuff and i just look a little older but we are now 22 and 23 yrs old. so i am definantly brining that and my scrapbook from the beginning of our relationship which shows us with both our families and friends not just us alone.

as far as lease goes i initialed and signed it as did my husband.

so we got

-lease

-joint bank acount

-bah (basic allowance for housing) that the military gives us which clearly states me as his spoouse

-scrapbook

-profession wedding photobook from shutterfly from the big wedding

-pictures of the courthouse wedding

-more pics

-hubbys life insurance listing me as beneficiary

-medical insurance contract with our names on it.

-receipts where he bought the enagement ring/wedding ring

-receipt where i bought furniture

-both our birth certificates original and translated

- i-94

- both our passports

-naturalization cert for USC

-marriage liscense certified copy by the courthouse

-taxes/w2s

-all my USCIS notices

-copy of his military orders

-extra wedding invitation with rsvp card.

-pictures from prom night

going to try and get a printout of the DEERS info

cant get any utilities yet

and no car insurance bc i dnt drive yet

what else should i bring i would apreciate any input since my appt is this tuesday thanks :thumbs:

[jdh 103]

And it seems most everyone gets approved even after they are harassed or even after they get some questions wrong. We're just all helping each other prepare to the max. Try to relax and be positive. Some get delays, an unlucky few are given a hard time, but almost everyone succeeds.

That is very true.

I was harassed pretty harshly the last few times I entered the states, and had entered with no problems hundreds of times before living on border towns. I was pretty much interrogated by an officer one time when on my way BACK to Canada after having been previously cleared for entry, done my business in the states and was heading back I decided to stop in and ask for some information on the PROPER way to go about moving if my wife and I ever decided to. He proceeded to grill me for a good half hour and give me all sorts of misinformation and lies that showed his lack of understanding. When he finally said I could leave, I walked out and he came after me and asked me to come back in, took my passport and photocopied it. He flagged my passport and the next few times it was a major hassle getting cleared for entry.

Even with all that hassle, they still cleared me for entry each time. When we entered the last time I showed the guy my bank account, that we had lots of money to support ourselves for a while, I was partially unemployed and didn't have return tickets. He gave me the usual grill...I was straight with him and said we did have plans to return - had left our dog with my family and most of our belongings were there, we were coming with four bags but honestly our lives were in a limbo stage and hadn't decided what to do.

He basically said that he wasn't going to waste time on people he didn't really believe we're going to do anything wrong but to make up our minds and file some kind of paperwork (my wife's visitor status to Canada was expired so we would have had to file something there if we decided to come back).

Long story short, they grill and they are mean sometimes but it doesn't mean you will be denied. Stay strong!

[jdh 103]

needless to say we have tonnnnnnnnns of pics together including when we were teenagers when i was 16 and he was 18 and it clearly shows bc since he joined military he physically changed got more buff and stuff and i just look a little older but we are now 22 and 23 yrs old. so i am definantly brining that and my scrapbook from the beginning of our relationship which shows us with both our families and friends not just us alone.

what else should i bring i would apreciate any input since my appt is this tuesday thanks :thumbs:

Honestly you have a lot of great stuff...I would actually only suggest narrowing your pictures down to a smaller stack...forget all the albums and stuff. Get a small but decent variety of pics assembled that show you with other people and of the ones that are just the two of you be sure to just pick several that clearly show the progression of time in your relationship.

Our IO liked that we did that and kept it simple for him. I think we probably had a stack of around 20-25 photos for him that he could quickly go through and verify our relationship.

[Mike X Man 37]

Well...the thing is, I have a joint bank account (recently opened for obvious reasons, in OK you can't even open one without a state ID...period!), I have a 2011 jointly filed tax returns and I have just applied for an apt (note, application needed two paystubs before submission.) Therefore, I actually applied for an apt as early as I possibly could after working for 2 pay periods and getting paid. Seems logical, right? Not to this #######. Again, I reminded him that I just started working on 5/3/12 right after I got my EAD . My other source of income before then was not reliable. He even acknowledged the difficulty of someone (like me) who does not have recent employment/housing history getting an apartment right away (remember I have no income coming in from the spouse) yet he still gave me (especially) ####### about it about how I was a shitty husband. I wish I could say I was joking but that was his attitude and mindset. Very bellicose. Even though I clearly explained why that stuff was not in order. BTW...I have shared a common residence with my wife (granted not in our own house, he hated that btw) we talk DAILY for hours online or on the phone (he hated that fact too) and just could not see anything beyond it. He kept complaining about why I had not been employed for the past few years and I literally wanted to scream out to him (yeah.....I would be working illegally!!!!) and he just hated that. I was not working because of my status! The fact that the G325A only asked about where I have lived for the past 5 years completely skewed my actual history because I "officially" stopped working illegally in 2009 and till that point, I had lived on my own and had a job CONTINUOUSLY since I was 18....I'm 33 now. There was a period I even had 3 jobs simultaneously! So, his assertions were completely off. I had to sit there and listen to this guy who has known me for 20 ###### minutes lecture me about my life as if he was my dad.

Edited June 2, 2012 by MikeX

[MrsNotBonJovi 18]

Get your landlord to write a letter for you two affirming you both reside there

This is how we did it, the lease document is in husband's name, so I got landlord write a letter stating we both have been living there from the date at start of lease. This should be okay, I guess.

[FinallyDone:) 10]

Well...the thing is, I have a joint bank account (recently opened for obvious reasons, in OK you can't even open one without a state ID...period!), I have a 2011 jointly filed tax returns and I have just applied for an apt (note, application needed two paystubs before submission.) Therefore, I actually applied for an apt as early as I possibly could after working for 2 pay periods and getting paid. Seems logical, right? Not to this #######. Again, I reminded him that I just started working on 5/3/12 right after I got my EAD . My other source of income before then was not reliable. He even acknowledged the difficulty of someone (like me) who does not have recent employment/housing history getting an apartment right away (remember I have no income coming in from the spouse) yet he still gave me (especially) ####### about it about how I was a shitty husband. I wish I could say I was joking but that was his attitude and mindset. Very bellicose. Even though I clearly explained why that stuff was not in order. BTW...I have shared a common residence with my wife (granted not in our own house, he hated that btw) we talk DAILY for hours online or on the phone (he hated that fact too) and just could not see anything beyond it. He kept complaining about why I had not been employed for the past few years and I literally wanted to scream out to him (yeah.....I would be working illegally!!!!) and he just hated that. I was not working because of my status! The fact that the G325A only asked about where I have lived for the past 5 years completely skewed my actual history because I "officially" stopped working illegally in 2009 and till that point, I had lived on my own and had a job CONTINUOUSLY since I was 18....I'm 33 now. There was a period I even had 3 jobs simultaneously! So, his assertions were completely off. I had to sit there and listen to this guy who has known me for 20 ###### minutes lecture me about my life as if he was my dad.

Wow!

[MrsNotBonJovi 18]

What she said.

And if you have records from when he was on your insurance, you may be able to use that and explain that the new company doesn't have open enrollment till August...it shows that you did have intent of having him insured under you.

Call your companies that bill you and ask if they will add a second name - if they won't, no biggy - mine wouldn't either. The idea is to have as many as these self-substantiating evidences as possible. Things that say clearly, "Our lives are intertwined in every area from social (pictures with friends and family/affidavits) to financial (bills, accounts and leases) and residential (lease/letter from landlord)."

Your joint bank accounts are good evidence as well.

I have read cases on this forum where people have been advised against doing this, because having your name added so close to the interview date may raise a red flag, especially since some of these bills are likely to show when the second name was added. You do not want to make it seem like you are adding up evidence just for the interview.

[Mike X Man 37]

Are there any of you couples out there who write each other sweet spontaneous love notes? My wife LOVES doing this. I brought a few and this dude just did not get it at all. He audibly wondered why a couple would write each other letters. I am not kidding! I need some decaff. Anyway, if/when I get the denial, what are the next steps? I want to be ready.

Edited June 2, 2012 by MikeX

[FinallyDone:) 10]

Well we been married 4 years n not gas or light will let me add him on

[DandT14 272]

He kept complaining about why I had not been employed for the past few years and I literally wanted to scream out to him (yeah.....I would be working illegally!!!!) and he just hated that. I was not working because of my status! I had to sit there and listen to this guy who has known me for 20 ###### minutes lecture me about my life as if he was my dad.

Any chance he was trying to rile you up, so you would admit to working illegally? It sounds to me like he was intentionally pushing your buttons.

I'm sorry it was so ugly. I'll bet you still get approved though. Good luck.

[Hypnos 6,578]

I'm sorry to hear about your poor experience Mike. In your position I would document everything your IO said that you felt was not appropriate or pertinent to your case, for use down the line in case you need it. I bet that the guy wouldn't have tried to pull half the ####### he did if there was a lawyer in the room, either.

I still believe you will be approved though, but it may perhaps require another interview. At the end of the day it doesn't matter what the IO suspects, or even that he believes he knows, it only matters what he can prove. In this day and age there are appeals and lawsuits flying back and forth over things exactly such as this, so while perhaps not everything was as he wanted it, I doubt there is enough there to issue a denial.

I am in a similar, although not identical, situation. I also have not worked due to my status; instead my wife was the breadwinner and I was a SAH dad. I fully expect this to be brought up at my interview since it deviates from society's "norms". Older generations (such as those you find in the federal government and its agencies) still see the man working and providing financially for his family with the woman staying at home, keeping a clean house and raising the children. In 2012 this is often not the case anymore, and attitudes need to change. Not every marital relationship fits neatly into the pigeon-holed standard that works for a lot of other people.

Edited June 2, 2012 by Hypnos