She's Gone? Really? Already?

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

The ####### part is way too short. Where did you get that photo? Not in Texas, that's for sure!

Hook 'em horns!

Edited March 6, 2012 by Why_Me

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

Set your standards high. Preferably 18 - 20 years old RUB gymnast...blonde hair, green/grey/or blue eyes, 4' 11" and around 95lbs. Deaf and dumb are a big plus.

Right. When you meet her, ask her (sign language) to take you home to meet her mother.

[baron555 934]

I'd say increase that lower range up to 27 rather than 24....big difference......and don't spend too much time with any below 32.....bigger difference.

And I"m sure you mention this but if the kids are living with you at home, you need to inform any woman about this early early.

Also what if she wants to have her own child? What is your answer to this?

[donnie7263 0]

I always inform them of my kids. That's the first thing I bring up. My kids don't live with me. I have them every other weekend. And I am not opposed to having more kids. Natalia and I talked about having 1 or 2 more.

[donnie7263 0]

Oh yeah! Natalia did take me to meet her mother. I thought she was for real then! Moms love me, so I had no problems even with the language barrier. Iphones work pretty good with a translator ap! LOL

[baron555 934]

Oh yeah! Natalia did take me to meet her mother. I thought she was for real then! Moms love me, so I had no problems even with the language barrier. Iphones work pretty good with a translator ap! LOL

Well, it sounds like at least you found a real woman, who may have been serious at one time, but it just didn't work out.

There is no guarantee than every woman you find will be compatible with each other. Maybe the content of your communication could be altered in the future to vet out what eventually happened here?

[slim 1,533]

Set your standards high. Preferably 18 - 20 years old RUB gymnast...blonde hair, green/grey/or blue eyes, 4' 11" and around 95lbs. Deaf and dumb are a big plus.

I like 'em to have a flat head too. Gives me somewhere to set my beer while they're down there doin their business.

In all seriousness, I don't like those "little" girls. I prefer them to be taller, bigger, and just generally shapely. I want a woman, not a 12 year old boy. I know to each their own, but one of the big reasons I couldn't really get too serious with any of the Asian girls I was banging was they're so darned small. Even the ones with big tatas were still pretty small statured women. I felt like they should be sitting on my lap and I should buy them ice cream or something before I dropped them off at school. Not exactly what I'm into.

Don't get me wrong, I'll knock 'em out all night long. But, when it comes to wifey material, I want a woman that's big enough if I reproduce with her we don't end up with kids that are kids their whole lives. I want my boys to play football. Not soccer.

language skills are key imo,

When I first started learning Russian my buddy and I chipped in on a book and tape set. (Tapes. That lets you know how long ago that was.) I didn't learn a bunch, but knowing basic words and phrases was enough to make them bust out in English. "You're not stupid like the rest of these jokers. You've taken the time to learn my language and for that, I will repay you with some bamdittybambambam."

I learned to say -

Hi.

What is your name?

You are very beautiful.

Where is the hotel?

And that's all it took. Just enough to let them know you're not the average sucker that'll rely on a translator for everything. Making the effort is what it's all about. Women don't care if you know something. They care that you took the time to TRY to learn something. "Billy, when I say I'm thirsty..." Don't go get her a cup of water. Be thirsty with her. Let her know you understand why she's thirsty and that you respect her position of being thirsty. Then ask if she would like to share some water with you.

It's not the language that matters. My buddies asked me, "Do you have problems communicating with your wife because she speaks Russian?" I said, "No. I have problems communicating with her because she's a woman."

Learn the basics (Hi, what's your name, nice to meet you, you're beautiful, I want, do you want, where, what, how, why, understand, yes, no, please, thank you, 1, 2, 3, 100, 1000, colors, house, car, taxi, hotel, apartment, food, eat, restroom, dance, drink, f#@k like crazy, smoke, cigarette, beer, vodka, breakfast, days of the week, good, bad, wonderful, etc.) and one big tip that I can't stress enough to people - learn to read Cyrillic. You can talk all you'd like but when you're standing on the platform of the subway and you don't know which way to go, you're assed out. The other big bonus of reading is you can read like a 3rd grader out of your phrase book and she'll think it's cute because you're trying so hard. Being cute = getting some.

Get some.

I bought childrens books. No sh!t, I bought books with pictures. First 100 words in Russian is awesome. Make little post-it sticky notes all over your apartment with the words in English and Russian. Over time you'll start to relate the picture with the words and you'll actually "see it" in the target language. Over a long enough timeline, you'll come to "think" in Russian. Instead of saying, "huh?" when someone says something, you'll find yourself saying, "Shto?"

Pimsleur is the best set I've found. I recommend it to everyone. Rosetta Stone didn't work well for me but it works for most. Play the CDs in your car while you're going to and from work and in just a few short months your accent will be gone. Say it out loud. You can have it in your head all day long but making your mouth move the way the words in your head are formed is almost impossible without muscle memory. Make it happen. Practice. People will think you're crazy. Who cares. You're going to be walking with a super model in a few short months. The joke is on them.

And one thing I'd never leave home without - My Lonely Planet Russian Phrasebook. Pound for pound the best little book you can buy for Russian language. If I could only take one item to Russia (Ukraine) with me, this would be it. Buy it. Use it.

Other than that, have fun. Keep the goal in mind at all times and you'll do fine. Good luck! (And don't forget to post pictures!)

[slim 1,533]

Another book I'd recommend is the Quick and Dirty Guide to Learning Languages Fast.

It was written by a green beret who learned something like 11 languages. He sets up a system of charts where you fill in words in the target language and study them. Definitely works well. Pick it up on E-Bay or Amazon for like $10.

I bought about $100 worth of Pimsleur and Russian language books. One of the best investments I've ever made.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

I like 'em to have a flat head too. Gives me somewhere to set my beer while they're down there doin their business.

In all seriousness, I don't like those "little" girls. I prefer them to be taller, bigger, and just generally shapely. I want a woman, not a 12 year old boy. I know to each their own, but one of the big reasons I couldn't really get too serious with any of the Asian girls I was banging was they're so darned small. Even the ones with big tatas were still pretty small statured women. I felt like they should be sitting on my lap and I should buy them ice cream or something before I dropped them off at school. Not exactly what I'm into.

Don't get me wrong, I'll knock 'em out all night long. But, when it comes to wifey material, I want a woman that's big enough if I reproduce with her we don't end up with kids that are kids their whole lives. I want my boys to play football. Not soccer.

Meh, I'm just over 6' 4" so height isn't a problem. Nothing wrong with bigger boned women that have some meat on their bones, it's just that all too often those women can't fight gravity later on in life like a smaller build gal can. Small and pert with no extra meat for me.

When I first started learning Russian my buddy and I chipped in on a book and tape set. (Tapes. That lets you know how long ago that was.) I didn't learn a bunch, but knowing basic words and phrases was enough to make them bust out in English. "You're not stupid like the rest of these jokers. You've taken the time to learn my language and for that, I will repay you with some bamdittybambambam."

I learned to say -

Hi.

What is your name?

You are very beautiful.

Where is the hotel?

And that's all it took. Just enough to let them know you're not the average sucker that'll rely on a translator for everything. Making the effort is what it's all about. Women don't care if you know something. They care that you took the time to TRY to learn something. "Billy, when I say I'm thirsty..." Don't go get her a cup of water. Be thirsty with her. Let her know you understand why she's thirsty and that you respect her position of being thirsty. Then ask if she would like to share some water with you.

It's not the language that matters. My buddies asked me, "Do you have problems communicating with your wife because she speaks Russian?" I said, "No. I have problems communicating with her because she's a woman."

Learn the basics (Hi, what's your name, nice to meet you, you're beautiful, I want, do you want, where, what, how, why, understand, yes, no, please, thank you, 1, 2, 3, 100, 1000, colors, house, car, taxi, hotel, apartment, food, eat, restroom, dance, drink, f#@k like crazy, smoke, cigarette, beer, vodka, breakfast, days of the week, good, bad, wonderful, etc.) and one big tip that I can't stress enough to people - learn to read Cyrillic. You can talk all you'd like but when you're standing on the platform of the subway and you don't know which way to go, you're assed out. The other big bonus of reading is you can read like a 3rd grader out of your phrase book and she'll think it's cute because you're trying so hard. Being cute = getting some.

Get some.

I bought childrens books. No sh!t, I bought books with pictures. First 100 words in Russian is awesome. Make little post-it sticky notes all over your apartment with the words in English and Russian. Over time you'll start to relate the picture with the words and you'll actually "see it" in the target language. Over a long enough timeline, you'll come to "think" in Russian. Instead of saying, "huh?" when someone says something, you'll find yourself saying, "Shto?"

Pimsleur is the best set I've found. I recommend it to everyone. Rosetta Stone didn't work well for me but it works for most. Play the CDs in your car while you're going to and from work and in just a few short months your accent will be gone. Say it out loud. You can have it in your head all day long but making your mouth move the way the words in your head are formed is almost impossible without muscle memory. Make it happen. Practice. People will think you're crazy. Who cares. You're going to be walking with a super model in a few short months. The joke is on them.

And one thing I'd never leave home without - My Lonely Planet Russian Phrasebook. Pound for pound the best little book you can buy for Russian language. If I could only take one item to Russia (Ukraine) with me, this would be it. Buy it. Use it.

Other than that, have fun. Keep the goal in mind at all times and you'll do fine. Good luck! (And don't forget to post pictures!)

Body language and one of those fancy translator machines. Dinner, booze and a few slow dances afterwards and nature tends to take over. I don't know a lick of Russian other than the basics like; hello, thank you, etc... and it hasn't been much of a hindrance.

[slim 1,533]

I don't know a lick of Russian other than the basics like; hello, thank you, etc... and it hasn't been much of a hindrance.

Maybe not, but the first time you bust out laughing when she's talking to her girlfriends and they all turn to you and say, "you understand?" you've leveled up immensely.

Force multiplier. That's what language is. Sure, you can get along without it, but if you have it, you're a force to be reckoned with.

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

Maybe not, but the first time you bust out laughing when she's talking to her girlfriends and they all turn to you and say, "you understand?" you've leveled up immensely.

Force multiplier. That's what language is. Sure, you can get along without it, but if you have it, you're a force to be reckoned with.

That used to bug me...not being able to understand what her and her friends and family were babbling about in Russian...and I mean it drove me nuts. Then I tried to learn Russian and I just can't do it. I mean that language hurts my mouth and makes my tongue sore trying to pronounce most of those words. And when I ask her for help she just tells me to use google...so right there I know she's trying to fck me on learning Russian. NP, because when she ask me to proof read her college homework I tell her now to shut it and google it. One turn deserves another.

Then I gave it some more thought and I thought to myself ...####### who cares. I mean do I really care what she's saying? I kind of do, and the more that I think about it the more I would rather be able to hear the game then hear her go on and on and on in Russian with her friends.

[slim 1,533]

That used to bug me...not being able to understand what her and her friends and family were babbling about in Russian...and I mean it drove me nuts. Then I tried to learn Russian and I just can't do it. I mean that language hurts my mouth and makes my tongue sore trying to pronounce most of those words. And when I ask her for help she just tells me to use google...so right there I know she's trying to fck me on learning Russian. NP, because when she ask me to proof read her college homework I tell her now to shut it and google it. One turn deserves another.

Then I gave it some more thought and I thought to myself ...####### who cares. I mean do I really care what she's saying? I kind of do, and the more that I think about it the more I would rather be able to hear the game then hear her go on and on and on in Russian with her friends.

By no means do I understand everything. But, she's not going to pull a fast one on me.

Honestly I don't care about "catching her" saying something. I simply want to be able to communicate effectively.

[tmma 467]

Slim, een boek schrijf , alstublieft!.

Deze Mannen hebben help nodig .

Edited March 7, 2012 by tmma

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

By no means do I understand everything. But, she's not going to pull a fast one on me.

Honestly I don't care about "catching her" saying something. I simply want to be able to communicate effectively.

Bedroom now! <----- As long as she understands those two words.....

[slim 1,533]

Slim, een boek schrijf , alstublieft!.

Deze Mannen hebben help nodig .

I really should. I've had several people tell me they'd like to read my memoirs after all the crazy stories I've told them.

In truth, I read a pretty decent little "how to" book while just a young man in Korea. One day I was sitting out on the perimeter guarding the *planes that are not there* and this maintenance guy came down to talk to me on his smoke break. He was telling me about this guidebook that he was reading and asked me if I'd like a copy. On his next smoke break he brought me one and I read it cover to cover that night. Simply awesome!

The book is called "Keys to the Kingdom" or the Songtan Survival Guide. It's an excellent read and universally applicable. All men should read it.

Bedroom now! <----- As long as she understands those two words.....

Words?

The one thing I really love about Russian women is they WANT to be picked up and carried off. I am a caveman. I will take what I want. And then you will make me a sandwich. (From the Saber Toothed Cat we BBQed last night!)