British citizens adjusting to living in America

[js229 0]

Hey everyone! I'm just curious...my fiance and I are starting our visa process and we're hoping he will move here at the very start of next year. I live in California. He's sooo easy to get along with and can make friends with anyone, but I'm a little nervous of how he'll adjust to living in California. It's one thing to visit for 2 weeks as it is to move here. He is from Scotland and has tons of friends he will be leaving behind. I've stayed in Scotland for 6 months on two occassions and I know first hand how different the culture is, it is a total pub culture there (which I enjoyed:)) And the banter and all that is so different. Just wondering how all of you UK citizens are adjusting to living in the states. I hope to hear everyone's experiences, or those of u who arent living here yet, I would love to hear your thoughts on coming.

Thanks guys

[LeftCoastLady 441]

Hooray! You should visit the UK forum: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/forum/99-united-kingdom/

There are quite a few threads on making the adjustment to US life.

[Penguin_ie 5,997]

***** Moving to Moving here and Your New Life in America forum as not K1 Visa Process related ****

[js229 0]

***** Moving to Moving here and Your New Life in America forum as not K1 Visa Process related ****

I never understand what u are trying to say to me in you replies lol

[Penguin_ie 5,997]

I never understand what u are trying to say to me in you replies lol

I am not replying to you really, just letting you know that I am moving your topic from one forum to another- it is one of the things organisers and moderators do to keep VisaJourney tidy and get you the best possible answers. You posted your question in the K1 fiance visa forum, but it has nothing to do with the K1 visa process (it is not about the forms, or affidavit of support, or the interview etc). I moved it to the Moving Here forum as this is the forum to discuss home sickness, how to adjust etc.

[Ellesse 11]

Hey everyone! I'm just curious...my fiance and I are starting our visa process and we're hoping he will move here at the very start of next year. I live in California. He's sooo easy to get along with and can make friends with anyone, but I'm a little nervous of how he'll adjust to living in California. It's one thing to visit for 2 weeks as it is to move here. He is from Scotland and has tons of friends he will be leaving behind. I've stayed in Scotland for 6 months on two occassions and I know first hand how different the culture is, it is a total pub culture there (which I enjoyed:)) And the banter and all that is so different. Just wondering how all of you UK citizens are adjusting to living in the states. I hope to hear everyone's experiences, or those of u who arent living here yet, I would love to hear your thoughts on coming.

Thanks guys

Hi there

As others have said, the UK forum may help you (and not just in answering this question but with any queries that you have as you get further into the process).

To answer your question though: I'm from the UK and I moved to the US last October. Honestly, the adjustment has been challenging at times because things are familiar, but not (if that makes any sense). The first couple of weeks were particularly tricky as I couldn't drive/didn't have access to a car which meant I was in the flat all the time - good for my cooking skills, but not for getting out and about. Since I got a car and my license in November, it's got better - love my independence! The other big thing is not working - I'm volunteering currently whilst looking for work, and I've read of other K1s doing the same. I'd definitely recommend something like that, or joining a club, maybe even looking at meetup.com to see what's happening in your area so that he's out and about meeting people and building up his social network. Without that, the first few months of not working could really drag. Not working sounds ideal, but when money's tight it's not so good!

I hope the process goes well for you both.

L

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

Where in California?

There are number of good British pubs in LA and SF if he gets homesick for them.

[js229 0]

Where in California?

There are number of good British pubs in LA and SF if he gets homesick for them.

About 30-40 minutes outside LA

[nutsmunkey2000 3]

Hi,

I can totally relate to what you are saying...

I moved to Southern California (Just outside of L.A) last October and have struggled a bit with the new lifestyle. Not working and having no friends here is the biggest problem as I find it hard to fill my time whilst the other half is at work all day with our only car...walking anywhere is a problem where we live as its pretty rural with few sidewalks or even shops/bars that don't require a car to get to, not to mention a total lack of public transport which is alien to me coming from central London.

I've tried volunteering with a few organizations however its tough to find one that's local enough that I can walk or cycle to, so I fill my time by keeping busy around the house with cleaning, walking the dog and staying on top of my adjustment of status situation by scouring this site everyday.

As another person said, meetup.com is worth a look as I have meet a few friends which I see about once a month for a drink, they are a nice bunch but live in the centre of L.A so I can't just nip out for a pint with them at the drop of a hat so it normally involves a planned event or night out weeks in advance.

To be honest I knew it would be like this until I start work and the first 4 months were ok but I am starting to get a bit down lately as I'm keen to work and make friends. I keep telling myself that I just have to sit it out until that EAD or greencard comes through and everything will be ok. After that we then plan to move somewhere more suited to our lifestyle i.e. bars and places to eat within a walking distance or at least a bus ride away.

Some tips that I found helpful are:

1, He can join a meetup group or two but the Expat ones tend to be full of Little Englanders/Anglo-files who want to constantly talk about Eastenders....boring old farts!!

2, He can join a rugby/Football team as there are loads about or even just help out with a youth sports team as an assistant.

3, Join a gun club/Rifle range as a way to blow off steam once in a while. I did this and its great as its not something we can do in England under normal circumstances.

4, Get a dog and walk it everyday...I have the odd chat with other dog walkers which passes the time

5, Join a cheap gym...might as well get fit whilst he's got the spare time

6, Spend time making contacts here ready for when he will eventually look for work i.e. Linkedin...he should also convert his C.V to a Resume and make a list of recruiters

6, Lastly volunteer like the other person has already mentioned...I've looked at the red cross and the big brothers programs not to mention the national parks service, they all look great but I would avoid any that reimburse you for gas money or any type of payment as he can get in trouble for it.

Its important that he stays positive as it can get you down and that's never good so early in a new marriage....remember its only temporary!! Also make the most of his/your weekends as I really look forward to them with my wife as its the only time I get the chance to jump in the car and get out of our sleepy little town, we head off on camping trips or go hiking as they are inexpensive.

Failing all that tell him to drop me a line and I'll happily go for a pint with him as I could do with a mate who is local.

Good Luck

Tony

[Trompe le Monde 1,107]

That is all very good advice - I loled about the Expat meetups being full of people talking about Eastenders. You want to stay away from those types! Most British people I've met in LA are generally pretty positive about living here - obviously you are going to miss things from home, but since Southern California is so different from home, there are a lot of positives as well (the weather, the mountains, the beach) and you may as well enjoy them.

If your fiance enjoys football and keeping fit, finding a local game to play in and a pub/bar to watch the matches is a really great way to meet people.

Edited March 3, 2012 by Trompe le Monde