Inappropriate Interview

[thelastpetitioner 218]

Hi all,

I believe that the IO could ask you things that were not sexual in nature to get the desired result, but I guess sex questions are a very good indicator of the truth. It would be rare that you would forget things like your partners favourite position, or how you had sex last night. Conversely it is easy to forget what colour your partner's tooth brush is or what his first pet's name was.

I do not like being asked about my sex life. I am a prude I guess.

My partner and I have discussed this and if asked we will say that we are waiting to have sex until marriage if asked. Whether or not that is a true statement, the IO will not know and not question, as long as our answers are the same.

Make sense?

Yes, perfect sense, I'm a prude Muslim , yet if the CO would have asked my husband about my breast size or me about his underwear preference I would have answered gladly.it's a small price to pay for spending a life time together

[brian_n_phuong 193]

Yes, perfect sense, I'm a prude Muslim , yet if the CO would have asked my husband about my breast size or me about his underwear preference I would have answered gladly.it's a small price to pay for spending a life time together

[jaycali 415]

Why the stokes?This one slipped in ... and broke a heart in the process (he should have had his AXX stoked!!):Well, for those who saw my post earlier this week and all of the drama.....he decided last night that he wasn't in love with me anymore and didn't want to be with me. He left my house and returned today with police to get his things. There's a ton of ugliness in between last nght and now that happened but emotionally, I can't relive that right now so I'll omit that. But I will say that it was discovered he was in fact using me for the visa and this entire marriage was a lie, for him. My heart is broken but I know this is for the better. I called ICE and filed my fraud complaint and will follow through with the remaining steps. I guess that the breaking point was when he had his friend confront me and tell me that I'm a crazy ###### if I thought any Dominican man would love an ugly gringa like me. And that he got what he wanted, the visa, so it was best to leave him alone now. The rest of my day consisted of an overwhelming amount of messages and emails from his family offering money not to report him. Smh. I know I'm crazy but I still love him. It absolutely kills me that he's done this and that I have to second guess all of the beautiful moments we had together. I may never get the answers I want but I'll have peace and that's most important. I want to thank everyone so much for all of their advice while I've been on here. This is an amazing site. My journey ends here ......

Who is this?? This is too sad/frustrating. I REALLY hope he gets deported and barred for life.

[Leatherneck 693]

Who is this?? This is too sad/frustrating. I REALLY hope he gets deported and barred for life.

Read about it here., then you'll know.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/354218-hes-gone-%3B/

[Leatherneck 693]

Hi all,

I believe that the IO could ask you things that were not sexual in nature to get the desired result, but I guess sex questions are a very good indicator of the truth. It would be rare that you would forget things like your partners favourite position, or how you had sex last night. Conversely it is easy to forget what colour your partner's tooth brush is or what his first pet's name was.

I do not like being asked about my sex life. I am a prude I guess.

My partner and I have discussed this and if asked we will say that we are waiting to have sex until marriage if asked. Whether or not that is a true statement, the IO will not know and not question, as long as our answers are the same.

Make sense?

No it does not make sense. So you would jeopardize the opportunity to be with your loved one in his/her country because you are a self confessed "prude?"

Makes no sense at all. Is it not better to get passed a few embarrassing questions and stay focused on the big picture to achieve the goal of immigrating?

[Xanax 349]

No it does not make sense. So you would jeopardize the opportunity to be with your loved one in his/her country because you are a self confessed "prude?"

Makes no sense at all. Is it not better to get passed a few embarrassing questions and stay focused on the big picture to achieve the goal of immigrating?

Hi, as long as your answers are the same, whether or not you say you are part of a swingers club or not partaking in sex until marriage it doesn't matter. I consulted an immigration attorney on this matter recently actually and this is how I knew!!! A apart from being a prude, it is my belief that talking about ones sexual life is not appropriate with strangers, even an IO.

As long as the answer are the same and streamlined that is all the matters.

The OP was not going to be tested / examined to prove the validity of her statements as to whether or not she had had sex. If she and he partner had both stated they were waiting until marriage to have sex that would be that.

If my partner and I walk into an interview and state we are waiting for marriage that would be the end of that line of questioning.

It is not jeaopardising ones chance to be with a loved one to say that at all.

---

Similarly, a friend of mine had a second interview (not in Australia) and due to religious reasons she stated she could and would answer said questions but it made her uncomfortable and was not inline with her religious beliefs, the IO then asked one for the less invasive sexual questions (lol) and moved on.

--

You are always within your right to express how you feel and your discomfort. IO's are not there to make our lives harder but to protect USC's and the country as a whole.

--

Hope this helps!

Edited February 26, 2012 by BrittandDan

[chaine1 116]

If my partner and I walk into an interview and state we are waiting for marriage that would be the end of that line of questioning.

Maybe, but it could also open up a whole new line of questioning - such as: Why are you waiting, what religion, etc. Seems risky.

[Shoot Em Straight 385]

Why the stokes?

This one slipped in ... and broke a heart in the process (he should have had his AXX stoked!!):

Well, for those who saw my post earlier this week and all of the drama.....he decided last night that he wasn't in love with me anymore and didn't want to be with me. He left my house and returned today with police to get his things. There's a ton of ugliness in between last nght and now that happened but emotionally, I can't relive that right now so I'll omit that. But I will say that it was discovered he was in fact using me for the visa and this entire marriage was a lie, for him. My heart is broken but I know this is for the better. I called ICE and filed my fraud complaint and will follow through with the remaining steps.

I guess that the breaking point was when he had his friend confront me and tell me that I'm a crazy ###### if I thought any Dominican man would love an ugly gringa like me. And that he got what he wanted, the visa, so it was best to leave him alone now.

The rest of my day consisted of an overwhelming amount of messages and emails from his family offering money not to report him. Smh.

I know I'm crazy but I still love him. It absolutely kills me that he's done this and that I have to second guess all of the beautiful moments we had together. I may never get the answers I want but I'll have peace and that's most important.

I want to thank everyone so much for all of their advice while I've been on here. This is an amazing site.

My journey ends here ......

Nice try to make a point but Sam the (OP who's husband just left)and I had a few PM's about this very subject and she WAS asked with her husband at her interview if they had sex the first night she arrived and if they used condoms or not...it is in her interview Review. I was shocked and she ironically said she had to go through it like most people going through this embassy. So this was a stoking and still it did not help weed the fraud. Sorry again to Sam!

I am personally glad OP made the choice to write about this and sorry people go through this type of interrogation.

Also to the Prude Muslim, I ready doubt your husband would explain your breast size and feel comfortable with compromising the beliefs of honoring his wife in Islam to obtain a Visa. Even a person that is not well educated in Islam would assume that is improper to discuss.

My young teenage daughter would know to refuse to speak of this.

My hope is no one will settle in order to live in a certain side of a border if it boils down to your own dignity. In any embassy or country it is not proper to be under duress to answer such private questions. I am sure some people dont mind answering...personally I would say it is not their business they need to ask me all other needed info that I would gladly cooperate with. And without any coaxing my husband would say the same. I know him well enough. God Willing.

[JimVaPhuong 4,863]

If you are subjected to a Stokes interview, either at a US consulate or a USCIS field office, you have the right to decline. Nobody will force you to undergo the interview. A US consulate cannot hold you against your will. USCIS, on the other hand, can take the alien into custody if they are out of status, but they can do nothing to a US citizen. Just be aware that if you decline the interview then the immigrant benefit you are applying for will be denied. You should also be aware that failing a Stokes interview at a USCIS field office has the potential to come with a finding of fraud under INA 204(c), which could result in a lifetime ban for the immigrant.

You can also agree to undergo the Stokes interview, and then respectfully decline to answer questions which you think are inappropriate. The interviewing officer can use your refusal to answer as a negative factor in applying their discretion to approve or deny the immigration benefit, but they won't automatically deny you for declining to answer some of their questions.

They ask questions about sex because it's been shown to be very effective in uncovering fraud. US immigration officers are well aware that fraudulent couples will spend hours drilling questions in preparation for an interview, and they would have covered all of the mundane topics in their rehearsals. However, a couple who are not intimate with each other are going to feel uncomfortable preparing answers to detailed questions about a sex life they don't actually have. US immigration officers know that topics of a deeply personal and intimate nature are likely to be a weakness for a fraudulent couple.

By the same token, a US citizen petitioner who is genuinely in love will likely remember all of the intimate details about their sex life, while a beneficiary who is playing the US citizen for a green card will have no emotional investment in the relationship, and their sex life would be something they'd just prefer to forget. Conflicting answers would probably be the result.

In either case, deeply personal questions have a reasonable chance of uncovering a sham relationship.

For those who believe that legal action should be taken to stop these interviews, or at least stop them from asking deeply personal questions, you might benefit from studying why these interviews are called "Stokes" interviews. Specifically you should research and study the 1976 case "Stokes v. INS , No. 74 Civ. 1022". This lawsuit resulted in specific procedures that the US government must follow when conducting a "marriage fraud interview". While the case was specifically in regard to the INS field office in New York, the result was a standardized policy for conducting these interviews at field offices throughout the US, and also at US consulates throughout the world. Several lawsuits have been filed since 1976 challenging the constitutionality of the Stokes interview process. I'm not aware of any that has succeeded in changing either USCIS/INS or Department of State policies.

[TBoneTX 45,299]

Sigh, man. It never fails, no man. Every time that I fail to log on to VJ for more than 24 hours, a crisis or significant situation arises regarding Guayaquil.

First thing is that the OP needs to update her timeline to reflect a second interview (same-day though it was) and that the first was not approved. The reason can be called 221g.

Second thing is that every Ecuador filer needs to read the "US Consulate in Guayaquil, Ecuador" thread (in the Embassy/Consulate forum) from beginning to end, before filing initially with USCIS and before interviewing.

Third thing is that every VJ contributor to any thread about the #######, hellhole Guayaquil consulate needs to read that thread from beginning to end before commenting on any thread about Ecuador.

Everyone should also read the Embassy Review of the ####### hellhole by PDXBicycleBoy, who got hosed perhaps the worst of any of us.

I have intentionally not yet written a review of my own experience in the ####### hellhole. I'm waiting until we file the N-400 for Mrs. T-B.'s citizenship and she becomes a USC. Afterwards, I plan to file an "after-visa complaint" with the Department of State (I have the contact information), with copy to the Consul General of the ####### hellhole.

If there's any mercy in your soul as a VJ member, the "campaign" that must begin and be successful is for the "US Consulate in Guayaquil, Ecuador" thread to be pinned in the Embassy/Consulate forum. To keep it where people might notice it, it's had to be bumped far too many times. Captain Ewok, our intrepid leader, is the sole approval authority. Thank you in advance, si man.

[keysjangle 145]

I'll have pictures ready for my interview :innocent:

[nica 5]

Are Stokes interviews specifically for K1 visas? I'm doing CR-1 and we recently got married, so I know we'll have to reapply in two years. Will we be going through a similar "Stokes" interview process?

Edited February 26, 2012 by nica

[TBoneTX 45,299]

Are Stokes interviews specifically for K1 visas? I'm doing CR-1 and we recently got married, so I know we'll have to reapply in two years. Will we be going through a similar "Stokes" interview process?

Couples in Ecuador routinely undergo Stokes reamings. The odds vary according to embassy and situation.

[Leatherneck 693]

Couples in Ecuador routinely undergo Stokes reamings. The odds vary according to embassy and situation.

Finally you show up Mr. TBone, I was calling out to ya, si man!

[Peter_Pan 661]

When they asked us when we started dating we said the general "oh in January of 2010" and we looked at each other searching for an approximate date.

I have no idea when we started dating, because the transition from friends to lovers was so smooth and I don't much care about stuff like aniversaries either. I would think someone who is committing a fraud would be more likely to know such stuff.