Need to Vent.

[Vicky and Larry 27]

So, I just got my K1 Approved and I am awaiting the visa's to be couriered to the address I am staying at. I should be happy right, well, I am, sort of, but I am also majorly bummed out. BIG TIME!

I have been staying in London since the end of January after returning from a 3 month stay with my fiance' in America. I choose to stay in London for the remainder of the process so I could be close by for the medical and interview, and so that I could spend time with my closest friend (who really is all the family I have in the U.K) before I leave.

It's been a hell of a time.

We booked accommodation through a site called Airbnb, which has turned out to be disastrous. We wanted to keep the costs down, so we thought this would be a better alternative than hostels. The first accommodation was awful, no heating, limited access to electricicty, hardly any furniture in the place, and very unclean. I am not picky or unreasonable, but it was horrid. We paid 800.00 pounds for the month in that place, so it wasn't all that cheap either. At the time I was there one other guest was also leaving and took pictures to report it back to Airbnb. I stayed there for as long as I could hack it then we found accommodation elsewhere.

Airbnb have been less than helpful. Ignoring emails or offering us ridiculous vouchers in the hope that we will just go away.

The next accommodation was a nightmare too, heating breaking and having no water in the whole place - not a single drop out of a tap. A flood when there was water. Oh, I swear it just added a load of stress to what was all ready a potentially emotionally charged situation. I have watched these nightmares from hell holiday programs and now I feel like I have been the principal character in one - even mice coming into the kitchen.

I also got very sick. Really sick. I am just about recovering now. I have never felt so god damn awful before and I have had some serious things happen to me health wise in the past. I went to the hospital eventually who said that I had an infection along with a nasty virus, which was making it harder for me to recover. I had constant nausea and loss of appetite for a month, crazy high temperature and on and on. I was given two lots of medication and I seem to be on the mend now.

Now my fiance's dog has torn her ACL which is going to cost us 3000 dollars to fix and cancel our honeymoon, which was only 4 days away in a log cabin in the same state that he lives.

I feel so annoyed right now.

I know I should look on the bright side, and I usually do, but I think I have just about had enough. Going through the immigration process has had it's own stresses, as I am sure you can appreciate. Always feeling at the mercy of the system, not being able to adequately plan in advance, having to compromise on so many things.

I know being together is the main thing, but I just feel a little cheated right now. I have never been married before and I had come to terms with a quick 5 minute unromantic courthouse wedding, but with all these extra issues I am just feeling so vexed.

I am not one of those fortunate people who have had an easy life, there probably isn't many who would consider they have. I had it tough as nails growing up and just about survived a terrible childhood. I have been independent pretty much most of my life -- from the age of 15, raised a child by myself without any support from anyone. And, I just hoped that getting married would look a little bit more like I would have wanted.

I know finding a partner who I consider my best-friend is what's important, but I am finding it hard to feel philosophical about everything right now. We won't be able to afford to have another wedding, and getting married at a courthouse and then just going home again without any real celebration or time alone sucks!

I am so p*ssed and feeling down.

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

Is Larry aware of how you are feeling? What is his solution to these issues? Dog surgery vs honeymoon.......

Really, I am sorry you are feeling down, it must be the moon. Things will get better just hold on.

[Vicky and Larry 27]

Is Larry aware of how you are feeling? What is his solution to these issues? Dog surgery vs honeymoon.......

Really, I am sorry you are feeling down, it must be the moon. Things will get better just hold on.

He is disappointed because he knows that I have made a lot of compromises and not made a big fuss about it, just as he has. I would not feel right going away on a honeymoon with the dog limping around on 3 legs. He's trying to come up with solutions, but I am not ready to do that just yet. I just had a good cry and that's what I will do until I get it out of my system.

Thanks for responding. I wasn't sure if anyone would? I don't always allow myself to feel these things, because there are always people in the world much worse off, but I really do feel so sad and frustrated.

Thanks again.

[LIFE'SJOURNEY 970]

He is disappointed because he knows that I have made a lot of compromises and not made a big fuss about it, just as he has. I would not feel right going away on a honeymoon with the dog limping around on 3 legs. He's trying to come up with solutions, but I am not ready to do that just yet. I just had a good cry and that's what I will do until I get it out of my system.

Thanks for responding. I wasn't sure if anyone would? I don't always allow myself to feel these things, because there are always people in the world much worse off, but I really do feel so sad and frustrated.

Thanks again.

Lay in bed all day, and eat a pint of your favorite ice-cream. Then tomorrow get up and run the calories off.

[Vicky and Larry 27]

Lay in bed all day, and eat a pint of your favorite ice-cream. Then tomorrow get up and run the calories off.

[Moomin 292]

He is disappointed because he knows that I have made a lot of compromises and not made a big fuss about it, just as he has. I would not feel right going away on a honeymoon with the dog limping around on 3 legs. He's trying to come up with solutions, but I am not ready to do that just yet. I just had a good cry and that's what I will do until I get it out of my system.

Thanks for responding. I wasn't sure if anyone would? I don't always allow myself to feel these things, because there are always people in the world much worse off, but I really do feel so sad and frustrated.

Thanks again.

Am really sorry you're frustrated about the whole mess! Always sad when things seem to not want to work out the way you want.

The second time I went to the US to visit, my then-fiance had a flu and was sick for 2 out of the weeks of my visit. Lovely!

I went through most of my savings paying for the K1, medical, plane tickets, shipping belongings and then of course bringing my dog to the US. That dog cost me alot of money to bring to the US(cage, vet, vacc., plane ticket, pet passport, changing my own tickets due to embargo rules etc.), the same for my husband preparing for our arrival(furniture and misc things). We went out in the middle of a forest and spent some days there after our wedding. Not the day of the wedding because my stepson became hysterical the evening we planned to go so we stayed home instead. All in all probably not what you'd categorize as a honeymoon.

However, my husband did take off some days from work so we could spend time together and that was all that mattered after being apart for too many months. I admit those weren't my thoughts and feelings when sitting in home country hoping we'd at least do something "special" after our wedding but being in each others presence was most important, not the location. We might take a delayed honeymoon to my home country instead. THAT would be better than any right-after-the-wedding honeymoon IMO.

Hope for a healthy recovery for the dog, and that you'll be in the US soon reunited and less frustrated.

Edited February 21, 2012 by moomin

[IR5FORMUMSIE 850]

He is disappointed because he knows that I have made a lot of compromises and not made a big fuss about it, just as he has. I would not feel right going away on a honeymoon with the dog limping around on 3 legs. He's trying to come up with solutions, but I am not ready to do that just yet. I just had a good cry and that's what I will do until I get it out of my system.

Thanks for responding. I wasn't sure if anyone would? I don't always allow myself to feel these things, because there are always people in the world much worse off, but I really do feel so sad and frustrated.

Thanks again.

We're here to help each other out, so... remember that you lived through ####### that most of us couldn't deal with let alone live with. Your compassion and humanity are what give you your strength. You're a winner, and class will out, so if you feel like crying, let it out, don't worry, Vicks, we got your back.

Maybe this might help a bit.

[X Factor 1,112]

A hard choice between taking care of the dog or honeymoon...

Edited February 21, 2012 by kennard

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Using the honeymoon money for surgery on a pet seems like a misappropriation of funds, IMO. I'd be more than just miffed.

[Vicky and Larry 27]

Using the honeymoon money for surgery on a pet seems like a misappropriation of funds, IMO. I'd be more than just miffed.

The funds are not the major issue it's the time the dog will need to recover. We can't put her in doggy day care while we are away, because they obviously won't accept a dog that's not fit. And, honestly if it was down to money I could not go away and enjoy myself knowing we had spent money on a honeymoon instead of her well-being.

I am miffed, but at the situation.

[Vicky and Larry 27]

Am really sorry you're frustrated about the whole mess! Always sad when things seem to not want to work out the way you want.

The second time I went to the US to visit, my then-fiance had a flu and was sick for 2 out of the weeks of my visit. Lovely!

I went through most of my savings paying for the K1, medical, plane tickets, shipping belongings and then of course bringing my dog to the US. That dog cost me alot of money to bring to the US(cage, vet, vacc., plane ticket, pet passport, changing my own tickets due to embargo rules etc.), the same for my husband preparing for our arrival(furniture and misc things). We went out in the middle of a forest and spent some days there after our wedding. Not the day of the wedding because my stepson became hysterical the evening we planned to go so we stayed home instead. All in all probably not what you'd categorize as a honeymoon.

However, my husband did take off some days from work so we could spend time together and that was all that mattered after being apart for too many months. I admit those weren't my thoughts and feelings when sitting in home country hoping we'd at least do something "special" after our wedding but being in each others presence was most important, not the location. We might take a delayed honeymoon to my home country instead. THAT would be better than any right-after-the-wedding honeymoon IMO.

Thanks for sharing your experiences. I know what you are saying is true, I just need time to that state of mind. I was really looking forward to getting away from it all and using the time not only to be together, but also to help me recover and rejuvenate myself after the last few months.

I am sure we will think of something..

Thank you.

Hope for a healthy recovery for the dog, and that you'll be in the US soon reunited and less frustrated.

We're here to help each other out, so... remember that you lived through ####### that most of us couldn't deal with let alone live with. Your compassion and humanity are what give you your strength. You're a winner, and class will out, so if you feel like crying, let it out, don't worry, Vicks, we got your back.

Maybe this might help a bit.

Thank you, you said very kind thoughtful things.