what once married, couples normaly do? will they have a chared account or not?

[Fandango 1,439]

I think it's sad that you have to give up your whole life, quit your job, leave your home country, family, friends, everything you know really...to move here to be with a man who don't even wanna put your name on a bank acct.

Sorry, but it's the way I feel....

[raymaga 25]

My husband and I have a joint bank account and the only problem we have with it is that one of us can't buy gifts, etc. for the other without us finding out how much the item cost, especially at Christmas and birthdays.

So, we have talked about keeping our joint account and each opening up our own accounts just to use for gifts, etc.

We know lots of couples who have separate bank accounts and they like it just fine. It wouldn't work for me, so I guess it's up to each individual couple to decide.

[chri'stina 190]

We have a joint account.

We then have a 2nd account that is only in my name that we use for our savings. I've had it forever and just didn't add Sujeet to it since we already have the joint.

And Sujeet has an account with just his name on it that he uses to send money to India, for his gas money for commuting to work, and etc.

That way we budget everything as soon as he gets a paycheck and we know what to transfer to each account, and it works out good for us. We can easily switch money back and forth between our accounts online. We both have online access to all 3 accounts-no secrets.

Edited October 3, 2006 by stina&suj

[Marilyn. 340]

My hubby just finally added me to his account after about a year and a half... that is mainly because we are procrastinators and partly because my hubby's work hours sucked

We were waiting to get my Cali driver's license which I got back in May.... I procrastinated getting that too..

then we had to find the time to get to the bank....

I did have full access to my hubby's account before that though.... but now I have my own ATM card

[almaty 19]

I think it's sad that you have to give up your whole life, quit your job, leave your home country, family, friends, everything you know really...to move here to be with a man who don't even wanna put your name on a bank acct.

Sorry, but it's the way I feel....

I AGREE !

[Fandango 1,439]

I think it's sad that you have to give up your whole life, quit your job, leave your home country, family, friends, everything you know really...to move here to be with a man who don't even wanna put your name on a bank acct.

Sorry, but it's the way I feel....

I AGREE !

Dean, fwiw, the correct response is 'me too' :P

[almaty 19]

I think it's sad that you have to give up your whole life, quit your job, leave your home country, family, friends, everything you know really...to move here to be with a man who don't even wanna put your name on a bank acct.

Sorry, but it's the way I feel....

I AGREE !

Dean, fwiw, the correct response is 'me too' :P

i am such a chopf##k..sister lisa...

[ladybird216 2]

As you say that you cannot open an account in your name yet, would it be possible for you both to open a joint account for a 'slush fund' that you can have access to. It would help you to establish some credit in the US and also give you some independence.

Edited October 3, 2006 by ladybird216

[Joey559 1]

Paul and I have a joint account, but we each have separate accounts for presents, daily spending. We also share a credit card under my name.

Our deacon told us the Catholic Church doesn't even like to marry people, and can and will often refuse to, who get pre-nups. When you take eachother you take ALL of eachother and share EVERYTHING. What's his is your's and vice versa...man, I'd think it pretty strange if someone pledged to love me until death but didn't trust me with his bank account...just my two cents (sorry, sort of bad pun there)

[CarolineM 0]

My husband and I have a joint bank account and the only problem we have with it is that one of us can't buy gifts, etc. for the other without us finding out how much the item cost, especially at Christmas and birthdays.

That was our issue too!! He has his own Credit card that I have access to, but not when I log into my bank account or on my statements...that way he can use it for gifts, and I have a credit card with the same deal.

The joint accounts are great though Makes it so easy IMHO

[frndly1 1]

We have a yours, mine and ours? It works great for me.

[ChristinaM 0]

My husband is the other way - he sees everything coming in, no matter how or why, as "ours". If he had his way, we'd have a joint account and nothing else. I personally don't like that idea; not because I don't trust him, but because I feel it's important to have a little privacy and independance. If I want to spend $50 having my hair done, I don't want an earful about it. If he wants to spend $50 on video games, it's easier if he can just do it without worrying what I'm going to say.

Provided the bills get paid on time and both parties have fair access to money (which doesn't necessarily mean "equal access", in my opinion), I don't see it to be a lack of trust to want to have separate accounts.

[jordanianprincess 0]

I think it's sad that you have to give up your whole life, quit your job, leave your home country, family, friends, everything you know really...to move here to be with a man who don't even wanna put your name on a bank acct.

Sorry, but it's the way I feel....

Could not have said it better myself!