nat geo

[james&olya 1,121]

The truth is there's no more sincere love than that from the damsel who was been rescued from her distress. There's also no better sex than that. This is Romance Novel sex. That love will furthermore branch out through her whole extended family. Millions of years' evolution dictate that the woman finds love in security for child-rearing. Some western women try to pretend they do not operate on that basis when they are already secure in it - so they are nothing more than hypocrites if they attack another woman on that basis.

The only thing to "own up to" for a man is that he is not an idiot who feels obligated to marry a fat old ungrateful hag in order to please people who suffer from jealousy and envy. Talk about stupid. What is to be ashamed of in bringing home a hot young babe that blows the doors off every other chick in the county - and treats you like the King of the Realm?

Well said!! (politically incorrect according to some! Wondering if we are going to have to hear from some of them. I can think of a few that I hope stay put in their own forums!)

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

We are all speaking for one moment in time. A few years ago I sounded the same as you guys. Aren't these Russians wonderful! Boosting now is fine but unless you've pasted the 5 year mark, it means little to me. Rave on but just don't go into denial of what's happening out in the world. The failure rate is high for all marriages.

Sure there are no guarantees even after 5 years, but here we are going on 4 years and I can tell you that if it didn't work out it would not be because she is Ukrainian.

[slim 1,530]

a bunch of rusty trucks and trailer homes on the side of the road, got here and you gotta drive to a rinky-dink mall.. yeah.. reality hits you hard and fast...

but i still wouldn't trade it for anything ahah... i love my "old kentucky home" lol

I'm probably going to cross this river in the next few years and never come back! I visit Kentucky several times a year and each time I grow more fond of it.

It would be interesting to know the percentage of RUB women who return home in the first 90 days.

In all my years here on VJ I've only heard of it a handful of times. A couple of our "active" members did a K-1 and didn't marry the girl (then married a different girl via K-1). A few others didn't get married within the 90 but got married later. And others still did a K-1 and went to Russia instead.

The vast majority are K-1s that go through and they get married within the 90 days. Leaving after green card is way more common than leaving within the 90.

seems like RUB are not really that popular of mail-order brides as phillipinas...

It's a quality of life issue.

The majority of Filipinas are marrying way, way, waaaaaaaaay up when they marry grandpa their husbands. Girls from RUB are moving from one pretty nice country to another. They really don't have the incentive to move up like they did when the curtain was first lifted and life in RUB was uncertain. They can have a relatively nice life in their home country and the only thing they're really short on is men to do it with. Thus, they're a lot more choosy than their little brown sisters.

We're seeing a growing MOB industry in places like China and Columbia. Those countries (like the PI) have many intelligent and beautiful ladies and as they become more popular destinations, the number of K-1 beneficiaries will go up as well.

The RUB women were more of a fad. Here are full-size white women who could be bought for pennies on the dollar compared to their American cousins and it was like Christmas morning when men figured it out. But, after thinking with the big head (instead of the initial reaction with the little head) they realized social stigma and worrying about what other people think isn't that big of a deal when it comes to long term happiness and the better overall value of a MOB from a country such as the PI, China or Columbia.

And let me be clear that I prefer it this way, OMG yes.

My wife and I hardly ever do any "business" together, save one!

The had sex without any mention of a green card. Americans far overrate themselves in the green card category I think. Actually we are just great lovers!

This has to be true because I've "met" women from all over the world and every nationality has been interested in being bedded by "the Americans."

We are all speaking for one moment in time. A few years ago I sounded the same as you guys. Aren't these Russians wonderful! Boosting now is fine but unless you've pasted the 5 year mark, it means little to me. Rave on but just don't go into denial of what's happening out in the world. The failure rate is high for all marriages.

I'm past the five year mark.

But, I will concede, it's still not an easy go and we're definitely not the sunshine and puppy dogs romantics. We're probably closer to divorce than we are to true love.

I still think the Russians (and RUB in general) are wonderful. Is my wife perfect? No. But, I don't see any other culture of women anywhere else in the world that does as much to be "women."

Tai-chi, man. It'll suck all that venom right out.

How do you recommend getting started in Tai-chi? I've always wanted to do it but I'm not sure how to start. Books? YouTube vids? Tai-chi for dummies?

[rlogan 2,036]

So the UK/Canada folks visit the PI forum also! I wondered about that.

Heh. That would be a candidate pool for "My love is purer than yours because he did not improve my life as much as your spouse improved yours". But it still comes down to their individual character. It is hard for egotistical people even with a RUB immigrant to stop themselves from this manipulative conceit. All they have to do is turn to a couple where the immigrant is from a country with a lower per capita income than RUB countries and say the same thing. You learn about what kind of people to choose as friends, work associates or spouses by watching whether they do this. Avoid those people because they've proven their character and you'll get nothing but put-downs everywhere they think they can manipulate you into feeling bad. Do not waste your scarce trust on such people because they won't be there for you no matter how much you give to them.

Check out the GDP per capita rankings on Google so you know which countries to be conceited about if you have that kind of character, and which ones can make you the target of that kind of malicious attack.

I spent quite a bit of time in Russia on many trips, mostly the far East - a month in Yakutsk, but Magadan and Khabarosk too, and I designed the curriculum for Russian business students who came over to our University to replace the old Marxist professors. I did wrestling exchanges with the Korkin institute through Pavel Pinnigin who is a olympic gold medalist and three time world champion. When the wall came down he came to my wrestling school because I had wrestled for Gable at Iowa in college and our team had won five straight state titles. Pinigin kicked my a##. He was amazing.

I learned an awful lot during those years and had considered a Russian wife, either ethnic Yakut or Russian. The one thing I observed in frankness was a kind of coldness that communism imparted - an indifference to life itself even - that I hope is changing. This was immediately after the wall came down, and for about six years after. People were shocked at things I did when I first visited - Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky smiling and whistling as he went down the street. They said to walk with my head down, do not smile, do not whistle, etc. In a Jeep once with some people on a hunting trip they went out of their way to run over a dog, and thought that was the most hilarious thing. At that time the old communist officials had ensconced themselves into high positions in business, universities and etc. so there was still a lot of fear and uncertainty over the future.

Yet, there were people who were incredibly generous with what little they had too, and there was no shortage of hotties with one main concern: they wanted a man that didn't drink. According to them, three out of five men were alcoholics - and this was way more important to them than how much money a man made. I suppose we could make up the same kind of conceit about Russian women "only" wanting a man that isn't an alcoholic and how they aren't so choosy otherwise. But the truth is that such an interest is wise of them, just as is seeking economic security. We should commend them for it, not get all conceited and put them down for it. Nor put down the man that doesn't drink: "Oh, she just loves you because you don't drink".

My God people refused to lay off me - demanding I drink at every hour of the day. Toast this, toast that. The military guys were actually stealing some kind of fluid they used in the lines of vehicles or airplanes or whatever it was and drinking that. Hydraulic or brake line fluid or something. I learned to tell them it was my religion - that was the only thing that stopped them from harassing me, but it worked like a charm.

I do wonder if the coldness that I observed is still pervasive. Or the alcoholism. There was zero problem with meeting the ladies and not being a drinker was a huge draw, plus running around with the top Dynamo guys - they were like royalty and got away with murder. Not that the girls weren't eager to bed you - it was more like the difference between people who have dogs vs people who have cats as pets. One is all bubbly and warm and the other has a kind of aloofness. To each his own, so neither is better than the other but I am a dog person for sure!

[slim 1,530]

"My love is purer than yours because he did not improve my life as much as your spouse improved yours".

I love to show them pictures and bank statements. "She's not with me for the money or my looks..... so, what is it?" (And then I usually wink, wink, nudge, nudge, as I make the baby's arm holding an apple type gesture.)

When the wall came down he came to my wrestling school because I had wrestled for Gable at Iowa in college and our team had won five straight state titles. Pinigin kicked my a##. He was amazing.

I so wish wrestling got the respect it deserved. There's no better individual sport out there. When SI snubbed Cael Sanderson in favor of those girls that kick that little white ball around, it was proof that America just doesn't like what wrestling embodies. Proof that we're totally against individual accomplishment and personal responsibility. We'd rather be on a team than do something impossible all by ourselves.

It's even better when you get to wrestle the same guy several times throughout the season. When he beats you the first two or three... but you beat him at the end of the season when it matters. You beat him because you've been training harder. Eating leaner. Running up and down more of those goddamned steps and jumping more rope than he has. You've persevered. You've emerged victorious!

And more importantly... you've learned how to overcome losing.

My little brothers still wrestle. I love heading into the gym at 6:00 AM and watching the barely-awake boys roll out the mats, the stuffing of cotton up someone's nose, the little girl chasing the ref with the towel because she forgot to hit him when time expired. And I love the look of satisfaction on someone's face when their arm is raised after they triumph over their adversary.

I observed in frankness was a kind of coldness that communism imparted - an indifference to life itself even - that I hope is changing. This was immediately after the wall came down, and for about six years after.

That's still there among those who lived through it. Among the younger ones though... not so much. They're consumed as much by greed and irrelevence as we are.

I do wonder if the coldness that I observed is still pervasive. Or the alcoholism.

It gets better with time and I've found the ladies to be more open and warm as their situation improves.

But, part of the big draw, for me at least, is these chicks, by and large, are no strangers to adversity so when the zombie apocalypse comes along, we'll be ready!

[mox 298]

How do you recommend getting started in Tai-chi? I've always wanted to do it but I'm not sure how to start. Books? YouTube vids? Tai-chi for dummies?

No idea at all. I rarely take my own advice.

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

I love to show them pictures and bank statements. "She's not with me for the money or my looks..... so, what is it?" (And then I usually wink, wink, nudge, nudge, as I make the baby's arm holding an apple type gesture.)

You are too subtle. I tell them it is the $1 million in the bank and the big c*ck. They always accuse me of lying and I say "Yeah, I really don't have $1 million"

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

Nor put down the man that doesn't drink: "Oh, she just loves you because you don't drink".

My God people refused to lay off me - demanding I drink at every hour of the day. Toast this, toast that. The military guys were actually stealing some kind of fluid they used in the lines of vehicles or airplanes or whatever it was and drinking that. Hydraulic or brake line fluid or something. I learned to tell them it was my religion - that was the only thing that stopped them from harassing me, but it worked like a charm.

You nailed this one. I can tell you that way on top of Alla's list of my good traits is "he does not drink at all"

I can also second the experience of working in Ukraine and having serious "social issues" with the men for a while who took terrible offense in that I was not drinking alcohol with them. I took quite some doing to make them undertand I DO NOT DRINK ALCOHOL. ever, at all, ever. This was hard for them to believe but once they did and once they understood it was a matter of taste and not some high handed morals (I actually have NO morals) then it was OK. I do not think the religion excuse would have worked, they may have stopped being offended but probably would not have invited me anymore. I wanted to join the parties I just did not want to drink alcohol.

As far as the jealous women that worry about their husbands dumping them for something better or the dismayed men that slap themselves on the head and say "I could have had a RUB woman!" Oh well, we usually tell them to get lost. They are actually more offended by our existance than the RUB men that I would not drink alcohol with, but since I have no desire to party with them...who cares?

FWIW my wife is no better off here financially than she was in Ukraine. At least not in terms of social class. She has a car, but she did not need a car there, so that is not even a wash. Every other part of her standard of living is the same and in some ways worse here. She does have more clothes and shoes here, that is probably a big plus. I can look around and see there is nothing here we do not have at our flat in Ukraine except the dryer and the dishwasher. Neither are anything she would move halfway 'round the world for. Even the climate is about the same.

For all that, she is much happier here now than at first, she says Ukraine offers her little any more except visiting friends and her mother. She also likes going to the theatre which is much cheaper there.

[visaveteran1 33]

How do you recommend getting started in Tai-chi? I've always wanted to do it but I'm not sure how to start. Books? YouTube vids? Tai-chi for dummies?

It's a soft form of the martial arts. You'd find a Sensei or group and join. After you learn the different movements you can do it alone if you like. Usually people practice Tai Ch in the morning to start the day correctly.

[UK_Fan 192]

I'm probably going to cross this river in the next few years and never come back! I visit Kentucky several times a year and each time I grow more fond of it.

this past summer we crossed that same river to go to kings island and seeing as how we live in a tiny little town in a tri-state area, Cincinnatti looked like freaking NYC to me.. seeing Bengals stadium alone tickled my fancy to death lol.

i love big cities, and all the hectic lifestyle that goes with it, our little boro is soooooooo boro-ing ahaha. nevertheless, i love the state and all that goes with it, especially Basketball lol

Edited February 6, 2012 by Mrs.Brock

[UK_Fan 192]

.

I spent quite a bit of time in Russia on many trips, mostly the far East - a month in Yakutsk, but Magadan and Khabarosk too, and I designed the curriculum for Russian business students who came over to our University to replace the old Marxist professors. I did wrestling exchanges with the Korkin institute through Pavel Pinnigin who is a olympic gold medalist and three time world champion. When the wall came down he came to my wrestling school because I had wrestled for Gable at Iowa in college and our team had won five straight state titles. Pinigin kicked my a##. He was amazing.

I learned an awful lot during those years and had considered a Russian wife, either ethnic Yakut or Russian. The one thing I observed in frankness was a kind of coldness that communism imparted - an indifference to life itself even - that I hope is changing. This was immediately after the wall came down, and for about six years after. People were shocked at things I did when I first visited - Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky smiling and whistling as he went down the street. They said to walk with my head down, do not smile, do not whistle, etc. In a Jeep once with some people on a hunting trip they went out of their way to run over a dog, and thought that was the most hilarious thing. At that time the old communist officials had ensconced themselves into high positions in business, universities and etc. so there was still a lot of fear and uncertainty over the future.

first of all.. just wanted to say that i'm from Magadan i love seeing that people know that my little town actually "exists" lol

anyways.. all i wanted to say is that it irks me that some men SPECIFICALLY go on a hunt for an international wife.. this is really what this whole topic has been about for me.. they couldn't find anyone around, so they go and look for a wife in another country. there is nothing wrong with it, i don't guess, to each their own, but marriage as a business transaction is just mind-boggling to me.

i feel awful criticizing people for their choices, but look how many cases are out there when a poor little woman from a thrird world country comes here and it turns out that her husband is holding the green card over her head and treating her like a slave.. far more then there should be. frankly, i think that it is one of the main reasons American men go out of country to find a wife.

and men are not the only ones that are doing it, sometimes women are at fault and end up using unsuspecting americans.. of course there are 2 sides to a coin.

and listen, if they met online on their own or whatever, that's a different story, but i'm specifically talking about the ones that pay agencies to find them a wife and in most cases, they don't even communicate without a chaperone. to me, it's demeaning to a marriage, because had i been one of those mail-orded brides, i would always know that my husband paid someone money for me and that would just be awful.

[james&olya 1,121]

anyways.. all i wanted to say is that it irks me that some men SPECIFICALLY go on a hunt for an international wife.. this is really what this whole topic has been about for me.. they couldn't find anyone around, so they go and look for a wife in another country. there is nothing wrong with it, i don't guess, to each their own, but marriage as a business transaction is just mind-boggling to me.

i feel awful criticizing people for their choices, but look how many cases are out there when a poor little woman from a thrird world country comes here and it turns out that her husband is holding the green card over her head and treating her like a slave.. far more then there should be. frankly, i think that it is one of the main reasons American men go out of country to find a wife.

and men are not the only ones that are doing it, sometimes women are at fault and end up using unsuspecting americans.. of course there are 2 sides to a coin.

and listen, if they met online on their own or whatever, that's a different story, but i'm specifically talking about the ones that pay agencies to find them a wife and in most cases, they don't even communicate without a chaperone. to me, it's demeaning to a marriage, because had i been one of those mail-orded brides, i would always know that my husband paid someone money for me and that would just be awful.

Hold on there a minute! While I and many others on here might agree with you on some of what you say I think you may be a bit off base to make some of the assumptions you do! I used an international dating site to find my wife. I made several trips over there to meet people. But the reasons I was looking there are way more involved than what you generalize about and I suspect the same is true for the majority of men and women who have done this! In my case it was difficult to find someone in my area that appreciated a hard-working, non-drinking, physically fit and active homebody type of male that also fit those categories and who was interested in living in a far northern, high snowfall Michigan town far from big cities! And I have been amazed at how much richer my life has become by being involved with a Russian! So call my wife a MOB if you want but I personally find that sort of label ridiculous! It is a fact of life that the internet is playing a larger and larger role in dating for the majority of people out there. What makes it so different just because you expand your dating horizons to another country? Be careful about using stereotypes to judge situations! When you do this you are 'pre-judging' which is... PREJUDICE!

[Gary and Alla 3,694]

first of all.. just wanted to say that i'm from Magadan i love seeing that people know that my little town actually "exists" lol

anyways.. all i wanted to say is that it irks me that some men SPECIFICALLY go on a hunt for an international wife.. this is really what this whole topic has been about for me.. they couldn't find anyone around, so they go and look for a wife in another country. there is nothing wrong with it, i don't guess, to each their own, but marriage as a business transaction is just mind-boggling to me.

i feel awful criticizing people for their choices, but look how many cases are out there when a poor little woman from a thrird world country comes here and it turns out that her husband is holding the green card over her head and treating her like a slave.. far more then there should be. frankly, i think that it is one of the main reasons American men go out of country to find a wife.

and men are not the only ones that are doing it, sometimes women are at fault and end up using unsuspecting americans.. of course there are 2 sides to a coin.

and listen, if they met online on their own or whatever, that's a different story, but i'm specifically talking about the ones that pay agencies to find them a wife and in most cases, they don't even communicate without a chaperone. to me, it's demeaning to a marriage, because had i been one of those mail-orded brides, i would always know that my husband paid someone money for me and that would just be awful.

And if he paid a cover charge to meet you in a club? What if you put an ad in the local newspaper, is that OK? I really hate to see the "I am better because of how we met" card being palyed particularly on a site like this. How did you meet your husband? Did you pay someone to be part of a student program to bring you here? My company paid an airline to take me to Ukraine for business and OOPS, I met Alla while I was there, actually in Prague so we are MUCH better than you because we not only met by chance, we met in another country! PLUS I was being paid to be there! Yeah, that's how all married people should meet, just like me. If I was like you it would just be awful! To think if I even HAD to look for a woman,OMG! They should just pop out in front of you when you least expect it, THAT'S True love.

See how that works?

You understand that there are plenty of people in this country that would just love to make it impossible for you to marry your husband, right? They think YOU are one of "them", one of those evil foreign brides, one of those evil subservient Russian sex slave girls. Must be!

C'mon, how we meet has nothing to do with this. Technology, fortunately, has made it possible for us to meet people all over the world. Deal with it.

I also am a bit dismayed at your lack of respect for women from 3rd world countries. I do not consider RUB as such but still, you think a woman can be enslaved for a green card? Seriously? You have a much higher regard for the value of a green card than my wife.

[ONA 133]

I also am a bit dismayed at your lack of respect for women from 3rd world countries. I do not consider RUB as such but still, you think a woman can be enslaved for a green card? Seriously? You have a much higher regard for the value of a green card than my wife.

I don't think that Mrs. Brock was trying to say that it's OK, when a women gets treated like that over a green card. I think she was trying to say that some men think that if they "saved" a woman from one of "poor" countries, they have a right to treat her in any way they want or "send her back" if they don't like something. It's not OK, when a woman left her job, her family and friends to be with her man and maybe just adjusted to the new way of life. But it happens sometimes, unfortunately.

[james&olya 1,121]

I don't think that Mrs. Brock was trying to say that it's OK, when a women gets treated like that over a green card. I think she was trying to say that some men think that if they "saved" a woman from one of "poor" countries, they have a right to treat her in any way they want or "send her back" if they don't like something. It's not OK, when a woman left her job, her family and friends to be with her man and maybe just adjusted to the new way of life. But it happens sometimes, unfortunately.

And this is the part of her post that I agree with. The rest of it was, at best, poorly thought through! I hope she does not have to become the recipient of the same unthinking kind of prejudice she demonstrates herself to understand what is wrong with her statements!