nat geo

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

I know, to you 22 is old. To me, 22 is not even old for one of my children.

It's all about Hugh Heffner and Viagra. Those two make life worth living imo.

Edited February 7, 2012 by Why_Me

[UK_Fan 192]

But I get the impression you think there is a large majority of women who come over here and are turned into virtual slaves, unable to do anything or even think their own thoughts without their husbands holding "everything over their head." I'm sure it happens, but I seriously doubt it's in the majority. In fact, I'd be willing to bet the instances of this kind of abuse are about the same as the levels of abuse nationwide in US marriages.

nah, i'm not saying that the majority are, and i'm not just talking about RUB women, i just brought RUB up because the special was about that.

i guess where a lot more people write about their bad luck then their good one on here, that's why i took it as a majority.

It's all about Hugh Heffner and Viagra. Those two make life worth living imo.

i saw a special on him, THS on E! i think, and his gf Holly said that Hef doesn't need viagra, she said she "surprises" him and he's ready to go lol

Edited February 7, 2012 by Mrs.Brock

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

Hmmmm. You're sort of on to something, but you're not quite there. Specifically about some of the American husbands of RUB spouses here, yes, *some* of them take advantage of their wives. *Some* of them post the most appalling things about their wives here, without their wives' knowledge. Absolutely. And yes, some of them "feel superior" to them. But I don't see any evidence that they show this superiority by holding "everything over their head." Maybe it's happening, in some cases it wouldn't surprise me, but I haven't read anything that, for instance, husbands are threatening to send their wives back if they don't do x.

But I get the impression you think there is a large majority of women who come over here and are turned into virtual slaves, unable to do anything or even think their own thoughts without their husbands holding "everything over their head." I'm sure it happens, but I seriously doubt it's in the majority. In fact, I'd be willing to bet the instances of this kind of abuse are about the same as the levels of abuse nationwide in US marriages.

mox, in cases where the relationship goes south, we see it all the time. Soviet partners or otherwise. "How can I send him/her back to their country" is the title of those threads.

I don't know what Mrs. Brock means (she can speak for herself) but to me, I wonder why someone would have this on their mind when a relationship ends. It implies that the relationship was less than loving before it failed.

[UK_Fan 192]

mox, in cases where the relationship goes south, we see it all the time. Soviet partners or otherwise. "How can I send him/her back to their country" is the title of those threads.

I don't know what Mrs. Brock means (she can speak for herself) but to me, I wonder why someone would have this on their mind when a relationship ends. It implies that the relationship was less than loving before it failed.

they would have it in their mind exactly because they played with a toy, got disappointed in it and now are looking for a return policy.

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

okay, you might be right there, about womans information and all that, but still, wouldn't you rather have it the way you did or even meet her online then contact god knows who, and they give you some woman that you don't even communicate with directly?

Of course I am right, mail order brides are illegal. I would not have my situation any other way, nor do I wish anyone else's to be different nor do I care how they met, nor do I think I am better because we met the way we did.

It is required by law in order to get a visa that you must have met IN PERSON and you must show evidence of a relationship, which usually involves communication and further visits. Where on earth do you get the idea that you pay someone and they give you a woman you have never met or communicated with?

[UK_Fan 192]

Well, I think there's a tendency to be bitter when things do go awry, and people lash out. That's human nature. So if the relationship broke up, no matter the reason, the guy is going to want to lash out by having her "deported." People get crazy when relationships go down the toilet. One particular VJ member had a marriage that tanked, and now he's making noises like he was somehow scammed. Before it all went to hell, it was all great, never a bad word to say. But when it went to hell, all of a sudden he's being scammed. Not because he's being scammed of course, but just because there's a tendency among some to blame anyone but themselves.

you hit the nail on the head.. and the US citizen is always a victim lol

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

and you were talking about me making laws up.. lol

yet again you, even yourself, are making all of this out to be a business transaction.. like a "beneficiery" is an object and there are requirements to "have" or "be" one.

geez.

I was being facetious. Showing ridiculousness by being ridiculous. But at least you see what happens when, or if, we allow certain people to make rules over other people's lives where they have no business

[UK_Fan 192]

It is required by law in order to get a visa that you must have met IN PERSON and you must show evidence of a relationship, which usually involves communication and further visits. Where on earth do you get the idea that you pay someone and they give you a woman you have never met or communicated with?

from that special.. the second guy that was coming to Russia to meet up with the girl that the agency picked out for him, he said himself that he hasn't talked to her directly, only through the main woman who runs the agency.

I was being facetious. Showing ridiculousness by being ridiculous. But at least you see what happens when, or if, we allow certain people to make rules over other people's lives where they have no business

gary, i never said that there should be a ban on this whole mail-order business, but to ME, it's demoralizing.. like i said, i'm telling you one thing, and you're talking about another lol

[Bad_Daddy 2,209]

Well it's nice to hear that men never get played like a toy. It's all the man's fault and if he get's p*ssed after he was suckered and then wants to send whoever back for using him for a visa...well that goes against all the rules.

Now how do I cut my testicles off so I can have that frame of mind? I mean only a douche would think it doesn't go both ways. Any guy here lose a house to a woman? Come on now speak up? And if so did you get p*ssed, or did you just say; "I'm a stupid mother fckr and I deserved it no matter what the circumstances were." ?

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

Yep...see above. Relationships break up all the time, but the "VJ" relationship is particularly vulnerable to some nasty repercussions. My brother broke up with his longtime girlfriend, and she took his dog. Not because she wanted the dog, but because she wanted to spite him. With international relationships, the ultimate spite is to send them packing. I think that's why we see a lot of that here. I doubt most of the foreigners really were scamming for a green card, it's just a form of revenge to make sure they're kicked out of the country.

Maybe it is just revenge, idk. Except for the cases of blatant fraud on the part of the foreign spouse, it sounds like just wanting to toss back a small fish.

[UK_Fan 192]

Well it's nice to hear that men never get played like a toy. It's all the man's fault and if he get's p*ssed after he was suckered and then wants to send whoever back for using him for a visa...well that goes against all the rules.

Now how do I cut my testicles off so I can have that frame of mind? I mean only a douche would think it doesn't go both ways. Any guy here lose a house to a woman? Come on now speak up? And if so did you get p*ssed, or did you just say; "I'm a stupid mother fckr and I deserved it no matter what the circumstances were." ?

actually i said it went both ways, but you hear more about men being done wrong, then women.

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

from that special.. the second guy that was coming to Russia to meet up with the girl that the agency picked out for him, he said himself that he hasn't talked to her directly, only through the main woman who runs the agency.

And what? had you ever talked to your husband before you met him? You are really being silly now. Are you against blind dates? Are you against friends "fixing up" their friends with dates? An agaency arranged a MEETING of two people,adults, both interested in marriage and with similar interests according to profiles they submitted. what is the problem?

They will meet and then the will talk and then they will communicate and then they moght get married sometime in the future. Just like the rest of us did. I never talked to Alla before I talked to her, then I talked to her, carried her bags, she asked me out for coffee, I asked her out for dinner after the coffee...so what? I asked her to marry me four months later after lots more visits and lots more communication. How does it matter HOW WE MET and talked the first time?

I still do not get what you are talking about, there are no mail order brides, no one picks wives for you, no one sells women.

[Rebecca Jo 1,962]

actually i said it went both ways, but you hear more about men being done wrong, then women.

Actually, I read plenty of both around here.

[Gary and Alla 3,696]

gary, i never said that there should be a ban on this whole mail-order business, but to ME, it's demoralizing.. like i said, i'm telling you one thing, and you're talking about another lol

the IS NO mail order business, it was banned LONG ago.

[UK_Fan 192]

And what? had you ever talked to your husband before you met him? You are really being silly now. Are you against blind dates? Are you against friends "fixing up" their friends with dates? An agaency arranged a MEETING of two people,adults, both interested in marriage and with similar interests according to profiles they submitted. what is the problem?

They will meet and then the will talk and then they will communicate and then they moght get married sometime in the future. Just like the rest of us did. I never talked to Alla before I talked to her, then I talked to her, carried her bags, she asked me out for coffee, I asked her out for dinner after the coffee...so what? I asked her to marry me four months later after lots more visits and lots more communication. How does it matter HOW WE MET and talked the first time?

I still do not get what you are talking about, there are no mail order brides, no one picks wives for you, no one sells women.

one last time, i'm telling you, because proving a point to you is like talking to a wall. to me, it is DEMEANING to do that to women, just pick them out of the catalog okay?

the IS NO mail order business, it was banned LONG ago.

not according to that special.. hence the name "e-mail-order bride"

google "mail-order bride".. you mean to tell me noone does it? there are thousands upon thousands of sites.. just because it's illegal, doesn't mean it doesnt exist